Silver Glow's Journal

by Admiral Biscuit

February 4 [a poem]

February 4

How do ponies rhyme? How do poets? Do they sit at their desks all day long, picking one word and then another and another?

I didn't think writing a poem would be all that hard. I've read them, and had them read to me. I can write a couple of pages in my journal in maybe an hour or so—I don't really look at the clock when I'm doing it. I usually write a little bit right after I get up, and then fill in more later during my downtime in the day. That way, I don't forget stuff!

Since I couldn't figure out how to rhyme, I stopped trying. Emily Dickinson didn't rhyme, and neither did e e cummings, so it was okay if your poetry didn't.

Where do you go, cloud?
You drift across the sky,
Aimless.

Nobody directs you,
Nobody causes you to rain:
You're purposeless.

Those on the ground do not know you
They do not understand you
Like I do.

They marvel at your shadow,
They think of your shape,
They think you are a wooly sheep.

I know you.
I can touch you and feel you.
I can make you rain.

But I don't. I let you drift
Aimlessly
Bringing joy to those below.

It wasn't that great of a poem, and I was nervous to present it to the class. So many people in class were so smart, and I couldn't even write a proper poem. I bet any of them could have done it in a heartbeat.

I didn't have to, though. Conrad Hillberry smiled when he saw me, and then he said that we were going to read some Poe because this was the time of year when he felt the weight of years on his shoulders.

I was expecting something cheerful and lighthearted, so imagine my disappointment. Poe's poems are dark and gloomy. I think they are better November poems.

They were also captivating. I hadn't expected that. Poe had a way with words, and he used them to trip me up. It felt like there was almost a tempo, and then it was gone. Waves do that—they surge and recede. Maybe Poe liked the sea; maybe that's what inspired him.

After class, I presented my poem. I read it for Conrad (he said I can just call him by his first name), and then he had me read it for him again.

I had expected him to either tell me that it was terrible, or maybe tell me that I'd made a good effort, but instead, he leaned forward on his desk and folded his hands together. He said that it reminded him of a summer day when he was a young boy, and he was sitting with his high school sweetheart, and they were looking up at the clouds, watching them slowly sail across the sky like giant fluffy ships.

Then he asked me what the poem meant to me. I hadn't expected that! So I told him about what Lisa had said, and how it had made me feel.

He told me that he had been studying poetry for over fifty years. He had written a dissertation about e e cummings for his doctorate, and that he could tell me anything about the craft of poetry that I cared to ask. He said that even after all that time he had not lost his love of poetry, even though he knew it inside and out, and that there were two kinds of love and wonder. One was the ignorant kind, and that was the kind he had when he read the first poem which touched his heart. The other was the intimate kind, and that was the kind he had now. He thought that Lisa had the ignorant kind of feelings for the sky, while I had the intimate kind.

He said it might be no different than a child who had a crush on a classmate telling his parents that they didn't really understand love, since they'd been married for so long.

And then he told me that even with his vast knowledge of poetry, every now and then a student would surprise him and see something in a poem which he had never noticed before, and he said that I was one of those students.

So I thanked him, and I tore my poem out of my notebook and gave it to him and he thanked me for it.

Comments

[Doppler Effect]

He said that even after all that time he had not lost his love of poetry, even though he knew it inside and out, and that there were two kinds of love and wonder. One was the ignorant kind, and that was the kind he had when he read the first poem which touched his heart. The other was the intimate kind, and that was the kind he had now. He thought that Lisa had the ignorant kind of feelings for the sky, while I had the intimate kind.

I think I'd like to see Silver fly back up to play with the clouds with this thought in mind.

[Spectrumancer]

I don't think I could have summed up the different kinds of wonder better than the Prof does here.

[KMCA]

It wasn't that great of a poem,

You shut your filly mouth. It's a beautiful poem, your teacher even agrees.

[Conflicting views]

The poem was good. It lacked form, but it had a nice content. Good job!

[Celefin]

*sniff*
Thank you Dr Hillberry.

cloudappreciationsociety.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/VickHeart.jpg

[Archlyn]

He said that even after all that time he had not lost his love of poetry, even though he knew it inside and out, and that there were two kinds of love and wonder. One was the ignorant kind, and that was the kind he had when he read the first poem which touched his heart. The other was the intimate kind, and that was the kind he had now

This really resonated with me. After reading the last chapter I felt that Lisa maybe missed something because KNOWING something (like REALLY knowing all about it) doesn't neccasarily mean one can't wonder at it sometimes anyway. I think this was a great explanation

[Dinode]

She should read that poem to Lisa, see what happens.

I am wondering
If she would prefer haikus
Since they do not rhyme?

Speaking of which, are there any exchange students going to eastern countries like China or Japan?

[Blackdust]

That's too cute! *clutches heart and keels over*

[TheTownCrier]

To me it's all about perspective. And then someone comes along with a different perspective, a new light is shed upon it. It reinforces your passion or rather reaffirms and that is precious.

[goldfencer]

7080872
She might enjoy that.
Always loved a good haiku,
Simple. Elegant.

Had a lot of fun;
Haiku contest with a friend.
Is "wild" 1 or 2?

[Cold in Gardez]

So how did Silver learn English, anyway?

[Lord Legion]

I like her poem. Its not too overly descriptive. And one can tell she she wrote it with feeling. The way I see it, it's perfect.

[ScopeEva]

7079831 Yeah I get that (even if I don't know specifically what an ordained pastor is). I actually approve of it as realistic given her character but there's a difference between being in character and doing the right thing. Sheltering her from that knowledge was the wrong thing to do and it makes me a little uncomfortable knowing how it could turn out later. Still, it's a story and in terms of that it's a brilliant set up for interesting events further on.

I suppose congratulations are in order for brining out both my intrigue and my apprehension.

[Admiral Biscuit]

7081018
She killed an English teacher and ate his brain.

[Conflicting views]

7081108 And here I thought it was the hearth that allowed you to take your opponents' strenght...

[LuminosityXVII]

7081108

I very nearly did a real spit-take just now.

...

...I bet she had to blend it into a smoothie to get it down.

[SciGuy]

7080951
"Wild" only has a single vowel - it cannot have two syllables.

[Shachza]

7080951

You forgot the seasonal references.

[anon12]

7081018 I'm sure they had English courses in Equestria that the exchange students had to pass to qualify for the exchange program. The humans going to Equestria had to have passed Equestrian language courses too probably.

[goldfencer]

7081229
Tell that to my friend.
She claims it's pronounced why-uhld.
Regionalism?

…I'll stop now.

[FanOfMostEverything]

Great work with the poem and on the nature of wonder. And yeah, asking someone to write rhyming poetry in a language they only learned months ago would be downright cruel.

Also, Zecora would probably blow Silver's mind.

[Bugsydor]

7081369
Seconded. Those parts were beautiful, and a great way to wrap up the arc.

[Conflicting views]

7081335 I don't about english poetry, but in french poetry we are sometime allowed an "artistic licence" to add a syllable to a word. The reverse is also true and a word can be cut short from a syllable.
Maybe it is what your friend was refering to?

[SciGuy]

7081335
English has very few pronunciation rules that are more than vaguely reliable, but this is one that is almost without exception - a syllable needs at least one vowel. The only exceptions, to my knowledge, involve the -thm and -sm suffixes such as with the words rythm, chasm, and schism. Some dialects do pronounce things very uniquely, of course, but I don't see how one even could pronounce "wild" as having two syllables without simply pausing one's pronunciation during the "i".

[goldfencer]

7081405 Probably not. It was my haiku we were arguing about, not hers.

[goldfencer]

7081424 That's what I figured, too. I dropped it anyway; arguing with her about it wasn't really getting anywhere.

[MrZJunior]

As I understand it English is a very difficult language to rhyme in compared to other languages which might explain some of Silver Glows issues.

[Seirs]

7081108 and here I thought that was how Zecora got her ryhming mojo in Equestrian.

Funnily I can only ryhm really good when it involves the occasional chain of puns...

I loved the poem and the discussion with Conrad. That was perfectly said. I may have to quote it sometime.

[Alondro]

7080124 People keep responding.

[mastermenthe]

7081975
That practice is toxic to you.

[Emil]

7080853
Is this Admiral Biscuit's tribute to one of his old teachers?

[De Carabas]

7082981 Clearly, you chose the wrong setting. :)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Texas_A%26M_University

[Isshiki Kotonashi]

7082981 I know it's a fact, I live in Michigan too ;_;

[Admiral Biscuit]

7083065
Huzzah! Best state (even if our roads suck).

[Dan]

7083079

Better than Illinoisans, I'll grant.

Chicagoan urbanites are a disgrace to the Midwest. Their Pizza is awesome, though.

[Conflicting views]

7082941 She saw part of the country she didn't know, witnessed a cultural tradition, connecte further with some friend, had a meaningfull reflexion that ended into a small existential crisis...
Sure, her poetry class could give her a meaningful equivalant, but as far as experiencing what life in america is, she is getting more from the trip.

[MrZJunior]

7083003

Yes, we are. Although some younger city folk aren't, which I find odd. I've always owned at least two driveable cars, so that I have one for a spare if the other breaks.

I commute to work by bicycle and take public transportation most everywhere else. I drive maybe once or twice a week, which is probably a good thing because I almost invariably get lost.

[Flynt Coal]

7084003 Reports of my death were... *dramatic pause* greatly exaggerated.

You must be thinking of someone else...

static.tumblr.com/a363ceb3fae3869c8033b86604f7373a/guw84rp/vhJmlnvr5/tumblr_static_tumblr_inline_mih02o9mcz1qz4rgp.gif

[JentleJeniusKat]

7081405
7081424
7081457

It's a regional pronunciation thing. To quote the relevant entry from the Merriam-Webster Guide to Pronunciation:

\ī\ as in site, side, buy, tripe (IPA [aɪ, ai, ɑɪ, ɑi]). Actually, this sound is a diphthong, usually composed of \ä\ + \i\. In Southern speech, especially before a pause or voiced consonant, as in shy and five, the second element \i\ may not be pronounced (IPA [aː]). Chiefly in eastern Virginia, coastal South Carolina, and parts of Canada the diphthong is approximately \ˈə\ + \i\ before voiceless consonants, as in nice and write (IPA [ʌɪ]).
Many varieties of English do not allow \ī\ to be followed by \l\ in the same syllable. Speakers of such varieties will insert a following \ə\ which creates a new syllable. This is indicated by the transcription \ī(-ə)l\. For such speakers, file will rhyme with denial. Also, many varieties of English do not allow \ī\ to be followed by \r\ in the same syllable. Speakers of such varieties will transform the following \r\ into \ər\, thus creating a new syllable. This is indicated by the transcription \ī(-ə)r\. For such speakers, fire will rhyme with higher.

I've lived in Michigan for my entire life, and around here wild is pronounced with two syllables. It's not that one of the syllables doesn't have a vowel, it just has one that isn't written down. I suppose if English can have silent letters, it can have invisible letters too.

[Admiral Biscuit]

7080794

I think I'd like to see Silver fly back up to play with the clouds with this thought in mind.

We should live our lives every day with this thought in mind.

7080827

7080835

You shut your filly mouth. It's a beautiful poem, your teacher even agrees.

I was watching clouds drift by outside my window when I wrote it.

7080851
Rhyming and form are overrated. That's why I love poets like e e cummings so much: they broke out of the form. (Don't get me wrong, I enjoy structured poetry as well, but sometimes freeform feels more honest.)

7080853

Thank you Dr Hillberry.

7082046

Is this Admiral Biscuit's tribute to one of his old teachers?

It is. We never had this discussion, but he really made me enjoy poetry in a way I never had before, and one of his favorite poets is e e cummings.

7080864

This really resonated with me.

[Admiral Biscuit]

7080872

She should read that poem to Lisa, see what happens.

Maybe she will, in the future. Or, perhaps another poem.

I am wondering
If she would prefer haikus
Since they do not rhyme?

She might, at least for writing her own poetry. Although now that she's read e e cummings and knows that you don't have to have a rigid structure, she's possibly hopelessly corrupted.

Speaking of which, are there any exchange students going to eastern countries like China or Japan?

Yes. That's not likely to ever come up in the story, but there would be. Likewise, there would be students coming to nations on the Pony Planet that aren't Equestria.

7080892

To me it's all about perspective. And then someone comes along with a different perspective, a new light is shed upon it. It reinforces your passion or rather reaffirms and that is precious.

We're wonderful at fitting new things into our framework of knowledge and understanding, which is simply amazing. When my grandfather was a boy, he watched Confederate war veterans march in parades, and he lived long enough to see the first black man elected President. That's still hard for me to wrap my head around.

7081023

I like her poem. Its not too overly descriptive. And one can tell she she wrote it with feeling. The way I see it, it's perfect.

I think poetry is more about feeling than filling in details. It's like minimalist art.

7081102

Yeah I get that (even if I don't know specifically what an ordained pastor is).

Basically means that you went to divination school (or theology school, or whatever it's called depending on your religion), passed a bunch of tests, and are officially sanctioned by your church as a minister. Depending on your religious upbringing, I suppose it could be a great honor, or just a piece of paper that says you can legally perform weddings now.

I actually approve of it as realistic given her character but there's a difference between being in character and doing the right thing.

One of the great conflicts not only of fiction, but of real life as well.

I suppose congratulations are in order for bringing out both my intrigue and my apprehension.

7081292
7081018

I'm sure they had English courses in Equestria that the exchange students had to pass to qualify for the exchange program. The humans going to Equestria had to have passed Equestrian language courses too probably.

Yes, that's how they did it. Basically, the reverse of the Equestrian class that Silver Glow is helping with.

7081369

Also, Zecora would probably blow Silver's mind.

She presumably knows of zebra shamans, although it's debatable whether she's actually ever met one in the flesh.

Rap battles blow my mind.

7081405

in french poetry we are sometime allowed an "artistic licence" to add a syllable to a word. The reverse is also true and a word can be cut short from a syllable.

You can get away with that in English poetry sometimes. Things like o'er instead of over.

7081499

As I understand it English is a very difficult language to rhyme in compared to other languages

Probably any language which has regular endings for words is pretty easy. English? Well. . . .
boardofwisdom.com/cachetogo/images/quotes/180507.png

[Admiral Biscuit]

7081761

I loved the poem and the discussion with Conrad. That was perfectly said. I may have to quote it sometime.

You're free to. I actually often quote the 'freedom from' and 'freedom to' discussion from It's a Dangerous Business. One of the best explanations of freedom I've ever come across.

7083009

Clearly, you chose the wrong setting. :)

Nope; a small, Midwestern liberal-arts college is the best setting for Silver Glow. A&M's way too big. She'd get lost.

[almiok]

0.5 / 10

[BCB]

7101493 Will. You. Please. Stop. This was one of the best chapters yet. I'm getting really sick of seeing you on every chapter callously beating down on a work which someone has obviously put a lot of work into. At LEAST say why you don't like it, don't just say 0.0001/10 and a vomiting Pinkie.

[Drax99]

7103820 srsly, don't feed them. This story is amazing, this chapter was breathtaking. Praise it and ignore the neigh-sayers.
i.imgur.com/GPshdb3.png

[Admiral Biscuit]

7108401

srsly, don't feed them. This story is amazing, this chapter was breathtaking. Praise it and ignore the neigh-sayers.

I'm kind of having fun with it. Like, since there aren't any explanations besides x/10 and some number of sick Pinkies, I get to decide what 7101493 doesn't like. So far, I figure poetry and breasts. So clearly, the answer is a chapter with a poem about breasts, just to see how low the rating can go!

[Sunny]

7081108

So Sylar is inspired by ponies, then. Interesting.

[Ash Bark]

7101493 / 10

[Sweetblue]

Damn, this story almost makes me want to give poetry a try.

[arancaytar]

So far, her Poetry Prof is Best Prof.