Ball!
~~~>><<~~~
The gloomy atmosphere felt appropriate for such a place. Dark, damp, small tinges of green with black overlay, and the occasional cesspool of green slime. If these do not equal to Changeling territory in one’s mind, then they do not get around very much.
At the center of this barren and dead wasteland was a tree. Obviously dead, its blackened exterior fit amongst the landscape. What could be described as a mixture of organic and inorganic materials ran up the the trunk of the tree, like veins. The veins ran up each branch, connecting one branch to many others which created odd-looking structures between the dead branches.
The exterior of the castle was abuzz with activity. Changelings zipped and zoomed around the trunk of the tree, occasionally entering and exiting a multitude of holes that have been cut into the tree.
In the highest structure of the tree, a changeling guard stood watch in front of a door. With a spear in hoof and a focused demeanor, the changeling scanned the hallway ahead for anypony who might disturb the queen.
“Hehe…”
The sound of giggling from nowhere made the changeling go on alert, tightening its grip on the spear. with another echo, they readied their spear and charged their horn, scanning the hall for what might come.
“Hehe...hahaha-OOH!”
That didn't sound like it came from the hall. Rather, it came from the queen’s study. With curiosity the changeling neared the study’s double doors, placing an ear to the door. Without a moment to react, the door was slammed open and the changeling guard was now stuck between the door and the wall.
A red orb bounced down the hallways, with each bounce the sound echoed throughout the hallway.
“HA!” Queen Chrysalis stood at the doorway of her study, pointing at the flying orb with a deranged smile. “I have you now!” The queen raced down the hall after the red orb, giggling all the way. Pouncing on the orb, she held it in her embrace before lying on her back and juggled it between her hooves, giggling like a filly.
As the door closed, the changeling guard fell face-first on the wooden floor. A rough outline of the guard’s figure accompanied by his spear was now embedded into the wall. As they stood, they trotted and sidestepped like they were just absolutely hammered.
With a vigorous shake of their head, their world stopped spinning. They watched with a deadpan expression as their queen played with the red ball like a kitten with yarn. The changeling stood in front of the queen, scratching their head with a hoof.
“Ah guard, excellent!” Chrysalis said, holding the red ball in her magic. “I need you to do something for me. Here.” Chrysalis held the ball directly in the guard’s face.
Is this a test? Is the queen testing me? The changeling’s mind raced, unsure what to do next. With careful hesitation, the changeling magic enveloped the red ball and held it in mid-air.
As the changeling's magic held the ball in mid air, Chrysalis jumped. She leaned down into a pounce position, head and front portion of her body close to the ground and wiggling rump in the air.
The changeling was really confused, why was their queen acting like this? More importantly, what does she want the guard to do?
Chrysalis grew impatient. “Well..” She said, keeping her excited demeanor. “Throw it!”
Her order did not make this any more clear to the changeling guard, not to mention any less confusing. The guard stood there with one eyebrow raised, pointing to the ball that was enveloped in its aura.
“Yeah, throw it!” Chrysalis nodded, her tail swishing back and forth like an overexcited dog’s.
The changeling’s confusion did not subside, and rather than trying to make sense of this whole...whatever this was, it would be best to just go along with it. The changeling sighed, shaking his head and feeling a headache coming along. And it was nowhere near noon.
The changeling opened their eyes, getting into a ready stance and held the ball high. With a throw of his magic, the ball flew several meters down the hall.
The changeling queen started her chase of the red ball with a skidding of her hooves on the wooden floor. “Ball!” She screamed, going into a full blown sprint down the hall.
‘I’m not getting paid enough for this…’ The changeling guard facehooved with a sigh. Nevertheless, it was his duty to watch the queen. With another heavy sigh, the changeling unfurled their insect-like wings and buzzed down the hall after the queen.
‘Wait...I’m not getting paid at all!’
Chrysalis ran through the halls, chasing the red ball she was so transfixed upon. In her sprint, the queen unknowingly barged past other changelings, guards or otherwise, and a few times crashed into the wall as the ball traversed down a perpendicular hall.
The changeling guard, now having lost sight of their queen, was not entirely lost. The signs of chaos and destruction of the dead yet sturdy wooden walls and floor were markers to where she went. It would be a pretty easy guess to say she was heading for the throne room.
The entirety of the throne room was a mixture of blackened wood and organic pods of green goo that surrounded a double dais. The queen’s throne on the dais was different from the rest of the palace in that it was fully comprised of black chitin, which shimmered in an eerie fashion under the green bioluminescence.
The changeling entered the throne room, the doors left wide open. As they had guessed, their queen had come to her throne, but was not sitting in it. In the middle of the room, there stood Queen Chrysalis, holding the red ball in her mouth and tail wagging happily. Surprisingly, her sharp and elongated canine teeth didn’t seem to puncture the ball’s hide.
“Gaw, ook!” The ball still in her mouth. “I caw heh haw!” She jumped happily.
“Mm-hm!” The guard nodded along. In the back of their mind, they were ferociously facehooving.
“Ah!” the queen blurted, removing the ball from her mouth and held it in an aura of her magic. “I have an idea! I should show this to Celestia!” She beamed, jumping once more before blasting a hole into the ceiling with her magic.
The changeling guard threw a hoof over their head as bits of wood and organic stuff flew past. Looking back, they were able to catch a glimpse of the queen before she darted upwards through the newly made hole with ball in tow.
With a heavy sigh, they unfurled their insect wings and followed their queen. From her direction of flight, it seemed she was true about where she was heading.
Canterlot.
~~~>><<~~~
From her throne she was Equestria’s ruler, her job to ensure the safety of her ponies was a tiring yet fulfilling duty.
“...and the ‘No Broccoli’ Bill will begin implementation in the new year. Are there any objections to this?” The regal Celestia faced her advisors.
With a collective shake of their heads, the advisers signaled their contentment.
Celestia nodded. “Excellent. Moving on to the next order of business, removing that chimera from the garden fountain.”
“CELESTIA!”
A beam of green magic penetrated the ornate marble roof of Celestia’s throne room, pieces of ivory marble flew past Celestia and her advisors. With the channeling of the goddess’ magic, a golden barrier protected her and the advisers.
The smoke cleared ominously to reveal the black and green insectoid, who sneered at the divine goddess with snake-like eyes and angled teeth each like a serrated blade. With an evil cackle, she stepped from the still lingering smoke.
Celestia’s pair of elite unicorn guards blocked the changeling’s path, holding their swords in the queen’s face, which elicited another cackle from the changeling queen.
“My, Celestia, is this how you greet your guests?” She joked.
Celestia’s demeanor remained constant. “What is you want, Chrysalis?” She snarled at the changeling queen.
Chrysalis chuckled, “Nay Celestia. Rather, I bring a gift.”
“Oh?” Celestia remained suspicious of the queen, lowering the barrier but trotted cautiously forward. Her guards retreated, but stayed relatively close behind with an ever watchful eye of the changeling that stood before them.
They stood one meter from each other, Celestia with her suspicions and Chrysalis with her toothy smile.
“What exactly is this ‘gift’ you bring?” Celestia questioned.
With a chuckle, the changeling’s horn glowed a brilliant green and suddenly a bright flash.
“Ball!” Chrysalis’ face changed from a toothy smirk to overjoy.
Celestia’s face changed to confusion as a ball materialized in front of her. “...Ball?”
“Ball!”
“Ball?”
“Ball!”
“Ball!”
“Ball!” The alicorn and changeling queen cheered and jumped in unison, taking a seat on their haunches. Chrysalis released the ball from her magical aura, tossing it to the princess and Celestia bouncing it right back.
The elite guards and Celestia’s advisors stared in bewilderment as the two alicorns played ball in the center of the throne room, laughing and giggling to their heart’s content.
The changeling buzzed into the ornate throne room from the hole in the ceiling, feeling drained from having to keep up with the queen. With weak knees, they landed next to an elite guard and took a quick breather before stopping, taking notice of the current situation.
“...Are you about as confused as I am?” The elite guard asked the changeling.
“Mm-hmm.” The changeling replied.
“Alright then.”
With that, the changeling guard fell to the floor, tired after flying so long with a head-splitting headache that persevered ever since this whole escapade started.
“I need a raise.”
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Gluten-Free Bisquick™ Chocolate Chip Cookies Recipe
Ingredients
1/2 cup butter, softened
1 cup packed brown sugar
1 teaspoon gluten-free vanilla
2 eggs
2 cups Bisquick™ Gluten Free mix
1 cup semisweet chocolate chips (6 oz)
Directions
1: Heat oven to 350°F. In large bowl, beat butter and brown sugar with electric mixer on medium speed until light and fluffy. Beat in vanilla and eggs. Add Bisquick™ mix; beat on low speed until combined. Stir in chocolate chips.
2: On ungreased cookie sheets, drop dough by tablespoonfuls about 2 inches apart.
3: Bake 8 to 12 minutes or until set on edges and golden brown. Cool 2 minutes. Remove from cookie sheets to cooling racks.
The descriptions are exquisite, and the premise is most amusing!
8/10 from me!
6819984 Ok, that sounds really delicious. I'm definitely gonna have to try to make that.
6820143 I'm glad you enjoy it!
It's... The curse of the round red rubber ball! WOOO!
All the while Twilight Sparkle sighed in relief and then chuckled, "Cadance was right, you can't make a pony drink, but you can make it so thirsty that said pony will drink like no tomorrow...now all I need to do is wait until my new localized version of the want-it-need-it spell wears off and I can tell those two about the photos we've taken...and Operation Flutterpony Harmony can commence."
"So we're going to take over Equestria by blackmailing ponies into creating reforms? I'm ah not sure I like that..."
"Oh darling...we're blackmailing corruption itself dear...although I really think we need uniforms if we're going to LARP as an evil syndicate."
"Umm...could someone tell Twilight that we're LARPing...if you don't mind that is..."
"Oh come on...flutters!! We're saving Equestria that's the coolest thing ever!!!"
Everyone turned to where the empty chair in the room was...
"Do you think it was okay...to let Pinkie handle...her?"
"Darling...Bon-Bon was a target the moment she broke her Pinkie Promise."
Meanwhile in an undisclosed location,
"And that is why you should always bet on black oh but you shouldn't bet on the Mares in Black because they aren't very nice and they don't keep there Pinkie Promises..."
"SHUT UP!!! I KNOW THAT NOW!!!"
"Gooood you're learning..."
Hah! Chrysalis and Celestia acting like puppies playing with a shiny ball. I can just imagine if Luna walked in on that scene. Either a massive facehoof and hauling her sister off to the psychiatrist would happen, or Luna would use the ROYAL CANTERLOT VOICE to scare them into dropping the ball so she could take it for herself.
Snrk. And this the Peace of the Red Ball wad born.
Later the same day Twilight had an aneurysm.
Cya
Raziel-chan
6820533
why is it I can actually see this happening at some point?
also this needs to be an actual story.
Cx Yes. This is just... brilliant. ^-^
fantastic work!
Ten out of ten muffins.
~SoDF
BALL! BALL! BALL!
Cute and funny. I love it!
BALL! I Love this!
This is so randomly beautiful.
I knew it
Alicorns love balls
Now I need to go to the nearest quarter machine
Okay, who disliked?
okay, their reactions to a shiny red ball, it's just so, "Petarded."
I am now hearing the song "Red Rubber Ball" in my head over and over... IT WON'T STAAAAAAHHHP!!
6820330 DO NOT TAUNT THE HAPPY FUN BALL...
*pokes the green glowing core of Happy Fun Ball... myootates...*
6819984 *Alondro slithers in and drops one flake of wheat germ into the mix while nopony is watching!* Muwah ha ha ha... now they shall suffer terrible diarrhea and bloating for days on end! Then they're be unable to stop me from... RULING ZHE VURLD!! BWAH HA HA HA!!
*clearly, an evil mastermind of the highest caliber...*
:chrysalis: "OK, you get a 10% raise." (0 Bits + 10% = 0 Bits)
Finally!! National security is ensured!
How to befriend you enemy, changeling style.
(A stupid idea which works isn't stupid.)
A nice, random One-Shot.
Good work!
But there are still a few you could improve/correct:
- Sometimes you start a sentence with a lowercase-letter.
- Sometimes there is one changeling-guard, sometimes there are more. Better decide and stay constant.
- 'With curiosity the changeling...' Here are too many spaces.
Ball!
derpicdn.net/img/2012/6/20/10875/full.gif
...ball...
That is all.
6844755 a souless asshole... who else? honestly who else does that?
it happens. it happens a lot XD
Yes... just... yes...
HEEHEEHEE!
Oh my this was just so cute!
Also not baking but it is a recipe I made up because I grew bored of the norm.
Taco Tuna Sandwich:
Ingredients:
1 can Tuna
1 1/2 teaspoons Taco Seasoning
3 dollops of Miracle Whip
1/4 cup cheese
1 small tomato, diced
6 slices whole wheat bread
Instructions:
1. Drain the tuna and put in bowl, adding and mixing in the Miracle Whip
2. Add the cheese, stir
3. Add Taco Seasoning, stir
4. Add the tomato, stir
5. Garnish with more cheese if so desired,
6. Slather onto bread and put two slices together.
Hehe nice and easy, but adds a nice kick to the normal tuna sandwich. And measurements can be changed to suit needs/tastes of course.
6819984
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/714/518/7c3.png
That was a funny and silly story to read!
I was laughing like crazy every time Chrysalis was playing with the ball like a kitty. It reminds me of the fanfic Princess Celestia and the Laser Pointer, where Celestia started to chase the red dot produced by the laser pointer around Canterlot Castle like a giant cat. A giant pony-sized cat that has the ability to raise and lower the sun with her magic.
Looks like someone misplaced their story.
You accidently put your fic in the wrong group, in the 1000 Likes and Growing group that is. This fic is far from 1000 likes, so it's very premature to put it in there now.
6994955 Oh whoops, sorry about that. I'll remove it immediately
6995476 No problem, just pointing it out.
Artificial Adrenaline
One can of (your preferred flavor) of AMP energy drink
1 bottle of 5 hour energy.
Open the can of ED and drink about a quarter of it.
Wait about five minutes, then add the entire bottle of five hour energy to the AMP can and stir with a shishkabob stick or a spoon if you've poured it into a cup.
Drink contents over the course of fifteen minutes.
Enjoy not being able to sit still for more than three seconds for the next...oh...five or six hours.
BALL!
Here ya go!
Rum Cake Recipe
Rum Cake Recipe:
1 or 2 quarts rum
1 cup butter
1 teaspoon sugar
2 large eggs
1 cup dried fruit
baking powder
1 teaspoon soda
lemon juice
brown sugar
nuts
Before you start, sample the rum to check for quality. Good, isn't it? Now go ahead. Select a large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc. Check the rum again. It must be just right. To be sue rum is of the highest quality, pour one level cup of rum into a glass and drink it as fast as you can. Repeat. With an electric mixer, beat 1 cup butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 seaspoon of thugar and beat again. Meanwhile, make sue that the rum is of the finest quality. Try another cup. Open second quart if necessary. Add 2 arge leggs, 2 cups fried druit and beat till high. If druit gets stuck in beaters, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the rum again, checking for tonscisticity. Next sift 3 cups of pepper or salt (it really doesn't matter.) Sample the rum again. Sift + pint of lemon juice. Fold in chopped butter and strained nuts. Add 1 babblespoon of brown thugar, or what ever color you can find. Wix mel. Grease oven and turn cake pan to 350 gredees. Now pour the whole mess into the coven and ake. Check the rum again, and bo to ged.
Gotcha!
International diplomacy is easy! Chrysalis gets it.
This happens to me sometimes...
And thus, peace between the changelings and ponies was secured in the silliest and most adorable way possible.
This was a sweet and funny story. Not a whole lot else to say, so instead here's an age-old family recipe I don't often share.
This is the most beautiful story I've ever- BALL!
7043583 According to a recent estimate done on the American population, we have proudly concluded that ball is in fact, life.
7043448 Whoa, are you sure you wanna share this age-old, family-valued recipe? What if I like, sell it on the black market? I could make a fortune.
7036625 Unless you're America, then it's
Don't be America, kids.
This is a silly story...
I LOVE IT!
OK, thaaaaaat is about the most adorbs thing ever i have read
Also: recipe!
[youtube=6zqlVJNsI4o]
This is one of the most heartwrenching story I have ever read. I can just feel it speaking to my soul. Also, ball.
I wanted to give you a good recipe for this, but it was too long to be comfortable, so you must be content with googling Gundel Pancake.
[youtube=EbDKN0dk54M]
This. This!
7043448
I see your age-old recipe and I raise you...
Hey, wait a minute...
The Ultimate Diet Cake
2 lbs milk chocolate
8 sticks butter
2 16-oz packages of chocolate chips
3 jars marshmallow fluff
1 tablespoon vanilla
DIRECTIONS:
1. Throw out all ingredients.
2. Eat a piece of celery.
3. Cry.
To damn cute!
7054516 How do you sleep at night knowing you have caused me pain?
Nah, I'm kidding but that did make me laugh. For that, you receive the acknowledgement that a comment of yours has made me laugh. Congratulations, use it wisely.
7043671
This story.
It makes me want to play with my blue ball. :P
7054516
Also, relevant picture is relevant.
orig07.deviantart.net/aa15/f/2014/166/9/8/yarn_ball_by_otakuap-d7mfzwi.jpg
Simple recipe with awesome results!
One pound of ground hamburger meat
One package of taco seasoning (whatever brand you prefer.)
On box of Velveeta mac and cheese (for this recipe use the shells)
First, brown the hamburger meat in a pan.
When the meat hits about halfway done, start cooking the mac and cheese in a pot, separate of the meat.
Cook the mac and cheese normally.
Once the meat is done, mix in the taco seasoning.
After that's done, pour the cheese into the mac and cheese and mix well.
Finally, mix the finished mac and cheese with the taco meat. Stir thoroughly.
Now, you have taco meat macaroni! Easy, decently cheap, and FUCKING DELICIOUS.
You're welcome!
I love this!
its actually pretty cute!