• Published 12th Jun 2012
  • 12,807 Views, 314 Comments

Harmless Shenanigans(?) With Princess Luna - Bigwig6666

After some pressure from her sister, Princess Luna decides to join up for a dating website in order to meet a nice pony and settle down. Who she finds, however, has more in common with her than you would think.

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Seven - A Momentary Loss Of Muscular Coordination

Lulu looked terribly confused as she sat next to Luna during the ceremony for whatever it was passed.

"So what's this about?" she whispered for what felt like the hundredth time.

Luna rolled her eyes and facehoofed. "It's the royal banquet planning. Now hush," she said crossly.

Lulu puffed out her cheeks and sank back into her chair as the noble spewed on about some rubbish about god knows what.

"And further more," the stuffy noble said, his voice rising above the others. "Princess Luna should not allow a guest, an alien no less, to wander the castle freely. She should be quarantined and examined for any unknown diseases."

Luna bolted upright. "What did you say?" she growled.

The noble gulped and attempted to salvage anything of what he had just said. "I meant that - gaak!" he cried as Luna made a dark purple ring of magic form around his skinny neck..

"I find your lack of personal safety disturbing. You do not speak about Lulu that way, understand?" she growled menacingly.

"Ye-esss," he mumbled and struggled for air.

"Enough. Luna, release him," Celestia commanded and slammed a hoof on the table.

"As you wish," Luna snarled and removed the magic glow from around his throat. "Come on Lulu. Let's leave these close minded idiots to their petty squabbles." she muttered and stormed out the room.

Lulu looked around. "Sorry," she mumbled and went after the princess. "Hey, hey, hey..." she murmured as she caught up with her friend. "What was that about?"

Luna sniffed and allowed a single tear to roll down her cheek. "Sorry, it's just you're my first friend and ponies just shun you like they do me."

Lulu put her hands on her hips and wiped the tear away with the sleeve of her new sweater. "You don't have to care what they say about me. I don't. People on Earth would always say mean things about me, just for being different.

Luna sniffed again. "Really? Why didn't you tell them otherwise?"

The human shrugged and put an arm around the pony. "Beats me. They just did and I lived with it."

Luna pulled away from her and walked forwards a few steps. "So... you just ignored them? I wish I could do that." she muttered.

"Why don't you?"

"Because being a princess, one has responsibilities to uphold. Even if her subjects hate and despise her." the princess replied and sniffed again.

"Oh you don't know that," Lulu said and waved a hand as she walked past the princess.

"Yes I do, actually," Luna muttered darkly and faced her friend.

"No you don't." Lulu replied and and raised her voice slightly. "Look, the point is, Luna: if you're going to sit here in the castle and mope all day, then at least have fun doing it."

Luna tilted her head. "What do you mean?"

"Here, I'll show you," Lulu giggled and took the princess's wing in her hand. "First: we get some snacks. Take me to your kitchen again, please," she said and blushed. "I've forgotten the way again."

Luna chuckled and led her friend to the kitchens again.

"Hello, girls. What can I help you with this time?" Mr Floop said cheerily as they bustled into his kitchen again.

"Hello, Floop, Lulu has a plan of sorts." Luna said and smiled at the chef pony.

"We need candy. And drinks. Lots of them," Lulu said, grinning like mad.

Floop chuckled. "Alright, here," he said and withdrew a large tub of sweets. "But take it easy on them, too many and you'll get a stomach ache. And these," he smiled and filled up two large cups of milky substance.

Lulu nodded. "I know, I've heard that speech before. Thanks Mr Floop." She smiled and took Luna's wing in her hand again, while placing the tub in between her wings and carrying the drinks in her hands..

"I hope you know that this isn't very dignified," Luna grumbled as they marched. "Where now?"

"Your room. We pull an all-nighter."

Luna cocked her head and Lulu sighed in an exasperated manner. "Video games," she deadpanned. "Maybe other stuff, we'll see."

"Oh." Luna said and allowed her face to break into a grin. "I could do that. But what does that have to do with moping?"

Lulu tapped her nose playfully with the end of the cup. "Because, my dear princess, it helps when we lock the door and ignore everything else."

Luna's eyes widened at the suggestive tone in her voice.

Lulu giggled and skipped along. "C'mon. Race you."

Luna started cantering after her, laughing and smiling all the way, until they reached the princess's room.

"Close the curtains, lock the door, and I'll set everything up." Lulu chuckled as they panted for breath, having sprinted the final flight of stairs.

"Alright." Luna nodded and floated the tub of sweets to the table and enveloped the curtains in a dark glow.

"Ahhh! Too dark!" Lulu's voice cried in the dark as Luna heard a small crash.

"Oh what did you do?" she asked and re-opened the curtains.

"Nothing. Just fell over." Lulu blushed and picked up a tin of sweets and placed it next to the tub of sweets they'd retrieved from the kitchen. "Hang on, where'd the tin come from?"

Luna laughed. "Oh that. I've always got a secret stash hidden somewhere. Never know when you're going to need some sweeties late at night."

Lulu looked at the tin and peered in. "Chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate." she murmured and looked up at Luna. "Luna are you a chocoholic?"

"Oh come off it. From one tin of sweets?" the princess laughed and levitated a small bar out and plopped in in her mouth.

"I already saw the twelve candy bars in the fridge," Lulu deadpanned.

Luna's grin faded. "Alright I might be, what's it to you?" she said suspiciously.

The human placed the tin down and put her hands on her hips. "Nothing. Just remember to share with your best friend." she giggled and batted her eyelashes, leaning over to her lovingly. "Unless you want me to leave?"

"No!" Luna cried and made poor Lulu jump. "I mean... no... I'll share," she murmured bashfully.

Lulu patted her on the back. "It's alright, I didn't mean to make you sad," she said awkwardly. "I love being here."

Luna nodded. "I know. Sorry for making you make me feel bad," she said.

The girls looked at each other slowly. Then burst into a giggle fit.

"Ooh. I know. Let's get some music too," Luna said excitedly as they closed the curtains after putting the drinks in the small fridge the princess had under the table on the far side of the room.

"Good idea," Lulu nodded her head, just as eagerly.

Luna trotted over to a dresser beside her bed, and Lulu peered over her shoulder secretly and couldn't help but notice a pair of socks scrunched up. She raised her eyebrows in surprise and said nothing.

The princess fumbled around in the drawer for a few minutes and pulled out a small iPod.

"Really? They exist here too?" Lulu asked as she gobbled down some sweets.

"Mhm. Now what do you want to listen to?" Luna responded and flicked through some songs.

Lulu shrugged. "Surprise me."

Luna nodded. Oh I will. she thought with glee as she chose shuffle, allowing some Iron Hayden to play (When The Everfree Wind Blows) for now.

The girls sang and danced around for a while before they settled down on their pillows. "OK, so which game first?"

"Hmmm," Lulu murmured as she ran her finger along the games Luna had: "Haylo, but we've already played that, Uncharted 2: Beyond Ponies, Ponymon: Gotta Friend 'Em All: Colosseum (heh, we may have to play that later just to see what it is), Super Smash Bronies Brawl, Grand Theft Carriage: Las Pegasus, Marevel Vs Capcolt 3, Stable 2, Mare Effect 1, 2 or 3, Super Mareio Sisters..." she read off, including many others, but the puns be too great for my poor brain, so I shan't name them all.

"Let's play... Ponymon," she decided. "Actually, it doesn't matter where we begin, we've got all night to ourselves." she giggled and took another drink of milkshake, not noticing the joke she'd just made.

Luna did however, and turned bright red again. "She keeps making all these jokes... does she want me to do something?" she wondered as she watched Lulu operate the Neightendo Manecube delicately. "You act as if you've used a Manecube before. Do they have them on Earth?" she asked.

"Yeah. Except they're called Gamecubes. Very strange name I know. I half expected them to be called this as a joke, but then they actually went with it and I was like: ''well I'll be damned''," she laughed.

Luna laughed and bopped her head as a song about Raspawtin came on, the mad monk of the sphinx lands far to the west. But she couldn't stop watching how the human's hair moved, much like her own. "Beautiful..." she murmured, just barely over a whisper that would give Fluttershy a run for her money.

"OK, so how do you use this thing?" Lulu asked and picked up the controller for the Manecube. It was quite different from Gamecube controls on Earth. For one, it was shaped like a hoof. Need I say more?

"Here," Luna showed her how and played the tutorial for her.

"Ohhh right. I got it now. It's just the controller that looks different, not the controls. Gotcha," Lulu giggled and began playing.


A few hours and a few smuggled beers later, the girls were well on their way to Boomtown in the Ponymon universe. "Alright now what you have to do is..." Luna explained, having finished this game already. She'd finished all the games she had already. One thousand years of utter boredom drives someponies to extreme lengths of depression, where all they can do is play video games and drink themselves into a stupor.

After being beaten by the boss at the end of Boomtown several times, they decided they would play something else.

"Oh, how about Marvel Vs Capcolt now?" Lulu asked. "Me V you? Luna e Luna?" she giggled, remembering that her name was indeed Luna, just nicknamed Lulu here in Equestria.

Luna nodded. "You're on," she giggled and picked up her own controller, content with playing against her friend.

Strangely enough, MVC 3's characters consisted of ponies from Equestria: Spitfire, Twilight Sparkle, Trixie. Even the two princesses, as well as characters from their own respective franchises.

Lulu chose her team: Trixie, Megamare and Spidermare, while Luna chose hers: Soarin', Captain Equestria and Manegeto.

"Let's do this." Luna grinned at her friend, who grinned back and hit ready.

The battle raged for ages. Hours at the very least.

Eventually, Luna was down to her last character, the captain no less. She wiped her forehead free of the sweat from the adrenaline of the game.

"Ready to quit?" Lulu grunted and drank some more beer, burping loudly and nudging the pony next to her.

"Never! Never surrender!" Luna cried defiantly. "Nevah surren'ah!"

"Your funeral, little miss princess," Lulu chuckled.

"Try me, little miss human," Luna giggled back as the final round began.

"OK here we go," Lulu murmured and bared her teeth in frustration as Captain Equestria knocked Trixie out. "Great and powerful, my little toe," she muttered as Spidermare popped out, web slinging herself at the star-spangled hero.

Down to the last little smidgen of health, the timer ran out.

Luna closed her eyes and took a deep breath, then slyly opened one eye and smirked at the frustrated human. "Problem?" she asked.

Lulu pouted slightly. "How are you so good as Cap?"

Luna shrugged and giggled. "Don't know. Want another drink?"

"Nah I'm good. One of us has to stay sober to keep the other from kissing us again," she giggled.

Luna sighed. "I told you, that was just a one-time thing, I didn't mean to do it. Now can we please drop the subject?"

Lulu raised her hands defensively. "Alright, you just 'fell' onto my lips is that it?" she teased and stuck her tongue out. "Want another one?" she said and made smooching noises, turning the poor princess as red as the fields of roses outside the Dark Tower.

Luna tried to shove her away jokingly, but Lulu must have moved slightly, for the princess actually did fall towards the human, and their mouths locked for a second.

Both their eyes went wide as they struggled out of each other's grasp, realizing they were actually clutching each other intimately.

Lulu picked the princess up and flopped her on the bed, their lips still locked and their tongues working against each other, vying for control over one another in dominance of the mouths.


They lay on the bed, dozing slightly under the covers.

Lulu stirred and rose slightly, stroking Luna's blue fur softly. "Oh god am I a furry?" she wondered with a sudden fear. "Ah screw it (tee hee). I just sexed with a horse and it was goooood. I don't care," she decided, and laid her head back down.

Luna woke as well and looked at the human in her bed, running a silky hoof down her arm. "Hi," she murmured, smiling softly.

"Hi," Lulu grinned back and kissed her nose. "Now that time, you did fall on me," she chuckled.

"No," Luna said sternly, yet soothingly. "That, my dear... was a momentary loss of muscular coordination."