• Member Since 18th May, 2012
  • offline last seen Jul 6th, 2014

Soarin Altiss


E

This is not only my first fan-fic, but the first story that I've actually written!

It seems as if every mare in Equestria is throwing themselves at him, every mare that is except the one he truly wants. A handsome and carefree young stallion, Soarin’ is finding life as a Wonderbolt and a bachelor difficult. As far as relationships go, nothing ever goes the way he would like. Eventually things do start going his way for once. The blue Pegasus soon discovers, however, that love has other plans in store.

IMPORTANT NOTE: This pony right here, NinjaBrony43009, awesome person! Put my story on the Looking for Editor's group, and he came to my rescue. He has also agreed to be the editor for the rest of this story! CluelessFilly also came to my aid and has agreed to be an editor on this story. Now if that ain't 20% cooler, then I don't know what is! Both of these people are simply amazing!

Chapters (2)
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Comments ( 46 )

Not sure if want. Is this SoarinDash?

Great so far! Haven't seen something that ruins it yet! I love the drunk parts, it is almost like it is happening right in front of me. Keep it up!

Nice.... I up vote

In a way, most stories have a way to mach this bands music: Linkin Park

SoarFire. I suppose that's not that surprising actually. Actually though, I don't recall ever seeing RD even come close to falling for Soarin, she just wants into the wonderbolts like the ultimate fan naturally would.
My question is... WHY IS TWILIGHT A MAJOR CHARACTER?

Either this fic is so full of relationflips or Twi is a character that really helps the plot along. This is a most intriguing fic.

708313
Is it? I don't know :trollestia: But of course you want :scootangel:

708376>>708570
Thank you very much! It makes me feel happy hearing someone say that, especially this is my first story ever! :twilightsmile: Also, the song does strangely fit :rainbowhuh:

708488
Thanks :twilightblush:

708583
:yay: Someone called my fic intriguing...hopefully in a good way? Anyways, we''ll find out how everything connects together... maybe :raritywink: You'll just have to wait and see

708641 I will wait for that then shall I? Yes it is the good intrigued (I personally know of no other version) and my patience is enough.

708641
I do appreciate your humor, but seriously is it? That's the ultimate breaking point for me, because if it does have that pairing I'll have to skip over it because I hate that pairing with every single atom of my being. :twilightangry2:
It looks like a fun story aside from that bit of doubt I have though.

Yay drunk Wonderbolts, always a good thing. I don't see in any way how this can go wrong! :pinkiecrazy:

I await the next chapter with a mix of curiosity and excitement.

Well written, you get a like, a follow, and a spikestache. :moustache:

708662
Well it could be like you're intrigued by... it was intriguing that... you... My answer to you is there is a good type of intriguing and then there is :flutterrage: your face type of intriguing... Don't judge me, I'm not a dictionary :fluttershyouch:

708664
Well... without giving away too much, I'll just say that like real life things are more complicated than they appear. I'll also just throw in the fact that I may not be the biggest SoarDash fan either, but I still enjoy it... Hopefully that somewhat clears any doubts... :fluttershyouch: Please don't hate me

708787
:pinkiegasp: Curiosity and excitement?! That means I both excite and curiosize you; which is like pretty exciting to me, because its curious that I can elicit such feelings from people and ponies :pinkiehappy:
P.S. Drunk pony is best pony

708909
Why thank you good sir! I gratefully accept your gifts, and in return offer you a spikestache as well :moustache: Imported directly from Ponyville herself, the Equestrian Empire's finest colony I must add! Celestia save... well herself I guess :trollestia:

709505
I don't hate you, i hate the pairing. And you've suitably piqued my interest.

I'm just going to say it right now, this is TwiSoar (SoarLight?:unsuresweetie:) Isn't it? If it is, great. If it isn't, great. Don't even tell me, I'm just making my guess so I can say "I told you so" later.

You have my interest, can't wait to see how complicated this love might become and who ends up with who.

708641 Well you are welcome! (Aside from most critics on this site, there are always the ones who enjoy the story rather than criticize it.)

heh, I've really been into the whole music and matching thing lately, but haven't put it to the test. (The song I gave you was really just an example). As for the story, I don't mind certain pairings. More of a TwiDash, RariShy, SoarFire, such and such kind of person. Still can't wait for next chapter. :twilightsmile:

Jeez, I ask for a little mention and you go and do that! I'm not complaining, but wow! Still, can't wait for the next chapter!

You mean "Trollestia save... well herself i guess". I fixed that for you, :moustache:

hrmmm, interesting. Will follow because drunk ponies :rainbowwild:

Interesting story so far. I have a feeling that it is going to be a Soar-twi, which would be awesome. But even if it isn't Soarin' is best pony and this story is going to be so awesome. :rainbowkiss:

708641 708313 Ummm... The first two paragraphs shows that it's a SoarinSpitfire...

First Paragraph: And flying nearby was the mare of his dreams.

Second Paragraph: The golden-colored pegasus seemed to be set ablaze with her orange and yellow streaked hair.

Although I suppose it could be that at first he loves Spitfire, but then realizes that he likes Rainbow more, thus making is a SoarinDash.

773007
I haven't read the story. I don't read SoarinDash. EVER.

My reading list is kind of big anyway.

773123
Damn, you've really got your knickers in a twist over some fictional characters being shipped together!

Is this story dead?

1146273

No :derpytongue2: But the world seems to be working against me this past couple of months... I've had writer's block, but only with chapter 2. I'm doing too much world building I guess :fluttershysad: Then my friend downloads this LoL thing called Yaric and my computer crashes and burns, so now I don't even have a laptop for college this semester let alone writing (I'm using my sister's computer to check on things)... To top that off I've slowly been growing more depressed, lacking the motivation to do anything... :fluttercry:

However, this story isn't dead! I still have a back-up of all my pony stuff, including the story, on a thumb-drive and I have an entire notebook full of shiz.

1147200

Sorry to hear that. Best of luck, can't wait for the next chapter.

1147200 Oh god, don't mention world building. I have more words in random stuff, DISTANT future plot and world building than I do in the story itself, forget the fact that the author of the story mine is a crossover of is constantly bouncing ideas off me and vice versa. Honestly we're starting to have a hard time figuring out who's idea's are who's.

Hmmm I smell a Spitfire x Soarin'. :rainbowderp:

I love your writing, and everything is placed nicely.

Sadly, I am a huge SoarinDash and not so much SoarinFire. (Or whatever it's called). Not sure if want.... :trixieshiftleft:

1906456

All I'm going to say is that I'm kinda happy that everyone has been assuming SoarFire. :scootangel:

1906625 Mhhmmm okay. I'll stick around. xD

If It's a SoarinDash fic, then I'll be reading the heck out of it. I probably just won't be as intrigued if it's SoarFire. But I'll give it a go. :raritywink:

OH, so people are just assuming? :trixieshiftright: Hhhmm then the tables may turn.

This is going to get REALLY awkward soon unless I miss my guess...

Let me be as Blunt as Rainbow Dash for a second.

95% of what your writing is a horrible cheesy high school love drama that comes a dime a dozen and never is interesting to read. Spitfire seems way out of character and you give us no thought line behind her at all.

Now that the first is out of the way, let me get to the second.

Despite your absolutely horrid storyline and characterazation when dealing with said storyline... theres something else that's managed to keep me. (4 other % of your writing. The last 1 % is hopes for a Dash/Soarin fic)

That something is some of Soarin's thought lines that pegs how I've always imagined him. Its incredible how there a few sentances you have that let us really know how you're taking Soarin, what his thoughts and desires are, his worries. I'm not sure if you even notice it, but it's quite spectacular when you pull it off.

So once you pull out of the cheese (if you ever do) of the plot line, you really have some potential. I think I'll keep my eye on you.

1941736

It will get super awkward, because that's how love goes :raritywink:

1943374

This is only chapter two and I know that I should be getting everything out within the first few pages, but I should put this out there that one of my favorite things to do is mislead people.

I actually appreciate the criticism because this is my very first fan-fic, so its nice to hear someone telling me that my story is ungodly cheesy :twilightblush: As far as Spitfire goes, its been hard for me trying to find a place to insert her POV into the story until chapter 3, which I just need to edit now. I'll try to take your advice and hopefully make the story less cheesy as time progresses :pinkiehappy:

1943512
Wow, has it really been over thirty weeks since the last chapter?

I didn't really like this one. As 1943374 said, its pretty damn cheesy, but what really got me was how... disjointed the final conversation between Spitfire and Soarin was. Everything felt so forced, and a lot of their actions didn't seem to make sense.

No offence, but I think this was probably something I picked up on a whim when I had a sudden craving for Soarin' x Dash, and I don't think I'll be taking this any further.

Good luck, though.

1946177

Yeah its been thirty weeks or so :fluttershyouch: Trying not to fail school kinda trumps fan-fics

I totally understand how that goes, wanting to find a quick story to read and being let down. :twilightsheepish: I'm taking this story as a learning experience as my very first fic, and successful or not its a step towards progress. :pinkiehappy:

Go Soarin Ask her out :pinkiehappy::heart::heart:

uh oh this happiness isnt gonna last :pinkiegasp::rainbowderp:

1946587

successful or not its a step towards progress.

Good attitude. That's my current view on my own story.

I'm hoping dash comes in here soon.

“You look… absolutely stunning!” the stallion stammered, trying to grasp the words necessary to fit the beauty in front of him.

Clearly there were no words to grasp because WE DIDN'T GET ANY DESCRIPTION ON WHICH MADE HER SO BEAUTIFUL.:ajbemused:
Was she wearing something? Did she have her mane done differently? Did she paint herself as Rainbow Dash?:rainbowwild:

Aside from the cheese so far, I'm glad that SOMEONE jumped on the fact that there could be drama between Soarin, Spitfire, and RD. I mean, come on, it's practically screaming at any creative person saying: "There is possible drama here between these three, please write about me...:fluttershysad:"

Oh yeah, and I encourage you to keep writing this...pwease?:fluttercry:

1970525

It's hard for me not to be a cheesball :twilightsmile: Just ask my girlfriend, I always embarrass her with my gooey over-the-top romanticizing.

There actually was a huge description that accompanied Soarin's awe, but I scrapped it because (at least to me) it doesn't make sense in context with chapter 3. It was extremely difficult for me to scrap it too. :fluttercry:

I'm almost done editing chapter 3 myself, so hopefully by next week chapter 3 should be up.

1974738

I don't know what it is :raritywink: Maybe its SoarFire, maybe its SoarDash; I might even go M. Night on this story and make it a crackship between other Wonderbolts.

1977801
Your uncertainty gives me uncertainty. Stop it. :derpytongue2:
I would love to have a full-fledged SoarFire fic from you but I'm just biased. (hey, SoarFire is an extremely underrated ship, for no apparent reason)

In any case, it's your story, do what you want. I won't press.

Incredible work. Can't wait for the next chapter. SO BRING ONE OUT!

2106797

I'm sorry! :raritycry: I'm actually the worst person when it comes to deadlines and trying to be punctual. It also doesn't help that this semester sucks right now :ajbemused:

I ask when will the next chapter?

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