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Kev crested the hill the just as the sun touched the horizon. He stood for a moment, taking in a view that could only be bested by scaling the mountain’s peak. Behind him, the trail wound its way down to the tiny encampment surrounding the mine on the eastern slope. The mineshaft was locked up, as were all of the tools. The rest of the workers had made this same trek home an hour ago while he put away equipment and filled out paperwork. Such was the duty of a manager: working harder and longer for almost no additional pay.
He spread his arms wide and let the remaining sunlight soak into his burly frame. In his mind, his shadow fell on the entirety of Minos. Any minute now, the ground would rumble as beautiful young minotaur women rushed forward to demand his hand in marriage, followed by dozens of business owners that needed his skills more than the blood in their veins.
Kev had been waiting on that stampede for five long years.
Just ahead of him, the trail sloped down a couple hundred paces before widening into the village’s main street. The small collection of huts and stonework buildings looked just as weather-beaten and homely as the mountain they were built on.
The sunlight made its slow retreat across the barren desert separating Minos in the east and Equestria in the west. Officially, the border was somewhere out in the sands. Unofficially, Kev was standing on the edge of minotaur territory, the mountain-side village closest to the pony lands and, in his estimation, the least hospitable.
The only thing worse than living on the sun-parched rocks was having to stare down at the oasis at the base of the mountain’s Equestria-facing side, the only patch of green for tens of miles. Even at this distance, Kev could see neat rows of crops and tiny moving specks that could only be the goats tending them. A few goats also were visible on the steep trail connecting the oasis and the village, most likely carrying back whatever overpriced goods hadn’t sold at the market today. They probably gouged more money out of the town in a day than he made in a week.
Kev turned and spit on the ground. “Money-grubbing, grass-eating…” And then he remembered who he was standing next to.
He knelt by a small pile of boulders and touched his forehead with two fingers. “Hey, Jerek. Come sunrise tomorrow, it’ll be a whole year since you fell down that mineshaft. Crazy, huh? Dana’s doing all right, considering she’s stuck living with her big brother.” He thumped his chest accordingly.
“Tam’s talking all the time, now. Can you believe it? That little guy is turning into a real minotaur; he eats at the table, hardly cries… He even looks like you.”
Shadows crept across the hilltop. Kev took one final look to the east. The fading daylight made the smokestacks of the more industrialized sections of Minos easier to spot. “Too bad Tam’s stuck living on the edge of nowhere. I keep trying to get myself transferred back to civilization, somewhere I can find a wife of my own. Dana and Tam could live with us; she wouldn’t have to work so hard around the house, there’d be more kids his age… all the same stuff I keep telling you.”
He stared at the tiny monument to his former brother-in-law for a moment longer. The tiny stones didn’t do justice to the hulking minotaur they represented, and offered little comfort for the wife and child left behind. “No matter what, I’ll keep taking care of them, Jerek. As long as I’m around, Dana and Tam won’t have anything to worry about.”
---
Kev sunk his teeth into a cooked chicken leg. Juice ran down his neck as he savored the taste. “Where’d you find meat this good, Dana?”
Dana was seated across from him at the table, picking at the other drumstick. She was half a head shorter than him, but every bit as strong. “Eh, it’s all in when you close the deal. You show up in the morning when the grass-eaters are setting up shop, they’ll think you’re desperate. Show up right as they’re packing up all their junk to carry back down the mountain… Maybe there’s a bird or two left that nobody could afford, a big fat one that nobody wants to haul back down the mountain.”
“So you were late to the market, is what you’re saying?”
“Yep. I bought the last bird they had, stuffed it full of butter, and threw it in the oven.”
He chuckled. “Works for me. You let Tam take an extra-long nap, didn’t you?”
“More like I convinced him to take a nap at all. He’s probably getting too old for them.”
“Hah, just like you. Mom always said you’d never sleep.”
Dana rolled her eyes. “She’d probably say it’s payback or something… Ugh. If I can find all the spices and squeeze some extra water out of the goats, maybe I’ll make some of that ‘good sleep’ stew she used to fill us up with.”
“I’m game. I’ll even test out the fermented ‘ingredients,’ make sure they’re potent enough.”
“You wish. Mom’s recipes are all mine; you want to eat, you bring in the money.” Her hands tightened into fists around the chicken bone. “At least the law lets one of us do that.”
Kev knew better than to say anything more. The gold wedding rings on Dana’s right and left hands, one of them Jerek’s, were scuffed and dented by years of hard labor, work that she could never earn a wage for.
Two small hands grasped the table’s edge, and Tam pulled himself onto the chair next to Kev’s. He’d worn the same childlike, near-perpetual smile for years, although the lengthening horns on his head spoke to his steady ascent towards maturity. He set his favorite toy, a little wooden bird that Jerek carved for him, on the table. His bright little face, so full of energy and love, beamed up at his uncle. “Play? Play with me?”
Kev look another bite. “After I’m done eating.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
Tam held the bird overhead and leaped off the chair. “Fly! Fly!”
Dana sighed. “There he goes, getting all wound up right before bed…”
A loud knocking cut through the evening tranquility. Dana and Kev whirled around to see if Tam had run into something, but only found him pointing at the front door with confusion.
Kev walked to the door with the drumstick in hand. He took another bite and opened the door. “Yeah? Who is…”
He had to look down to see her. A pony, a creature no bigger than a goat, stood on his doorstep. Her pale blue fur and scraggly, blood-red mane couldn’t have looked more out of place in a town of goats and minotaurs. Kev stared at her, wondering what to do. His father would’ve chased her away with a club and a string of obscenities. His grandfather would’ve eaten her. His great grandfather would’ve eaten her and not gone to prison for it.
The pony stared up at him.
Kev took another bite of chicken.
Dana came to the door next. “Aren’t you going say someth… A pony?” She raised her eyebrows, the surest sign that she was intrigued. “What do you want?”
The pony spoke words that Kev couldn’t make sense of. Her language was beyond unintelligible; she twisted syllables in ways that his tongue couldn’t possibly manage. Even so, he caught Dana nodding her head as if she understood. “You can understand her?”
Tam grabbed Kev’s free hand and pulled. “All done? Play now? Please?”
The pony paused and gave Kev a nervous glance, as if she could sense some sort of murderous intention on his mind.
Dana nudged Kev away. “Go play with him, I’ve got this.”
Kev retreated to the living room and knelt on the floor next to Tam’s collection of playthings. Tam held up his bird and made tweeting sounds. Kev picked up a toy manticore and roared softly, even though his attention was still fixed on the intruder on his doorstep. What was a pony doing here? Could Dana really understand what she was saying?
The answer came less than a minute later, when Dana gasped. “You want to do what?”
The pony replied in her strange language, but Dana cut her off. “I… I can’t answer that. Come sit at the table and figure it out with Kev. Tam? Time for bed.”
The dreaded ‘b’ word instantly dispelled Tam’s smile. He burst into tears and threw himself on the ground in a dramatic way that only a child could. Dana scooped him up and gave Kev a bared-teeth look that made it clear that she was taking the easier of the two subjects.
As Dana carried Tam away, the pony walked through the living room with her head low and her ears tucked back. She climbed onto one of the table’s chairs, a feat that took twenty seconds and forced Kev to stifle a chuckle. Tam had an easier time scaling the furniture.
She sat there, in Dana’s chair no less, and looked right at him. Kev stared back at her for a minute, wondering how he could possibly break the language barrier he and he alone was trapped behind.
Dana shouted the answer down the hall. “There’s some paper and a pencil on the shelf over the sink!”
Kev’s eyes darted to the kitchen, the corner of his home’s common area that was, for him, largely unexplored. No matter how much Dana hated the total ban on women earning a living, she never shirked the duties that society left her with. Everything in the kitchen, from the plates stacked in the far left cabinet to the hand towels folded on the counter, was just where she wanted it. Challenging the placement of a single knife was likely to result in it being relocated to between his shoulder blades.
He sat down in his usual chair, directly across from the pony. She was giving the bony remains of their chicken dinner a wide-eyed, open-mouthed stare.
“Ponies are vegetarian, aren’t they?”
She nodded without averting eyes from the grisly murder scene.
Kev pushed the serving plate to the far side of the table and slid the paper and pencil to her. “Why can’t I understand the way you talk?”
She opened her mouth and, to Kev’s disgust, grasped the pencil between her teeth. The graphite tip dragged across the paper in surprisingly deft and deliberate strokes. Her lips were better at forming letters than his fingers were. After printing a neat line of text, she turned the paper around for him to read: Pony magic. My name is Morning Dew, and I have something very important to ask of you.
Kev snorted. “Pony magic… I don’t know what you’re even doing on this side of the desert. If this is some sort of charity thing, don’t bother asking. There’s nobody in this whole village with a coin to spare.”
She turned the paper around and wrote some more. I want to live in your village, and I need your help to do that.
“Heh, why? Have you seen this rock? We haven’t even got electricity. Just go back to Equestria. From what I hear, everything’s perfect over there.”
She shut her eyes for a moment, and wrote two more words. I can’t.
“Why not?”
She underlined what she’d just written. I can’t.
Kev sighed. “Dana would’ve moved there already if we had the money… I hate to break it to you—” he glanced at the paper to reread her name “—Morning Dew, but this is a lousy place to live, and a lousy place to… not be male. Minos law says you can’t own property, have a job, or even live with someone who isn’t a relative, so unless there’s goats in your family tree—”
And then he saw what she’d just written: I could live in your house if we were married.
He reread that last word several times before staring her down. She looked away and slid back in her chair.
“Is that a joke?”
She shook her head.
“Look at me!”
Her eyes slowly met his. In them he saw more fear than even her quivering frame could possibly convey. Maybe she thought he really was going to eat her. She took up the pencil again and wrote a new, shaking line of text. Marriage is the only way I can live here. I can’t go back to Equestria, and I don’t want to starve on the streets.
“Who says you’d be any better off in my house? I don’t need another mouth to feed, especially not a freeloading pony.”
Her next line of text wasn’t as shaky, even with Kev’s gaze boring into her. I’m not asking for a handout. I know the goats sell you your water, and that it isn’t cheap. I could hike down to the oasis every day and bring back enough water for all of us. That would more than offset the cost of my food. If you let me live with you, I would save you money.
Kev’s automatic refusal caught in his throat. The only thing worse than the price of water was its absolute necessity. The trail to the oasis was far too steep for wagons, or even walking on two legs while carrying a heavy load. The goats’ stranglehold on the market was unshakable, except perhaps by a pony earning her keep.
A smile crept onto his lips. He could almost see the money piling up, money that the goats would never get their grubby hooves on. He could buy better food. He could buy Tam better toys. He could even save up enough to buy a house somewhere in civilization. Life could get better in almost every possible way.
Then he looked across the table. The price of all that prosperity was sitting right there, and it was a steep one. What would his coworkers say? What would Dana’s friends say? How could he marry a four-legged creature he’d just met who couldn’t even talk to him, let alone give him kids of his own? His stomach churned just thinking about it.
He shut his eyes and pointed to the door. “Go.”
The pencil started moving again, but he shook his head. “Go. Just go.”
Everything was silent for a moment, and then he heard the pony slide off the chair. He opened an eye and watched her leave just as she’d arrived: head low, and ears tucked back.
Dana came running down the hall just as the pony reached the door. Judging by the faint crying coming from her bedroom, she’d cut story time short tonight. She grasped the doorknob and stared at Kev. “Wait. Don’t just throw her out.”
Kev sighed. “Dana, just let her go. Did she actually tell you what she wanted? She wants me to—”
“Yes, and I think you should.”
He stood and stormed over. “What? This is more than wrong, it’s sick!”
Dana’s fiery gaze met his own. “What if it was me and Tam?”
“It’s not. It’s a pony. She can suck it up and go back to Equestria.”
Morning Dew shivered.
Dana growled. “She said she can’t. Would you want me and Tam out there on the street? If you don’t take her in, she’ll starve, get eaten, or… ugh, maybe even end up with a goat. Besides, look at her.”
“I’ve seen her.”
Dana sighed. “Just look, okay?”
Kev rolled his eyes and looked down at their guest. Morning Dew was standing by the door, staring at the ground.
Dana put a hand on his shoulder. “Just pretend you’re looking at a minotaur. Does she look sad to you?”
“Yeah, but—”
Dana’s grip on him tightened. “Wrong. Look at her. Really look at her.”
“Hmpf. Fine.”
Kev knelt down, partly to escape Dana’s grasp, and scrutinized Morning Dew as best he could.
“Pretend she’s a minotaur. Pretend she’s me.” Dana said.
Morning Dew glanced up at him briefly, and then returned her gaze to the floor. In that instant Kev saw it: Dana was right, Morning Dew didn’t look sad. He’d just condemned her to face the night on her own and likely not survive the week, and she’d walked to the door of her own accord. She didn’t protest, she didn’t cry, she didn’t even look surprised. She wore the same frown now as when he’d first laid eyes on her.
Dana spoke in a much softer voice. “What do you see?”
“Fine, she’s doesn’t just look sad. She looks… broken. She looks like nothing good has happened to her in a really long time. She looks… She looks like you did right after Jerek died.”
“Now think about what she’s asking. No matter how horrible a husband she thinks you’ll make, she’s doing it to get away from something worse. Please don’t throw her out.”
Kev sighed. “This still feels sick, but…”
Morning Dew gasped. She looked at him with eyebrows and ears raised up high.
Kev nodded. “You want to live in my house, you live by my rules. When you’re not hauling water up the mountain, you’re helping Dana. When you’re not helping Dana, you’re staying out of my way; you’re not even sleeping in same room as me. The law says either of us can end the marriage at any time, and I will if I don’t like any part of it.”
She nodded repeatedly.
Kev glared at her and held up a fist. “And if you ever hurt Tam, you’re dead.”
She took a small step back, but nodded once again.
“We’ll go to the Magistrate tomorrow before I go to work. We leave at sunrise. Don’t sleep in.”
For the briefest of moments, Morning Dew smiled.
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Well, I was going to go do other things. Most recent caught my attention.
The introductory sentences felt like rather big word blots at first. It gets better, but still. Words presented so that you can't relate to them much, yet.
Like "one hour ago" or especially "surrounding the mine on the eastern slope." I guess it works, but it takes some to mow through the intro.
Otherwise shaping good on a lengthy style. Main hook on story events. Bleak presentation shaping up as there's more to think about, relate to.
Misses a "a"?
Surprisingly??
Not that I'm a real nitpicker. (Pretty sure I wrote "surprisedly" sometimes in my past. Or atleast stuff alike.)
If that's any good show of story to come, I'll have to check this out. Accretion has merits, and this style isn't ubiquitous on fimfic. Nice so far. Toodles.
Yay, it's here! :D
6876002
I had no idea "surprisedly" was a real word…
Thanks for pointing those out!
6876288
It is, and your help getting it here is greatly appreciated
Excellent world-building, but the plot seems a little rushed. No matter, I'm looking forward to reading this one, and finding out just what could have driven a pony away from her homeland without the possibility of return.
Well this is interesting. I wonder why Morning Dew has to flee Equestria.
Interesting start. Looking forward to the rest.
I look forward to learning more about minotaur culture.
Darn I'm intrigued now I have to follow this story.
A most excellent start.
Minators... One of the least featured races, with so much to offer.
You've done well giving us a relatable main character, a family that feels so right, a real society that functions (even if it isn't up to our standards, reminds me of Rome or Greece or Sparta), and several good conflicts.
6876002 I don't think I really comprehend the objections, even after going back and looking at the relevant sentences again. Maybe I'm just a fan of big sentences or something.
6880645
Me too. She isn't making much sense. It's obvious she understands something of Minotaur laws, as presented here.
"held up a first" is probably meant to be "held up a fist".
"She looks like you did right after Jerek died."
Wow, way to throw it out there Kev. The story caught my attention, but that phrase suspended my immersion a little. The idea that he's empathizing with her and somehow failing to empathize, umm, properly. It's either proof Kev has a long way to go, or it sounds far too artificial.