• Published 21st Jan 2016
  • 701 Views, 31 Comments

Herg's House for Homeless Horses - Graglithan The Greater



The North American Continent's been turned into tiny colorful ponies of magic, and some poor kids need new homes now. Until I find them one, they're stuck with me.

  • ...
6
 31
 701

It's a Fixer Upper

Hey there. Yeah that's right, I know you're there. But don't worry none, I've had my time to freak out about it so I won't mind if you have yours. Existential crisis aside, I'm pretty sure we both know why you're here so I'll just go ahead and jump right into it.

It, being my current state of affairs. This mess all started around about two months ago. It was just a regular spring for the world with regular spring time problems. Sneezing constantly during the day when ya have allergies, and the occasional gust of wind. People would go about their days working, relaxing at home, or if they were lucky enough to have the money, going on vacation out of state; sometimes even out of the country for that nice and long Spring Break. I’d have joined them, but I didn’t have any money left after my own expenses. College isn’t exactly cheap, so instead of that nice beach down in California, I was flat broke after finally paying off my college debts and stuck living in a private little apartment by my lonesome. My own stubbornness in regards to getting a loan are to thank for that. Just never really have been able to trust something that’s used to con people out of their hard earned money.

But I’m getting sidetracked a bit. That was just my situation. I’m pretty sure that there were hundreds if not thousands that were like me that day. Just watching the news and learning that a man took an entire tour group hostage, and the next moment the world decided that it didn’t have enough equines in it. Putting it that way sounds a bit confusing, but I honestly can’t think of another way to put it.

Maybe it’d be better to just start the story how that day started. I have a bit of a problem with rambling if you couldn’t tell. I think it got a bit worse when I got turned into a pony. Can't really tell. So let’s just jump to when I arrived at my sister’s home, after she asked me to come by and help her with some renovations and repairs.


Going down the highway, a old and rather beat up Ford was passing by a parade of tall trees. The truck itself was a matching green for each tree it passed. One large dent in the passenger side of the cab, a few windows weren’t very usable due to a poor tinting job that I still haven't gotten my money back from, and a bed that was full of lumber, supplies, and a few tarps to lay out. Inside, an admittedly scrawny man was driving down the road.

What? You thought because I was from Oklahoma I was going to be ripped from farm work or hard labor? HA! I didn’t have a chance in hell to get that kind of body. My genetics made damn sure of that. Now where was I?

I’d been driving for a while after I’d gotten a call from my sister that she needed some help. Apparently, one of the upper floors in her residence had caved in and now she had a hole instead. I know she called me because of a lack of funds, but she’d spent so much on having that building put together and buying the land that it wasn’t surprising. It was around nine in the afternoon by the time I’d gotten into the town that my sister was living in. Why she wanted to keep living next to a college and run an art studio was beyond me, but I’d do anything to help out family.

That’s why I was even bothering to enter Stillwater with my array of tools. College rivalries go pretty far, and I was an OU Sooner all the way. The Pokes can kiss my- Er... distracted again. Sorry.

Anyways, that was the reason I was coming over. While my sis doesn’t actually have any kids living in that building yet, thank god, it was only a matter of time until one or two showed up.

Turning off the highway, I started going down some smaller city roads and passed by a few schools. While most of them were inside and in class, I think a few kindergarteners were out at recess.

A few blocks later, I was finally coming across my sister’s residence and place of business, A rather tall an impressive art studio. The majority of the building was up to city standards. The outside was a nice white wood paneling, and the windows looked like they were in there properly. The front door had a beautifully crafted porch as well. While the door itself wasn't anything special, there was at least a good 30 square feet of wooden floor and ceiling. The eggshell white paint on the railings and steps didn’t hurt any either.

Leading up to the porch was a small dirt path that was lined with a few rose bushes, and fed into a larger clearing that was large enough for about twenty or so vehicles. On the farthest side, I could see my sister’s blue minivan parked facing the building. Pulling in next to her, I chuckled and shook my head. She always said she’d get one, but I never took her seriously. Not very efficient either, considering half the roads up here were dirt.

Grabbing a few bags from the passenger seat of my truck, I slung them over my shoulder and sighed. This job is probably going to take a few days.

“Tyler! You’re here!”

I nearly jumped out of my skin as I turned around and saw my sister standing behind me in her paint splattered overalls. Standing at just over five foot, she easily snuck around when I wasn’t paying attention. “Jesus Sarah! Don't do that.”

Sarah chuckled a bit and brushed some of her blonde hair out of her face. “Sorry Tyler. I forgot how jumpy you could be.”

I just sighed a bit and rubbed my face. “And I forgot how eccentric you could be.” Smiling a bit, I gave my overly affectionate older sibling a hug. “It’s been awhile Sarah. How’s everything?”

She shrugged a bit and shook her head. “It could be better.” Turning to look at the building, Sarah got a slightly far off look on her face. “Nobody comes out here for anything. I’m just out here in the middle of nowhere, with a fancy over-sized house that left me nearly broke.”

“I’m sorry to hear that sis.” I nodded my head with a bit of an understanding smile. “I’m going to assume that’s why you called for my help, rather than hiring someone else?”

“Oh you have no idea.” She grimaced and rubbed her head. “I came back to the building a few days ago after getting groceries, and the private tub I had in the back of the building started to leak. Top that off with how cold it got last winter and I don’t think I’ll be able to live here much longer.” Turning to me with puppy dog eyes, my sister pulled her ultimate tactic. Begging. “Please tell me you’ll be able to help me?”

I tried. I really did, but in the end I sighed a bit and rubbed my head in defeat. “Well, I’ll go ahead and take a look and let you know what needs fixed. I can’t guarantee that you’ll like the cost though.”

She smiled and sighed while wrapping me in a small hug. “I figured you’d say that. I’ll even let you stay here while you work on everything. I have a spare cot up in the chapel we can bring down to let you sleep where you like.”

Giving her a pat on the head, I couldn't help but chuckle. “Alright alright, let’s head in and I’ll see what’s needed.”

Now let’s take a moment and let me take a guess at what you’re thinking. It’s probably “Where’s this big old disaster you were going on about?”, or, “Why should we care about this?”, or even, “Where are all the ponies?”

Well to answer your question, I’ll tell you what happened next.

As I stepped inside the building, my head was starting to itch real bad. I wouldn’t have paid it much attention, but Sarah also gasped a bit from behind me. “Um... Tyler?”

“What is-?” Turning around to face my sister, I had to stop and share the same look of shock on her face. “Sis, what’s with your head?” Sticking out of the top of her head, were a pair of peach horse ears. I reached up just as she did, and found the same had happened to me.

That’s pretty much where my day just decided to take a dump on my head.

The next minute or two consisted of the both of us turning into a pair of technicolor ponies. Sarah was only about three and a half foot tall by the end of it, and her clothes were dangling off of her. I didn’t know freckles would be something that strange magical transformations took into account, ‘cause hers stayed on her face.

I wasn’t much better. Gone was the lanky man, and in his place was a equally lanky stallion. After we spent a good deal of time freaking out, Sarah and I both stayed in her house and just huddled for a while. Even as we kept wondering about what had happened to us, a few hours of letting the TV run alerted the two of us to a news announcement. According to a new caster who had also got turned into a horse, It was much more widespread than just the two of us. Some sorta government organization was claiming responsibility for causing this entire fiasco, saying magic and all that madness was real.

And at this point, I didn’t really have any arguments for that. I mean.... turned into a horse not even two weeks ago, so..... yeah. Both of us looked like hell when we finally exited Sarah's home, and the town didn't look much better. I mean, a week of panicking and crazed college students, plus whatever biker gang had decided to stay at the bar, and lets not forget the fact that about twenty five percent of the town's population are religious and elderly retirees thinking the world's ending, all of which got turned into horses with only a few knowing even slightly what's going on.

Needless to say, there was a lot of property damage all around. I also lost my job at the local dealership, which.... kinda was a given. I did stay off the clock for over a week, and my boss was a bit of an asshole.

Anyways, that about wraps up how this madness started. Just going to fix my sister’s home, and then boom, everyone’s a horse. Life’s been a bit strange since, and we’ve been handling it as best we could. Sarah somehow can still hold a pencil and brush, and for some god awful reason my voice got a touch deeper and a bit more southern.

More specifically, both of us were turned into "Earth Ponies" as a lot of the town referred to us as. As some form of cosmic joke, the same happened for most of the town. My own fur was an unnatural rust red. My hair at least stayed the same shade of brown, but my eyes had turned a vibrant amber. I'll admit, I spent a bit longer staring at the mirror then I should have. My sister on the other hand only had the real addition of peach fur. Her hair stayed as blonde as ever, and her eyes still rival oceans. Doesn't help that they're bigger now too.

I also learned that for some reason or another, we have "Cutie Marks".... dear god I want to slap whoever came up with the term, but they're probably already dead. A lot of the town I've spoken with that know more then I do said that they represent one's "Special Talent", and if that's truly the case, it hit the nail on the head for my sister and I. She's got a pencil drawing a sketched and shaded heart, and I've got a old handsaw and hammer.

So that brings me to where I currently am; Staying with my sister and learning how to use my tools again as I fix up the damage to her home. Speaking of which, the damage is actually a bit sad to even talk about. These complete dumbasses didn’t even build the house up to code! There was absolutely no insulation in the roof, or the wall! The tub they’d "installed" had seven loose pipes that weren't even needed, and don’t even get me started on all the electrical work that needed fixing. This house is a damned nightmare, and if I ever find the jackoffs that built it, I’m tearing them a new one!

Regardless, I just hope that life doesn’t throw me anymore curve balls anytime soon. It’s hard enough using a jigsaw with hooves. I don’t want to know what else she can dish out.

Author's Note:

And HOLY guacamole, I finally finished a Chapter! So here we are everyone! The first chapter to my newest story. As this is a side story to the "Cool Story Bro, Needs More Ponies" trilogy I would suggest going and reading them first. It'll help explain just what's going on where Tyler here fails to.

Cause really, cut the guy some slack. He's a builder, not a story teller.:rainbowlaugh:

Either way, ENJOY AND COMMENT! Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get to work on a banner, AND the next chapter.