• Member Since 25th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen Yesterday


"Oh right I have an account on here" — Me, recently


Rainbow Dash wakes up one morning to warm sheets, the lovely chirping of birds, and sunshine on her scales. She flexes her claws and lets out a yawn that lights up the room.


Patreon (NEW): https://www.patreon.com/Kyle_67

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 95 )

Oh, this'll be fun.

It will indeed...

It has to be! The insane scenarios, starting in a bed, it all adds up! Or else I'm stuck in a time loop of some sort; Twilight tried to convince me to read a story she wrote a while back on the matter. But that's fiction...

I understood that reference.

Comment posted by Chrome Masquerade deleted Sep 4th, 2016

7537413 Maybe in mythology, but Spike always refers to his hand as having claws, like getting a "claw cramp". And Spike's a (baby) dragon, so I just went off of that. Plus, just look up "rainbow dash dragon" on google images; most artists separate the nail and the appendage, indicative of a claw.

She annoyed Owlicious, had some fun with Angel, and had a therapy visit with Gummy... :rainbowlaugh: Good lord...

I'm actually rather enjoying this. It's a bunch of silly stuff that is also giving a bit of a look into Dash's character as well, with how she is trying to take advantage of the situation only to find herself swept along it from the surprises.

I'm glad I clicked on this one. :twilightsmile:
Let's see, ideas...
What about having her turn into a turtle so she can talk with Tank? Get an inside scoop on how he feels about her?

Oh man!! This is good!! :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: What about a griphon? Or a draconeques?(however its spelled) :rainbowlaugh:

Gummy the therapist.

...Why does that make so much sense?

In short: i.memeful.com/media/post/PM0nrdL_700w_0.jpg

Especially during Angles scene. JFC that got me on the floor begging for mercy.

Wow, this is rough, it reads almost like an incident report, please show, don't tell.

7538175 Well, this is First Person present tense, meaning I want the reader to fully understand every specific emotion. RD is the one telling the story, so the more I can nail down her exact emotion into specificity, the more the reader connects with her.
Here's an example.

Say I have RD slump over after, say losing a race. This is too broad in the first person, because I can only describe RD's actions through one lens: her's. Slumped over could indicate both defeat and sadness, two slightly different things with an important difference when in the realm of first person. In third person, I could describe what the scene looks like from an outside perspective, but I only have the emotions of RD to communicate the tone. It is better to say that she slumped over in defeat, as that nails down the feeling.

First person, present tense is tricky to write in but is the best for a story built on surprises, where the reader is finding out about things at the same time as the main character. As much as I would love to set the tone of a room or describe RD in terms of her actions, its hard to do when A.) I can only tell story through RD's perspective and B.) the story is happening as the reader is reading the story. I could absolutely do better, you are right, and I wholeheartedly appreciate your honest criticism. :twilightsmile:

Moments away from impact, I close my eyes and pray for survival.

Don't worry, you'll land on your feet. Plus, you have nine lives anyhow.

7538175 I know what you mean, but it's hard to show with words.

I hope you continue writing, it is amazing. My reaction at the end of each dream is just laughter! I do have one suggestion for a transformation dream, Phoenix.:yay:

gryphon, phoenix, mouse, squirrel, snake

Wait, am I... blushing?

rabbits. :facehoof:

Love this but just one possible plot hole can't fluttershy speak to animals
How about a mantacore

Y'know, waking up with 20 notifications has been my dream as a writer for a long time. From the bottom of my heart, thank you all for enjoying the story as much as you have. :twilightblush:


It's the best feeling isn't it? :twilightsmile:

This Story is really Goooood!
7539561 You Deserve them! In a good way...

7539813 Holy shit, this was featured? When?

Comment posted by Spiral_Donut deleted Sep 8th, 2016

7539375 Found an Undertale reference.

Guess she can pick which one now.

I kind of want to see parasprite!Dash.

This spells certain doom in the future. :pinkiecrazy: There's gotta be a catch to all of this.

I believe Louis is a reference to the gator from The Princess and the Frog.

The only thing I can think of for Allie is the Ty beanie baby.

Next wakeup, why not have Dash becoming Twilight the Alicorn...:rainbowwild:=:twilightsheepish:...and run into the real Twilight?:twilightsheepish::twilightoops:

7542200 Haha, actually, I got the name Allie from Where's my Water. It's the only video game 'starring' alligators I could think of, though I don't play it.

Swell that certainly s intesting twist on animal tfs. Lol I guess you can make funny voice from slogs of life canon

I can imagine her going with Philomena to prank others. Especially the owner...:trollestia:

What Have you Done Rainbow Dash?:pinkiegasp:

Edit: Also Congrats you were Actually Featured This time

I think everyone knows that a structure like the crystal palace is asking to be toppled over.

Ah. There's the consequences. What you done, Dashie? :facehoof:

Mother of Celestia, somepony give this bitch a medal. A random, silly as hell story Im actually amused by.

Carry on.


I stand up. "I believe I do," I call out. "It is my opinion that we should attack the Crystal Empire," I say, j

I am to bang head to wall!! Yes thank!!!

Seriously!! WHAT!?! What is wrong with all these ponies!?!
I eagerly await more!! (So that I can figure out what the buck just happened)

how about next time she wakes up as a Chimera? then she would have to literally deal with herself :rainbowhuh:? :rainbowderp:! :rainbowkiss:

Why is no one curious as to why Shining Armour, prince of the Crystal Empire, wants to blow up his own house?

Insurance fraud??

Next cycle:

Celestia catches Rainbow Dash driving golf balls from her balcony into Luna's bedroom window....

This is a good story, but, um... It seems like eventually Dash is gonna realize that if the days keep resetting, she's not gonna be able to have a normal life. Or are the days not resetting anymore? I'm very confused.

Login or register to comment