• Published 13th Mar 2016
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Princess Twilight Sparkle's School for Fantastic Foals - kudzuhaiku



Princess Twilight Sparkle's School for Fantastic Foals is the place to go for friendship studies.

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Chapter 93

Twilight Sparkle didn’t like the feel in the room, not at all. Caper’s study had a terrible feeling of oppression in it, a sense of wrongness in the very air, but this was the place that Princess Luna wanted the will read. Princess Luna sat behind Caper’s massive mahogany desk in silence, her expression unreadable. The desk itself was a horror of design, on each end there was an earth pony with their heads bowed in submission, and the top of the desk rested upon their backs. Try as she might, Twilight Sparkle could not remember a time in her life when she was offended by a mere object. The desk conflicted with everything she had heard about Caper and how well off his subjects were.


She had the most dreadful thought and sat there wondering if Caper’s well off subjects was something done for show. It was impossible to know, as Caper was dead. Reaching out her foreleg, she wrapped it around Sumac and gave him a reassuring pat upon the neck, as he seemed uncomfortable as well.


The sound of Twilight Velvet’s voice, her mother’s voice, made Twilight’s ears perk. Her mother was wearing reading glasses and Twilight heard her mother say, “We have come together for the reading of the will of one Arcturus Capella Lion Lulamoon. Princess Luna has requested that I act as her estate lawyer and I have agreed. Are there any objections?”


Tensing, Twilight waited, wondering if any might object. She wasn’t sure why anypony might object, but tensions were high now. Even though she was a princess, Twilight realised that she didn’t know how any of this worked, she was ignorant of this whole process. Her own family were nobles, wealthy, well off, they were entitled to certain rights, privileges, and such, but also had certain obligations, demands, and conditions that could be placed upon them at any time. Such was the life of a noble.


But Dandelia was royalty by birth. This bothered Twilight more than she cared to admit, but she couldn’t say why. Something about this flew in the face of the equality that Twilight believed in. Sure, the nobles had special rights, but they also had more expected of them. So it balanced out, right? Feeling troubled, Twilight desperately wanted to know what sort of checks and balances Dandelia had for what had to be an impressive list of privileges.


“Very well.” Twilight Velvet adjusted her reading glasses and let out a sigh. “We shall continue. In brief summation, the will states that all of Lulamoon Hollow, including the peasants, the villeins, the crafters, the debtors, tenants, servants, and the serfs of the land are to go to Dandelia Lion Lulamoon. Princess Luna has demanded that a consensus be taken of the residents of the demesne to determine their happiness and will to stay.”


“I have a question,” Sumac asked.


Twilight felt her heart leap up into her throat and she was thankful for Sumac’s bravery. She glanced over at Trixie, who sat on the other side of Sumac, and saw pride in her eyes. Expectant, Twilight waited, her ears perked as she hoped that Sumac would ask a good question.


“Go ahead, Sumac.” Twilight Velvet’s words were patient and gracious.


“What’s the difference between a peasant and a serf?”


Hearing these words, Twilight felt giddy that Sumac was disrupting everything with his foalish curiousity. She wondered how her mother might explain these outdated and, Twilight felt, unwanted social divisions.


“Sumac, a peasant has some land, but they typically don’t own it. They rent it from the landowner, in this case, the Lulamoons. Most of their earnings go to the landowner and some of it is redistributed back among the peasants, according to their needs.” Twilight Velvet’s voice was emotionless and flat, without feeling, the voice of a educator teaching about an unpleasant subject. “Serfs on the other hoof, they own no land and have no holdings. They work on the demesne wherever they are needed, and the land renting peasants can use them as labour. They exist to serve the land, the peasants, the crafters, and the local lord. The local lord provides for these homeless, landless serfs, protects them, and sees that most basic needs are attended to.”


Twilight, who had her own demesne, Ponyville, she felt that she was far more progressive and her residents were free ponies. She gave them almost total freedom to go about their lives, their business, and she did very little to restrict them. What few restrictions there were ensured that everypony was safe, happy, and secure. Some freedoms had to be restrained, held back, no one wanted mad scientists to start robbing graves for example. Some ponies just took it too far when given too much freedom.


Nodding, Sumac said nothing else.


“After his demise, Caper wanted his demesne, one of the last functioning true fiefdoms left in Equestria, to be set up as a historical preserve, in perpetuity. The details of the arrangement will need to be sorted out at a later time.” Twilight Velvet looked over at Princess Luna and peered at her through her reading glasses. “As the Matron of this family, this of course, falls to you.”


With a faint but regal nod of her head, Princess Luna acknowledged Twilight Velvet’s words.


“Beatrix Lion Lulamoon, you may open your portion of the will. It will open for nopony else but you and I have not yet read its contents. Please do so now.” Twilight Velvet made a gesture with her hoof at Trixie.


Trixie opened the sealed scroll tube with a touch of her horn and Twilight could see that her eyes were still red and weepy. Twilight watched as Trixie pulled the scroll out, waiting, wondering what the scroll said. The fine parchment paper crackled with strong magic, and Twilight knew that nopony but Trixie could read it, it would be invisible to anypony else that tried. No doubt, the scroll could also defend itself against persistent attempts to read it.


By all accounts, Caper was powerful.


Feeling a growing sense of concern, Twilight watched as Trixie’s barrel began to hitch as she read. It was difficult to watch her friend suffer and Twilight wondered if Caper had left some insults in his final missive to his granddaughter. Trixie’s eyes went from left to right as she read each line of the parchment and Twilight felt a growing, unwanted tension.


“It’s very complicated,” Trixie said at last.


“You can do it.” Lemon Hearts gave her dear friend a pat.


“Caper acknowledges me as his heir, now that I’ve stopped acting like a snotty showmare and have settled down.” Trixie’s voice was hoarse, raspy, and full of phlegm. “It states that I am a worthy mare of noble breeding and it acknowledges Night Light as my father.”


There was a gasp from Night Light.


“But there’s more,” Trixie said in a hesitant voice, “conditions. There are a lot of conditions. Caper has launched a posthumous paternity suit against Night Light, which will be activated upon the reading of this will, and the lump sum of damages for failing to care for his out of wedlock daughter is to be collected, accounted for, and then I am supposed to give it to a charitable agency that aids widows and orphans. It actually says ‘widows and orphans.’ And there are more conditions as well.”


“Caper was always a complex pony.” Twilight Velvet let out a sigh, glanced over at Dandelia, and then looked at Trixie. “Never have I ever met a pony that had such a capacity for both cruelty and kindness. He was like two sides of a coin.”


Hearing Twilight Velvet’s words, Princess Luna choked. She sat there, all too aware that the entire room was staring at her, and she said nothing. Instead, she averted her gaze and looked down at a wind up clock sitting on Caper’s desk, trying to avoid the stares of the ponies gathered around her.


“Trixie, do continue,” Twilight Velvet commanded.


“The final condition is that I carry on the Lulamoon name somehow.” Trixie took a deep breath. “I’m not obligated to marry, Caper made that clear in his writing, he actually states that through my hardship and suffering, I have earned my place, my standing, and my independence as a mare. He says I am entitled to produce an heir in the same way that my deceitful, lying mother did”—she paused and looked up—“his words, not mine. But to receive my full inheritance I must produce at least one heir. It states that I am also free to just walk away.”


“Oh.” Lemon Hearts looked a little stunned. “I suppose you’ll walk away—”


“No.” Trixie’s monosyllabic utterance was hard spoken. “No, I’ve spent my entire life running away and trying to flee my past. If Caper is willing to make peace with me from beyond the grave, I am willing to oblige.”


“Am I going to have a little brother or a sister?” Sumac asked.


“Someday.” Trixie let out a sigh, looked at Lemon Hearts, and then turned to face Sumac. “Of course you’ll have some say in this, but don’t be like Pebble and think you’re in charge.”


“I’ll be good, I promise. Honest Apple.”


“So, I need to find a unicorn of reputable breeding that Princess Luna approves of as worthwhile stock.” Trixie’s eyes, either half open or half closed, depending upon if one was a glass is half full or glass is half empty type, remained upon Sumac. “I will also ask your opinion, Sumac.”


Sitting off in a corner, Dandelia hung her head and remained in silence.


“Lemon Hearts… we’re kinda in a relationship.” Trixie took a deep breath and looked Lemon Hearts in the eye. “I won’t do anything that might shake things up between us and I need to know where you stand on all of this.” Trixie’s ears drooped, then rose a little, then fell, and then rose as a hopeful look spread over her face that was as slow as the rising sun.


“Don’t you dare throw this away because of me.” Lemon Hearts’ eyes were fierce, but also full of adoration. “I’m okay with a foal. I love them, I love them all, and having one from you would be wonderful. I just want Sumac okay with it. I don’t want him feeling like he’s being replaced. That would bug me. But he’s a pretty laid back little guy and I’m hoping he’ll be okay with this.”


“We’ll talk more later.” Trixie gave Lemon a reassuring smile. “You, me, and Sumac.”


“Yes, there is the matter of Sumac Apple.” Twilight Velvet cleared her throat and focused upon Sumac. “Princess Luna feels that you have been poorly treated and that you have been wronged during your stay here. She is mortified and embarrassed that her distant descendent treated you in a manner that Princess Luna feels does not befit a Lulamoon.”


Sumac sat up straight and his ears stood up. On his horn, Boomer yawned, stretched her tail, and then went back to sleep, all without ever opening her eyes. Licking his lips, Sumac squirmed. Beside him, Twilight Sparkle leaned over a little and patted him on the neck as she looked at her mother.


“I don’t need anything.”


Hunching over the desk, Princess Luna stared at Sumac with wide, hopeful eyes.


Her papers rustling, Twilight Velvet peered down at the parchment she held in her magic. “To Sumac Apple, Princess Luna offers one square acre of land that is adjacent to the Lulamoon cemetery. It is to be bequeathed to him and his future family, so that they might always have a home here.”


“Would that make me a peasant here?” Sumac asked as he first looked at Twilight Velvet and then at Princess Luna.


“No, Sumac, that would make you a landowner within this demesne.” Twilight Velvet looked over at Dandelia, who was now stewing in silence, a horrid scowl upon her face as she did nothing to hide her feelings on the matter. “It would make you a landed member of the gentry, which is a very big responsibility.”


“It would also mean that your foals, when you have them, will always have a place here, as family.” Trixie bowed her head to Princess Luna and said, “Thank you for giving me a chance to keep my family together. Sumac is, now and forever, my son, and I want to provide for him.”


“So, by having land here, it means I have to have foals to pass the land on to, and they have to have foals too.” Sumac reached out and he grabbed Twilight’s leg, then gave it a tug. “Twilight, should I do this? Or is this just a ploy to make me feel obligated?”


Twilight, shocked by Sumac’s canniness, burst into a grin. “I do believe that Princess Luna is trying to curry a little favour with you.” Still grinning, and with a glance at the Princess of the Night, Twilight continued, “Yet, Princess Luna is no doubt being sincere and has other reasons for what she is doing. The Apples are a very influential family all over Equestria, and with this demesne being established as a historical preserve, the Apples who live here will no doubt appreciate a member of the gentry that is loyal to their interests. I suspect that Princess Luna might be trying to placate them and assure them.”


“As a Lulamoon with a vested interest in the future of this demesne, I have to say that I approve of this arrangement.” There was a look of smug satisfaction upon Trixie’s face as she looked at her own mother, who appeared to be devastated by what was being done.


Clearing her throat a few times, Twilight Velvet said, “Well then, I do believe that just about wraps things up—”


“Hold,” Princess Luna commanded. “We have some final conditions to impart.” Lifting her head high, Princess Luna focused her stern, maternal gaze upon Dandelia Lion Lulamoon. “You, Dandelia, you are very much like a hostage that has fallen in love with their captor. While you can see Caper’s wrongs, you do not condemn them with your heart. You share in his wickedness, even if you do not realise it.”


Dandelia withered under Princess Luna’s gaze, and stared down at the floor.


“You need help, healing. You have a sickness of the mind.” The hardness in Princess Luna’s face melted away and her expression softened. “Like Us, you need help to become well again. We have also been held hostage by a great evil. We are sympathetic to your pain, your suffering, for We have endured much in the bonds of Our own captor. We too, have been tortured into madness, so much so that our judgment has become impaired in certain matters.”


The entire room was now in pained silence while Princess Luna paused.


A single tear rolled down Princess Luna’s cheek as she looked at her distant daughter. “It seems that this family is cursed and kept from happiness. We wish to help you, and to this end, We place a final condition. For you to keep ownership upon this demesne, you will receive help from Princess Cadance and her army of therapists, just as We have done. If you refuse to do this, you forfeit everything, and We shall give this demesne to Beatrix Lion Lulamoon, who is well upon the road to recovery and wellness.”


Twilight struggled to keep her jaw from hitting the floor.


“We need an answer now,” Princess Luna said to Dandelia. “Will you bow your proud neck or will you pass this fiefdom to a more deserving heir?”


Ears drooping, looking crushed and fragile, Dandelia let out a wail of anguish as she considered Princess Luna’s ultimatum. It seemed that her voice had returned. Night Light rose from where he was sitting and went to Dandelia’s side. He touched her, but she jerked away. Since it seemed that he could not comfort her, he stood beside her chair.


“You do not have the luxury of time.” Princess Luna’s voice was now hard again. “We need to resolve this will now. I will have your decision now or I will make the decision for you.”


“Fine, I will take your help!” Dandelia spat.


“You will keep a civil tone or We will silence your insufferable tongue yet again!” Princess Luna rose, her eyes blazing with fury, and she smashed one front hoof down upon the wooden desk.


Being made only of wood, it shattered, becoming a pile of debris and splinters. The fury of the Night Princess reduced it to smithereens, leaving little behind. Princess Luna stepped over the heap of ruined wood, moved Twilight, Sumac, Trixie, and Lemon Hearts aside, and she crossed the room to where Dandelia was sitting.


“Do not make Us regret Our moment of sympathy!” Drawing herself up to her full magnificient height, Princess Luna towered over Dandelia, who cowered in her chair. “Begone from Our sight! You are henceforth banished to your bedchambers until such a time that you can offer a sincere apology to all that are present here! BEGONE!”


And with that, Dandelia vanished from view.

Author's Note:

Next chapter: one pony in particular will have their final say.

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