29. Golden Opportunity
My eyes popped open and I gasped. “We’ve got to get to class! I mean, save the princess!”
To my left there was a soft, tittering laugh.
A quick glance around found that the oozing haze was gone and sunlight was pouring in from the windows. I was on a big, plush, gold pillow with a blanket wrapped around me. My head ached a bit but, other than that, I felt fine.
The source of the laugh had been Princess Celestia. The great alicorn was sitting at her desk with a quill levitated. “Good morning. How do you feel?” she asked cheerfully.
“Good morning? I feel worn out… Shouldn’t we be out saving Equestria?”
She shook her head and waved a hoof. “Oh, no that has been take care of. Two days ago, actually. You used quite a lot of energy, little pony. You’ve been snoozing soundly. Who is Diddle, by the way?”
Diddle? Oh no! Had I talked in my sleep in front of the princess? Change the subject! “Wait! Taken care of? A big evil alicorn or something was taken care of in just two days?”
“Technically, no. She was technically taken care of the same night you rescued me. So, actually, it has been a pretty good week so far.”
“Who took care of her?” I squealed.
Princess Celestia smiled. “Twilight Sparkle.”
“Twilight Sparkle! Are you kidding me?” That anti-social, know-it-all, bookworm of a pony took care of an evil alicorn?
The alicorn’s head tilted and then it dawned on her. “Oh, that is right! You and Twilight don’t get along, do you? I vaguely remember that.”
I sputtered, “Get along? She is Miss Prissy Perfect and when I’d get in trouble, Apple Polish would say ‘Why can’t you be more like Twilight Sparkle?’”
With a soft laugh, the princess stood up and trotted over to me. Using her magic, she flew a glass of water over as well. “Now, now Sunny, you did a good job, too. Drink this.”
Using my levitation spell, I reached out for the glass but it just sputtered. Instead, I took it in my hooves and drank it all down. “So… I’ve just been sleeping in your… office?”
“Yes, the Royal Guards wanted to take you to their hospital, but I convinced General Winddancer that I could handle your care. It only seemed appropriate considering your contribution to my freedom.”
Pride filled me at that. Twilight Sparkle wasn’t sleeping in Princess Celestia’s office! “Thank you, Princess, that is awfully kind. I’m sure I’ll be fine, though.” I stood up. My legs were a bit sore and crampy but, in general, everything seemed to be okay.
“You are a very strong and determined pony, Sunny. I truly admire that about you. Why not take it easy, however? I’m told you’ve been given two weeks of medical leave to recover. For today, we could even have lunch together.”
Lunch with the princess? That would be neat! It sounded so official. Although, then I’d have to make small talk. What do I talk to her about? Colts? Hmm… did she like colts or fillies? Both? Neither? Did the princess have a lover? Nah!
“Lover—ly sounds nice. I mean lunch! Sorry, my head is fuzzy still. I would like to get lunch with you. That would be lovely.”
“Very good! Let me just put a final signature on this paperwork and we’ll go.”
“Great!” I’d never been in the princess’s office before. It wasn’t at all what I imagined. In my head, it would be huge and opulent with pillars everywhere. Perhaps gold? I don’t know! She was the only alicorn.
Her office was far humbler. It wasn’t that big, for one. I mean, it was large for an office, but just enough to have a desk, a small seating area, and a few chairs. Then there were the walls. They were all bookshelves and scroll cases. There were no giant portraits or fancy art.
Even the furniture was pretty utilitarian. It was nice wood, but nothing like the marble altar I expected.
All in all, I guess it suited a pony like Princess Celestia. She wasn’t really the type to throw around wealth for no reason. In my opinion, anyway. It wasn’t like I really knew her.
As I explored the office, the door nearest me opened and a large, dark blue pony trotted through. No! Oh, no! Twilight, you were supposed to finish the job!
The dark pony was, in fact, an alicorn! A small alicorn, but still bigger than me, and an alicorn! Her flank was black and bore a crescent moon cutie mark. I squealed, “Ah! Nightmare Moon! Run, Princess!”
I tried to light my horn up but nothing happened, so I did the only reasonable thing left: I pounced. Of course, my body wasn’t really in top notch condition, either, so I bumped into the alicorn and started slapping at her with my forehooves.
“Cripes! What is this nonsense?” she boomed before slapping back with her forehooves.
We went on like that for a few moments until it became clear that Princess Celestia was laughing hysterically behind me. Slowly, I stopped. Of course, when I did so, I caught a hoof lightly on the snout.
Nightmare Moon’s eyes narrowed. “Only a single moon hath passed and thou art already resorting to foalish pranks?”
Princess Celestia inhaled sharply, trying to catch her breath. All she could do was shake her head no.
I wrapped my forelegs around one of Nightmare Moon’s… just in case. I couldn’t let her get to the princess.
Nightmare Moon lifted that leg with ease and I slowly slid down it and landed on my rump. “Unhoof us, small pony!”
Princess Celestia came around her desk, still giggling, and said, “Now, Luna, where are your manners? This is a former student of mine, Sunny Day. She is mistakenly trying to protect me.”
“Protect thee? Protect thee from what?”
“Nightmare Moon?” I asked curiously.
“Nightmare Moon hath been banished! She is a shame upon us, but is no more. Mine sister needeth not protection from us. She hath promised us lunch and we have come to collect.”
Princess Celestia’s ears wiggled. “That is true. Although Sunny will be joining us since she is awake. Sunny, I’d like to introduce you to my little sister, Luna. She’s back from moon camp, isn’t that wonderful?”
“Yes?” How should I know! Wasn’t she Nightmare Moon, like, a day ago?
“Yes!” Princess Celestia cheered. “Come, girls, let’s go have lunch.” She then trotted out of the office like everything was perfectly normal.
Nightmare Moon… er, Luna stuck her nose up in the air and followed after. Little sister? She was smaller. Barely bigger than some of the larger stallions. Kind of cute, too. Nice rump. I wonder if she’s into fillies? Nah.
I’d have to keep an eye on her. Princess Celestia was too forgiving. I trotted along behind. Lunch sounded good, though. I was starving. It is tough to eat when you’re unconscious.
☼
Following a rather heavy and awkward lunch, Princess Celestia and I had returned to her office. Where Luna had gone, I have no idea. I guess her own room in the palace? Did she have a room? Did Twilight Sparkle have a room? If she did, I wanted a room, too.
“Have a seat, Sunny,” the princess said offering me a chair across from her.
I did so and swished my tail. I knew this personal attention wasn’t going to last forever but I aimed to enjoy it while it did! “So… what’s next?”
“That is certainly the question, isn’t it?”
“I think so. That’s why I asked.”
Princess Celestia cracked a smile. “Indeed. Well, tell me something. What do you want, Sunny?”
Lots of things! “Can you be more specific?”
“How can I show my appreciation for what you did?”
That was far more direct. I felt heat in my cheeks and I quickly waved a hoof. “Nothing at all! I was doing my job, Princess. It is the job I’m already paid to do. Royal guards don’t get special perks for doing what they’re supposed to do.”
She sat her chin on her hoof. “Is that so?”
“Yes, Princess. We don’t do our work for a reward. We do it because it is the right thing to do and it matters.”
“Ah, yes. That was always a concern for you. Doing something that made a difference. Correct?”
Eagerly, I nodded. “Yes, ma’am!”
“And what you do now? Does that make a difference?”
“No… I mean, yes! Well… kind of!”
Her head tilted. “Which is it?”
“Before I got here, I worked in the G9, which is really just an awful job that is all about being pretty and telling ponies what they want to hear. You don’t actually go out and help anypony. You just make them less angry.
“I got so fed up with it I started working hard to get out of it. Now, in theory, if I go back, I’ll at least get a patrol unit, but it will probably be an awful one because I kind of ticked off the commander. It still might work out really well, though. It is certainly better than the G9!”
“I see… ponies have really complicated careers. Do you really want to go back to this potentially awful patrol unit?”
Did I? Being in Canterlot had really felt good. Baltimare wasn’t home. It was lonely and I still wasn’t sure if the commander was really going to take care of me. “Not really… but I will! I will and I’ll make it work!”
Princess Celestia nodded. “I have no doubt of that. What is your ultimate goal, though?”
“Ultimate goal? I guess to do something that matters.”
She grinned. “I think you can check that box, Sunny. What is your next goal? For your career?”
Check the box ’I’d just… saved the… er an alicorn’. Okay so most ponies couldn’t say that. Goal… new goal… “To move back to Canterlot and stay here but also be a royal guard! With a real command.”
“Alright, so you want a real command and you want it in Canterlot?”
“Yes, ma’am. That is now my goal.”
“Good. It is great to have goals to aim for.” The princess looked towards the door and called, “Colonel, could you come in here please?”
Colonel?
The door opened and the broad, white-coated unicorn strode in with all of his hotness. He was covered with his custom gold armor, but I bet he was all kinds of muscles under there. “Yes, Princess?”
“Lieutenant Day here has a goal for her career. She wants a command in Canterlot. Something that allows her to help ponies. Nothing administrative. Can you help her achieve that goal?”
Wait! No, I’d just answered the question! That isn’t what I’d meant. My jaw went slack.
“Yes, ma’am, I can do that. We do want our best and our brightest here. In fact, I think there is a palace guard section with a lieutenant that is ready to be promoted. I’ve been holding off because I wanted to make certain I had a good replacement lined up. I’ll go ahead and get the paperwork started.”
Princess Celestia bobbed her head in a nod. “Thank you, Colonel Armor. And thank you, Sunny Day, for believing in me. I look forwards to seeing you around the palace more. I miss our little chats. Especially with your seeming lack of filter.”
She warmly waved a hoof and then added, “You two have fun working together.”
“I—buh… but!”
“Come along, Lieutenant, we’ll have a mountain of paperwork to do. Especially since I’m still not even sure where you came from or who your commander is,” Colonel Armor said as he made his way to the door.
I hopped out of the chair and followed. Halfway through the door, I stopped and looked back at the princess. She smiled and winked at me.
“Thank you… thank you so much!” I called and then trotted off after the colonel.
I was going to be a palace guard! Was I? Was I really? Yes! She wouldn’t lie! A palace guard! I tried to be professional but I couldn’t. I pranced my way down that hall right behind him, my booty jiggling all the way. Lieutenant Sunny Day, Canterlot Palace Guard!
He led me into an office and sat down behind his desk with a heavy sigh. The unicorn took his helmet off and set it on his desk. He looked… not happy? Tired? Oh no… was he now going to tell me that the princess doesn’t get to decide Guard things?
“Sit,” he said.
“If I’m going to get bad news I’d prefer to stand, sir.”
His ear flicked. “Bad news? Why would you think that?”
“You look… uh… mad? No… disgruntled? I don’t know. Not as excited as I feel!”
He snorted and shook his head. “I’ve had a rough couple of days, Lieutenant. You may have noticed that we lost our princess. The Royal Guard lost the princess! Do you know that no Captain of the Canterlot Guard has ever done that?”
“But we found her!”
“You found her. A lieutenant from… where did you say, again?”
“Baltimare. We’re all one team, though, so me finding her is like you finding her.”
He nodded. “True. Again, though, I shouldn’t have lost her. So please, sit so we can talk about your transfer.”
My rump found the chair super fast and I replied, “Yes, sir!”
“So you’re a lieutenant from the Baltimare City Guard. What unit are you with?” The unicorn stallion captured a quill in his magic and settled it over a scroll while he met my gaze with his own.
“Technically I’m between units, sir. I was in the G9 but I kicked over some trash can, caught the commander’s attention, and he promised me the chance to work in a horrible patrol unit if I finished captain’s school… which I did! Then I went on leave and then the city went crazy and now I’m here.”
Colonel Armor blinked and held up a hoof. “Wait. You’re between units and you kicked a trash bin?”
“My status is somewhat in question. My direct commander was delaying me going to captain’s school because she thought I was better in G9. It upset me because I worked hard to be a patrol officer. So I was… you know… venting, and the city commander saw it and wanted to find out why. He’s the one that sent me to school. I haven’t been back yet to know if I have a job… sir.”
He slowly settled the quill down. “O… kay. This isn’t going to change anything but be honest with me. Other than saving Princess Celestia, have you done anything noteworthy with your career yet?”
I nibbled on my lip. “Well… actually… n—” Then I saw it. He had a calendar on his wall. “Yes!” My hoof stabbed at it. “Check out Thunder Moon.”
“Huh?” Colonel Armor turned to look in confusion. His nose wrinkled. “My marefriend got me that as a joke.” His magic pulled it off the wall and he flipped it to the Thunder Moon. His eyes went wide and kept flicking between it and me. “Seriously?”
“Yup! That is why I wanted a transfer.”
He sheepishly tossed the calendar aside. “Fair enough! Nice socks, by the way… I mean, let’s get your paperwork started. So… between commands.” The quill lifted up and started scribbling on the scroll. He worked for about two minutes before the scroll itself was encircled by magic.
Colonel Armor crumbled it up and dropped it into the trash can by his desk. “You know what, I have no idea how to do this so I’m just going to send a letter to the Baltimare City Guard saying I’ve reassigned you for a critical mission. Are they going to be upset with that?”
“I doubt they’re going to care at all. Vice Colonel Wonder might, but she made me do a calendar. She’s on her own!”
“I don’t think there is a regulation for that, but on principle I’m just going to nod and say okay. Welcome to the Palace Guard! You’ll be part of second company. The opening is going to be commanding Delta section. They’re responsible for the bailey and the gift shop.”
Gift shop? “There’s a gift shop?”
He sighed and nodded. “There is, in fact, a gift shop and you will, in fact, have to ensure its security. For some reason it has a door that connects into the palace and the fire marshal assures me that it is required.
“Look, ponies like to take tours and buy gifts from said tours. The money from that goes to scholarships for gifted unicorns so they can attend Princess Celestia’s School.”
“Wait… are you saying my education was paid for by ponies buying trinkets with Princess Celestia’s face on them?”
“Yes. That is exactly what I’m saying.”
My mind was blown by that fact. Well… it sure beat being in a calendar. Plus, I got to guard a wall! That was cool. I think? Eh, either way I was moving home. I’d figure out the other part later. Oh I couldn’t wait to tell Dolly! She’d be ecstatic. “Well, sir, then sign me up! I’ll be your best gift shop security guard to date.”
He nodded. “I’m glad to have you, Sunny. Well… actually, I think I am. You’re pretty different from every other lieutenant I’ve met. Still, you saved the princess, so I owe you one. Welcome aboard.”
“Thank you, sir!”
This chapter delighted me :D
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Careful now, Sunny Day. I tolerate a lot of your quirks, yes, but disrespecting the esteemed Lady of the Night, even if by thought, is an offence in my eyes that shall always meet retribution...
... seriously, this socks thing is getting ridiculous.
I really liked this chapter! A nice dose of humor to offset the tears of trials
Yay for Sunny!!! You'll be the best Soda jerk/Pretty face/Calendar Filly/Giftshop Guard in ALL of
EquestriaCanerlotthe castle!You're a golden pony, Sunny
Wow Celestia.
Wow. This put a smile on my face. Good for Sunny! I wonder if the Colonel is going to care?
And all's well that ends well.
Wait, what am I saying? This is Sunny Day! If anyone can figure out how to screw this up for our amusement, it's her.
More importantly, we know where this is eventually going to go. Now who's teacher's pet, Lieutenant?
Way to go Sunny, you're on your way to a bright future now go guard that wall. and I so want to see that calender for some reason.
Victory over the evil alicorn! Sound the trumpets! Break out the moonpies!
Hah!
Twilight may not be sleeping in Celestia's office, but probably on account of not being unconscious for two days.
Hey, you'll never know unless you bluntly ask, preferably during this upcoming lunch so we can all see the reaction.
It's especially funny since chronologically speaking this is probably Luna's very first appearance in all of the Q&B stories.
Moon camp?
You'll/we'll never know unless you ask!
Oh yeah, time for that surprise career trajectory change.
Only Cadance gets to know for certain. Also, I want to see how Sunny reacts once she finds out whose brother this is.
Gotta find your fun where you can.
Bwhahahahaha!
Bailey and gift shop duty? Hey, getting closer.
I get the impression that the obvious future prank would be impossible to pull over on Sunny, given her "lack of filter." Though it might make for a fun reverse-prank to suggest Luna for.
Luna: Grinning suggestively. "Lieutenant Day, I hear you have an eye for my royal posterior. Perhaps you would like a closer look...?"
Sunny: "You bet! If it weren't for regulations, I'd be all over it like a... um... Like a horney pony all over a hot pony!" Wink!
Luna:
"SISTER!"
It's sad (to me) to think that Sunny's so far off-base with her musings, and that the alicorns apparently have nothing to do with anything resembling romantic intimacy.
The Luna/Sunny slap fight was hysterical.
And I absolutely LOVED Shiny attempting to deal with Sunny. He seemed like he wasn't entirely sure what to do with a pony like her. Not your normal stick up the plot Lt now, is she? 
Though... she might enjoy that stick, so who knows? 
ANYWAY, the idea of Sunny's education being paid for by ponies buying trinkets with Sunbutt's face is also hysterical. 
This chapter was absolutely delightful like you wouldn't believe.
7286793 I think Anzel should commission the calendar.
Ahem. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ahem.
Great chapter as always, looking forward to the next one.
7286976 IIRC from the Silent Knight series Celestia believes that there is something innate to alicorns that causes ordinary ponies to become overly worshipful or fanatical to them if they get too close emotionally. Therefore no matter how much she likes a pony she has to remain a certain level of professional distance for the sake of their sanity. Luna doesn't agree and feels Celestia is extrapolating too much from a few incidents but is following her lead for now. Obviously that could lead to trouble someday if Luna finds a pony she's interested in romantically. Or perhaps if Luna feels that Celestia is unfairly denying herself a potential friendship or romance out of paranoia.
Ohmygosh Anzel! I just read the most atrociously horrible story I have yet seen on this site.
A chapter from you is a breath of fresh air! Thank you for your excellent timing, sir!
* flaps off to read it *
Edit: and you made me laugh again. I needed that.
*glare* Even if it was at Luna's expense.
She should have said that to the Colonel. it would have been funny
Let's all be fair. If the Princess really did just up and disappear than there would be riots.
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Out of morbid curiosity; what story was that?
7288149 Sharing that information may violate the Geneighva Convention. Sorry.
7286335 Im sure that there can be some recompense from the poor mare. she was pretty groggy and misinformed at the time, and possibly a prank by tia. Its amusing either way.
I have to say this was an amusing chapter, and its interesting to see that sunny is that dedicated to tia. A good start on her career by impressing the supreme commander of the military your in lol. And we get to see a young shining armor as well. I cant wait to see how this all plays out. and i hope this means more trolling from Dolly in the future.
Laughing so hard, through the entire chapter. Well done!
7286793
7287131
I mean... Sunny's miss July. And it is July right now... 'M just sayin'... Might be the right time to do it.
7306323 I don't know about a calendar but I do want to do a "young Sunny" in going out gear. That might happen!
7288647 That makes me smile :D I was really pleased with some of the silliness in this one. Today's chapter might make you laugh more!
7288346 Amusing was the goal. The idea of a slap fight just made me laugh. :D
7288065 Assuming it was public knowledge and the guard wasn't ahead of the situation.
7288046 Guarding a wall is serious business! Look at "A Few Good Men."
7287924 I'm glad I could bring you up! This was a thrilling chapter to write.
7287756 Very interesting thoughts here!
7287344 Yay! Wait until you read today's chapter ;D
7287049 When I wrote it I was stoked. Like super stoked! I just loved the mental image. And yes, Sunny is not like most ponies so dealing with her is fun!
7286976 Pranking Sunny is dangerous! She might just go along with it.
7286905
It pretty much is actually! I don't think I'd write anything from the day or so before. This is Luna right back from...
Come on, troll pony gotta troll.
I need to scribble a note about that.
7286793 She is indeed!
7286784 Sunny doesn't screw things up! She makes them more fun ^_^
7286780 Huzzah! I'm glad you it did :D
7286609 You know you liked it!
7286377 The goldenest pony there is!
7286349 She is! She really is.
7286346 It is a really good balance for sure ;)
7286335 Haha, depends on how you mean by disrespect!
7306401 yeah, I saw the movie.
7306401 Yes, yes it did.
Thank you!
Finally, sunny is moving on up in her career.
This amused me to no end. I'm still giggling.