• Member Since 30th Jan, 2014
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

RS-Belle14


I'm the best at what I do: being late. I also write stories, commission art, and translate between English and Spanish.

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This year, the ponies decide to play Secret Hearth's Warming. Everything is all fine and dandy, but when Sweetie Belle draws Spike's name, her friends keep bothering to finally tell him how she feels.

So, this is my first fan fiction ever. I would like to dedicate this story to my friend who unfortunately passed away before I could finish it. Special thanks to my other friend for proof reading it. I hope to get better with experience.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 41 )

That was nice.

6769800 Thank you. It's my first.

The fluffiness almost killed me. I hope to see more from you.

6770825 Thank you so much for the support. If enough people really like my story, I'll definitely make more.

Now they need approval of their parents.

6770991 Ha As if Twilight's special books and Rarity's talks weren't enough.

Cute. But you need someone to edit it for ya. Shall I have a go or do you already have one?

6771539 I have a friend who proof reads for me already, but another editor wouldn't hurt.

Heartwarming, it is really fantastic

6772095 Thank you so much. I'm really glad you like my story.

Great Story man. And I'm sure where ever your friend is, he's proud what you're doing. :twilightsmile: Happy Holidays and keep up the good... :applejackunsure: no, keep up the GREAT work. :rainbowdetermined2:

6773964 Thank you. That means a lot. I never did tell him I watch MLP. I hinted it to him, but the old man never figured it out. I hope he knows now.

This looks sweet. :heart: :twilightsmile:

6781735 Thanks. I hope you enjoy.

This was definitely a great read. You really made this seem real to the point believing that this is what they would actually think. And from how you wrote it, it seemed like you could have easily made a story centering Spike and it would be just as good.:ajsmug:

The only thing I would have to say I would like to see a bit more is character exposition. There was quite a bit more dialogue than the characters actually doing things. Simple movements like Sweetie rolling her eyes, Scootaloo fluttering her wings in excitement, or Spike merely rubbing his arm in nervousness could really bring your story to even better levels. It's small things like those that can make a story even greater.:moustache:

But regardless, it is still a great read and will be added to my favorites.:twilightsmile:

10 out of 10 for Romance (cuteness made it get from 9 to 10)
10 out of 10 for Slice of Life
9 out of 10 for grammar
9 out of 10 for overall story.
Definitely worth a like and a fave.:rainbowderp:

6885715 Thank you! I'll try to incorporate your suggestions on the story I'm currently working on.

That was fun and fluffy! Great job. :moustache::unsuresweetie:
And 50 Shades, strikes again! :rainbowlaugh:

6970913 Thank you! And just thought I'd use Fifty Shades before it's completely forgotten.

This was not as good as the Birthday ome but it is strange that when reading this Scootaloo gives Rainbow a Daring Do rare book and in my one I give her the same gift. :rainbowderp::rainbowlaugh: It looks like I'm just stealing from everyone now, even the stories I haven't read yet. That gonna count for something.

7034514 This was my first fan fiction ever, so it's only natural some people would prefer my newer ones. Me personally, I love both this and Birthday. I can't decide which I love more.

This was a very sweet story. I usually ship Spike with Rarity, but I liked this story anyway. :twilightsmile: Tell me, are Hondo Flanks and Cookie Crumbles the canon names of Rarity and Sweetie Belle's parents, or did you make those up? Also, do you like 50 Shades, or were you making fun of it?

7212858 From what I read on the Wiki and the card game, Hondo Flanks and Cookie Crumbles are indeed their canon names. And yes, I was just poking fun at 50 Shades. I don't think I could ever bring myself to pick up that book :twilightblush:. Thank you so much for the read.

7212869 Got it. What have you heard about 50 Shades?

7212873 Just whatever Cinemasins told me. I get the general idea of it, and I just wanted to add it in as a joke.

7212876 Why don't you think you'll ever pick it up?

7212882 It's just something I'm not really interested in.

7212894 Eeyup. But it does make for a nice throw away joke.

How did this end up in the Equestria Girls group under the Twilight Sparkle folder if its about the ponies?

7410951 I didn't know it was there. It must've been an accident. I'll try to have it removed. Thanks for pointing it out.

7410951 It's been removed from that folder. Thanks for pointing that out to me.

This is what I thought of when I read about her plushie (I know its the wrong universe but its all I got)

http://uotapo.deviantart.com/art/Bucket-Ice-Cream-Challenge-622285369

7413746 Ha. Love that picture. Uotapo is one of my favorite Deviant artists. Yeah, I can see where you got that idea from. I (and perhaps even Uotapo) actually got the idea from Friends Forever #13, where Sweetie Belle officially has a Spike plushie.

Loved it! Great story. I loved the book that Pinkie got Luna. I laughed really hard at that :rainbowlaugh: too funny!

7413937 Ha, Thanks. I was just having fun with that idea and decided to go along with it. Glad I did :twilightsmile:

I'm sorry about your friend.

7622574 Thank you. I'm sure he's fine now. His birthday is coming up.

Good story. I don't ship much of anything in MLP but I enjoyed this. :twilightsmile:

If you wanna know I do ship Spike/Smolder and Starlight/Sunburst. :twilightsmile: Those are the only two I ship LOL. :rainbowlaugh:

Comment posted by Starbrand Fan deleted Oct 13th, 2020
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