Mad Libs

by Pen Stroke

Cute Coughing Cuddles - [Slice of Life][Rainbow Dash][Applejack]

March 2016 Mad-Lib
Submitter: Skeeter The Lurker
Submission: This Comment
Pre-read & Editing: Illustrious Q, Kirk Heller, Kevinltk

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Applejack tried to fight the tickle in her throat, the horrible itch that was building with each passing second. She would resist. She would not give into the temptation. She would keep herself perfectly composed like a stalwart apple tree. She just had to keep her eyes closed, keep her breathing steady and—

Cough

Biology beat out Applejack’s attempt at zen, her lungs convulsing as a whooping cough escaped her throat. With it came a ball of fuzz, as orange as the mare herself, which just manifested with the coughs as they came up her throat. AJ spat out the fuzz ball, one of many that now sat in a misshapen, spit-soaked pile next to her.

Another cough reverberated in the small space, but this one came from the mare that was the source of Applejack’s current irritation. Rainbow Dash spat up a fuzz ball, grumbling and cursing as she sat on the far side of the very clean, clinical, and empty room. Twilight’s magical mishap room was a recent addition to the crystal palace but was already proving it was worth the cost of renovation.

“And how are my patients doing?”

Applejack glanced to the small glass window in the room’s north wall where Twilight gave a little wave. “Hacking up hairballs, like we were a half an hour ago.”

Twilight forced a smile, though her ears flattened a little bit at the sound of irritation in Applejack’s voice. “Okay, so I think we can rule out that this is just going to work its way out of your systems. I’m sorry that crystal orb I was studying did this to you. Who knew it contained an ancient practical joke charm?”

“Wasn’t your fault, Twilight.” Applejack turned her head, her brow furrowing as she glared down Rainbow Dash. “You certainly weren’t the one horsing around with it like it was some bouncing rubber ball.”

“You could have told me to stop!” Rainbow barked back.

“I did tell you to stop. I specifically said, ‘Rainbow, stop bouncing that thing before ya break it!’”

“Shows what you know,” Rainbow said as she jumped into the air, hovering towards Applejack. “You said ‘y’all,” not ‘ya.’”

Applejack was forced to cough and spit out a particularly large ball of orange fuzz before she returned her glare to Rainbow. “You hard-headed bird brain! I do believe that the pronoun wasn’t the important part of what I was trying ta say. ”

“Girls, please, I know you're both frustrated, but I’ll get to the bottom of this,” Twilight said, trying to break up the fight without going into the quarantine room. The magical decontamination airlock still wasn’t fully operational. “I’ve already ruled out several possibilities of what the spell might be. Once I’ve finished my analysis, I’ll have an answer for you.”

“Is that all ya wanted to tell us?” Applejack asked. “Cause no news isn’t exactly good news right now, Sugarcube.”

“Well, I did need to come let you know I have to step out for a little bit.” Twilight held up a quill in front of the glass. “Broke my quill, and my backup one is missing. Shouldn’t be gone more than fifteen minutes, then it’s right back to researching a cure.”

“You don’t have a backup quill?” Applejack asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I know, I know, but all 1337 of the places where I keep backup quills were empty,” Twilight said. “I’m starting to wonder if that strange feather duster I saw Discord with the other day was made from my quills. Still, I’ll get to that mystery after I figure out what’s happening with you two. But for that, I need a quill to make notes with.”

“Guess there’s nothing to be done. But can’t you at least bring us some pillows or something? This floor is almost as hard as Rainbow’s head.”

“Hey,” Rainbow snapped. “You got something to say?”

“Yeah, and I’ll say it. Your hard head got us into this mess.”

“Hey, you were the one that thought it would be okay for us to wait for Twilight in her private study. I mean, come on, it’s not like you didn’t know I do stuff like this.” Rainbow crossed her hooves as she slowly flew back to her pile, coughing and spitting out another fuzz ball.

“Wait, now y’all are trying to blame me for this?”

“If the horseshoe fits.”

“Okay, you two sound like you’re having fun and that I need to hurry. Back in a flash.” With that, Twilight disappeared from the clean room’s viewing window, leaving AJ and Rainbow to brood and glare at one another from opposite sides of the space. For a time, that was all they did. They’d glare, they’d cough, they’d spit out fuzz balls, and then resume glaring. Each had a pile of several dozen fuzz balls going, but finally, the rhythm of bodily noises was interrupted.

Squeak

“What was that?” Applejack asked. Her and Rainbow’s ears were perked up, swiveling around. “Ya heard it too right?”

Squeak

“Rainbow, you playing some joke?”

“Isn’t me,” Rainbow said before a third squeak, slightly different from before, reached their ears. It then became more frequent and more varied, like a small platoon of squeaky toys. Eventually, each mare was looking at their pile of fuzz, where they could now see slight movement.

With a triumphant squeak, a tiny creature popped out of Applejack’s pile, making her quickly stumble back. It was a tiny copy of herself, down to her freckles and cutie mark. The first tiny AJ was then joined by others, each fuzz ball in the pile starting to change into a tiny clone. They were squeaking to one another, as if having conversations, but then all the little clones looked over at Applejack.

They smiled, and then they pounced. The several dozen tiny Applejacks leapt at the original, clinging to different parts of her body. They didn’t bite or kick, but they began to snuggle. They nuzzled their heads into her fur and continued to make happy squeaks every so often.

“Help!”

Looking over at Rainbow, Applejack could see she was faring no better. Her pile of fuzz balls had come to life as well, and they were trying to cover her in cuddles. “What is going on?”

“Don’t know, it’s like… it’s like how them parasprites made copies of themselves.” She struggled with another cough, spitting out a fresh fuzz ball that unrolled into a new little clone within seconds of hitting the floor.

“Well, make them stop hugging me,” Rainbow complained as she was trying to pick each clone off of her gently, only for them to jump right back on.

Applejack gritted her teeth and focused at the little clones. She spoke with a tone of voice she usually reserved when Apple Bloom needed some gentle scolding. “Now y’all listen here. Ya can’t go cuddling ponies that don’t want cuddling. Now go find something else ta hug, ya here?”

Rainbow nodded, shouting at her own tiny clones. “Yeah, go find something else you… hugging leaches!”

The clones all stopped, a few squeaking to one another before they began to crawl down from Rainbow and Applejack. There were some sad faces, but then a few happy squeaks filled the space. The two tiny groups of clones had noticed one another and ran to meet each other in the center of the room. There, the cuddling resumed, each tiny Applejack finding a tiny Rainbow Dash to cuddle with.

“Hey… hey, wait… don’t do that,” Rainbow said, starting to blush. “We don’t do that.”

“Yeah, stop that. Rainbow and I don’t hug and snuggle and… I don’t even know what those two over there are doing.”

The tiny clones, however, paid them no mind, happily squeaking at one another and cuddling. Rainbow and Applejack managed to glance at one another, both of their faces reddening with a blush before they turned their heads back down to the crowd of clones, raising their voices to the point they echoed through the whole castle.

“Stop cuddling!”

Author's Note:

If you see typos, please report them via PM. The little bit of extra effort is greatly appreciated.

Comments

[Skeeter The Lurker]

Pffffftttt.....!

Ok, points for the unexpected hairball clones. That earned a good few laughs from me.

Personal verdict on this:

cdn.pophangover.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/nailed_it-s240x320-227191.jpg

~Skeeter The Lurker

[howard035]

This is awesome. The only thing that would be better is if Gilda showed up for no discernible reason, just to explain that those tiny fuzzy creatures are considered a deadly enemy of the KlingonGriffon Empire.

[Lewis a Cute Pegasus]

I'm guessing this is how Fluffle Puff was created.

[PrincessNyx]

awwwwwww, that's adorable!

[MyLittleBronyDude]

Amazing chapter!