The Cutie Mark Crusaders have a plan! They're going to stage a play and become huge stars in Manehatten! Well, if they can get their lines right. To practice for their big musical, they have to borrow a few things from Sweetie Belle's sister, Rarity, to get everything just right. When a prank during rehearsal inadvertently reveals a disturbing secret, will the three friends be able to find out who's lying before a sinister fate can befall them? Or will they be silenced before they can discover the truth?
Chapters (1)
Well, it was interesting, but not there. Seems to me that all gore fanfics involving one of the mane6 are all OoC-ish. There is never, ever a solid reason for one of them to turn into a cold-blooded killer. But even so, I kept on reading, thinking about the gore that was coming. Sadly, the gory parts also disappointed me; they weren't vivid enough for me...
And the ending with Sapphire Shores just... derailed it completely.
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I thought that familial jealousy was a decent motivation, but each to their own. If that doesn't seem like a very compelling reason to want to get rid of her sister, you might consider the fact she was trying to cover up various other murders she had committed for her art. Granted the artist that's willing to go to any lengths for her craft, even murder, is something of a cliche', but I think that works with Rarity's character. She has a bipolar quality that I think could really lend itself to making poor decisions if she were put in a desperate enough situation.
Sorry if the gore wasn't colorful enough for you, but I don't tend to dwell on the details in most of my grimdark. If you over analyze violence it just becomes funny and loses a lot of it's impact. I probably could have drawn out the dismemberment of the CMC a bit, but at the time I wrote this (when Sisterhoove Social first aired) I was more interested in exploring the anger and rage that Rarity had kept in check for the length of that episode.
And if you don't get the joke ending with Sapphire Shores, we don't share a sense of humor. That's okay though, each to their own.
695691 No no. When I said that Rarity turned into a cold-blooded killer, I meant that we needed a more... realistic (if you really take the show into consideration) reason for her to snap and commit those various murders that she tried to cover up and ended up in this fanfic. But I do agree that, if somepony in the show were to snap, it would be Rarity. Her personality by far is the 'deepest' of all the mane6's. And you're also right when you say that dwelling only on the gore tends to become funny and not... eerie/scary. But this fanfic would benefit a bit with a little more blood (IMO).
I think that you did a good job in explaining Rarity's anger (although that wasn't enough to convince me, but anywho), I think this still has a lot of potential. If you ever consider re-writing/revising this story, please let me know. I'd love to read it.
And yeah... I didn't get the joke at the ending.
Mind spoiling it for me?
Cant you keep a mental patient locked up for good :flutters
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It was actually a bit of a trifecta. First you might have figured out the dress that Sapphire is modeling is the little number Pinkie Pie whipped up in Cupcakes. (I thought it would be interesting in any further expansion of the story to move Rarity towards making dresses out of her victims rather than just using her victims to make dresses.) Second, it was a rib on Lady Gaga's whole 'meat dress'. (Making fun of eccentric celebrities is always fun) I thought it would be especially amusing with Sapphire as she had previously put in a rather large order of dresses with Rarity that had caused an entire episodes worth of trouble for her. The third part of the joke is that it's a blatant nod to the Dethkolk episode "Dethfashion". I guess it was a bit esoteric though, come to that.
As to the story itself, at the time I first wrote it, it was important to me to make sure any damage done was either reversible or minimal enough that a sequel could be done involving the same characters. Since then I've moved on to other projects, so I guess I can see where that may have come off as not quite as satisfying as it could have been. Maybe I will get around to writing that follow up eventually though...ya never know.
Well I think this was a wonderful gore-fic dear sir.
Woof, super creepy Rarity. XD Very well done! ^^
Fun and amusing story, though not great one. I'm afraid BronyWriter did a better job in writing a story about Rarity being a secret serial killer. Called "The Secret Life of Rarity."
Cute, kinda nice play on the world. Like
This stories Rarity is a demon with not a drop of love in her heart.
May she be stopped if she ever escapes.
Wait a second sapphire shores is here
Sweetie Belle!