• Published 8th Mar 2016
  • 2,126 Views, 107 Comments

We Three: Hebi No Onna - Eyeswirl the Weirded

Adagio Dazzle has snake-arms. Also; weird things happen.

  • ...

Chapter 7: Struggling with Snake-arms!

Adagio and Sonata were awoken by the sounds of Aria screaming and thrashing, along with a voice.

"Good morning, Master!"

It was Suri, the first servant they'd found after Lemon. She was sitting on her knees by the bed, perfectly still as she smiled adoringly at her conjoined queens, even as one of them continued to shriek and stammer.

"-waited for us like a goddamn shark! St-staring, until we woke up, we hypno'd a serial killer! She's gonna-oof!" Aria's manic muttering was cut off when Sonata headbutted her. "...Thanks. Needed that."

"Any time!"

Still getting her bearings, Adagio addressed Suri herself. "Was there something you wanted?"

Suri smiled wider. "Only to fulfill your every whim, Master!"

"...How long have you been waiting there?"

"A little over two hours." She sighed dreamily. "Two wonderful hours..."

"She watched us sleep," whispered Aria through clenched teeth and a worried expression, "they watch us sleep now!!"

Adagio spared her a glance before looking back at Suri. "Go prepare us a meal."

Suri happily shot up, then stumbled and fell on her face as a result of two hours spent sitting on increasingly rubbery legs. She got up again and headed to the kitchen at a more controlled pace, leaving the sirens alone.

Eyebrow raised, Adagio held her arms where she could look them in the eye. "Did either of you, at any point, suggest, hint, imply, or otherwise implant the idea that you wanted her to be there when we awoke?" Two head-shakes. "Then do you see what I was worrying about yesterday?"

"Yea, sure," said Aria, hoping to skip the I-Told-You-Idiots part this time, "so how do we get 'em to not do that anymore?"

"A simple order not to do it should suffice, but that won't prevent future surprises." Standing up, Adagio paced over to the table on which the enchanted book had been left. "I'll look through this until they bring us the day's first 'guest,' see if there's something we overlooked the first time." She stared at the tome in silence for a moment, glanced around, and sighed. "As soon as I find a servant that isn't making us breakfast..."


Reclining in the big, comfy chair again, Adagio nodded for the servant kneeling in front of her to turn to the next page while Aria and Sonata were fed by two others. When she finished up her cinnamon rolls, Sonata turned address to their host.

"Hey, Dagi? I've been thinking. You don't like it when boys touch you, which is why we've got Hernando over there-" she nodded to a tall, tan, muscular man gently fanning them with a giant leaf, procured from parts unknown, "...me likey. -keeping his distance, but you totally touched a buncha guys during our first song in CHS. Wuddup with that?"

"It was part of our routine," she answered with an irritable arch of an eyebrow, "the one that, frankly, I'm a little annoyed you two hardly bothered with. We were low on energy and needed every edge we could get, so needing to wash my hands after was a small price to pay if it bolstered our chances of bewitching the population. On that note, why is it that all I saw either of you two do was strum Flash Sentry's guitar once?" She couldn't stay angry when Aria made an adorable shame-face, but Sonata grinned.

"Well, I would'a strummed a little more, but we were kinda in public, so-"

"Gah," interrupted Aria as she flushed crimson, "T.M.I., Sonata!!"


As a servant set down her cup on the little table in the middle of the room, Adagio smiled. "Thank you both for joining us for tea."

The young couple; a pale man with blue hair and a pink woman with long hair of a few shades of pink, as well as odd, yellow stripes, both smiled back at her as they answered in unison.

"It is our pleasure, Master."

Though she was getting tired of repeating her very specific orders ("Don't watch us while we sleep" having been added that morning) to each and every new slave, the ring of 'Master' still tickled her. She remained seated even as the couple got up and left to covertly follow her commands, walking away hand in hand. Adagio looked at her own 'hands' to again find one giving the departing couple a particularly intense stare.

"Aria? I'm starting to worry about you."

"Wh-wha?! I, who, what?!"

Sonata looked a little worried too. "Dagi has the stare thing all figured out, you don't need to do it too."

"I wasn't!"

"Alright," Adagio asked with an inquisitive eyebrow, "then what were you doing?" No answer. She exerted control to keep her right arm from looking away, adding an edge to her voice. "Aria?" She tried to stay focused even as Aria sheepishly tried to turn her head, again lighting up with the most adorable blush.

"Th-they... they were, holding hands." Two deadpan stares. "It's weird! Nobody did it even in some of the nastier places back home, where the currents or something big and fast might snatch someone up in a flash, but here? There ain't even any wind strong enough to pick someone up, s-so why do it?! Stupid humans."

Adagio chuckled. "I suppose I see where you're coming from, but it's almost definitely one of those affectionate things they do here, like hugging. Not to worry, though, I have no intention of using either of you for handshakes." She giggled as Sonata smiled and clicked her jaws together to make the point.

"Uh, y-yea, good, glad to hear that."

Handshakes weren't what Aria was thinking about, but at least her sisters were placated.


A little later that day, Adagio again sat with a servant holding the book for her.

"These spells are made up with a similar structure to our own, nearly identical in the aural overlays, but relying on our own life-force in place of-"

Aria, not patient at the best of times, tried to speed things along while angrily staring down the six mind-slaves that alternated between enviously looking at the one holding the book, and looking at her with bright eyes and creepy smiles. "Why's it making them act like this?!"

On Adagio's opposite side, Sonata had taken the opposite approach; enabling the will of their thralls to do what she wanted as much as possible, but it was kind of backfiring on her. "Uhm, l-look guys," she said to the five holding various tasty foods for her while three more massaged her long neck, "I know we've got three heads, but we've only got one gut!"

"Take my offering, Master!"

"Please, take mine!"

"These chocolates are fresh, and still warm!"

Groaning with frustration as her concentration slipped away, Adagio scowled. "Enough! All of you, out, and Master will call you when you are needed!" To her relief, there were only a few, easily-quashed protests this time before the lot of them cleared out. When they were gone (that is, doubtlessly standing by the doors to the room, listening carefully for any sign that they were wanted), Adagio stood up to pace the floor.

"We didn't order this, did we? The way they keep actively looking for ways to please us? Not even back home did we have anyone so eager to be commanded."

Sonata smiled somewhat nervously. "Y-yea, it's almost like we're trying to please them now."

Adagio stopped, her sisters craning their necks to see her with that I-just-realized-something face. Aria deadpanned the question.

"Please, don't keep us in suspense. What is it?"

"It is like we're trying to please them now, isn't it? Like they're addicted to us now, and we're not giving all of them their fix... Do you think they'd calm down if we hugged them all?"

"Oh, Hell no!"


"Every time you make us hug someone, Sonata breathes down my neck!"

Sonata blushed as she glared at Aria. "I DO NOT!!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do n-"

Adagio exerted control to make them both look at her. "Girls, quiet! Don't make me get the socks again!"

Their ears folding back, they replied in unison. "We'll be good!"

Feeling just a smidge of guilt at the (very cute!) looks of fear in their little faces, she sighed. "Sorry. Look, maybe I just need to revise the orders, get everyone together and come up with something more specific. I know some of the ones here now have work today, so they may even be exploiting the loophole in my orders; making excuses in their normal lives to come see us, not unlike an addict finding extra time to indulge their craze. With more and more such people flocking to the same place, it's only a matter of time before we're discovered."

"We've got like, fifty people by now, right?" Aria flicked a fin. "That's gotta be enough to at least hold our ground if they come for us."

"Provided that all of them are here when the Rainbooms find out about our little operation?"


"Indeed. It's getting late, so we'll call everyone here tomorrow and go from there." It was still strange to her to not tell her sisters to do as they pleased until she could come up with their next move, as it would be rather senseless right now. Instead, she sat down in the especially comfortable chair again, letting them briefly bicker over what channel to watch. Sonata won because she proved more dexterous with the remote in her mouth, and Aria wasn't willing to risk more annoyance by calling for a servant's help.


Meanwhile, in the Canterlot suburbs, six girls had again gathered in Pinkie Pie's room for a sleepover. Fluttershy wore a self-conscious smile as Rarity delicately styled her hair, humming a cheerful tune that Fluttershy was tempted to sing along to. She looked over at Applejack and Rainbow Dash to see them playing one of those games together. By the look of Rainbow's petulant frown, she was losing again, but at least she accepted the loss with dignity by not shutting the game off this time. A glance at Sunset Shimmer was what got her to speak up.

"Sunset? Is something wrong?"

Shrugging, Sunset wore a worried face. "I hope not, but I don't really know. Twilight said she'd be here, but she's skipped out to focus on her studies a few times before." That she was still trying to study magic in private sometimes was something Sunset hoped to work through. "I guess it-"

Everyone in the room was startled when Pinkie kicked the door open, wearing an akubra and holding the human Twilight Sparkle in her arms in the standard princess-carrying pose. No one asked why she was using a ridiculous Australian accent. "Oi found moi quarry, oi did!"

Slightly frazzled, Twilight looked up at her captor. "Y-yes, you found me, congratulations, now can you please put me down?" She was gently deposited on the bed while Rarity remarked on the relation of akubras to hunting. "Sorry I'm late," she said to the others, "but my brother and Dean Cadence were acting... weird."

Rainbow tilted her head. "That's why you were gonna skip?"

Twilight's eyebrows furrowed. "No, I was on my way here when Pinkie grabbed me!"

Tilting her hat to cover one eye, Pinkie wore a triumphant smirk. "Found. Moi. Quarry."

"Weird how?" asked Sunset.

"Well, Shiny was talking about how amazing this woman he met was... and so was Cadence!" The short silence told her that she must not have talked about those two enough for it to be obvious that they had eyes only for each other. "And that's... weird! They looked a little out of it, too, like they were on some kind of medication. They even invited me to come see her."

"So they met a pretty lady," remarked Applejack, "it ain't that strange."

"True," Twilight replied while reaching for her phone, "but the others in Crystal Prep have texted me a few times about how a lot of people have been exhibiting unusual behavior, especially Lemon Zest."

When she'd first heard it, the knowledge that the Shadowbolts kept in touch with Twilight, sent her sweet, encouraging messages sometimes (even Sugarcoat!), had warmed Fluttershy's heart, but she never thought it could lead to anxiety and dread. "W-what do you mean?"

Frowning, Twilight looked over her messages in the vain hope of gleaning answers from them. "I don't know, all they've told me is that some of the other students, and a few random people around town, are acting 'weird.'" She looked up at her friends, worry clear in her face. "Do you think something is happening?"

Sunset wasn't sure how to set her at ease, so she didn't. "Maybe. Did your brother describe this woman at all?"

"That's another weird thing; I asked that too and neither of them would tell me her name, who she was, or what she looked like, just that I should join them at the park for tea."

Considering the circumstances, Sunset had three guesses for who might have been behind something like this. Or, one guess three times, if they were still all together. "Maybe we should give it a look, just to see what's going on. Everyone up for a trip to Canterlot City Park?" She smiled at the five little cheers from her friends, and at the relieved, grateful look they won out of Twilight.

"Ooh," said Pinkie, firing one of those little confetti cannons into the air, "we should totally-urk!"

She was seized by the collar by a very annoyed Rarity, who now had a lot of confetti in her slightly messy hair. Blue eyes narrowed as she spoke in an icy whisper. "Pinkie Pie? The way you and your sisters trade gifts with one another on your own holiday for sibling affection is very sweet. We understand that you enjoy the ballistic party supplies Maud has bestowed upon you, and we're all happy for you. However? I have been polite, I have been patient, but if you get shredded bits of glittered paper in my hair one, more, time, I will drop everything and punish you. Are we clear?"

Grinning nervously, Pinkie offered a shaky salute. "C-clear as a sparkly crystal, Rare!"

Rarity regained a much kinder smile as she let Pinkie go. "Splendid. Now, has anyone seen my brush?" Fluttershy pointed to her hand, the one with which she'd been using exactly that brush just minutes ago. Rarity blinked twice, then facepalmed as the rest of the room giggled.


When the sirens awoke the next morning, they were (mostly) pleased to find no one standing over their bed and making creepy faces. Then Aria nudged open the bedroom door and loosed a long, high-pitched shriek at the sight of three servants standing right there with big smiles and very focused stares.

"Good morning, Master," they said in unison, "do you need anything right now?"

A shiver ran up the length of Sonata's neck as she grimaced. "Okay, being ready for instant sexytimes before we've even asked? Great. Doing that ultra-creepy talking-at-the-same-time thing? Nightmare town."

"Y-yea," muttered Aria as she pulled herself together, "glad we're on the same page." The two of them looked at Adagio to find her with a thousand-yard stare. Still less creepy than the servants. "Uh... Adagio? You okay?"

"You now stand in the company of your new masters," she uttered, "Until you are released, you will fulfill our every whim without hesitation or complaint." Her eyes re-focusing on them, she frowned. "I used that wording on every new slave. The way they've been bothering us, all but begging for orders? It's my fault. With that word choice, they are to do as we command until they are released, so when we have no orders for them, they want more for as long as they're in our power, to the point that they actively come looking for it." She looked up to confirm that Suri and her boss from the clothing shop, two of the first people they ever really dominated, were among the eager slaves waiting on her even now. "I wasn't careful enough with the word choice, but worse than that? I looked over the spell matrices in the book to find that-"

"Woah, woah, woah," interrupted Aria, "before you get into the technobabble, can you keep it, uh... Sonata-friendly, please?"

Not picking up the insult, Sonata smiled. "Aww, thanks, Ria!"

Rolling her eyes, Adagio summed up. "Layman's terms? The book's magic mixed with our own, and as our songs were enthralling to begin with, the two magnified each other."

Aria looked at the waiting servants, which made them perk up like a dog that just heard 'walkies.' "Hypno-domination plus super seduction equals annoying and creepy brain-slaves?"

"That, combined with the order they were given, has left them not just forcefully obedient, but, as I said before, addicted to us. They're getting increasingly obsessed, and if we don't cut this off now, it's only going to get worse. I'm sure I can fix this, but we'll need to gather everyone together."


It was fortunate that most of the slaves were friends or acquaintances who already had each others' numbers, because contacting them for an emergency meeting at the house was made much simpler. Still, there were a few oddball outliers, so the sirens still had to have the majority wait out in front of the porch until all fifty-something servants had reported in. Luckily, most of them were eager to serve anyway, and everyone was present by around noon, with Lemon Zest having been delegated to keep everyone where they were.

Just inside the house, Adagio paced back and forth, her certainty having slipped away over the course of the morning.

"Uh, Adagio," asked Aria, who was again getting dizzy from their host's favorite habit, "they're all out there waiting, you can do the thing now."

"Have to do it right," she muttered back, "but I need to get the wording absolutely perfect this time, or the next unintended consequence may be the one that ruins us!" Truth be told, she'd come up with a dozen specific orders that sounded perfect to her, but so had the one that led to where they were right now. To Aria's dismay, she started pacing faster. "Could try to put them on the same level as Lemon, but that much free will would prove dangerous. Could tell them not to do anything at all unless specifically called on, but would that affect how they live while away from us? I could just give them a list 'Do and Don't' and- but, no, if they mixed up the order, it could still-"

With how frazzled their once-perfectly-confident leader was getting, Sonata didn't even bother to whisper as she frowned. "Hey, Aria? Being a snake-lady kind of sucks."

Aria might not have disagreed, but as the book was her idea in the first place, she still replied in a sub-zero growl through clenched teeth. "I see that."

Adagio's thoughts were interrupted by the door to the porch sliding open, but at this point, she considered that a relief. That relief was jeopardized when Lemon stepped in with a slightly worried look on her face.

"Hey, they're getting kinda antsy out there, think you're almost ready to talk to 'em?" She glanced over her shoulder and chuckled. "It's almost like they're waiting for a concert and you guys are the rockstars."

"Heh," Aria said with a half-hearted smile, "if only we could get the actual music going again. Working people over with songs was so much easier."

"Indeed," sighed Adagio, "but without the gems, without more than the essence of our old powers, we have nothing but vocals." The thought came back and hit her like a two-ton boomerang. "...This, this magic we have now... it's, not really the same as our own, is it?" Her eyes started to burn as she tried to keep an even voice. "We still don't have what we wanted, and like this, we probably never will."

There was a silence, which Sonata tried to fill with her best effort at a smile and her usual peppy tones. "Well, we still have something, right? I mean, even if we have to work 'em a bit, we still got people loving and adoring us, doing everything we want, and being treated like the idols we were always supposed to be. That's fun, right...?" No one else said anything. She sighed. "I kinda miss dancing, though."

Aria was looking squarely at the floor. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Adagio replied immediately, "you couldn't have known things would turn out like this any more than I could have predicted the outcome of the Battle. Things are what they are," she said resolutely, working a bit of authority into her voice, "and all we can do is press on. Lemon? We'll need your help straightening up the kimono; we have a crowd to address."

Feeling hopeful about things, Lemon smiled.


The sirens stepped out onto the porch to an immediate roar of applause, which they may have gotten even if Lemon, who walked behind them, hadn't gotten them looking all prim and proper. While they were a little iffy about the attention they'd been getting, the three-headed girl(s) smiled as they took in the adoration. Adagio cleared her throat.

"Good afternoon, everyone. I've called you here for an important issue regarding-"

That was as far as she got in her speech before she caught sight of a band of people approaching in the distance. Seven people, one of them a girl with purple, pink-striped hair, another bearing red and yellow locks Adagio would have recognized anywhere. Changing gears, she revised her speech mid-sentence.

"-some new guests, who have stopped by to visit. Make way for them, would you? I think they'd like an audience with us..."

Author's Note:

Is Shining Armor still a student in Crystal Prep, or was he just kinda there to help persuade Twilight? (whom, if I'm not mistaken, Cinch threatened academically right in front of him, not saying a word. Thanks a lot, Mr. BBBFF.) If the former, I think Cadence being a dean might make things legally awkward. More-so than a spontaneous Japanese house in the park.

Also: The image that got me to actually start this thing!

"We'll be good!"

Next time: the Rainbooms arrive!

There were only two votes on whether or not to show the bad ending I had in mind, so I've opted to just summarize it in the author's notes for the next chapter. There wouldn't have been any decent gags anyway.

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