Fallout Equestria Stable 30

by Deathpony

Out of the Stable and into the Wasteland

It was a normal start just like any day I woke up slammed my Pipbuck on the wall to make the annoying beeping sound stop I don’t know why I just don’t turn the alarm function to be honest probably has to deal with the fact that I really don’t know how to use it.

I did my daily morning routines such as showering, brushing my teeth then putting the boring Stable clothes we wear everyday, then stepped out of my room and into the grey hallways that make up Stable 30. I went to lunch and just like everyday it was boring old boring hay and oats same as usual. I saw Cherry again and went to walk over to him.

“Hey what’s up Frost? Why do you look so glum today is going to be exciting a trader is coming today who knows what he might have”. Cherry said with a smile.

That was surprising to me at least because nopony told me and I’m the one that usually knows about anything that involves stuff outside the Stable. “Really there is?” to which he nods to “When is the trader coming? Because I wanna see what he’s got for sale, might have some interesting stuff but I wonder if he will accept bits since I have no caps”.

“I’m pretty sure he will accept bits but might cost more but you might be able to exchange them for caps for a price though of course nothing is free out there”. Cherry said while chewing on some oats and getting it all over his face and table in the process of it.

“Ewww what have I told you about chewing while talking it’s disgusting plus it gets the food everywhere I better not find any in my mane or coat like last time it took forever to get out”. I said while looking to see if I could find any that got on me once I saw that there was none I calmed down.

“You know you will never get me to quit that old habit it’s impossible remember you tried last time and went crazy because of it”. He said while smirking.

Yes I did try once but never again will I try nor will it be mentioned what happened. “Yes I remember that and we both said we would never mention it ever again”.

As I finished saying that a security pony came up to our table and said “Do you happen to be Frost Wire?” in monotone emotionless voice that they usually have.

I answered with “Yes why am I needed somewhere or something like that because my shift hasn’t even started at the Nursery yet”.

“Yes the Overmare said she needs to see you in her office so she sent me to escort you and that you are supposed to leave now”.

That’s weird I thought because I never got in trouble in the Stable before this okay you got me I used to get in trouble all the time as a little filly trying to get my cutie mark, but other than that nothing else I did came to recent memory. “I didn’t do anything wrong did I?”

“No the Overmare just said she needs to see you right away is all”.

“Okay then well I guess I will see you later then Cherry”.

With that I sat up and walked away with the security pony to the Overmares office. We were finally at the Overmares office which was about a ten minutes top trot from the lunch room to her office.

“Well we're here she should be able to see you now” he motioned with his hoof to the door for me to go in.

With that I trotted up to Tarts door, but before I could she opened the door and motioned to me with her hoof to come in.

“What am I here for I didn’t do anything wrong did I?” I asked with confusion in my voice.

“No I didn’t bring you here to talk about your little expedition to the surface” which shocked me how did she find out?. I looked up to her with a confused face. “I can see the confusion on your face did you really think I wouldn’t find out? There are cameras at the entrance that are monitored 24/7 every single hour of every single day, but I’m getting off track here why I called you here is because we have to leave the Stable as fast as we can”.

I stood there processing what she just said to me and it shocked me. “Why do we need to leave the Stable it has enough supplies and power to last another hundred years?”.

“Because you see a group is coming to enslave the entire Stable they are called The Zebra Remnants they believe in the old ways of the Czar and kill or enslave any ponies that they come across”.

“B-b-but why do they do that? That’s just wrong, it’s just wrong to enslave and kill ponies why didn’t you do something to stop this!?” I practically shouted.

“Shhh we don’t want to alert anypony the only ponies that know are me and you if anypony else found out it would be widespread panic and rioting all over the Stable”. Tart said in a hushed kind of tone.

“But what are we going to do? We don’t have the kind of weapon that they will have, we only have close quarters weapons they will tear us to the security ponies to shreds our only hope is those turrets but they don’t have much ammo”. I asked while trembling and generally trying not to freak out because I mean who wouldn’t freak out that somepony is trying to kill you all, and or enslave all of you?

“Well we are going to leave plain and simple I already have all the things packed so that we can leave and Rose doesn’t know she just thinks she's going on a trip okay? She’s just a foal she doesn’t need to know about these kind of things”. Tart tossed me a bag full of food and purified water, it also had a pistol in it with four magazines ten rounds of ammo each.

“How’d you get this past security without them finding out?”

“Well being Overmare has it’s benefits you know. Pick up your bag were leaving now”.

I went to pick up the bag but a muffled ptoo and a spark of metal in front of me stopped me from picking it up.

A zebra materialized out of thin air he had some sort of cloak on my guess was that it was what made him invisible. “I don’t think your going anywhere you're just going to stay right here”. He said in a accented voice.

“Why are you doing this to the Stable, we haven’t done anything wrong to you?” Tart asked with a angry tone in her voice.

“What did you expected Xavier to actually hold the deal with you? Hahaha don’t make me laugh please seriously. We are the Remnants we take what we want when we want and how we want to.”

“What!? I thought we had a deal Xavier told me so himself”.

“Well I guess Xavier changed his mind then”.

“T-tart what is he talking about, and what is this deal he is talking about?” I asked in a scared tone.

“Tsk tsk you mean to tell me you haven’t told anyone your little secret yet what a shame”. He said with a mocking kind of tone.

“*sigh* sorry Frost I hope you can forgive for what I’m about to tell you and show just know I had my reasons for it”. With that said a green light emanated from Tart and got so bright I had to shield my eyes once the light was gone in Tarts place was a weird looking thing, it looked like a pony but had black fur, butterfly like wings with holes in them, had a crooked horn with holes in it and had holes in its legs.

“W-what are you?” I asked with a scared kind of tone to my voice.

“I am a Changeling we can feed off of emotions but the one we like to feed off of is love, and if your wondering what the deal was it was that the Remnants wouldn’t bother this Stable and I would get to be Overmare if I gave them food and water”. She went back to looking like Tart again by time she finished. “And do you not remember the accident Tart had a couple days ago and got hospitalized for? Well it killed her she didn’t make it she died because of blood loss, so I took her appearance so all of her friends and family would be happy”.

“Yes and look where that got you hmm?? Now you are going to die any last words? Also Xavier sends his regards to you” I heard a door opening and a security pony was opening the door.

“Yes look behind you!”. But he was too late a shotgun blast blew his brains out all over the wall and his head disappeared into a red mist.

It took me a couple seconds to realize what had happened but when I did I threw up on the floor.

“Strawberry are you okay!?” the security pony shouted.

“Yes I’m fine but what’s the problem”.

“It’s the Stable some group launched a surprise attack against us the turrets held them back for a while but they killed both guards.”

“Okay I want you to alert the rest of security and focus on saving as many Stable residents as you can possible”.

With a salute the security pony left to do his orders and immediately afterwards the sounds of gunshots were heard echoing through hallways.

“We can’t stay here come on Rose hope up onto my back”. “Oh no Rose saw what happened” I thought to myself and she had tears streaming down her cheeks from her eyes and they were red and puffy from crying.

“Come on sweetie hop up onto my back we're going to somewhere nice away from all these mean zebras okay?”. Rose nodded to that and climbed onto Tarts back then wiped off her tears with a hoof while sniffling.

“Okay I was hoping that we could leave without causing a commotion but that plan just got destroyed so let’s go before they decide to come and see why this zebra hasn’t come back yet”. I nodded to that and we trotted over to the door and walked out into the hallways there were some dead zebras but mostly security ponies or anypony who picked up in arms and fought back.

“I need you to keep your eyes closed okay Rose? Just keep them closed until I tell you to open them”. She listened and kept her eyes closed like she was told I don’t think she would’ve opened them anyways since she was so scared.

“What are we going to do they are probably all over the place?”

“There is a secret passageway by the Stable Atrium if we get there we can get out without any problems at all that’s if we don’t get caught which probably isn’t going to happen. The passage leads to the tunnel outside the Stable door and at the exit of the tunnel so we shouldn’t encounter any when we leave”.

As trotted towards the Atrium we could hear the echoes of a gunshot every now and then they were probably finishing the rest of the Stable security off. As we got nearer and nearer to the Atrium the more bodies we could see because it was so close the the Stable door and Tart had to tell Rose multiple times to keep her eyes shut and not to open them. There was also blood all over the place, severed limbs and guts all over the place. If it weren’t for the fact I already threw up all my stomach contents I would've done it again but instead I just dry heaved.

We were about halfway to the Atrium when I heard some voices and swiveled my ears to listen.

“Hey Tart I think I hear somepony” I whispered to Tart and she also stopped to listen.

“I don’t get it why don’t we just kill all of these ponies don’t know why were ordered to keep them all”. A voice said it sounded like a buck.

“Because we can keep them as slaves you idiot or we can sell them for money”. A second voice said.

“Whatever lets just get this over with and look for any stragglers left behind and catch them”.

“Alright let’s get this over with I don’t know why we're even looking because they got most of the Stable ponies in the lunchroom already”.

“Tart what do we do they are coming down this way!” I harshly whispered to Tart.

“I don’t know let me think of something there's nowhere for us to hide!” She whispered back rather loudly.

“Hey do you hear something?” Oh no I thought they heard us.

“Yeah I think I did let’s check it out it came from down here”.

“See what you did you got us caught no we have nowhere to hide”.

“Yes but you do remember what I brought myself and gave to you right?” Wait... No she couldn’t be suggesting that! There’s no way I could kill any living thing I’m a Nurse after all.

“How could you suggest that I kill somepony! It’s just wrong to kill something!”

At that moment the zebras came around and saw us. “Well what do we have here? You three are going to be coming with us”.

“Rose I want you to get off my back and run over to Frost okay? Once you get to her keep your hooves over your ears”. With that Rose ran over to me and put hooves to her ears while shutting her eyes.

Tart had pulled out her pistol and shot two rounds at the zebra one grazed his shoulder and the other was absorbed by his barding. The other zebra a mare came around and fired her shotgun with a blam at Tart but she ducked.

I frantically reached into my bag with my magic to get the pistol she gave me .While Tart and the zebra mare were focused on each other and shooting the stallion tried to sneak up on her.

I finally got the pistol out the bag and I targeted the shot two times at the stallion's as he was about to shoot Tart head the pistol reported with a bang! bang! and his head disappeared into a red mist. I dropped the pistol from my magics shaky grip and it clattered to the ground.

That seemed enough distraction for the mare and just like that her head turned into a red mist. “Thanks Frost he would've killed me” she looked onto her back and saw that Rose was okay she just had her hooves to her ears.

“Is the loud banging gone Mommy?” Rose asked with a scared kind of tone to her voice.

“Yes the loud banging is gone” Tart said with a nod of her head and nudged Rose up to her hooves with her snout.

“What do we do now Tart? They probably heard the noise from the guns and add it together when these zebras don’t report back they are going to come looking for them so what do we do now?”

“Well we're going to have to gallop the rest of the way to the secret passage and pray to Celestia and Luna that the Zebra Remnant doesn’t know about it that’s about all we can do. I mean we're outnumbered”.

What she said was true because there was just two of us well three if you counted Rose, but she was just a filly she couldn’t do anything. “Alright Rose hop on up onto my back” I kneeled down onto the floor so that Rose could hop up onto my back.

Tart turned to me and said “Alright on the count of three we are going to gallop to the passageway”.

I nodded to her and and we took a stance to gallop “One...Two....Three! Gallop for it Frost!” Tart shouted to me and I started to gallop to the secret passageway with Rose on my back with her forelegs holding onto my neck so she wouldn’t fall off.

As luck would have it as soon as we made a gallop for bullets started to whizz past our heads but thankfully none of them hit us instead hitting the ground in front of us and pinging off the metal walls of the Stable. But I we didn’t get to safety before I got grazed on the shoulder by a stray bullet. It hurt but with the adrenaline pumping through my system I barely felt it.

We stopped when we reached the destination. “Tart are you sure this is where it’s at? I see nothing here just a wall, a plain boring wall at that”.

“Exactly Frost that’s what it’s supposed to look like. Watch this.” With that she typed something into her Pipbuck and all of the sudden the wall shimmered and a terminal popped up and out of the ground. Tart then typed something in the terminal and a door opened up. “Alright heres the passageway! Hurry up and get in before those zebras find us!”.

I trotted into the passageway as quickly as possible. Just because we lost them doesn’t mean we won’t get caught by them again. You know I figured it would be fancy inside but no it was just a regular boring tunnel with brownish grey rocks all over the place and brown dirt but dirt is always brown so yeah...

But anyways the tunnel wasn’t that long it took about ten minutes to get to the other side of the tunnel it had a terminal by the door to open it up the terminal was built by Stable-Tech same company that built the Stables themselves it had a green glow to it. Tart typed something in and it chirped in a robotic voice.

“Access granted”. It startled me out of my thoughts.

“Alright I don’t know if they are out there or not so get your gun out with your magic and be ready just in case they are out there since our EFS isn’t activated on our Pipbucks I can’t tell if they are”.

“Wait what’s EFS”. I asked with a confused tone in my voice.

“EFS it means Eyes Forwards Sparkle basically lets you see if there is anypony within a certain amount of miles, it also lets you see if they are friendly or hostile. Green means friendly, yellow is really in between the two, red as you guessed means hostile and that is shoot to kill”.

“Ohh that sounds really useful so why isn’t it activated?”.

“Because the only ones who have it activated is Security since they actually have a use for it in the Stable. Also there is SATS or Stable Arcane Targeting Spell it helps you target what you are shooting at”.

“Okay Rose we are going outside. You always wanted to go outside haven’t you?”

Rose shook her head twice “Yeah I always have Mom I bet it looks so cool out there”. She put a smile on her face. She was so innocent.

“Alright Frost I’m opening the door”. Tart said and I took my pistol out so it would be ready in case I needed to use it. Now I didn’t like the idea of killing somepony and I still don’t but sometimes you have to.

The door opened with a grinding sound that you get from metal that hasn’t been maintained. Well plus the fact that there was rust all over the door too probably the reason why really.

“Also Frost we don’t have a lot of ammo so make all your shots count!”.

The grinding sound finally stopped and the door was open and in front of the door were five zebras. When I mean were I meant it because I fired the whole magazine into them I only hit two of them judging by the screams I heard. I then jumped to the side to avoid the automatic fire that came immediately afterwards.

“Frost I’m going to try and override our Pipbucks with the Overmare’s code so we can use SATS and the EFS okay? Just keep them off of me it will probably take about five minutes”.

I poked my head out of the cover and fired two shots at the head of one of the wounded ones I could tell it hit the head because of the sickening wet popping sound it made and then went back behind the cover so I wouldn’t get hit.

“Alright Frost I got SATS and the EFS working all you have to do is think about using SATS and it should pop up. Okay?”

I nodded my head in acknowledgement to her and popped my head out of cover and thought about using it and a immediately time came to a standstill and a text message popped up in my vision.

“Welcome to S.A.T.S or Stable Arcane Targeting system.....”

I just scrolled through it because I don’t need to read it already know what it does. Plus who reads it anyways? Am I right or what?

Immediately the four zebras left were all highlighted in a green glow and percentages showed up the best percentage I could find was 80% so I selected that zebra four times. Then time restored itself and I fired the gun four times one of the shots missed, one went into his left foreleg and the other two went into his chest he immediately bled out.

Tart took care of the rest of the zebras. All her shots were targeted at the chests and heads of the three remaining zebras not one shot missed, never knew she was such a good shot.

“Tart when did you get to be such a great shot? Well I mean the original Tart she never liked guns, she never was a good shot either”.

“Well all of us chanelings are trained in firearms and before you go asking if I need your love to survive no I don’t. The Old World changelings did but us new changelings have evolved to be able to eat other emotions as well but love is preferable because it tastes sweet unlike fear and anger which have a bitter aftertaste to say the least”.

“Ohh I wasn’t really wondering if you could eat other emotions I was also wondering if you can eat pony food?”.

“Yes we can eat pony food as well but it simply has no taste”.

“What do you mean it has no taste?” I asked with clear confusion in my voice.

“Exactly what I said a changeling cannot taste regular food it’s just bland to us”.

“Wait you seriously cannot taste food? Man you're missing out I feel bad for you”.

“Got the same reaction from the other ponies in the Wasteland also you’ll get used to it trust me”. Tart said with a sigh and a roll of her eyes. “But trust me being able to eat emotions comes in handy never go hungry when there isn’t food around”.

“Well I never thought of it that way but now that you say it does sound useful”.

“Yes it is but now we need to get moving before more zebras come”.

I trotted out of the cave and into the main Stable tunnel exit and trotted up to Tart.

“Alright Rose you can hop off my back now since we are in the main tunnel”.

“Also Tart I have another question who is Xavier?”.

“He is the zebra who came to offer the deal to me I was on the verge of starvation what else was I supposed to do? He is the leader of the Trottingham Zebra Remnant Legion. I wouldn’t advise going after him if I were you right now because we are in no shape to go after him right now, nor do we have the supplies or weapons to get to him. Also I don’t even know where he is”.

Rose hopped off of my and onto her hooves. “I wonder what it’s like out there. I could get my cutie mark”.

“Also Frost take one of zebras assault rifles since you're a unicorn you can use them and grab some ammo also”.

I was appalled that Tart told to me to scavenge dead bodies. It’s bad enough that I had to kill them which I still thought was wrong. But now I had to defile the bodies? That was just wrong to me but things are different out there. So I reluctantly trotted up and levitated one of the zebra assault rifles into onto my back, then scavenged the bodies for some ammo. From the bodies I scavenged a little over two hundred rounds of 7.62×39mm rifle cartridges.

“Okay before we leave gotta shut the Stable door it will only slow them down because they will get out”. She got up and trotted over to the Stable door and there was another terminal by it. A cable popped out of her Pipbuck from the side of it and connected to the terminal. A couple seconds later with a hiss and jet of steam the cog shaped door shut.

“Alright it should take them a day to open that door without the proper commands or the terminal will lock them out”. I just nodded along to that because to be honest I was never good with computers not my specialty really. Just your average medical pony here.

“Alright Rose follow me and Frost do not wonder off okay? There is a lot of dangerous stuff out there like magical radiation”. Rose just had the typical filly reaction to that.

“Bu--” Rose tried to say but was cut off by Tart.

“No buts little filly it’s dangerous out there okay?”

“Yes Mooom okay” Rose sighed and rolled her eyes. Typical filly I tell you what.

We started to trot our way out of the tunnel took about twenty or so minutes. We trotted out of the tunnel and into a metro tunnel. A sign told me more specifically that it was the Trottingham metro station, the sign itself was in a state of disrepair. The metal it was made of was completely rusted and had green paint peeling off of it, well it must of been green ‘cause I’m color blind since my pupils are white.

The metro station itself was another thing it was in a state of severe disrepair. I could see that the tracks were not fit to be used by any locomotive and there was pony skeletons on the platform they probably didn’t even know what hit them. The roof to the building wasn’t in much better condition either, it was rusty in places, some parts collapsed or there was just holes in it. There was also a derailed train that had flipped on its side most likely flipped over because of the shock wave caused by the Megaspell’s detonation.

I felt myself gape at the site of it and sat there in a stupor for a couple of minutes until I finally snapped out of it by Tart talking to me.

“Hello anypony in there?” she said while waving a hoof in my face. “Good you were kinda zoned out there for a minute”.

“Wuuuu.... Oh sorry my bad just this place is huge it must of been filled with ponies trying to leave Trottingham when news of Cloudsdale got hit by a megaspell but looks like these ponies didn’t make it”.

“Yeah when everypony got the news that Cloudsdale was hit they all went into a mad rush to leave the cities in anyway possible but what they didn’t think about was that magical radiation doesn’t care if you’re in or by the blast the wind carries it and the fallout also that rained down”. Tart said while looking around probably for ammo or food.

“Yeah it must’ve been horrible knowing that everypony you loved and cared for all died”. I nodded too.

“You gotta remember that not everypony could get to a Stable only 100,000 lucky ponies go to them”.

I looked around the metro station one more time and decided that we should check the derailed train for supplies. “Hey Tart why don’t we check out the train it might have some supplies in it?”.

“Hey that’s actually a good idea Frost don’t know why I didn’t think of it there could be medical supplies or food on it”.

“Umm.. Why would there be medical supplies on a train?”.

“Trust me on this one out here in the Wasteland you can find the most unusual of things in places”.

“Okay let’s go check it out then”. I said as we started trotting towards the train.

As we started trotting towards the train we could see more damage that the metro station, there was also dead and scrapped ponitrons at random intervals. As we rounded a corner a working ponitron came into view in front of us.

“Halt! Show Trottingham Metro Station tickets or prepare to be exterminated you five seconds to comply!”

It scared the shit out of me and I think scared everypony else also but Tart picked Rose up and put her behind cover and I just realized that the ponitron was done counting down.

“Prepare to be exterminated!” it shouted and started spewing out 20mm rounds from its gatling gun that was on its right arm. I barely jumped to the side in time but didn’t escape unscathed though. Just as I jumped to the side two rounds hit me in my flank. It felt like somepony hitting you as hard as they could while also burning you on the skin and on the inside.

“Frost you okay over there?”

“No I got hit two times by it!” I said with pain in my voice there was also tears in my eyes from the pain.

“In your saddlebags there should be a roll of healing bandages and a vial full of Med-X”. I used my magic to open up my saddlebags and searched inside of them and found a roll of healing bandages and a vial of Med-X.

I jabbed the needle end of the Med-X into my shoulder and was met with instant relief of the pain I was experiencing. I then took the roll of bandages and put them on my flank they started to stop the bleeding but the bullets inside of me were still a problem they would have to come out at a later time.

I looked around for something to distract the ponitron with so we could take it out and what looked like a metal egg with a blue band on it and threw it at the ponitron. What I didn’t expect to happen was for it to explode in front of it, or for the ponitron to explode in a shower of sparks.

“Nice Frost where’d you find that EMP grenade at?”

“Uh what’s a EMP grenade?” I tilted my head in confusion.

“A grenade is an explosive that pull the pin on and it explodes there’s a bunch of different types most common is fragmentation basically it just explodes and showers shrapnel all over the place. An EMP or Electromagnetic Pulse is a wave of energy that kills any electronics close enough to the blast zone. Most commonly associated with Nuclear weapons of which were much more powerful than the Megaspells were but they were really rare since they use radioactive metals such as uranium or plutonium but the blast was much more powerful”.

“Oh just saw one laying around didn’t know what it was actually”.

“Are you sure that you’re okay? You lost some blood there plus it was your first time getting shot”.

“No I’m fine the Med-X is numbing the pain besides I have feeling that this going to be happening a lot out here”. I waved my hoof to her while saying it. “Anyways we need to check this train for supplies especially since I just used some of mine”.

“Alright when we are finished checking the train we need to find an exit from this building I don’t trust it for shelter”.

We started trotting towards the train again albeit a bit slower because of my injury I was limping a little bit.

Once inside the train I could see all the pony skeletons that littered the floor. Tart made Rose look away from them while we searched the the seats for anything we could sell for money. I found ten bottlecaps, one healing potions and also managed to find some preserved pre-war canned food. There was also a box of Sugar Apple Bombs. Although I was pretty sure those were stale by now.

“Hey Tart what did you managed to find?”.

“I found some more 9mm ammo for our pistols I would say about two magazines worth of it”.

“Nice find I just found some Sugar Apple Bombs, pre-war canned food, bottlecaps, four healing potions that's about it really”.

“Those healing potions will come in handy but only use them when you can’t use something else”.

Rose came up and she had something that she was carrying in her mouth.

“What did you find Rose?”.

“I dunno what it is something called Hydra weird name if you ask me”.

“Where did you find it at Rose? That will come in handy”.

“Oh where Frost found those healing potions”.

“Yes but Hydra is a very dangerous drug take it too much and your cells will stop healing your body without the drug plus it tends to make tumors and disfiguring growths”. I got weird looks from the both of them. “What I’m a medical pony I know this stuff”.

“Oookay then just remember from now on check your EFS Frost and use SATS as a last resort since the spell takes a while to recharge once you use it”.

I checked my EFS and there was only two dots on it and they were both green.

“Alright I didn’t see any other ponies here except for us”.

“Well then let’s get off this train we have to find the exit from this building as I said I don’t trust it”.

I trotted out of the train and back into the station with Tart and Rose we were right back where we were. I checked my Pipbuck for an exit from the station and found that the exit was on the right side of the building.

“Hey the exit is on the right side of the building”. I gesture with a hoof towards the right.

“How did you know that?” Tart asks with confusion.

“Remember the Pipbuck has an auto mapping feature on it?”

“Ohh yeah I totally forgot about that I guess my bad” she answered while blushing from embarrassment from forgetting that I mean she’s the Overmare after all. Well okay she’s not the original Tart gotta remember she’s a changeling now and that the original Tart died.

“Oh I have been meaning to ask but how long can you keep your disguise up?”

“Well I can essentially keep it up forever as long as I have the energy to do it that means I can’t starve”.

With that being said we started trotting towards the metro station exit. It wasn’t that long of a trot we go there in about a minute.

“You ready guys who knows what’s out there?” with me saying that I opened up the door to metro station and walked out of it and right into a camp of Raiders.

Footnote
Level Up!

Perk unlocked Wastelander

You are now are Wastelander you now know are starting to learn how to survive out in the big empty. Also you now know how to scavenge for food and other supplies.

Sorry for taking so long on this chapter plus I got rid of the level up thing from the first chapter didnt really like it but anyways chapter 3 will take a while also

Comments

[FireStorm2247]

The plot is definately becoming more and more interesting. However, I do have to say that sentence structure is a little off at times. There's plenty of places where commas and periods are needed. Other than that, this is an interesting read. Carry on, carry on.

[Deathpony]

1001148 mustache spike is indeed boss

[FireStorm2247]

You think so? Good, another for you.

[PMC]

You enjoy my fic, I read yours and GREATLY enjoy it.

[Fillyosopher]

Hey there. I admit that I haven't read very far, but from what I have seen the story is... fine. However, the previous comments on comma and phraseology are correct. Excuse my editing instinct, but I started in before I'd even finished the first paragraph.
Stable 30 example rewriting
Also, I'd point this out. Fallout Equestria has amazing environments and technology to describe. Indeed, the ponies in it live full lives, which include such everyday actions as teeth brushing and putting on clothes. However, unless these actions are important to the plotline, they can generally be ignored and left out of the story. Too much daily life can bore readers.
Also, look for way to avoid overusing "I". even contractions like "I've" and "I'd" can help break excessive use of this word. Find an example paragraph in Fallout Equestria of Littlepip talking about herself. Notice that the actions are not always in the form "I did X". Mixing it up is preferable.
Generally, Fallout Equestria is written in past tense. Present tense is only used for emphasis, and only in certain situations. Some people prefer it not be used at all. Every writer switches occasionally, which is usually caught by an editor. As you don't have an editor to catch this, insure you stay past tense.
Commas are important, but the rules are not as much. The easiest way to write with commas is to add them wherever you would take a breath while telling the story. While this isn't a perfect solution, it will help.
I haven't read far enough to comment on your plot.
I notice you are on the Compilation document. A suggestion: when you start your next chapter, post a link in the chat and invite everyone to comment as you write. You'll learn A LOT, very quickly (assuming you can grab a few people).

Now, I want to say this. If you are writing because you enjoy writing, and primarily for that reason, then feel free to ignore ANYTHING above that would make writing less fun. Seriously, just keep writing. But, if you are writing primarily because you love comments and want to see those comments turn into praise, then you may want to consider the above. Either way, GOOD LUCK! and keep writing!

[Deathpony]

1320141 yeah Ive been working on that the 2nd one is kinda better I hope so at least and the 3rd one Im working on still