Divine Move

by Ice Star

三 (Enter Silver Lining)

"Hello?" The single word is spoken by a low, timid voice in the background, as I still continue to look over the quiet scenery. Soon it was followed by something along the lines of "What can I do for you, Princess Cadance?"

I wasn't paying attention to what she said, I had turned around and was trying to spot a resemblance between the two. Who was she to that monster?

She was about thirty with a coat like Starswirl's, but with a soft grayer look unlike Onyx's soot colored one. Her eyes were a gloomy dark purple, widened and frozen as they stared at me. Does she think I won't notice? I can see that her mark is sunlight peeking through silvery clouds. Gods I hope she isn't as upbeat as he is. The mare's mane and tail were streaked dark blue and gray-purple like marble and were cut short and like most crystal ponies had silly gold jewelry in it.

She thinks I don't notice that her hoof which holds the door is shaking; she wants to slam the door shut. I know, okay? I'm staring straight at you and still you think I can't see anything, you stupid, stupid mare. You have that in common with him and every other pony.

"What is he doing here?"

There's fear in that tone.

Oh it's nice to know you recognize me, of course. Don't mind me, I'm just the new weatherpony, you can tell by the wings on my back - wait! Wings on my back? I'm finally a princess?! See, I knew it! Purple Eyesore is proof that just anypony can be one. Bow before me mere mortals, all my evil plans have been fulfilled, woe is you!

Pink One is talking to her, I don't see a point in listening since I know that she's just explaining enough so this soft-voiced mare won't scream. Does she secretly have a shrill and grating voice like Onyx? I don't have the patience for that.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to find out exactly who she is in relation to him. Onyx was born twenty-three years ago, so he's technically the one who is 1,123. In truth I'm only 1,110 if I remember correctly, I've always used his age as my own since it makes more sense to explain it that way and we really do share a date of birth, I suppose since I started off at fourteen and kept aging as he would have if he had never cast that spell even if I was still a bit older, he was almost fourteen when he had made the decision. He never aged again and I only stopped when the two Alicorn sisters sealed Onyx and I in ice as a shadow, stuck in some arctic niche that was probably as close to an otherworldly void as I'll ever know. That's over now, and I can still age, and have continued to do so.

But back to this mare, if she's thirty now – which doesn't really matter – she'd obviously have been seven whenever Onyx was born so she's probably a sibling or cousin.

I can't say I ever gave thought to what his family would have been like, but that's not to say I believe that he just sprang into existence like myself. Onyx had no supernatural beginnings. None of the most corrupt or vile creatures ever had special beginnings. The greatest monsters have always walked among the crowds of the blind under the guises of equally sightless eveyponies if they even bother to hide at all.

It seems that the pink one has stopped talking and is coming over here. She had better say something interesting.

"Sombra? Can I talk to you for a minute."

"Only a minute? Surely, I'm worth more attention than that!"

She stares at me dumbfounded for all of these ponies are nothing compared to the sheer power of my ego. "Umm... alright then, so yes Sombra, about a minute."

Yes, I know. You just said that. Is she the only one that can come close to responding coherently and undaunted to anything I say? Where is the wit in these ponies?! They haven't come close to improving anything but food and some of the sciences since I've returned. Alas, it seems pizza is the only creation that isn't completely moronic along with swiveling chairs and trains. All other objects I have encountered aren't really worth mentioning.

Such a sorry list.

"Well what is it? I know that you're as colorful as one of those squawking birds but I don't think I have to command you to speak like one, now do I?"

"No Sombra, I'm not a parrot. All I wanted to say is that Silver Lining was rather reluctant when I brought up that you wanted to talk to her."

"Pink One you truly need to work on your rhetoric, clearly she is petrified and I don't want to talk to her so much as I briefly want to interrogate her."

She shakes her head. "Well that isn't going to be able to happen, I have no idea what your original plan was-"

"Well, my first idea was for you to show up in a top hat and monocle bearing tea and sparkling cider as I belt out the national anthem of Equestria – despite not being able to sing and not knowing the words – as this damned Empire burns. Meanwhile, half the idiotic population of Equestria will be attending the wedding of Princess Lilac Lack-Wit and the King of the Cacti. Years later they will have an entire slew of smaller spine covered purple monstrosities which I will then purge from this world. This will result in me being crowned emperor of all known universes, which makes me His Imperial Highness, the Right-Honorable Lord Sombra the Forever Sarcastic, Duke of Nothing, Emperor of Almost All, Hero of Equestria and Slayer of the Purple Plague and Every Freaking Cactus to Ever Exist. Celestia will explode due to the sheer power of my arrogance and knowing that I have usurped her. The magic from this will somehow create an entirely new color spectrum – don't ask me how the sound of my ego blocks out the speech of all lesser beings – this of course will be eldritch in its own right and sparkle constantly for more reasons that I have no need to specify."

The pink princess gulped. "Sombra, please do me a favor: stay away from soap boxes."

"Perhaps. So what is the current plan?"

She paused and turned around for a moment to see if Silver Lining was there. She was standing outside now, although she still looked flighty when she noticed me. After noting this, Pink One continued talking. "Well, you aren't going to like this-"

"If I'm not going to like it then why are you bothering to tell me? Are you trying to imitate Purple Eyesore?"

"Well you could just listen to me-"

"You're right, I could..."

She's beginning to get visibly frustrated - she breaks eye contact to tuck a bit of her mane behind her ear. "I know you enjoy messing with me and ponies in general but for the next hour or so could you stop?"

"Maybe."

"Ugh, I suppose that's the best I'll be getting from you."

"You are correct."

"Yes, it seems that this is one of those rare occasions that you aren't choosing to be particularly condescending-" She shoots me a skeptical look to which I offer no visible response- "-at least I think so... for now. So what you wouldn't like is that Silver Lining has requested that I stay here as well to act as a mediator-"

"Because it went so well last time? After all, Purple Eyesore and I just became the best of friends."

I'm beginning to wonder just how many times she is going to put her hoof to her face. "Just how often do you plan to remind me of how you almost killed my sister-in-law?"

"As often as I want."

Pink One attempts to glare at me. "Well do you agree with what I can offer?"

"Until further notice."

She continues in her pitiful attempt to angrily glare at me. "Alright then."

After she receives no response - of which I'm often quite generous in - she trots over to the pony known as Silver Lining, most likely to inform her of this. They talk briefly but I'm not close enough to hear. Soon my newest ally waves me over as Silver Lining goes to open her front door. She silently extends a hoof in welcome to Pink One but quite reasonably does not do so for me; I hate such needless extravagances anyway. I hope this goes quickly, time is passing.

Time is running out.

Comments

[Kaleido]

Oh it's nice to know you recognize me, of course. Don't mind me, I'm just the new weatherpony, you can tell by the wings on my back - wait! Wings on my back? I'm finally a princess?! See, I knew it! Purple Eyesore is proof that just anypony can be one. Bow before me mere mortals, all my evil plans have been fulfilled, woe is you!

now *that* would be a tale

Yes, I know. You just said that. Is she the only one that can come close to responding coherently and undaunted to anything I say? Where is the wit in these ponies?! They haven't come close to improving anything but food and some of the sciences since I've returned. Alas, it seems pizza is the only creation that isn't completely moronic along with swiveling chairs and trains. All other objects I have encountered aren't really worth mentioning.

swiveling chairs, trains, and pizza is a great list of modern inventions worth paying attention to

"Well, my first idea was for you to show up in a top hat and monocle bearing tea and sparkling cider as I belt out the national anthem of Equestria – despite not being able to sing and not knowing the words – as this damned Empire burns. Meanwhile, half the idiotic population of Equestria will be attending the wedding of Princess Lilac Lack-Wit and the King of the Cacti. Years later they will have an entire slew of smaller spine covered purple monstrosities which I will then purge from this world. This will result in me being crowned emperor of all known universes, which makes me His Imperial Highness, the Right-Honorable Lord Sombra the Forever Sarcastic, Duke of Nothing, Emperor of Almost All, Hero of Equestria and Slayer of the Purple Plague and Every Freaking Cactus to Ever Exist. Celestia will explode due to the sheer power of my arrogance and knowing that I have usurped her. The magic from this will somehow create an entirely new color spectrum – don't ask me how the sound of my ego blocks out the speech of all lesser beings – this of course will be eldritch in its own right and sparkle constantly for more reasons that I have no need to specify."

oh my
this is an amazing diatribe

Time is running out.

well that's not ominous at all

[MayhemMoth]

Well, wasn't that a mood shift, going from Sombra's spiel of nonsense to something more ominous.

Delighted to know that he has absolutely sat in a swivel chair just to spin in it.

[Ice Star]

10555497
Sombra is based and spooky-pilled. Of course he's sat in a chair just to spin it!