• Member Since 19th Nov, 2015
  • offline last seen Jun 5th, 2020

Dimensional Librarian


Storing knowledge and stories slowly churning some out into semi readable works.

T
Source

In the Ancient land of Alvinailey is a lone Dragon Ranger by the name of Shobbit O'Gale. In his hunt against all dragons of his world he winds up in Equestria due to the powerful magic of the Dragon Emperor of his world. Now with no quick and easy way back Shobbit must learn to be accepted by the ponies of Equestria as he searches for a way back the only way he knows how. By hunting Dragons!!!

Cover art from Here! At least that's what Google says:pinkiehappy:

Chapters (10)
Comments ( 40 )

He can break the sound barrier by jumping? AWESOME!

Wow, a Chinese Dragon? AWESOME!!!!

6963104 Lolz You doing Okay Dylan? Or do I need to tone this down a bit?

6963116 Nope, keep the awesomeness up! Congratulations, I don't normal get like this, unless something is truly awesome (like the Hobbit!)

dimtec can you continue this i like Shobbit

6971409 I'm almost done with the next chapter

Why can't i give a like more than once?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

6973320

I am one of these Rangers and I have no dragon any longer. My name is Shobbit O'Gale and I killed my dragon master and am now able to write this journal and work on correcting what evils I was forced to do. I will also try to save the others and if I can't I will stop them from bringing further harm."

The concept is interesting. Even though there are a few clichés here and there through the story-line, (some weird monologues, and rushed scenes) you may be able to develop a quite peculiar setting, if you explore this side of your character. I mean, he answers to no dragon anymore, he's free to do whatever he wants - unlike the others of his kind.

So far I have only read the first chapter, but I wouldn't give up on this story. I've also read part of your first story, and since then your writting skills have truly improved.

6973339 Thanks I really am trying on improving my work. I also plan on actually writing his actual story and make it a novel but I know it needs some serious work before then

6985368 He's killed 14 billion dragons and can access any of their powers

6985376 14 billion? That is a lot of dragons!

6989966

Pierdolić the homework

I think that this need meme or something xD

6991743 If you provide the image I'll use the photoshop at my school and make it a meme for ya:pinkiehappy:

Well if your going to include Ember then you by canon-law you have to include Starlight Glimmer and Trixie ...just sayin

7154350 They will be showing up later and this is actually set Mid Season 5

Ooh goodie ...
Well now with his sister here Celestia has someone that can keep him in check ... :trollestia:
Although how others will react is still unknown
Don't tell Twilight about the multiverse ...:twilightoops:
Ermergerd Rarity Spaz out faint once she sees Terra O’Gale the Goddess of Creation. :raritystarry::raritycry:
or Discord starts hitting on her ...and Shobbit keeps trying to kill him half the time ... Lol yes
And Flutters is mad/sad bc she's trying to steal away her draconequus ..:fluttercry:.:flutterrage:

7154417

So you're liking this as much as Me? I see.... I love that Illua Character by the way:trollestia:

7154417 Lolz Yeah if Discord hit on Terra Shobbit would let her take care of it. :derpytongue2:

You said Chinese Dragon? Does this mean the reader is to assume that O'Gale comes from Earth-Earth or another universe entirely and you meant to say 'wingless serpent dragon'?

Comment posted by Dimensional Librarian deleted Sep 13th, 2016

7559970 Thanks for pointing that out I should probably change that now that you mention it XD

And as you can see my writing is sh*t

I felt compelled to call this character egregiously over-powered, but if he is old enough to have slayed literal billions of anything (just counting to ONE Billion being a feat that would take a regular man roughly 32 years) that would make this man inordinately old, wise, and powerful, which works quite well with the very no-nonsense, job-orientated way you've constructed him.
However, you really do need some work with your verb tenses as well as showing rather than telling, and if you were only to pick one, I would rather heavily suggest the latter.
That said, there's a certain sense of whimsey to your story that I find decidedly intriguing.

7560417 Thanks and I know that I need to work on showing over telling.... I thought I was taking a creative writing senior English class but turns out it's a "Let's write college essays" kind of class.

Before I read it, what is the Gore tag for ?

7856629 For a later part in the story where I will be writing out many a brutal death

Vinyl asked with a grin before she disappeared.

:pinkiegasp: NOOOOOOOOOOOO........

7953730
..........no,somehow I missed it......how?

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