• Member Since 3rd Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen 25 minutes ago

Awesomo3000


Pony fan. Film buff. Cartoon lover. Superhero nut. Transformers freak. Impressionist. Actor. Singer. Deadpan snarker. S'all good.

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Applejack abandons her pie deliveries out of worry and goes back to check on her little sister who's home alone. As a result, she winds up acting extremely over-protective to Apple Bloom, to the point of stalking her.

But what if, instead of sneaking out to make the pie deliveries herself, Apple Bloom snapped and said something in a fit of anger that cut deep into her sister's soul?

An alternate take on Somepony to Watch Over Me

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 31 )

That line with Apple Bloom would cut deep, especially if we didn't see the Perfect Pear in the first place (or maybe after seeing it too).
This was really good. Liked reading it.

I love these "What If?" scenario structured stories, they're always great. 😃

You made an awesome and heartwarming story out of one of my least favorite episodes!

"Do I need to remind you about all the risky stuff I've done in the past? Like walking through Ponyville all by myself? Or applebuckin' out in the fields with you and Big Mac? Or when I helped wrangle that army of Pinkie Pie clones? Or how about the times I've gone through the Everfree Forest to visit Zecora on my own?” With each piercing question, Applejack anxiously took a step back from her advancing sibling.

Yeah...

“Heck, what about all those times I've gone out and explored different skills with the Cutie Mark Crusaders like diving or mountain climbing or zip-lining? Or when me and Sweetie Belle got pulled along by Scootaloo all the way to the Crystal Empire? Huh? Do those just not count for anything?”

Technically AB, that wasn’t an actual mountain to begin with:twilightsheepish:.

"Who cares what you want for me? YOU'RE NOT MOM!"

Ouch...:fluttershysad:.

“Now it’s true that every sibling does need their share of space.” She said, giving Applejack a small kiss on the forehead. “To have room to grow and discover things for themselves.” Her loving smile returned as she directed the filly’s attention to Apple Bloom once again. “But just because she won’t need you mindin’ her all the time, that don’t mean she’ll never need you. You may be growin’ up but you sure as pie still need Big Mac to help you from time to time." Applejack's smile came back briefly as she realised the truth to that.

Truer words have never been spoken Pear:pinkiesmile:.

What do I want for her? I want her to grow into a strong pony. And to do that, I need to stop being a bodyguard.

Yes, exactly:twilightsmile:.

“Applejack, I…” She paused, biting her lip before continuing in a melancholy tone. “I’m real sorry I snapped at you. I shouldn’t have said what I sai…”

It’s alright AB, I forgive you:pinkiesad2:.

“I guess I was letting the past get ahold of me and not let go.” She began to smile warmly as her sister allowed her to place a foreleg around her shoulder. “I realise that you’re growin’ up, Apple Bloom. And I’m so proud that you’re accomplishin’ so much each day. By yourself and with your friends and family beside ya. Any filly that can do those kinda things sure doesn’t need me constantly lookin’ over their shoulder. You’re not a baby anymore and I shouldn’t be treatin’ you like one. I won’t hold you back but that doesn’t mean I’ll stop bein’ your sister. And when you do need me, I promise I’ll be there.”

Apples to the Core:rainbowdetermined2:!

“We’re always good.”

Reference to the actual episode:ajsmug:.

“My little sister really is all grown up.”

She is, she really is...:heart:.

9062837
Me too, I’m actually planning to do a series regarding that:raritywink:.

9062989

Cool. 😄 I'm thinking of posting this MLP horror story I had in mind for a while. ^^

“What If” stories are usually hit or miss. This one however hit the bullseye.

Bittersweet cute. Rather well written, especially in regards to the small backstory behind Buttercup and Bright Mac. I also added this story to a few groups for you, so enjoy that.

Oh the feels were so damn strong & well written too. This is "What if" one-shot makes me wish that this had happened, instead of what we got.

9063123

I'm a post a preview of it in a blog sometime. 😄

9063308
I posted a preview blog just now, but it's not the horror story, it's for my main MLP story I thought of for 3 years. 😄

9063344
Thanks. 😊 I'll post the horror story preview hopefully soon. ^^

( I see you use the pony emojis, I'm probably the only one that doesn't like using those XD )

This is the kind of character development I crave for the show. This is so well written.

This should’ve been the ending for the episode

Is the title a play on Slipping Through my Fingers and by extent a reference to the ABBA song of the same name???

9064724
DING DING! We have a winner! :raritywink:

You took a cringy episode and made it into something very heartwarming and feelsy. Well done.

Holy cow this was an amazing story to read. I'm kinda half and half on the actual episode, but found this to be awesome. If this had actually happened in the actual episode, I would've loved it.

Man, I hate that it took me so long to get to reading this story.

Great work, man, really excellent stuff.

9080726
It's okay, glad you enjoyed it and that your trip went well. :twilightsmile:

Fuller review here, but in brief: definitely preferable in my book to the show's take on this. I liked the flashback, but felt there was a bit too much of it. The "single tear" is a huge cliché too, but for the most part this is pretty readable stuff.

Comment posted by Creativa-Artly01 deleted Oct 13th, 2018

I. AM. SOBBING. :raritycry::raritycry::raritycry:

This is Exactly how I feel about my little girl growing up, and the same advice my mom gave me. Plus the Mamma Mia reference is so badass. This story really touched something deep inside of me. You really captured the bond AJ had with Buttercup. I applaud you, and all of your hard work. This is truly a masterpiece. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. It really does make everything so worth it. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Here, have a baby Dashie.

static.planetminecraft.com/files/resource_media/screenshot/1231/DashieHugTime_3073120.jpg

This would have been a better ending. Well written. :pinkiehappy:

Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what's in her mind
Each time I think I'm close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time..
..
Replace fingers with hooves...
What it made me think of!

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