Rarity decides that Fluttershy needs some deodourizing. Sequal to Get Clean! by ocalhoun.
Written as part of ocalhoun's Big 250k Contest.
Chapters (1)
- Member Since 4th Feb, 2016
- offline last seen April 12th
JediWyrm
Just a person writing about ponies, like lots of people on here.
JediWyrm
Joined 4th Feb, 2016 ·
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Goddamn it, Rarity. Why Fluttershy?
Are you so fucking sexual for cleanliness you had to do this to someone who would've been genuinely hurt by your actions?
1/10 because Flutters is 2cute4this.
6940608 I was going to have it be Applejack getting back at Rarity, but then I saw someone else had done that. So I then thought up this, I had a couple other ideas for it, Fluttershy hiding out at Applejacks for a brief moment and her calling on Discord for help as she's getting put into the tub but as I was writing out the story they just kinda fell off.
Out of the mane 6 I like Fluttershy the most, so I didn't really enjoy doing this to her, but it felt like it'd make the best story, also why I have Rainbow Dash and DisQord planning revenge, though I leave that to someone else to write up.
Well, the dark undertones in Get Clean are becoming more overtone-like, I suppose. Maybe Rarity does need to be stopped. A few typos and amateurish phrasing, but that's to be expected, right? The real downer was that it took quite a while for the story to really get around to the beginning of the story, instead we get a pretty lengthy tea party with Fluttershy and Rarity with no conflict whatsoever to make it interesting. And then we spend most of the rest of the story with Rarity chasing Fluttershy down. The actual Flutter-traumatizing takes place in just a few paragraphs near the end. Also, it was confusing a few times. What happened between Rarity and Rainbow after Rainbow made her threat/promise, anyway? Did Rainbow follow Rarity, or did she just give up on it? Despite all that, though, it was a fairly readable story, and it does continue the theme of random unconsensual bath-time hijinks.
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A review for ocalhoun's big 250k contest.
Remember to vote for the winner of the People's Choice award!
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