• Member Since 2nd Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen Last Thursday

Thread Necromancer


Sticks and stones may break my bones. If I have fucking Osteoporosis.

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Princess Celestia doesn't like how humans deal with their problems, so she decides to do something about it. That something is an invasion attempt. She starts in what appears to be an old, abandoned town but soon learns this is the home of 2 deadly and ruthless human groups.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 98 )

Wow,just wow.:pinkiehappy:

Can't tell if racest or funny as hell

that with the scooter was a good one i have to give you that point oh and you can also use a shovel as an improved axe and you can hit others with it on the head which can be really deadly

6756425 in ww1 and 2 shovels where used as meleee weapons china still does and china even has a special military shovel

If that's your first story, then I pretend you write more. 'Cause when I red it I jizzed in my pants.

That is how it is done in the hood

6756490 not many know that but you should see a video to the chinese military shovel that thing even has a grappling hook and maybe dozens of other functions those asians sure can be creative

6756839 That's how I know about it.

“‘CUS WE BLACK!” exclaimed a woman in red. “Biomestry taught me dat darker colors obsorb light.”

Probably the best Deus Ex Machina I have ever heard.

6756880 funniest thing i ever did read.

6756880 seriously you know that video too?

The humans emerged victorious. Celestia was furious “What a bunch of useless soldiers. Fine, I guess I will deal with you myself!” Her horn glowed and a blinding beam shot out. She swept it through the crowd but when she stopped, no one seemed affected. “Impossible…” she said with her jaw hanging lower than most of her enemies’ tax balances. “How did you-?”

“‘CUS WE BLACK!” exclaimed a woman in red. “Biomestry taught me dat darker colors obsorb light.”

what

Seriously, this ought to be comedy tagged. That line was just too hilarious.

As a black American, I approve of this story.

6757222 Mhm. It's a shovel with like 200 uses.

6757511 You're talking to the person you claimed is "...not as funny as you think you are" literally a couple days ago.

6757897
I do not see the problem.

6757882 the swiss army knife in the shovel buisness

I GOT MA REAL NIGGAS HEA BY MA SIDE

Pour out some liquor for the real niggaz.

If Pirus and Crips...all got along..

..they'd probably gun me down by the end of the song.

This is stupidly amazing.

Such niggatry, it's so powerful!

"mommy, what is this?"

The infamous “scooter-savage” fearlessly charged into the brawl. He swung the scooter’s platform around the the axis and plowed through soldiers, smashing the handlebars into heads and swinging the edge into exposed ankles, leaving many soldiers lying on the ground and clutching their hooves, holding back tears.

that was me in a nutshell.

omg... this... so much yes :rainbowlaugh:
Hahahaha

This was mother fucking awesome this bitch got burned messing with the wrong gang

This would make a great song

7151213 I could imagine someone makes a rap song based on this story.

This was ultimately fucking beautiful as hell

I'm offensive, and I find this... wait, no. That doesn't work.

I'm a stereotype and I think this is... uh. Gah that doesn't sound right either!

You know what? This was just funny. Blatantly, outrageously, lungs-burning-because-I-was-laughing-so-hard-while-reading-it funny.
For a first story, you really nailed it with the silliness. Nice one.:rainbowlaugh:

fucking ridiculous. Love it and forever will. :rainbowlaugh:

What is...

but...

I can't logic this.

i.imgur.com/9iWz8ii.jpg

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST READ?!
media.giphy.com/media/hmQqA7vgZK716/giphy.gif

7280003 You actually listened to me and skipped the whole first chapter didn't you?

Edit: Nevermind, I guess I really do have an unjust hole in my story... WAAAAA-

You came to the wrong neighborhood, mothafucka. Us humans are really good at inventing ways to kill.

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