• Published 20th Mar 2016
  • 3,378 Views, 88 Comments

Shadowbolts Adventures: The Chaos Lord - DragonShadow



Twilight Sparkle has a surprise waiting for her one day when she arrives home in the form of the Lord of Chaos himself. His presence seems annoying at first, but things aren't quite what they seem.

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Chapter 01: The Lord Cometh

Chapter 01: The Lord Cometh

"Oh my goodness, book two of Shadow Spade was probably one of my favorite books ever!" Twilight Sparkle allowed herself a little squeal as her arms wrapped around the backpack in her lap, clutching it tightly to her chest. "I can't believe I missed all of those clues! It was so obvious when I went back and read it a second time! A.K. Yearling really is a genius! And so multitalented! I hope I'm half as clever and creative as she is someday!"

Starswirl chuckled lightly with a tolerant smile on his lips. The bus was rolling along towards its destination, giving the two time to talk about their recent journeys into the world of fantasy, as they often did. They had nothing better to do, after all, and sharing experiences with a like-minded individual was a wonderful way to pass the time. "I can't say I've read it, but it's certainly good to hear that there are still creative authors out there."

"Oh, you should! Do you want to borrow my copy?" Twilight's hands darted into her backpack to hold the red and pink laced book up to the older man, who gave it a bemused glance.

"Thank you, but no. I still have a stack of books of my own to get to, one of these days." Starswirl watched her slide the book back into her backpack. "Perhaps someday soon I'll find time to get to it."

"I think you would like it. I know it may seem a little girly, but a good mystery is something anybody can enjoy!"

"I couldn't agree more, my dear." Starswirl nodded with an almost proud smile. "For now, however, it seems that we've reached your stop."

"Oh! Right! I'll see you tomorrow!" Twilight quickly zipped up her backpack and slung it over her shoulders before exiting the bus at her usual street corner.

She gave the bus one more friendly wave before turning to make her way towards home, her shoes click-clacking across the sidewalk with a light bounce in her step. Her steps began to slow however when she heard an odd sound behind her, not quite another pair of footsteps, just slightly out of time with her own pace.

Twilight looked back, and was puzzled to see a small coffee table sitting on the sidewalk. She was sure that hadn't been there before, but she did have a habit of getting lost in thought. She probably just didn't notice passing it. So she turned to march forward again towards home, only to this time hear an odd crinkling sound behind her.

She turned again. The coffee table was gone, and there was a garbage bag sitting on the sidewalk just a few paces behind her. Slowly Twilight backed away from the bag, but predictably, it didn't move. With a chuckle Twilight hit herself in the head with one hand. "What are you expecting, Twilight? Sheesh, you're just not paying attention."

Twilight turned to head home again, but she stopped almost immediately when a sharp scraping sound sent a chill up her spine. She whirled to see a rake lying on the pavement behind her.

This time Twilight broke into a run, ignoring her logical mind as she tried to leave... whatever it could possibly be, behind. But the sound of something thumping along the sidewalk behind her never faded into the distance. Glancing back she saw a pair of boots sitting inert on the sidewalk, then moments later a dead fish lying on the pavement, then the most mystifying of all, she saw a little raincloud sitting at the end of her driveway as she approached the door to her home, raining softly on the pavement.

Twilight darted inside and slammed the door behind her, her breath coming in ragged gasps as she pushed herself against it to hold it shut. "Wh... whu... Sunset... Sunset would know..." With her voice quaking, Twilight dug into her pockets for her phone, but what she pulled out was a pair of yellow eyeballs attached to a small paddle, which rolled around to stare up at her as she held it.

A shriek erupted from her throat as she hurled the object into the air, then raced to the staircase on the other side of the room, taking them rapidly toward her bedroom.

"Huh?" Spike's head jerked toward the door as she entered, slamming the door behind her. "Twilight? What's wrong?"

"I..." Twilight gulped. "I have no idea... it... it's-" Twilight shrieked again and fell to her butt against the door as the bedsheets suddenly jerked upwards, sending Spike hurtling through the air towards her. Twilight caught him in both arms, clutching him against her chest as she sheets lifted into the air, as if draped over something rising from her mattress. "Wh-wh-wh-what are you? You... you're not possible... you're not possible..."

"Anything is possible..." A powerful voice echoed from the bedsheets. "When you're an almighty nigh-omnipotent lord of chaos." Suddenly the sheets fell away with the sound of riotous laughter, and a strange creature materialized right in front of her, its goat-like head grinning around a single long, fang-like tooth. "Oh I am sorry, Twilight Sparkle! I just couldn't resist! You looked so innocent, and nothing is more tempting than the torture of the innocent!"

"I... I... I can't feel my feet..." Twilight's pounding heart seemed to be sucking all of the blood from her appendages. "Wh... wha...?"

"What are you...?" Spike finished for her from her arms.

"I am, as they say, a draconequus!" The creature lifted one forelimb in the shape of an eagle's claw, plucking Twilight's glasses from her nose to blow on them. The powerful gust of wind blew Twilight's hair clean out of her bun, and he placed the now spotless glasses on her face. "There you go, now you'll be able to see me better."

"D-Dracon..." Twilight couldn't even finish the word. "I've never... heard of..."

"Well you wouldn't have. There are none here, nor are there others in Equestria!" Discord cackled and began to bounce around the room on his long lizard's tail. "The wonderful thing about draconequus is that I'm the only one! Hoohoo!"

"Equestria?" Spike was the first one who recovered to speak. "I thought creatures like you couldn't come through the portal. I mean, obviously dragons can't."

"That's right..." Twilight was finally able to speak as her adrenaline began to wore off watching the strange, but so far non-dangerous, creature bounce around her room. "There's... there's not enough magic in this world to support your existence. How are you here?"

"Support my existence? Haw haw!" The draconequus busted into a hearty laugh, collapsing to the floor dramatically with a hand on his chest before suddenly reappearing leaning against the wall beside her. "I am not supported by magic, my dear..." he leaned closer, speaking in a whisper that sounded too low to hear, but which she somehow understood anyway. "I am chaos magic." He pulled back with a grin. "Wherever I go, it goes with me!"

"And... and why are you... in my bedroom?" Twilight asked. "F-for that matter... how do you know me and Spike...?"

"Oh I've heard all about your world from Princess Twilight." The draconequus cackled. "She loves to talk to anybody who will listen about... well, everything. I thought your world sounded relaxing, and being Twilight Sparkle yourself, I knew you would agree to let me stay here while I enjoy the sights and sounds of your world for a while."

"Hey, I never agreed to that." Twilight fell silent for a moment, then grumbled. "How long do you plan on staying, anyway?"

"I don't know, maybe a few days, maybe a few millennia." The creature shrugged and floated from the wall like a balloon in the wind.

"What!?" Twilight gasped. "You can't stay here forever!"

"Pffft, forever is such a mortal concept..." The draconequus chuckled breathily. "One or two millennia is suddenly 'forever'. Honestly, aren't you Twilight Sparkles supposed to be math geniuses or something?"

Twilight finally got enough blood flowing in her legs again to rise to her feet, cradling Spike in her arms to comfort him, and be comforted in turn. "You never even told me your name."

"Me?" The creature bent over backwards, his lips curling into a crooked grin that was somehow right side up despite his head being upside down. "Discord, the lord of chaos. A pleasure to meet you."

***

Lemon Zest's head was bouncing idly against her pillow in time with the tunes pumping from her headphones. One sock-clad foot was tapping against the bedsheets as the fingers of her right hand flipped the page of the magazine she was holding over her head. She was an active girl, a happy girl who enjoyed going out and letting her body groove to the sounds of life. But even she needed her quiet moments of zen every now and then.

Her moment of zen was suddenly interrupted however by a furry body flopping across her head, which was attached to a wagging tail and a panting mouth. Lemon Zest sat in the darkness for a moment, then threw her arms around the bundle of fur and pushed her to the pillow with a giggle. "Aw you wanna fight, do ya? Come on Li'l babe, you know you can't take me!"

Mina the dog yelped and swiped at her hands with her little paws, but Lemon was far too big and powerful for her to push away. It wasn't long though before the giggling smother turned into an affectionate belly scratch.

"Boy, have I been over-feeding you or what?" Lemon Zest giggled as her fingers scratched carefully into the rotund belly before her. "You're turning into a li'l fatso." Lemon giggled and scratched the dog's belly with a grin. "Who's the most adorable little fat girl on the planet? You are, oh yes you are." Mina leapt to her feet and jumped up eagerly to lick Lemon's cheek, drawing a delighted chuckle out of the teenager. "Haha, okay, okay, I'm getting up! We can go for a walk or something you fat little bundle of energy."

Mina leapt off the bed as Lemon Zest swung her legs off the mattress to stand up, but her foot landed squarely on one of her stress balls. She yelped as her butt hit the floor with a thud, and the ball went flying clear into the opposite wall, only to rebound and come flying straight back at her head.

Lemon Zest threw herself to the floor just in time for the ball to fly clean over her, but it bounced off of the rim of her bed, flew up to rebound off the ceiling, and came right back toward her. "Run, Mina!" Lemon Zest jerked to her feet and ran from the room with her dog yipping at her heels. She was sure she would be safe in the hallway, but somehow the ball flew from the room and began bouncing its way down the hall after her.

Lemon plucked her dog from the carpet and dove out of the hallway into the living room just in time to avoid the ball as it flew to the opposite wall, bounced off, and came after her yet again. Lemon Zest threw herself to one side and quickly scrambled underneath the coffee table in front of the couch, clutching her dog against her chest as she waited. At last, after bouncing for what must have been five minutes the ball came to rest right beside the coffee table, rocking to stillness on the carpet.

Lemon Zest squinted hard at the ball, half expecting it to spring to life again, but it remained as inert as a little ball should. "I didn't imagine that, did I, Mina?" Mina barked. "Yeah, I didn't think so... that was super weird... but at least it's over." Lemon carefully moved to crawl out from under the coffee table, but her palm landed on the ball and sent it flying straight into the couch, from which it rebounded and slammed right into her forehead with a little puff before falling to the ground again.

"... Ow."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. It wasn't very ha..." Lemon Zest halted and looked over at Mina, who had her head cocked and her tail wagging innocently.

***

The top rolled down and the wind in her hair, that was exactly where Indigo Zap belonged right now. The grin on her face as her convertible rolled down the highway was her favorite part of owning a car. Well, that and being able to get on the highway whenever she wanted. She wasn't even sure where she was going, she would probably stop at a food joint somewhere along the way, she just loved to spend a day every now and then seeing what this town had to offer that she hadn't seen yet.

Her hand reached down idly to turn up the volume on her radio to let In The End ring out across the city around her. Her head bobbed to the beat as her fingers rapped on the door. "I had to fall, to lose it all..." She sang under her breath.

A surprised yip escaped her throat when something slammed into the passenger's side of her windshield. A yellow splatter the size of her hand was spread out across the glass. "Ewe... bug guts..." Indigo grumbled and turned on her windshield wipers, hoping to clean the gunk off before it could dry on her car.

Once the gunk was gone she turned off the windshield wiper, but no sooner did she settle in again than another splat spread across her windshield, right in front of her this time. "What in Tartarus..." She wiped this spot off as well, but once that was gone another bug met its messy demise on her windshield. "What is this, some kind of infestation?"

She turned on her windshield wipers and left them on this time, but suddenly bugs began slamming into her windshield with the sound of a machine gun firing at her. She shrieked and jerked back in her seat, nearly letting go of the wheel as her view of the road suddenly vanished behind a wall of insect corpses. The car jerked back and forth across the thankfully empty highway until she slammed on the breaks, bringing it to a screeching halt on the shoulder.

With shaking hands she grabbed the door handle and lurched out of the car, dropping to her hands and knees to give herself a moment to relax. When she regained the use of her legs she pushed herself to her feet to march to the front of her car. Now what in the world was all that about?

She stopped, looking up and down in disgust and some awe when she saw the entire front of her car coated in bug guts as thick as yellow paint. From the top of the windshield to the bottom of the bumper, it looked like someone had taken a paint roller and gone to town on it. Indigo looked around her searchingly, but didn't see any other insects in the area. Did she somehow managed to plough right through one car-shaped swarm of bugs in the middle of the highway?

She shook her head and walked around to the trunk to pull out her squeegee. She needed to clean off her windshield if she was going to get anywhere... and maybe she would take it extra slow for the rest of the day.

***

"Pull!" Sour Sweet chucked a clay frisbee as hard as she could into the grassy field. The arrow launched from her left, flying through the air straight and true into the clay with more than enough force to shatter it into dozens of pieces that rained across the grass. Sour Sweet grinned and pumped her fist as Sonata Dusk leapt to her feet joyously beside her. Their hands met over their heads in an enthusiastic high five.

"Yeesh, Sonata! You are the best archer I've ever seen!"

Sonata hesitated a moment with her hands in front of her, then began to make a sign with her fingers. [Practice]

"I bet, you've had enough time." Sour Sweet held out her hand. "Okay, pro, it's my turn!" Sonata nodded and handed her the bow along with the quiver of arrows. Sour Sweet slung the quiver over her shoulder, then lowered herself to her knee the same way she kept seeing Sonata do. She pulled the arrow from her quiver and knocked it to her bow, aiming it towards the empty sky in front of her. "When you're ready."

There was silence for a moment, and suddenly Sonata's tongue clicked and she flung the frisbee out over the grass. Sour Sweet's arms twitched in the direction of the clay frisbee and let the arrow fly, but the arrow flew several inches wide. Her shoulders slumped with a grunt. "Gah, I guess I still need practice before I get as good as y-" she was cut off as the disc slammed into the side of her head and knocked her to the grass. "Gah! Goddessdamnit!"

[Sorry] Sonata signed quickly. [Okay]

"Yeah, yeah, I'm okay..." Sour Sweet rubbed the side of her head and sat up. "What the... did that thing really turn around and come back to us?" Sonata nodded with a quizzical look on her face. "Geeze, of all the rotten luck... let's try that again." She sat up on one knee and raised the next arrow to her bow, lifting it to the sky.

This one missed the disc in flight, and this time she saw it come back. It spiraled towards Sonata Dusk, who took it on the thigh despite trying to jump back away from it with a panicked yelp.

"Holy crap! Are you okay!?" Sour Sweet jumped up to put a hand on her hip to examine the damage. Sonata was rubbing the smacked area, but nodded. "Do you want to try another one? I don't want you to get hurt." Sonata smiled and gave her a thumbs up. "Alright, let's do it."

The next clay frisbee actually met with Sour Sweet's arrow in mid-air, but the arrow smacked the far tip and sent it spinning end over end back towards them, where it slammed straight into Sour Sweet's face and knocked her to her back on the grass.

When the blur lifted from the world she saw Sonata Dusk standing over her with her hands clasped over her mouth. "Let's call it a day..."

***

A more relaxing day Sunny Flare could scarcely imagine. Perhaps it was a sexist cliche, but she did love a nice dedicated day of shopping, and the multiple bags that swung from her fingers as she marched down the sidewalk had given her plenty of reason to chill out. She didn't even care if she looked like a silly girly-girl, she was just too happy and content... well, aside from the growing ache in her belly, which was quickly reminding her that she had forgotten to eat lunch.

She stopped in her tracks and glanced around. It took a moment for her to realize she had somehow wandered off-course, moving away from the usual market she spent her time in and into a somewhat shadier looking area. It didn't look dangerous, the people were still milling about the streets exchanging pleasantries on their way to continue their lives, but it still looked different. There were more risqué billboards, and more neon in the signs.

With a shrug Sunny turned towards the first building she saw that advertised itself as a restaurant, the Happy Cat Diner. It looked clean enough, and it specialized in steak, which was a bonus in her book. So she made her way across the street and pushed her way inside, where she was greeted by a smiling man in a formal tuxedo at the front door.

"Excuse me miss, may I see an ID?"

"Uh, ID?" Sunny blinked. "For steak?"

"Yes ma'am, it's the law, I'm afraid."

"Uh... okay..." Dubious, Sunny flashed her ID card without letting go of it. "Table for one, please."

"Right this way." The man led her into the main restaurant, where Sunny immediately understood why she had been carded. All of the waitresses were topless girls, though thankfully their shameless display ended there. They were also wearing blue-jeans and cowboy boots, with a few even sporting wide-rimmed cowboy hats. She had half a mind to storm out in protest anyway, but the mouth-watering smells from the kitchen changed her stomach's mind immediately.

The man handed her a menu and she slid into one of the booths near the kitchen. It wasn't long before a girl approached with a notepad and pen in one hand. She reached behind her to pull out a small white flag with a message written on it in neat script. I'm Adagio, and I'll be your waitress today. What can I get you? She flipped the flag around. And no, I don't speak.

"Oh, that's okay." Sunny smiled. "It's actually good to see that this place doesn't discriminate. You'd think a place like this would only hire girls with breasts. I mean, um... no offense..."

Adagio's eye twitched as she replaced the flag with another from her back pocket. If you harass me I can legally hurt you.

"No harassment! I'm sorry!" Sunny held up her hands disarmingly. Adagio put this flag away and took out the first flag again. "I'll take the barbeque simmered steak, well done." She held the menu out to Adagio, who took it with a nod and went straight into the kitchen.

"I'm on it already!" A familiar voice preceded a familiar face emerging from the back, pushing the door open with her hip as she carried two large trays out into the restaurant on her fingertips. She froze when she saw Sunny, staring straight at her as Sunny looked her over with a stunned look on her face.

Sunset Shimmer cleared her throat awkwardly. "Well, shit... what are the odds of this...?"

***

The Happy Burger was fairly busy at this time on a Saturday, with lots of loud chatter and clamor from the kitchens. It was easy for Sugarcoat to sit quietly in her booth with her dark sunglasses and pitch-black wig, tapping a pen on her small notebook while she discreetly examined the booth on the other side of the room. Their old nemesis from Crystal Prep, Sunset Shimmer, was speaking to another girl she didn't know, who had dark skin and snow-white hair cut into a bowl-shape around her head. It was the first time Sugarcoat had caught her talking to someone outside of school... at last, progress was being made.

Unfortunately, the clamor also made it impossible to hear what they were saying, and soon Sunset Shimmer and the second girl tossed their garbage into the can and left. With a grunt Sugarcoat whipped the sunglasses off of her face to replace them with her normal glasses. It was alright, a real detective was nothing if not patient. For now, she had a meal she had purchased to blend in that had gone to no use so far.

She pulled the wrapper off of her hamburger and took a bite of the cardboard-like substance within. She had been eating burgers like this since she was a kid, though, so she didn't mind it too much. As she chewed she noticed there was a small sticker on her wrapper that said 'Pull Me And Win A Free Meal' in bold letters. Even coming here as long as she could remember, Sugarcoat had never won such a promotion.

That didn't stop her from trying though. She ripped the small tag off of the paper wrapper and found with an amused smile that she had finally won.

Holding the torn tag in front of her like a precious relic, she approached the employee at the register. "Excuse me good sir, I seem to have won something."

"Ah, congratulations!" The man gave her a broad smile after examining the tag. "Here you go, enjoy your free burger, and remember to tell everyone where you got it!"

"Considering it's written on the wrapper I don't think it'll be hard for them to tell." Sugarcoat noticed that this burger too had the contest tag on it. She tugged this one off, and almost fell over when this one, too, was a winner. "I'll take one more!"

"Wow! Nice!" The man handed her another burger. "This must be your lucky day."

The tag came easily off of this wrapper as well. "Yes... yes it is." She turned the tag around to show the employee that this one, too, was a winner.

"Okay, that... that's just getting weird now. Heh... but congratulations, though." The man handed her the next burger.

Sugarcoat handed the winning tag back again. "Keep 'em coming."

The man squinted at her. "Are you sure you're not cheating?"

"What? You saw me rip the tag off right in front of you. If I was that good at sleight of hand I'd be in Las Pegasus making the big bucks."

"You realize this crap will kill you, right?"

"We all die someday," Sugarcoat countered. "And if I choose to die full of cardboard burgers, you have no right to judge me for it. Now you have a prize to give me."

***

Twilight Sparkle opened the door moments after the bell rang and Lemon Zest sprang inside before it was even all the way open, knocking Twilight into the living room. "Gah!"

"Twilight! Oh my Goddess Twilight, I can't believe it!" Lemon Zest twirled in place, then held Mina out to her with a bright grin. "Say hello!"

"Um... hello?" Twilight wiggled her fingers in greeting.

"Hello!" Mina exclaimed back.

"What the... but she can't..."

"She can now!" Lemon Zest squealed. "Maybe Spike's magic is rubbing off on her!"

"I didn't rub anything off on her! Honest!" Spike skidded into the room from the back hallway, his expression full of panic. He turned bright red when he saw the looks of confusion on the two girls. "Oh... o-oh... I... what's going on?"

"Spike!" Mina squirmed in Lemon's arms until she plopped to the floor and ran to Spike, licking at his face eagerly. "Hi Spike! Hi!"

"Mina!?" Spike exclaimed in shock. "Y-you... you're talking?"

"Isn't it wonderful!?" Lemon Zest squealed. "When I heard that I just couldn't resist bringing her to our get-together! I hope you don't mind, Twi."

"Of course not. This is... this is remarkable." Twilight approached the two dogs and knelt down to scratch Mina behind the ears. Her mind was working quickly, sorting through variables that may have changed recently... and in the end she reached only one key variable. "Discord... he must have brought more magic with him from Equestria than I realized..."

"Who?" Lemon Zest cocked her head. Their conversation was completely derailed however when a pair of large white bags plopped down on Twilight's coffee table, seemingly full of burgers. "Holy cow, Sugarcoat!" Lemon gasped. "Why would you buy that many burgers!? It would take less than half of that to feed all of us!"

"I didn't." Sugarcoat shrugged. "For today, at least, a winner is me. I just couldn't stop winning burgers after I stopped for lunch."

"That's... frighteningly unlikely." Twilight noted.

"Speaking of unlikely, you should've seen what happened to me before Mina started talking to me." Lemon whirled on Twilight. "I was being attacked by one of my stress balls! It kept bouncing off of things and flying at my head! Over and over and over! It was completely ridiculous!"

Indigo Zap walked in just then, one of her eyes twitching and her arms hanging limp at her sides. "Oh no, not you too!" Twilight exclaimed. "What happened to you?"

"I was almost run off the road by bug corpses..." Indigo shook her head blankly. "It was like a mass suicide. Colonies and colonies of flies."

"Do flies have colonies?" Lemon asked curiously.

"You can find out with the new invention of the internet." Sugarcoat approached Indigo and held out a burger to her. "Here, something to help calm you down."

"Ugh, I'd rather eat the flies..." Indigo recoiled from the burger with her hands on her stomach.

Sour Sweet was grumbling darkly as she marched into the living room with her hand on her head. "Are we having a party in here? Why wasn't I invited?"

"You were. Isn't that why you're here?" Sugarcoat pointed out.

"Oh... right." Sour Sweet shook her head. "Ugh, sorry, this has just been-"

"A weird day?" Twilight asked. "What happened?"

"I kept getting hit with clay pigeons. It was like they were divebombing me on purpose! And I got hit with three baseballs, two soccer balls, and an acorn from a fucking tree on the way over here!" She groaned with a hand on her head. "I have such a headache right now..."

"There, there." Sugarcoat patted her shoulder and held a burger under her nose. "Have a bite and try to relax."

Sour Sweet glared at the burger for a moment like it had wronged her before suddenly snatching it out of her hands, ripping the wrapper off, and tearing into it hungrily.

"Oh geeze..." Indigo looked up as Sunny Flare entered the room with a strangely distant look on her face. "What's your story of the day?"

"I... don't really want to talk about it." Sunny's cheeks flushed pink.

Twilight put a hand to her chin as her eyes wandered back to the dogs who had taken to cuddling on the floor. Spike looked positively ecstatic, mumbling quietly into Mina's ear, and actually having her able to respond. She wasn't sure she had ever seen him so happy. But regardless, one thing was crystal clear...

Something weird was going on here.

To Be Continued

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