Ch2 - Ticket Master - Part 2
Ponyville’s Tiny Librarian
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Chapter 2
Ticket Master
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Part 2
Twilight groaned, an irritated look on her face as she could feel growing pain in her forelegs that were stretched like a bubble gum. From her left Rainbow Dash was pulling her towards herself. “Why do you want to give the ticket to Rarity? I thought that you didn’t like her as much as you liked me!”
Twilight bit her lips as she could feel a powerful force pull her in opposite directions. “Ah must agree with Dash. How could ya choose Rarity over me? Do ya have any idea how much it would help mah farm if Ah could go!”
“I thought we were friends,” Rainbow Dash said as she squeezed tiny foreleg between her hooves while pulling it towards herself.
“Why Twilight, why?” Applejack said as tiny foreleg between her hooves gained at least a centimeter in length.
Twilight’s annoyance and pain only grew as Rainbow Dash and Applejack played the tug of war with her tiny forelegs playing the role of the rope, both mares complaining that she has chosen Rarity over them and demanded an answer. Twilight grit her teeth, sweat covering her red face as she held air in her lungs, refusing to scream. Finally, her irritation reached its limits as she lit her horn and freed her hooves from this painful torture, both Rainbow Dash and Applejack lost their balance and fell onto their backs with a weak thump.
Twilight landed on her rear hooves as she puffed on her forelegs before casting a healing spell on them, and next she gave Applejack and Rainbow Dash an annoyed glare as both mares sat in front of her. “I am taking Rarity with me because I owe her an apology for how I treated her in the Everfree Forest. Besides, it is Rarity’s dream to meet nobility in Canterlot and socialise with the upper class that she admires so much.”
Both the pegasus and the farm mare lowered their heads in shame as Twilight asked curiously, “Why would you even want to go? I thought you both would hate to be there.”
Dash’s and Applejack’s mouths were agape as they looked at Twilight in disbelief, Applejack spoke first, “Hate to be there? How could ya think that? It's a heap of more than just nice, Ah’d love to go.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow. “What for, Applejack?” she asked as the idea of Applejack spending time at a boring party with nobles who would call her names flashed in her mind. Suddenly she felt as a hoof grab her and pressed against a shoulder.
“If Ah had an apple stand set up, ponies would be chasin’ our tails ‘til the cows came home. Do ya have any idea how much business Ah could drum up for Sweet Apple Acres?” Applejack explained with excitement, gesturing around the farm with her other hoof.
“With all that money, we could do a heap of fixin’ up around here; like replace that saggy old roof, and Big Macintosh could replace that saggy old plough,” the farm mare took deep breath and pressed Twilight even harder as she added, “and Granny Smith could replace that saggy old hip.” Finally she sighed, lightening the hold over the struggling mare. “Ah would give mah right hind leg to go to that Gala.”
“Applejack, most of what you said just doesn’t make sense. The Gala isn’t like that,” Twilight commented as she pushed the hoof away, only to be taken away by Dash’s.
“The Wonderbolts perform at the ‘Grand Galloping Gala’ every year, I can see it now…” Rainbow Dash explained how she would amaze everypony and the Wonderbolts with her tricks while pressing the little unicorn against her cheek while her other hoof gestured over the sky. “...And then they would welcome me as their newest member.”
“Well, you have a point, but–” Twilight was released, landing on the grass, only to jump to the side the moment Applejack rushed in, avoiding being slammed by farm mare’s foreleg as dust spread around it. Both taller mares started to argue with each other, ignoring everything she said.
Twilight sighed in relief and straightened her softened body, massaging her forelegs while looking at her arguing friends, who quickly started to hoof wrestle. The little unicorn rolled her eyes and turned around, galloping from the farm towards Rarity’s house, deep in her thoughts. It seems that I and my new friends still have a long way to go. I hope that at least Princess Celestia’s and Luna’s reunion is going better than that. Her ears shot upward at the loud noise, causing her to turn around to look at her hoof-wrestling friends… who were now wrestling in the mud. Surely it was impossible for the royal sisters’ reunion to be any weirder than that.
“You’re going to pay, Celestia!” Luna yelled as she flew around the trees in the royal garden, her wings flapping like there was no tomorrow while two pegasi guards followed right behind her. She ended up separated from her sister and Cadence minutes ago, each doing their best to lose the chasing party.
She evaded left and right, even circling around the trees as the giant hooves of the guards tried to catch her now one kilogram heavy body. Suddenly one of the guards blocked her way, forcing the princess to slow down before she could crash against his belly, ending up pinned between guard’s armored hoof and a wooden surface of a tree.
“Release us this instant, or thou wilt feel our wrath!” Luna screamed as she struggled against the guard’s hoof, but it was to no avail; unable to move anything besides her head.
“I am coming, hang in there!” Luna heard the voice of her sister as the guards turned their attention towards her, ending up blinded by a strong flash of the sun flare. Once the guard holding Luna was blinded, the tiny alicorn flew at him with full speed and, with one swift swing of her hind leg, she delivered the pegasus a kick strong enough to push his hundred times heavier body towards the ground as he slammed against it with a weak thump, freeing Luna now from his grasp.
Luna didn’t waste this opportunity as she lit her horn and shot another pegasus in the wing, causing him to fall as well. She then gave an angry glare towards her sister as she asked coldly, “How hast thee gotten us into this mess, sister?”
Celestia smiled at her shrunken sister as they were the same size. “I just wanted to spend some valuable time together with you like in the good old times when we fought against monsters and enemies to protect our little ponies,” Celestia said with an innocent smile and her forelegs curled against her belly.
Luna lit her horn and sent several thunderbolts at two giant pegasi guards who flew to catch them from behind, her sister shooting beams of golden magic of her own as they earthbound two enthusiastic pegasi guards temporarily.
While Luna’s memories of the events when Nightmare Moon was in control were slightly blurred, she still remembered quite an impressive resistance and skills the royal guards displayed while fighting her in the Everfree Forest. Those guards she faced today however were nothing to compare, unable to catch two alicorns despite their massive size and number advantage.
Maybe those Celestia send after us were trained knights, and the ones we’re facing are like squires at best, that would explain why our sister picked them for this crazy game. Luna thought, hearing a silent voice in her head a moment later.
It matters not. First she tricks Twilight, next us, Cadence and the guards, and now she humiliates us. This cannot go unpunished.
“Once We grow back to our original size, thou shalt spend three minutes under our mighty hoof for this!” Luna growled as a loud noise caught her attention, ducking her head just in time as a beam of magic passed above it.
Luna’s eyes opened widely, her mouth agape as she stared into a hole in a tree right behind her, smoke and burned remains decorating it. She quickly turned around, focusing upon the unicorn guards who ran between the trees and sent more deadly projectiles against her as she and Celestia started to evade. Luna looked at her sister and asked with panic, “Why art thine warriors shooting deadly beams of magic as if they’re attempting to kill us, sister? It was meant to be an innocent game of tag.”
Celestia set up a golden barrier around herself and Luna to give them a small break, an awkward smile on her face. “Well… I kind of ordered them to catch us by using any means necessary, aside from changing it into a game of hunter and prey.” The sun princess rubbed back of her neck as she whispered, “And I may or may not have possibly told them they could use lethal force–”
The golden barrier shattered in an instant under a barrage of giant beams as Luna and Celestia were pushed away. The night princess grit her teeth and flapped her wings as she slowly regained her balance and flew away from the unicorns, her sister right next to her. Luna looked to her side and growled, flames of rage in her eyes. “Thou shalt spend five minutes under our hoof when this is over,” she stated as another beam of magic flew above her head, “Six!”
***
Celestia just smiled at the threat as she felt adrenaline flowing through her body, evading beams of deadly magic and fighting for her life side by side with her sister like in the good old days. Oh Luna, you have no idea how much did I missed the times we spent and played together. The times we teased and pranked one another, pushing our bodies to our very limits. I haven’t had that much fun since we turned part of our castle into a trap-filled dungeon... she thought, only to notice a fireball heading towards her and her sister.
“Look out!” Celestia shouted as her wings flapped strongly, dashing upward.
Luna, who was still looking at her sister, turned her head to see a giant meteor of fire flying at her. The tiny alicorn braced her forelegs for the impact, and the moment the burning flames of offensive magic passed her, she could feel an unpleasant smell of burned fur while her mighty and majestic body was now burnt and charred, smoke coming off it.
The blue alicorn gave her sister an angry glare as Celestia was giggling at the sight of her grilled posture. Luna’s anger bottled in her, her transparent mane flaming just as bright as the fireball that had hit her just a moment ago. Her sister briefly wondered if the flames were a manifestation of her sister’s rage, or if her mane really had caught on fire from the fireball; but Celestia didn’t the have time to find out as a powerful and loud voice full of vengeance pushed her with great force.
“TEN!”
Twilight went a long way from the farm towards Rarity’s boutique, sometimes even teleporting ahead to cut down her distance, but the moment she walked next to Sugarcube Corner, the upper doors opened. Twilight’s ears twitched, her head turning to the side as a giant pink shape charged directly at her; reflexively she jumped back, avoiding being crushed by an energetic mare only by inches. “Are you alright, Pinkie?”
Pinkie Pie shook her head and looked around, but after a light bulb appeared above her head, she looked down to see a little unicorn staring back at her. “Hey, Twilight! What brings you to the Sugarcube Corner?” Pinkie asked as she took a cupcake from behind her back and placed it in front of her small friend. “Cupcake?”
Twilight shook her head as she pushed the giant cupcake to the side. “Thanks Pinkie, but I already ate an entire apple today. I'm quite full.” Twilight sat and spread her forelegs as she tried to show the size of the apple. “It was nice almost bumping into you, but I need to visit Rarity. Farewell.”
The little unicorn waved her hoof and jogged at a steady pace towards her destination, but Pinkie Pie quickly caught up as she bounced by her right side. “And why are you visiting her, Twilight? Anything fun going on at the boutique?”
Twilight increased her speed, trying to stay ahead of the bouncing pony. “Not really,” she started as she looked up at her friend, “I just want to pay her for the clothes she made for me.”
“Oh, but she gave them to you as gift! You don't pay for gifts, silly! Imagine how mean it would be if I wanted ponies to actually pay for the parties I made for them!”
Twilight raised an eyebrow at the word ‘pay’, asking, “Tell me Pinkie, how do you even earn enough bits to organise those parties if you don’t ask anypony to pay you, let alone have anything left for living?”
“Oh silly, it's very simple,” Pinkie started, getting Twilight’s attention who slowed down a bit and exposed her ears. “I work at Sugar Cube Corner! I have access to all I need for the parties while Applejack and Fluttershy supply flour and eggs at discounted prices!”
Twilight nodded her head, finding the answer very logical.
“As for the things I need and don’t have access to, I just find them.”
Twilight gave Pinkie a curious glance. “Find them… what do you mean?”
“By saying that I find them I mean that I find them, silly! For a smarty, you sure ask the silliest of questions,” Pinkie replied cheerfully as Twilight looked at her with confusion. “If I need something to cheer up other ponies, I get it; I don’t question how, I'm just happy that I can make other ponies happy with it.”
Twilight’s eye twitched and looked at Pinkie as if she was insane. “Whatever you say, Pinkie. I think I will be going, the ticket to the ‘Grand Galloping Gala’ is not going to deliver itself.” She said before galloping, but a pink streak of lightning passed her and was now towering in front of her.
“Did you say ‘ticket for the Grand Galloping Gala’?”
***
Twilight galloped as Pinkie Pie bounced behind her, still singing her song about how the ‘Grand Galloping Gala’ was the best place for her. Do those ponies really don’t understand that it’s the most boring party in the history? Twilight thought as she increased her speed, still looking at the singing mare right behind her. No pony will buy a single thing from Applejack, the Wonderbolts’ attention will be so focused on the nobles that they will ignore Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie will be bored to death or she will annoy all the nobles to death... which on other hoof won’t be so bad in the long run.
Twilight, deep in thought and not watching where she was going, ended up bumping into something. “S-sorry,” she said as she looked forward, only to see a young white bunny massaging his head before giving her an angry glare, but quickly his hostile expression changed into a confused one. Next to the bunny, Twilight could see forelegs of the overprotective pony who saved her from the Manticore. “Sorry Fluttershy, it seems that I bumped into your friend.”
“It’s quite alright, I’m sure Angel Bunny doesn’t mind. Am I right, Angel?” Fluttershy asked but didn’t get any response, her little friend too focused on examining the tiny unicorn in front of him. “Twilight, this is my friend Angel Bunny, Angel, this is my friend Twilight Sparkle. I hope you both will get along,” Fluttershy introduced as the little mare smiled and walked closer to the bunny, who was just a bit bigger than her.
Twilight raised her her hoof towards him and said, “Nice to meet you, Angel.” The white bunny just stared back at her without returning the gesture, his ears straightening to the sides.
“Now Angel, be nice and shake her hoof,” Fluttershy said, but after Angel ignored her request, she pushed him gently, “Please.”
Angel and Twilight stared at each other for a few seconds before Pinkie Pie jumped over their heads and landed on top of Fluttershy. Angel jumped in panic as he grabbed Pinkie’s hind leg in attempt to pull it but to no avail, only to see the party mare being levitated off the yellow pegasus, surrounded in a lavender aura.
“Are you alright, Fluttershy?” Twilight asked as she used her levitation to help her stand, much to Angel’s surprise who blinked a few times at this display of power, looking between the tiny unicorn and the levitated pony.
Fluttershy was about to answer, but Pinkie Pie jumped between them and started to talk with her about the ‘Grand Galloping Gala’. Twilight sighed and looked at the bunny in pity and spoke, “Sorry Angel, nothing I can do to stop Pinkie Pie, your owner is on her own.” With one quick nod of her head she passed the pet and galloped towards Rarity’s house while the bunny just looked at her running away with a dumbfounded expression, only to rub his eyes moment later.
Twilight finally reached Rarity’s house. At this point she could use her magic to open the door, levitate an object to knock on it, or she could just use the entrance for a cat, but it would be far too easy and no fun at all. Instead, she flexed her legs and jumped at the door while kicking it with her hind leg, not too strong so as to avoid leaving any tiny mark of damage, but also strong enough to make it sound as if somepony was knocking at her door. Twilight repeated her jump-kick three more times before she could hear a loud, “The door’s open, please feel free to enter.”
She once again jumped at the door, her forelegs grabbing the handle while hind-legs pressing against the edge of the entrance, pushing it open. “Twilight? I had no idea that you would be coming. What can I do for you darling?” Rarity asked as she trotted towards the sofa gracefully and gestured her hoof at it. “Please, hop on and make yourself comfortable.”
Twilight did as she was told. The moment she was sitting on the sofa, Rarity sat right next to her and asked, “So what brings you to my Boutique?”
She smiled cheerfully and levitated over her tiny saddlebag, several bits jumping out of it. “I just came to buy the clothes you made for me. I hope I’m not interrupting.”
“Oh no no no no no, Twilight, I would not dare to take bits for something I gave you as a gift.”
Twilight frowned. “I won’t take no for an answer, I want to pay for them like a common pony would, I don’t want any special treatment.”
“But…” Rarity paused as memories of their first encounter flashed in her mind. With a sigh of defeat, she levitated the collection of tiny clothes to Twilight. “That will be twenty bits, since even though I used expensive materials to make them, the required amount was very small.”
Twilight levitated the bits over to Rarity and took the clothes in her levitation field. “Thank you, also, I have a present for you, an apology gift for how I treated you in the Everfree Forest.”
Rarity lowered her head slightly and looked at Twilight with curiosity. “And what may it be? Surely I do not deserve any presents after I hurt your feelings back then.”
“I want to hear nothing of it, Rarity,” Twilight started as she jumped on Rarity’s muzzle, now hanging onto it as she looked her deep in the eyes. “I know how much you would love to go to Canterlot and meet the nobility you admire so much, so I’m sure you’re going to love it!”
Rarity blinked before crossing her eyes, focusing upon the mare on her nose. “Yes, I do, but what does it have to do with—”
“Because the princess sent me two tickets for the ‘Grand Galloping Gala’,” Twilight said hastily as Rarity’s eyes went wide, mouth agape but silent. Twilight climbed further on her muzzle and spread her hooves in excitement, “And I’m inviting you to accompany me! Aren’t you excited?”
Twilight waited patiently, her hind legs holding Rarity’s muzzle form both sides as she observed the stunned mare. She was expecting for Rarity to dance from joy or even embrace her in a hug, something ponies tended to do.
“Thank you very much Twilight, it is very generous and thoughtful of you,” Rarity’s smile softened, “but with a heavy heart, I have to refuse.”
“What?” Twilight whispered as her grip weakened, slowly sliding from the muzzle until she fell off right onto the sofa. While lying on the comfortable surface and with the giant crazy unicorn towering above her, she screamed, "WHAT!"
Rarity cleared her throat with hoof over her mouth. “After the talk with you and the former princess, Cadence, I understood how selfish, self-centered and shallow I was.” Rarity turned her head away from Twilight as she waved her hoof. “I am sure there are friends who need and deserve to be there with you far more than me.”
Twilight’s mind was a mess. “What did you do with Rarity?” she yelled as she pointed her hoof at Rarity accusingly, but the elegant unicorn shook her foreleg.
“Hush Twilight, I may not act like my usual self, but only because I am trying to change for the better. If I were to go with you for my selfish desires, one of our friends would not realise her dream.”
“But… Buuuuut,” Twilight couldn't form any other word than ‘but’ in her throat as she was now speechless. “My head... I want to go home…”
The little unicorn no longer felt the soft surface of the sofa as a blue aura levitated her and tiny clothes outside of the Boutique. “I wish you and another friend you choose to enjoy the Gala, and I hope that the clothes you bought from me will serve you well, have a pleasant and eventful day,” Rarity said as she closed the door in front of Twilight slowly, leaving her speechless and stunned, glaring at the closed door motionlessly with her eye twitching occasionally.
***
Rarity looked outside of her home by the window as she watched her tiny friend walking away, only to raise her head up proudly while saying to herself, “Good work Rarity, you have made a big step forward in your new selfless life. Thanks to your sacrifice, one of Twilight’s friends will have a lot of fun…” her smile weakened slightly, ”partying with the nobility…” her smile turned upside down, “meeting very important ponies…” her ears flattened against her head, “marrying the charming prince…” tail drooped onto the floor. “What have I done!?”
Rarity started to tremble, only to trot in circle in panic as images of herself at the ‘Grand Galloping Gala” flashed in her mind, the very idea that she could marry Prince Blueblood was the final push into insanity. “Realisation of your deepest dream had been given to you on a silver plate, and you just threw it away!” Rarity screamed to herself as she placed her forelegs on the wall and with one strong swing, she hit it with her head. “Rarity, you stupid mare.” She hit her head against the wall again.
“You could have become popular.”
Smash
“You could’ve married a prince!”
SMASH
“You could’ve spent an entire day in the company of nobility!”
SMASH
“Stupid… stupid… stupid!” Rarity repeated over and over as she hit the wall with her head repeatedly, its surface cracking under the force of the continuous blows.
***
Overwatch groaned.
It wasn’t exactly the groan of frustration. Or the groan of exasperation. It was simply the groan of somepony who already knew what was going to happen and wished to be done with it already.
To be fair, it was probably the nobility’s fault that everypony have such strange notions of what the Grand Galloping Gala is, she mused. It was hyped up as the event that everypony should go to, and it didn’t help that it was generally held at the castle with Princess Celestia there to attend. Why would anypony care about an event if it really only held appeal to the noble class?
Regardless, ponies everywhere always got super excited for the gala. The jealousy and disagreements it spawned were a few of the things contributing to her headache at the moment.
A flap of wings drew her attention, and she glanced up into the sky just as Steel Blade alighted just next to her on the roof of Carousel Boutique.
Well, at least she could have some company.
Steel Blade frowned as he tried to find a comfortable position. “I can’t even be surprised to find you up here,” he muttered. “So, what’s happening? And why do you look like you want to punch something?”
“Grand Galloping Gala,” Overwatch droned. “Ponies know that Twiny has extra tickets.”
The white pegasus let out a hum of understanding. “Suddenly, it all becomes clear,” he said. “Y’know, if Twilight doesn’t give them to anypony else before she gets back, we could always offer to take them off her hooves and then there wouldn’t be all this drama around them.”
His companion straightened to attention, frowning. “Why would we care about the gala?”
Steel Blade snorted. “It’s not like we don’t attend every year anyways. This time, we can at least talk to each other without looking unprofessional.”
He paused. “Well, without looking more unprofessional, in your case.”
“And what, we’ll call it a date instead?” Overwatch smirked. “Shouldn’t you already have a special somepony at your age? You’re what, moving into your late thirties?”
“Well…” Steel Blade responded, feigning thought, “I guess I did chase a few mares when I was younger. Y’know, in between all the guard shifts and extra training.”
“Wow. Really? I can’t believe I never noticed,” the guard mare said, genuinely surprised. “And none of them worked out?”
Steel Blade simply shrugged. “Well, it’s more that I’ve had my eye on one particular mare for a while now…”
“Ahh, that makes a bit more sense. I hope that works out, by the way, especially if you left her back in Canterlot,” Overwatch said, before hopping off the roof like a cat and carefully following behind their charge.
The guard stallion chuckled. “Thanks,” he said with a soft smile, before jumping off after her with a flutter of his wings.
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Wow. Overwatch is either messing with Steel Blade, or she is really clueless. I still think she's a Changeling, so I'm going with option A.
Can't wait to see how twiny reacts when she gets back and spike has five extra tickets waiting for her, since Luna made Celestia send them.
This is gonna be good.
First Spike has to find the extra five tickets...
how can overwatch be so . . not overwatching?
Overwatch you are BLIND.
7040678 seriously
Heh heh. I want to see how Twiny can handle all the crazy ponies who want to the "Grand" Galloping Gala.
sought
...Is what I only found.
Poor Twiny, but I think she needs a lesson to accept generosity from friends. I also love Luna's determination to break Celestia of her Manipulating habits. I can't wait to see what comes up next. Though I do think Twiny should get a few chances to see the tickets behind the bed since she's so low to the ground.
7040678
7040887
Sometimes even the best roll a 1.
7039940
I also vote for option A since I can't exacly predict what my top editor have in store for those two. I mean, I wrote most of apperances, but he can add their apperances here and there.
7040127
7040180
7040678
lol.
7040967
Than stay tunned for part 2. I will try to upload it next week.
7041151
Will fix.
7041353
Twiny was a bit too distracted when the tickets arrived, so unless she return to her room on the second floor, I doubt she will find the extra tickets.
Also, congratulation for being the first person who commented on Luna/Celestia's interactions in this chapter. While I know that it is story mostly about Twiilight, I wanted to add interactions between royal sisters as an element of the story.
I am actually really surpriced how few comments this chapter have and that most of them are about Overwatch's scene. Did I screwed up in writting so much that everything else besides the last scene isn't worth any attention? I hoped that Luna/Celestia's interactions and Rarity's scene will be more eyecatching than that.
7041475
The bellowed TEN! had me laughing
Rare defintly has some earth pony in her....WHAT DID THE ELEMENTS DO TO THEM!?!?!
Hows cadance fairing with the guards? Or did she do the smart thing and decline when luna smushed her sister?
Sorry for the lack of review. Been busy. Enjoyed chapter. Will comment more when have chance.
Is headbutting a wall when you have a sharp object on your head (I.e. A horn) really a smart idea?
'Twilight waited patiently, her hind legs holding Rarity’s muzzle form both sides as she observed the stunned mare, expecting for Rarity to dance from joy or even hug her as it being hugged happened quite often. '
May want to break this sentence up as it is rather long. Also the last part doesn't seem to make sense. What about something like 'or even being hugged as she had found most ponies tended to do.' Sorry not the best at phrasing myself.
Silly Celestial falling into bad habits. Good thing Luna's there to set her straight although her big sister seam to enjoy winding her up a little too much. Maybe Luna should visit Twilight and Ponyvillie as a way to expand her social skills as well as punishing Celestia by not spending time with her. (Luna going on a shrunken adventure of her own or with Twilight. If the Mane 6 have strong magic of their own maybe they could join in.) Cadnice does disappear after shrinking. I wonder what misadventures she has as the sisters bond.
How does this capacity / stamina for Twilight's magic work and what limitations she have? In what ways she can increase it?
Poor Raity trying to not be vain and now it has back fired on her. What will she do to get her place back without looking like a fool?
I wonder what going through Angel's mind about the tiny owner/ carer he just met? (I can't believe he wouldn't take offence at being called a pet and therefore be insulted at the suggestion of having owner, which implies he is property.)
Next chapter a town wide hide and seek with Twilight's tickets as the prize.
7041782
So you bet on Rarity having an earth pony magic? Where did you get that idea?
7042063
Considering that Cadence/Luna and Celestia split up at some point during that game, Cadence is either hiding or chased. Though to be fair, Celly and Luna are priority targets since most guards so Cadence have less to deal with. As for Cadence backing of, it's not the case. The idea to see what kind of challenges Twiny face was building up over the years of carring for her.
7042246
Not really, especially when horn is unicorn's most vunerable point as hitting it distract the caster from casting a spell. Still, ponies are tough, so I think the wall and Rarity's pride suffered the most.
Thanks, I fixed it. What do you think of:
I suppouse Luna had some bad influence form Nightmare Moon. Desire of vengence doesn't dissapear quickly and is a source of enjoyment to some degree, though I am sure Luna will try to keep it in check and punish Celestia only when she deserve it.
Think of it as a diference between long and short-distance runner. Short distance runners try to maintain as high speed as possible to win a race, long-distance runners conserve their stamina and can run long, but not as fast.
Twilight's training and her potential resemble of a short-distance runner. She can levitate outstanding weights despite her tiny size, and she can lift weights that can give earth ponies run for their magic, but she drain her reserves very quickly. I suppouse Twilight could improve her stamina by improving her earth pony magic, aside from doing long-lasting work that doesn't require too much strength.
However, when it comes to her magic, there's not much she can do. Her magic is very powerful. The only way would be for Twilight to train how to use magic in smaller ammounts and conserve it. It would require training how to restrain her magic and use it in very small ammounts. Though it would be a bit boring, so it will take some time before Twiny will be ready to practice it.
On side note, Luna's blessing helps to make up for that weakness at night as it restore Twilight's magic at faster rate.
I suppouse Rarity will just decide to keep herself in check and not ask for the ticket, no matter how much she want to go. Though she may feel jelous towards friend that will go to the gala, unless Twilight find out that she have extra tickets hidding behind a bed.
I think he was too distracted to see a pony smaller than him to care. His mind probably was like: (a tiny pony who can levitate weight hundred times her own? What the heck is going on!)
So yeah. Priorities.
7042687 The fact that Rare cracked her wall with no problem by headbutting it...
also: points at 7042246
At the end of the segment with Celestia and Luna when Luna said "TEN!" I instantly thought of this.
i know it may be a while before we see the Poison Joke with Zecora (you do plan to make a chapter of that right?)
tho i wonder what kind of effect it will have on Twiny if it doesnt give her the wobble horn. will she become a giant instead?
tho if she will get the wobble horn i guess she and Applejack gonna have some fun when AJ gets tiny so she can experience the world at Twiny's size
7043179
Luna is waaay more fair in terms of punishments than that. After all, she decided to give Celestia only ten minutes under her hoof considering that because of Celestia's idea, she was burned by a giant fireball.
7044223
Of course I won't miss that one, though it will take a long time before we gets there.
To be honest, first episodes of MLP season 1 had many flaws that in my eyes could be improved, so my story will focus quite a lot on them. Though it will speed up overtime. (Not to mention my own original content I am planning to add).
Actually...... I think this might have actually helped her really given how that event ends up. Also love the irony of Twilight not being able to comprehend her being overtly generous being refuted with the other being bull-headed humble when she literally just did the same thing.
7047672
That's Twiny's flaw for you.
She sometimes is too humble for her own good and while she likes helping others and doesn't want others to help her and so on.
7048119
I can see how this humble streak is gonna continue to implosion. Thing is I don't know whether this Twilight or show Twilight causes the most disaster when their flaws implode into their little chaos spirals.
Dammit, i thought there was a new chapter... okay honestly, what was wrong with a 8905 word chapter considering the first one was also 8880?
7053183
Shhhh..., quiet now.
Otherwise we will get another unread but had read chapter.
:P
(Sorry, I just kidding.)
7053183
Well, the issue is that majority of chapters I wrote are as massive, so I decided to keep each chapter shorter and of similar leight to give readers more breaks between specific events.
Aside from that, and it is more of a selfish reason, I would like to know what readers thing of each part of my story I write for them, and reading a few comments after uploading last chapter (most of them only mentioning Overwatch's scene and 1-2 at best even mentioning Luna/Celestia's scene, Rarity scene or the farming scene at the begginign) I figured out that the longer the chapter is, the more events readers forget about when they get to the end.
7053257 That is understandable, but i would have suggested to start with something like this with the next chapters, it isnt a major deal, but some people may be a bit disapointed now, and many people already did read the chapter, which reduces the feedback i could get.
And on people forgetting, i dont know how much i would represent the average reader, but by the time i finish reading something, no matter if its 2k or 20k words, ill remember everything until it switches from short to long time memory, then i will only remember the major arcs and things that did entertain me most. I literally had to stirr up my memory which of Overwatches scenes you could mean, but i did remember the interactions between Luna and Celestia. That said, those were the scenes that entertained me most, so if i would have had written a comment, it would have been about that. And my guess is that this is the case with many other readers, they will remember and comment about things that stuck out, be it in a good or bad way, so with most people commenting on a specific scene positively you may get an idea of what your readers did like most, and what did not turn out to be memorable to the majority.
Also, he last scenes, and especially cliffhangers are always prone to be a big part of the comment section, its just the last imput a readers mind got from your story before they write a comment. And cliffhangers are notorious for sparking speculations, discussions or even people outright claiming youre he devil for letting them hang
This can also be used to spark feedback on certain sceens, like imagine how many people would have commented on the mini-princesses vs guards if you would have had a one liner scene at the bottom like something funny happeing to luna and her screaming "NOW ITS 15 MINUTES!", some people may have a good laugh about something like that, or recalled he scenes, or even wondered what funny things happend to make her increase celestias royal squeezing. I certainly would have.
So yeah, sometimes it helps to imagine you being the reader, and use that to play with your readers minds to encourage feedback.
7053257
You were still far from the biggest ones. I have some fics in my Favorites, with 30,000 words in a chapter. Now, look at this fanfic's chapters 22 and 23. They. Are. Big.
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7053337
I don't see this as absurd.
Unicorn magic require a lot of focus and knowledge from the caster's side to use. The smarter and harder studing unicorn, the better spell they can use and more efficiently, though how strong spell is depend on how powerful the caster gets.
Pegasus magic can be partialy used directly for weather control, so pegasi need to have some basic knowledge on how to clear weather, however when it comes to flying, they can go purely on instinct.
Earth pony magic works on its own so an earth pony doesn't even need to know that it have it. The knowledge how to grow plants, collect apples and take care of the farm is passed form generation to generation.
Besides, knowledge that each race of pony have its own magic isn't all that common. Twilight never realized that there are more branches of magic until Celestia taught her.
7053411
I wasn't expecting any more feedback form people who read it already. I just split it for new readers to have less of a load to read at once.
This may actually work. Since I am spliting this into two chapters, I may as well add such scene. Give me a moment to come up with something.
7053411
After a moment of thinking and checking next parts, I think this would be best to add in next part instead.
Has anyone told Twilight 's parents about the events of nightmare-moons-tiny-adversary? Given the last time Twilight was in danger they were very angry and annoyed that they weren't told. Is this why Shinning armour is not seen in the first 2 series (both firing on her and being part of a plan to put his sister in danger having known for months what was going on?
Not sure why you split up the chapter but then again I am an avid reader so wouldn't be bothered about chapter lengths save if I was late for something and wanted to get to the end.
7053891 I doubt it, otherwise we'd probably get a howler type scene. or several. Though that might be because velvet is trying to decide exactly how much to yell at who.
7044271 oh now that is interesting I'm curious about what Twiny would get from poison joke this time (kinda hoping it's not floppy horn but something new like the size spell reversing and making her bigger than celestia) but if she does stay tiny when Applejack shrinks will be interesting too.
7054330
Instead of Twiny Sparkle, she'll be Titanic Sparkle. Which will also cause her to grow to the size Spike was at with his greed growth.
7054330 She grows extra legs. Bug-light Sparkle.
7054330 me thinks, she become as scared as she was after beign turn small...scared of everything, so scared she make fluttershy look like rainbow dash in bravery.... that or she beocem large but still has the effect fo the other spell so she uber powerfully
I think I know who Steel Blade has the hot's for but I'm not saying anything about it
Rarity was scaring me here
7053891
Twilight's parrents were most likely informed that Twilight decided to stay in Ponyville and don't mind at all. Though I doubt that they were informed about event with Nightmare Moon, at least not yet.
7061347
She did? Lol.
Ah
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This'll be interesting.
We get to see Twilight give them the tickets, while actually talking to them about the Gala. Rather than everypony running in blind. This'll be an interesting take on G3.
7059078
Everyone's favorite changeling.
7065114
Fixed, thanks.
You won't wait for long. It is literally chapter 1.
You will have to wait and see. I think she appear in chapter 6.
7065150
I am not so sure in this case. I think in this context, it is less of "royal guards" as organization and more as "royal gaurds" as plural (many of them). Just personal feeling.
7065168
G3? Don't you mean G4 ?
7065499
But the Royal Guards are part of the Royal Guard. Thus are part of the group / organization that trains those ponies.
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And G3 [Grand Galloping Gala]
Kind of like how E3 is Electronics Entertainment Expo.
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Still look forward to the future chapters ^_^.
blue
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How hast thou gotten us into this mess, sister?
humiliates
tree
Raise of the "Tiny" joke?