• Member Since 23rd Jun, 2012
  • offline last seen Yesterday

The Good Dark Lord


T

One unlucky young woman from Earth finds herself in one of those bizarre alternate universes of MLP FIM where humans are villainous predators on par with wolves and velociraptors.

Her superior intelligence to the native humans and average skill in wrestling and martial arts convinces everypony that she's a super dangerous badass that wants to eat them for breakfast, when really she's just a harmless joker that means well. The language barrier does not help her case.

Our heroine is well aware of just how stupid her situation is, but she deals with it because adapting to the stupid is one of humanity's finest traits.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 53 )

As long as she has her own faults, can get into trouble ,and make mistakes, she won't turn out to be a Mary Sue.

Well It looks like I am the first to comment. This was an enjoyable read, the dialog is perfect I know who is talking and to whom they might be talking to. I look forward in reading the next chapter:twilightsmile:

"Gee what a nice day for a walk in the woods. I sure hope nothing unexpected happens."

THAT is the most cliche line ever created. I can't stop laughing :rainbowlaugh:

There were probably all sorts of dangerous animals around here. Wolves, bears, rednecks, you name it.

:rainbowlaugh:

I panicked, wrapped my arms around her waist, and suplexed her anime style.

Good god, that made me laugh. I was seriously not expecting the "martial art" to be wrestling. That's just hilarious.

But as the story went on I realized that it was just a romantic clopfic about a self insert with a pet fetish.

You know, when you put it that way... It's kinda not wrong. I sort of want to disagree because that story is a good read in the parts of it that aren't a clopfic, but I can't really say it's not true, either.

Just be careful about how genre savvy you make this whole thing. I think you might be overdoing it a little. It's a lot like a self-parody in tone, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but might also not be what you were actually aiming for. Still, I liked it. I'll be following this.

I like this, and agree that humans would, by pony standards, be villians. Plus, the humans aren't stupid. I'll be watching.

It's a crackfic but it's not about sex or angst so I'll follow.

realized that it was just a romantic clopfic about a self insert with a pet fetish. Most of the spin offs were also about self inserts who showed off how awesome and righteous they were and how wrong and cruel the ponies were. What a fucking waste. I think I've seen some other stories with similar premises, but they never delivered.

So annoying for me too. Started off under the promise of a great story, then just turned into a creepy clopfic.

Hey, I don't read clopfic, but I have nothing against a writer making a pony/pony clopfic. Human/pony clopfics are a whole level of fucked up though.

6951253
Eh, admittedly, crackfics are the worst kind of fics next to self-insert romance, harems, and m-pregs ( andany combination of those will solidify your spot in hell), but this hasn't quite reached crack yet. Probably will though.
Still, I to generally despise the human and you-verse and am embarrassed by it's popularity, so I'll probably read this because I thought the originals were wasted potential as well.
Hope it updates soon.

6951316 Human and griffon however... rowwwrr!

*Gilda feels a sinister chill and looks out her window, to find Alondro staring at her, fogging up the pane...* :pinkiecrazy:

*seconds later, Rainbow Dash is jolted awake on her cloud...*

images.wikia.com/mlp/images/archive/a/a6/20130121031016!Rainbow_Dash_and_Gilda_Shock_S1E5.png

Applejack and Apple Bloom were walking through the Everfree Forest.

Oodelally, oodelally, golly what a day! :trollestia:

6951446 Are you stalking me as I read through the featured box, haha?

I find the idea of wild antagonistic humans much more interesting than tame dumb humans.

Well, given how stupid, weak, and oblivious these humans are... plus the fact they eat ponies... I'm surprised Celestia hasn't flash-fried the lot of them already.

:trollestia:

6951462 The same argument could be made for timber wolves, cragadiles, cockatrices and other such "pony eating monsters".

Besides, Celestia doesn't have the ovaries.

6951453 Yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss... :pinkiecrazy:

Well... ok, no. But I shall certainly take advantage of the coincidence to unnerve you! :trollestia:

6951473 The giant Timberwolf takes offense! "I haven't even eaten any ponies since I got written into this damned cartoon! Not for lack of trying, mind you. (lol, Vegeta line from DBZ: Abridged) :trollestia:

Anyway, those monsters are neato! Humans are just icky. And lame. And gross. And creepy. And weird! Like spiderses! Like "The Spiderses"!

... I like this. I think this might become what I had hoped 'your human and you would' be.

6951530
Spiders are awesome, you philistine. You take that back right now.

6952215 A 7 legged spider once killed my wife and framed me for the murder... :pinkiecrazy:

Well, hook, line and sinker I would say. The fact the the humans have an actual IQ above room temprature coupled with Barbara┬┤s character so far gives me high hopes for this story. Keep that going kay?:pinkiehappy:

Seriously. I mean it.:pinkiecrazy:

6952839 ...mmmmmmmH ?yrots eht fo emoctuo elbissop eht no gnirednop era uoy esuaceb s'ti ebyaM .taht gniod era uoy yhw dnatsrednu t'nod I
Why did I do that in reverse...:facehoof:

hi hi

Hopefully Fluttershy can translate, assuming Barbara can make it that far anyways.

6952980 Not enough IQ to put on some clothes apparently.

6951328

Well those other examples are content. Crackfic is not about content it's about story style. A crackfic disregards logic and reason in favor of plot and style. It has nothing to do with any of the actual content.

hmm, seems interesting. I think i'll stick around for now.

6955512 ?semloH kcoltihS ,noisserpmi taht uoy evag tahW ?yllaer ,hO

.KCOLREHS TIHS ON ,sdrow rehto nI

6959703 .:rainbowderp:..eno siht htiw gnorts si msacras ehT

6959842 ...nwo ym no noiculcnoc taht ot emoc reve evah dluoc I woh rednow I .nmad ,lleW

...rednow I ...eeG

I agree, the YHOY fad is the epitome of wasted potential. I look forward to seeing what happens here.

As for going Mary Sue, I'd say don't worry too much. The simplest rule for avoiding a Mary Sue is to just make sure everything makes sense. So long as everyone is still in character and her actions have consequences (which may or may not be good), then you probably don't have a Mary Sue.

I've kinda always wished humans were predatory like this...:rainbowderp:

Wow I had never read a story with a female OC the idea is just brilliant! This is actually a great fic and I think I'm going to enjoy it.

but she deals with it because adapting to the stupid is what humanity does best.

Yep, I have to say that's pretty damn spot-on.

Looking forward to the next chapter.

Comment posted by 111segasonic deleted Jun 6th, 2016

Gee what a nice day for a walk in the woods. I sure hope nothing unexpected happens.

For anyone who is interested in living though their own HiE situation think these magic words! You are practically begging for the trip.

Experiences may vary.

Wait, are these humans supposed to be mustache twirlers, or is this some sort of misanthropic story?

Ooh, it almost hurts to come across a promising story premise that is doomed to never be fulfilled after the first chapter. Is this story miscarriage or do those even make it through the editors?

Sooooooo when is the next chapter

this looks promising
only problem is there is only 1 chapter out of a planed minimum of 3 and hasn't updated in 10 months
so i'm gonna pass
if it updates any will someone let me know please
i wanna know where this goes

Looks interesting, but is more coming?

This is one of those stories you see, only one chapter published a year ago, you give a try...and you end up pleasantly surprised and wondering why the author never continued it. Then you check their other stories and have to press page down on your keyboard seven times to reach a story that has more than one chapter.

Maybe pick one and finish it? A lot of people won't even click on a story with only one chapter. Yet even so this has over 3000 views and an overwhelming majority upvote ratio.

*sighs* One year on, and only one chapter. The signs are all there. Somebody get me a time of death, this one's goin' down the drain.

Wowi
One incredible well thought beginning...
But you should definitively Look how to continue...
Perhaps Fluttershy...
Or can that human understand other animals?
Or Tries to comunicate by using gestures...

My Little Nazi: Genocide is Magic



Is this a good idea?

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