• Member Since 4th May, 2015
  • offline last seen Feb 5th, 2017

EbonyDanger


That one fan of MLP, who makes her plot way darker and complexer then intended. And the person, who roleplays more then she writes fanfiction. *ON A WRITING HIATUS FOR NOW*

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Just one mistake. Twilight had underestimated Nightmare Moon. When she reaches the map and tries to preform the spell again, a powerfull blast seperates her and Spike from the scroll, which lands somewhere in the bushes. Twilight and Spike get captured in seperate places. Now the Alicorn has to find a way to get out of the dungeons, let alone save Spike. Twilight knows, she needs more information on this world. And what role do Mademoiselle Rarity and Captain Rainbow Dash play? Can they help her? Can Twilight befriend these harsh two to get a way to freedom? And will Nightmare notice?

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 45 )

Rainbow just doesn't sound anything like Rainbow, alternate timeline or otherwise.

6693078
Counterarguement: Rainbow does not greet Twilight with open arms when she enters her world. So why should she be like the Rainbow of the show? She has become rather cynical in my view because of the environment changes.

I'm having a hard time deciding what the main tag is here, aside from AU.

Is it Slice of Life, Drama, or Dark?

It would really help to know, so that I can put in the correct folder in my group.

6693757
Difficult to say. I am guessing Slice of Life. Maybe you can decide it better when the story progresses. What is your group?

6693817 Nightmare's Reign

A group dedicated to NMM's timeline from the season finale.


I don't think Slice of Life really belongs in this kind of story, I think adventure/thriller/mystery would fit better.

Also think that having both the sad and dark tags are unneccessary, just pick dark and be done with it. If it's dark, then we expect some disheartening things to occur, but I highly doubt that the entirety of this story will have a sad undertone throughout it.

Not too bad i'll be keeping track of this story for the time being.

6693844
Yeah. I guess, I will have to work out the taggs yet.

6693948
Thanks. I am glad you like the start.

6693979 I'll put into the 'Thriller' folder for now.

Forgot to mention, drama doesn't work for this story either.

Slice of Life/Drama each fit a specific kind of story, and this one isn't it. This is more of a dark thriller type fic.

It'll have drama I'm sure, but when people see the drama tag, they think of a fic along the lines of personal/family/friend drama.

6694005
Thanks. The new taggs are a bit confusing for me. Still have to get used to them.

6693645
Cynicism is fine.

"
Your naivety is surprising.”

Is just not a mannerism that fits her. It fits Rarity.

But whatevs

6694121
Okay. Yeah, she uses this term. I could not think of something else. Sure, she could say How can you be so stupid or something like that.

Here's what bugs me, and I blogged about it. It's not your fic that bugs me, but this specific plot point:

Luna and NMM are always treated as separate entities. Reality? THEY AREN'T.

Hey, Twilight, maybe try to see how deep your friendship with Luna was in the previous timeline by trying to appeal to her current self, hm? WANNA TRY THAT?!

6694156
Yes, I know. I am dealing it that way. But we have to remember: When NMM returned in the season one start, she was not really nice. In fact she planned on overtaking the planet. She was not the Luna, that we come to love in the show. And in this story she serves as the antagonist! I will maybe include Luna, but not now. However my story might open an opportunity to explore, what you demand. Twilight offers her services for Spike's freedom to Nightmare Moon. She will be able to interact more with her, Rarity and Rainbow. Also Nightmare recognices Twilight's intelligence in a scene later and becomes interested in her.

6694614 *salute and thumbs-up* Okay then.

6694618
Yeah, but this will come later. Just try to be patient. I mean, the story is two chapters long. We cannot have a big jump of character development in two chapters, can we?

6694622 Nah, we can't. XD I'm just saying that in general, not in the fic, such a plot-point just gets annoying to me. It's a reason I hated the whole Nightmare Rarity comic.

6694630
I see. However if I recall it right, Lauren Faust had a similiar idea. But I think it will be a nice opportunity to me, because I am usually going this way as well as it allows for certain ways of conflicts. But I am always willing to try new stuff. That is also the reason, Rainbow is such a bitch in the first chapter. I need to find out how to write for her properly.

6694633 Rainbow, Rarity, and so forth all experienced a literal world of different circumstances. *shrug* So, why should I feel offended? I don't. XD

6694643
True, But someone wrote in a comment:

Rainbow just doesn't sound anything like Rainbow, alternate timeline or otherwise.

And such comments always give me the urge to explain myself. Just like I had to state that I do not hate Derpy in a monologue, because I called her a miserable flyer.

img05.deviantart.net/49a0/i/2015/270/3/f/no_spike_no_by_hillbe-d9b6ejc.jpg

Why would I consort with dragons let alone with you?:duck:
:moustache: loads of gems?
:raritywink: go on. . .

6695214
Lol. And how does this have to work with the text?

6697687 Alt Rarity says "I don't consort with dragons...." is from the episode. poor Spike gets slammed.

pre12.deviantart.net/5c2b/th/pre/i/2015/325/8/5/bed_time_story_by_hillbe-d9hkh8m.jpg

:moustache::raritywink:

:twilightoops: that's it? gems!:facehoof:

6698012
Didn't she say I don't socialize with dragons? Well, nevermind, I finally got it. And seriously her sentence must be like a slap in the face to Spike.

6700340 that season finale with the Nightmare Princess was brutal for the little dragon Rarity turned her flank to him as those lines were said "I don't consort with dragons . . ." at least he was helping her in the boutique at the end......now the hiatus



img10.deviantart.net/8be7/i/2015/321/b/7/run_ii_by_hillbe-d9h136o.jpg

Why does Rainbow think the elements aren't real, when NMM indirectly stated they were real right in front of her?

6716240
Because she has never seen them. And the Elements were gone for such a long time that most ponies regard them as folklore. And she is no exception.

6716692
Captain Obvious strikes again! And yes, you are right.

6717998
So what is essentially confirmation from Nightmare Moon herself isn't enough? /shrug

Can't wait for the next chapter :)
Btw do you have a link to the original artwork??

“Had a long Period, eh?”

“Yes, my Period was eventful, but yours seemed even more”

I guess the eternal night is affecting everybody's natural cycles, huh? :rainbowlaugh:

6764593
Lol. Okay, this word is simply meant as span of time, but period as a cyrcle also works. XD

I wonder what would happen if they all refused to work and demanded their immediate freedom? I'd rather die than live as a slave.

6851783
Oh, dear. Nightmare Moon will not grant her enemies a physical death. That would be way too easy.

6867547 She can't run a kingdom if people are so terrified by nightmares that everything is chaotic and disorganized, either.

6872706
Sure. But what if she only uses these methods once in a while?

6878282 I don't know. Something. But resistance can't be dead, considering that all the plants (and thus all the food) are dying from a lack of sunlight.

6879116
Well, I doubt that. In the finale it is made clear that Nightmare ruled for years. So she has a way to keep everything alive. For example the Everfree Forest. Also the ponies can spare their strengths to renew her castle.

Do you know when the next chapter will be posted??

There's one thing that's metaphorically bugging me: where is Starlight at the moment? I mean, Twilight is stuck in this timeline for now, and I wonder where Starlight would be in this timeline?

I wouldn't be surprised if she took a shot at Nightmare Moon at the Summer Sun Celebration. She was terribly short-sighted at some things.

Why is it cancelled

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