• Published 17th Feb 2016
  • 1,050 Views, 4 Comments

Changing View - Banana Prince



Ponyville is definitely not what it seems. Through changeling eyes is an even stranger realm.

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Changing View

It was roughly late morning when an unsuspecting stallion trotted down the cobblestone path into Ponyville. This stallion, Red Banner, was no real pony, though. He was one of Chrysalis’s most prestigious and trusted agents. Even though this strange place scared him, he felt it that this was the place where he would change history and be the shift in balance in the war between the queen and the ponies… What was that whistling? Where was it-

A piano dropped onto Red Banner from the sky. A grey pegasus courier landed by the mess, rubbing her head.

“Gee, sorry…” she said. “My hooves slipped.”

“Yeah… It’s okay… Don’t mention it.” Red Banner wanted to say. “Mmph, hmmph, mmhhm!” was what Red Banner really said.


Red Banner stepped into Chrysalis’s ebony throne room where the queen sat on her throne, getting her hooves filed, waiting for him. Red Banner trotted up to her and gave a quick little bow.

“Yes, my queen?” Red Banner asked.

“I have an important mission for you, my servant. Recently, there was a wedding in pony territory, the whole town was there.” Red Banner’s mouth watered thinking of all of the love and emotion packed in a single place. “One of the guests was a changeling and he wasn’t in disguise. Do you know what this means?”

The changeling shook his head. “No, your highness.”

“Well, idiot, it means that not only are there defectors that have chosen life in pony territory, there are actually accepted among pony-kind. Soon enough they’ll be equals, and soon enough they’ll be assisting the ponies against us, the righteous changeling empire, with all of their knowledge of our inner workings. This could put all of us in jeopardy!”

“I am ready for any task you need me to do.”

“You need to be. You are going into this Ponyville, learn all that you can so we can get ahead of the ponies.”

The changeling giving Chyrsalis a hooficure sharply raised her hoof.

“What is it now, Styler?!”

“Well, your majesty, with all due respect, I don’t think the ponies even know we’re around. I mean, we haven’t staged an assault in over a year – let alone have ever been assaulted by the ponies.” Chrysalis scowled. “…And I don’t think these defectors will cross us—uh, you, since they leave to live with ponies because… well… they say you’re just too crazy.”

“Styler, you are now demoted to “throne”.”

Chrysalis stood up and let the changeling beneath her walk out and pick up Styler’s hoof file. Styler groaned and lied down under the queen. Chrysalis then sat down on her new throne.

Red Banner threw a salute. “I will not fail you.” He proudly proclaimed. He turned around and marched off.


Now here that same changeling was, finally getting himself picked out from underneath a smashed piano, picking out broken keys and splinters from his mane. Red Banner walked into town, rubbing his sore head. He now stood in the middle of Ponyville. Every pony was walking around with smiles on their faces.

“Now… Where do I start?” Red Banner wondered, looking around. Everything was just too foreign, different, and colorful. He barely knew what was what.

“Hi!” A mare greeted.

Red Banner hissed and jumped back, flailing his two front hooves.

“Oh! Sorry. Are you okay?” This mare was a green… earth-pony, Red Banner thought. She had a pink and white mane and three peppermints as a cutie mark. He got back down on his four hooves and regained his composure.

“Yes.”

“Huh… Are you new in town?”

“Uh… Yes! I’m from… west! …And I was hoping for someone to show me everything about this town, Ponyville and all of its weaknesses if possible. I’m working on… a paper… for school…”

“Sure, thing! I’m not really doing anything! My name’s Minty! What’s yours?”

“Hello. I am Red Banner, unicorn, citizen. Nice to … uhhh… meet you, fellow pony.”

“Hello again! Come on. Let’s go.” Minty turned around and tripped. She quickly picked herself up, smiling and continued forward.

Minty guided Red Banner through the streets of Ponyville. Already, she knew the perfect place to start. She took him to the market square full of bustling ponies who were buying, selling, or just strolling along enjoying the day.

“Ponies from all around come here, so you can find anything here.” Minty explained. “Lots of stores set up stands here to let ponies buy samples and surplus items. You can meet lots of friendly ponies, too – maybe even somepony you know.”

Colorful stands were set up in every direction filled with anything from samples of candy to various bolts of yarn. Red Banner looked at the stands, wondering wether or not he should send Queen Chrysalis something from here as a part of the report as evidence – she likes gifts - but he couldn’t think of exactly what he should get. Nothing here proved anything real important about pony culture, let alone anything useful to his mission.

Suddenly, something caught the changeling’s attention.

“Come one, come all and witness the greatest of spectacles of your life!” Some mare called out.

Red Banner couldn’t resist approaching the blue unicorn.

“Uh, Banner? She’s –“Minty tried to say, but her words fell on deaf ears. The crimson stallion continued forward.

Red Banner sat down, before a stage, among a small crowd of entranced foals. On the stage, stood the proud, blue unicorn.

“Fillies and colts… I The Great and Powerful Trixie have survived an encounter with a mighty ursa minor! Buildings were destroyed, ponies were scarred, but Trixie remained unscathed. Months later, Trixie’s magic proved to be a match for the power of Princess Twilight Sparkle!” In the sky, stars appeared in the daytime sky depicting the disaster of the ursa minor and the duel with Princess Twilight Sparkle. “Though, she’s talent, you’ll find me much more amazing.”

A mare or two passing stopped to shake their heads or sigh at Trixie. Red Banner and the foals however hung on every word.

“Watch…”

Trixie took off her hat and pulled out a white rabbit. All the foals cheered and Red Banner watched, mouth agape. Minty chuckled a little, seeing the look on his face. She left him there for about ten minutes, before she walked up to him and nudged him a little.

“Come on.” She said. “There’s more to see.”

Minty and Red Banner walked into the store together where they were met by a well-groomed white unicorn.

“Why, hello there! I am Miss Rarity. You can just call me Rarity. How may I help you?”

“Hello, Miss Rarity.” Red Banner said. “I was visiting Ponyville today.”

“We were looking for something-“Minty began when Rarity suddenly darted out of sight. When she came back after only a moment, in her magic, she was holding an elegantly stitched pink dress worthy of royalty.

“Now, this would look perfect on you…” Rarity said. With a flash from her horn, the dress appeared on Minty. Rarity pulled her in front of a mirror. “As you can see, this dress looks well with a mare of any coat color, but looking at it on you, I’d say it was meant for you. I’ll cut you a deal-”

“Thanks.” Minty interrupted. “But I was going to ask if you have anything for my new friend here.”

Rarity looked over to the red unicorn looking around the store.

“Oh, a stallion…” Rarity muttered. “Umm…You’ll have to give me a second, darlings.”

Rarity ran into the back, searching hard. She came back holding a brown hat and a scarf in her magic. Red Banner took them and tried them on in the mirror. He stood there with a blank expression.

“I’m sorry, but we really don’t get too many stallions here. This is all we really have with you. You know, if you don’t like it, you can come back in about two days and I can-“

“I look great!” Red Banner proclaimed.

He posed in the mirror admiring his new appearance from every angle, sparkles in his eyes. If only he didn’t need to maintain his disguise. The hat and the scarf would probably look even better on him as a changeling.

Minty paid Rarity and they left together.

“Are you liking Ponyville yet?” Minty asked as they walked down the dirt road.

“Yes. I am. I never knew that Ponyville has great shopping. Back, uh, west selection is minimal. Thank you.”

“If you think it’s great now, wait ‘till you’ve ate here.”

Red Banner stopped and gulped hard. “Eat?”

Red Banner felt a little hot at the thought of sharing lunch with a pony. He never fed on anything besides love- let alone love that hadn’t been provided by cocoons. He never even eaten anything a pony would eat, so he didn’t even think that he could eat pony food. He has heard about other changelings eating pony food - Queen Chrysalis included! She said that it was akin to poison, but, then again, she did say that Ponyville was a very militaristic cruel place.

“Sugarcube Corner?” Red Banner asked. “I’m sorry, but my quee-- uh, my friend said it’s awf-- not that great.”

“Maybe that’s because you’re friend’s never tried it before!” chimed a mare who suddenly popped out from underneath their table. She was a pink mare with a mane like cotton candy. Red Banner looked underneath the table wondering if she was actually under there the whole time or if she used a teleporting spell of some kind.

“Hi, Pinkie Pie!”

“Hi, Minty! Now what were you saying about Sugarcube Corner?”

“My new friend, Red Banner was saying that he hasn’t tried the food here.”

(“Friend?” thought Red Banner.)

Pinkie Pie turned her head to the unicorn sitting next to Minty who just nervously smiled and waved as Pinkie Pie leaned in closer as if looking for something.

“My, uh, friend had some fritters last time she was here – Ponyville - and she didn’t like them.” Red Banner quickly wiped the bead of sweat rolling down the side of his face.

Pinkie Pie gave a wide, wide smile.

“Maybe, you should try some for yourself.” She finally said. “… This is on me!”

Pinkie Pie, out of nowhere, pulled out an inviting white frosted cake, topped with pecans on a white platter. It was still warm. The smell of it wafted almost directly to Red Banner it seemed… and he liked it. Maybe just a bite, he thought. In his magic, he picked up a fork. Hesitantly and slowly he slipped the little bite of cake into his mouth.

A moment of hesitation followed. Minty and Pinkie Pie leaned in close.

Red Banner’s eyes opened wide. He suddenly looked back down unto the cake sitting on the table in front of him. He got his fork and started shoveling the rest of the cake down his mouth.

“See? What did I tell ya’?” Pinkie Pie said. “This one’s on me!”

She walked away and left the two in the booth alone.

“So, Red Banner,” Minty began. “Are you liking things yet?”Red Banner, still munching on cake, looked up for a second and gave a quick little nod. Minty couldn’t help, but giggle. “So, I forgot, where you here on a vacation or something?”

Red Banner stopped eating. He hesitated. He swallowed hard.

“Uhh… well…I was supposed to be here for a short while…”

“Oh, okay. Does that mean you’re leaving soon?”

Red Banner stopped, turning his head to the side and rubbing his shoulder. He took one more look at Minty and smiled. It was then and there that he took off his disguise.


Queen Chrysalis sat up straight when a guard came in. “What is it?” In his mouth was a rolled up parchment - the report. It was way too soon for one. That could be either really good or disastrous. Maybe it’s part of a daily report? She unraveled the letter and read.
To her highness,

The Righteous Ruler,

Queen Chrysalis
Though I’ve only stayed in Ponyville a short time, I can safely say that I haven’t learned everything there is to know, but I have learned just about all I needed to, thanks to a mare that I’m happy to call “friend” as she’s called me.
It was definitely not what I was expecting at all. The clothes shopping and the food was actually amazing. The boutique here has clothes mostly for mares, but I’m sure the seamstress will have a wider variety if I can manage to get more stallions to check it out. The pastries there were actually much better than I was told. I recommend it. My stomach does feel a little upset, but I was told that’s normal after eating a cake by myself.
All in all, Ponyville is not actually as militaristic as we thought. It’s really a town of kind-hearted ponies that have to offer something for anyone, including their hearts – and I didn’t have to impersonate or capture any pony to do it either! It’s as nice as it sounds.
I recommend that a lot us should come here and enjoy the town for all it has too offer, even if it is just for a vacation. Me? I’ve decided to spend my money buying a house here. I’ve discovered my talent for making banners, so I have potential to start a business here. Who would’ve known that my name was actually my hidden talent?
Don’t worry. I still haven’t forget my queen or my home. I’m thinking about starting an embassy or making peace. These ponies don’t really seem like they want to fight, so it should be easy. My backup plan is to write a guidebook or a travel brochure for changelings. As for my queen, I sent you a little something as a show of my loyalty and gratitude. If anything take it as a tax.

Sincerely,

You’re honored, thankful servant,

Red Banner.

Chrysalis balled up the parchment and tossed it aside (at a changeling). She looked down and saw that her guard also had a very small box on his back. Chrysalis took the box from her guard and, from the box, she took out a pair of green socks with little black hearts. Chrysalis hesitated for a moment. Finally she placed them aside, hiding a faint smile.

Comments ( 4 )

“Uh… Yes! I’m from… west! …And I was hoping for someone to show me everything about this town, Ponyville and all of its weaknesses if possible. I’m working on… a paper… for school…”

“Sure, thing! I’m not really doing anything! My name’s Minty! What’s yours?”

“Hello. I am Red Banner, unicorn, citizen. Nice to … uhhh… meet you, fellow pony.”

One of Chrysalis's best agents?
She must be really desperate...


An ordinary story.

But I think his revelation was a bit too rushed. Really. I mean, he is there for merely a few hours at most and he already betrayals his mission by showing himself. Not very believable.

Also, I would use a few blank lines for the paragraphs. Would look much better. Same goes for the description.
Additionally I would put the letter in an <quote> box. (I think it looks simply better)

I liked it. And it seems like Chryssie might be swayed to be less paranoid, which is good.

Just one thing, should be your, not you're at the end.

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I tried making Chrysalis and Red Banner a balance of their comedic stereotypes of goofy aliens and the season 2's depiction. It seems I did "okay", but I need to remember common sense (don't we all?).
I'm too comfortable doing stories of this length and no multi-chapter stories because of my schedule. It used to be that High School and ordeals of homework got in the way. Now I have to type up the stories at home with an off-line computer at certain times then go to another town to a library to publish it and add a cover. Since I don't have a car, it's not easy going. I can comment and read on a phone, but that's about it. I don't want to make an excuse, but I'd like for people to understand my limits.
It's for this reason I REALLY don't like doing multi-chapter stories. I feel like they take a lot of dedication and time, so if I do a big project, I'd like to colab with an editor (which I can't) to make sure I don't waste too much time. Although with the time on my hands, I'm considering a multi-chapter story, but the chances I get it up is about the same as Derpy (I mean Bubbles, ITunes) getting her own episode.

very adorable, despite the rushed-ness of the storyline (like what ponydragon mentioned)

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