• Member Since 8th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Saturday

TechnoViking


T

After the kids are put to bed Rainbow decides she and her husband might be a little over due for some time alone.

Rated T for suggestive themes, although nothing actually happens.
A short one shot for the MacinDash fanfic contest set well into their married life, following prompt B.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 10 )

Really cute :D

Glad to be a first edition to the fic contest

Just means that both of them will be even more eager the next time around.

D'awwww!!! I really like this!!! Great job!!!!!! I love the way you had Mac and Dash interact. It's totally how I imagine them! And that little girl is so cute! :rainbowkiss:

6753178 Thanks, happy to contribute.
6753246 Maybe that will be the sequel, as well as my first mature fic haha.
6753615 Thank you very much, your kind words are greatly appreciated.

Love the story and the song that inspired it

Very, very well done stoty! I think I know the song this was inspired by. Beautiful job and hope to see more of this pairing from you.

6755316 ,6761620 Thanks glad you enjoyed it, I'm also happy to see a few people knew what song inspired it. I was going to put the song in my Author's note, but I wanted to see if anyone else recognized the title haha.

6761708 Well its a great story all around. The only thing I would. Hanger is when Mac says "Miss Dash, are you trying to seduce me?" Rainbow should have gone,

"Not trying... I am"

6763036 that would have been a good line.

Just three errors:

1:

What can I say, I'm the fun parent they have a hard time taking me seriously,

I would put a period after 'parent'.

2:

stared into those striking violet eyes.

Violet?:rainbowderp: I hope you mean magenta:twilightangry2:.

3:

Why Miss Dash are you trying to seduce me?

I would write "Why, Miss Dash, are you..." because commas are important.

beyond that, really good job sir! The story is well written and fluffy, a real pleasure to read.

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