I write what makes me happy. Hope it makes you happy as well!
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Well... It was certainly a quick story! Well written, the breaks sorta messed with the flow, but it still felt like it had a purpose
Nice story, but there's a few minor things you may want to edit.
That should be capitalized.
That should be "he".
Those should be "Vinyl's" and "came".
And you've got a double space between those words.
In the description here, I guess the long desc it's called?
= conscience
Was a pretty fun read, although it could use a rewrite for more than a few grammatical errors here and there.
Daddy put a bun in both of their oven's? Hot. Not sure where else to take this one, but I'd like to see more.
You have a good start here, but you need a decent prereader. Caught a few tense changes here and there. The actual penetrative sex also felt awfully rushed.
I was hoping for that ending. Great work with this fic! Really fulfills that forbidden fantasy we all think about once in a while.
Very good !
I now finally understand why there is so much incest and other wrong kinks in the pony fandom! It's because Hasbro made a game called... Taboooooo!
img04.deviantart.net/cc7f/i/2012/092/3/8/soooooky_applejack_cosplay__click_to_see__by_papersquid-d4uq8sh.jpg
The expression is "Never look a gift horse in the mouth."
Also, I've noticed you use this expression with an alarming frequency....
i like the story but the fact vinyl barely talks is a turn off for me, you could get a couple chapters out of it if you did a back story of octavia and her father and how they started fucking then another chapter of the threesome