• Member Since 10th May, 2015
  • offline last seen Jan 30th, 2018

Sparkletop Rainbows


Just a pegasister who's a huge fangirl on the inside. She follows back and would love to be your friend! (Avatar found at http://swa-oku.deviantart.com/art/Hetalia-Fan-Art-Samovar-Teatime-360787743)

T
Source

It was hard for Flurry Heart to grow up being a princess. She didn't want to grow up. Her friends have left her, and her mother is not there for her when she needed her most. Flurry thinks her life is over, but there is always a speck of hope that had changed her life forever.

Please remember to like if favorited.

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 24 )

Awww! So cute and sad at the same time! Excellent.:pinkiehappy:

Great job. I really liked it.

who disliked this!!! :flutterrage: :facehoof:

all my hate.......:flutterrage::facehoof::trixieshiftleft:

7050894 kinda but i kinda didnt like it cuz you made it seem like everyone is gonna bully her and everyones gonna hate her and from the way cadence was described it kinda made her sound like a total beyoch:fluttershysad: other then that it was good

7051541

I wrote that, because Flurry is in her teen years, so she expresses the things that affect her a little dramatic. And I only described Cadence that way, because Flurry is Cadence's first child, so she doesn't know what to do with teen rebellion, and she has become busy over the years being a princess and managing a whole empire, so she couldn't really care for Flurry that much.

7051600 oh ok then i forgot about that! haha thanks for reminding me GREAT STORY! :pinkiehappy:

Hello! Let me give you some advice about writing, if you value how I write, of course!

Consider improving your word-count for each chapter. Most readers want to have a healthy amount of words to read. I personally suggest 2,000-5,000 words per-chapter. Don't worry yourself to rags about it, though, You may need to be more familiar with writing to produce all those words! Also, the two things that generally attract potential viewers at their cursory glance is the description and your cover image.

I pray some feedback is pleasant to you!

7058946

Thank you! I appreciate your feedback! :pinkiehappy:

Cute little story.
I liked it! :twilightsmile:

7074727

Thank you! :pinkiehappy: I wrote it for the Protect Flurry contest.

I see a continuation where Flurry dethrones Cadence and makes those ponies who neglected her pay.

7075219

Well, Flurry's anger won't go that far. I picture her as just someone who needs some attention and a little love. Her anger is just only her sadness and depression in a different way.

Flurry might even forbid her mother from ever attending any of her birthday parties.

7124858

Sounds something like 5-year-old Flurry would do :trollestia: :derpytongue2:. But in case your wondering, what Flurry would actually do is to just be a big grump until her mother actually tries to give her attention.

7126073 I suggest writing a story on that.

7127915

Well, you just gave me a new idea!

7128744 Send me a link when you're done.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!