4 - Friend or Foe
I kept my cool. I think that's what made the difference. I didn't drift out for them. I kept myself rooted in my body as words appeared beside them. 'Food', 'Click', and 'Scuttle' beside the usual options. "We don't have to fight..." I saw 'Mercy' flash, but the beetles weren't impressed and rushed for me with jaws wide.
I rolled out of the way of the first and scrambled to my feet in time to jump aside of the second. The third's mandibles scraped along my arm, but my new armor was tough enough to turn it into a bruise instead of worse. Okay, that didn't work. Let's try... I pulled out my corn and ripped off a bit of it and tossed it out towards them. "Everyone likes crystal corn on the cob. It's tasty."
One of the beetles paused in its approach and veered off to the corn, starting to nibble away at it with happy-sounded click noises as 'Food' flashed beside it. The horses began to scream and run around in a blind panic, trying to get away from other beetles that threatened them, but I already had three to deal with at the moment. They'd have to wait! Why couldn't things pause mid-fight like they used to? At least the eating one gained an aura of golden yellow, hinting that it was ready to cease the conflict.
The two battle-ready beetles locked mandibles suddenly. Dark energy crackled between them with an ominous buzzing that had me taking a slow step back. The energy burst forth in a beam towards me and I screamed as I dived out of the way, skidding along the ground. The beam struck some poor horse's house and exploded violently. Think fast, think fast... Instead of standing up, I hopped to all fours and made a little scuttly dance. "See, I understand your ways..."
One of them tilted its head at me and made a few clicks in return. A yellow aura danced across its carapace. Despite two of them being ready to call it off, a loud clicking cry from the remaining one got the other two back in and they hopped onto one another before coming at me with all three mandles clicking dangerously.
I scuttled away from them in a bit of a panic as I tried my own clicks, Huffing between each set of clicks. How do you say 'let's be friends' in beetle?! I looked over my shoulder as they were catching up to me, and saw they were all glowing yellow. I did it? I musta! I hopped to my feet and thrust up a hand at them and they pulled up to a sudden halt. "Let's call it all off, alright? You don't need to hurt me, or these horses."
Their auras faded to a dull grey and they slid off of one another. A jingle came from my pocket, announcing the arrival of fresh funds. One of the beetles scuttled up to me. "What can we do? The darkness will get angry at us if we don't do what we're told."
Another beetle nodded quickly. "I don't want to be punished, again. It hurts!"
The third raised a leg into the air. "I just got my antenna straight! What can we do, human?"
It took a moment to realize they were clicking as they talked. I wondered if I was understanding the clicking or they were talking now. I supposed it didn't matter too much. "The horses here want to be your friends. They're super nice. I'm friends with their princess." They looked confused at the word 'princess'. "Their boss." That they understood. "She'll give you a place to live and be happy, just no more fighting."
One of them reared up and faced the other beetles running around wildly. "Hey, guys! The boss of the horses will give us a place to stay and no more punishments ever!"
A loud cheering click resounded through the crowd and the beetles began swarming towards the castle, abandoning their efforts to damage property or chase horses. Did I win? Was it over?
I felt the tension of conflict leaving a moment, only to quickly return. The ground beneath me rumbled just moments before the biggest beetle I ever saw erupted from in front of me. "Who dares to distract my horde?!" He turned his mandibles towards me. "You, child. You did this, didn't you?! I'll crush you!"
Despite being a beetle, he had big muscular arms, and he used one to make a swing at me, knocking me across the road to crash into a pie stand and make a huge mess. Blueberries everywhere. I scrambled out of the stand, a bit sore. I gobbled up the last of the corn as I went and the soreness faded as the huge beetle stomped towards me.
Beside him were two words. 'Flex' and 'Shout'. I dimly recalled a monster being flexed out. So I clasped my two little hands and made the most ridiculous flex I think I've ever had the opportunity to make.
The beetle drew up short. "What? You think you're even close to my league! Do you even lift, child?!" He clapped his hands together, all four of them, and his muscles began to bulge dangerously as he strained to show them off.
I turned to show him a profile as I knelt and struck a new pose, showing off my lack of muscles as if they were the biggest things ever. Each time I took a pose, I could see 'Flex' flash.
The beetle roared with laughter. "You should be ashamed of yourself! Look at these pectorals." He swung his arms over his chest and began to heave before his chest danced on its own, muscles rippling in a mighty display. Oh god, if he wanted to crush me, there'd be little I could do about it.
Maybe flexing wasn't enough on its own? I put my hands up over my head and clasped them in a new pose as I made a flexing pose and began to shout as if in effort. "Rrrrrawwwwwwgh!"
The beetle tilted his head. "What? Oh now it's on!" He began to shout with me as he curled his fists and spread his arms wide, screaming with a force to send chills down my spine. Oh please oh please. I hoped I was doing it right.
As my voice began to get sore, I let the shout die out. A new idea came to me. "You're truly mighty."
"You bet I am!" He stomped the ground in a display of his mightiness.
I clapped my hands together. "Cadance would really like to have someone like you around."
"What, who?"
I pointed to the castle. "The horse boss. She loves big strong people."
"S-she?" He went red right through his carapace. "Do... do you really think so?"
I nodded quickly. "Lots of horses are impressed by that kind of thing." Maybe a bit of a fib. Does running in a wild panic count as impressed? "You should flex for her, like we just did. I bet she'd offer you a job."
He narrowed his eyes at me. "What does she pay?"
Uh... "She doesn't punish beetles for being lazy."
"Sold!" His aura suddenly went yellow, then grey all at once. Even as I heard the jingle, he was stomping off, ready to give a flex audition for Cadance. I hoped she would take it in good sport. I let out a slow breath and slumped against the booth I was beside. I panted for breath as the tension left a bit by bit with every exhale.
I pushed up to my feet to come face-to-face with a horse. "Um, hi. Thanks for helping. Uh... I saw you talking with those beetles. How did you do that?"
Shoot, was I really clicking at them the whole time? "I just tried to see what they wanted. They only attacked because they had to."
The horse tilted his head to the left a little. "Oh, um, thank you again. I have to clean up my stall." He waved a little and trotted off to the pie stand. I winced as I realized that was the stand I had crashed through earlier.
At least I was alive. I turned to look at the castle, taking another slow breath. I would put this shadow thing to rest, and let the horses live peacefully, beetles included or not. I was filled with determination.
"Familiar!" Trixie came around the corner, trotting hurriedly. "There you are. Trixie has been looking for you. She would be very upset if her prized familiar were..." As she came closer, she seemed to notice the mess I was in. "Trixie is too late perhaps? Are you alright?" Her horn glowed brightly beneath her cap and the mess slid right off of me. "Ah, you look fine. You are as clever as Trixie thought. What did you do during that vicious attack?"
I pointed towards the castle. "I sent them there."
Her eyes widened. "What? Why would you send a bunch of murderous beetles to Cadance's throne?"
I shook my head quickly. "They aren't so bad. They're being bossed around."
Trixie tilted her head at me, peering suspiciously. "How do you know this for certain? Familiar, are you being secretive with Trixie? We are partners, I will remind."
"Great and Wonderful Trixie, I know that. I could understand them once we made peace."
Trixie splayed her ears out. "Perhaps my familiar is not as crazy as they seemed when they suggested to end this their way." She paused a moment. "This reminds Trixie. Are you a male human or a female human, or do humans not come in these varieties?" She flashed a grin. "Ha! Put that in your pipe, Twilight Sparkle. She may have made a dragon, but I conjured a creature unknown and unknowable, free of all standard gender qualifications."
She sure sounded proud of that fact, despite the fact that I hadn't even answered her. Which was I, anyway? Only one way to be sure! "Where's the bathroom?"
Trixie looked quite surprised. "Hmm? Oh! Well, Trixie supposes even humans have need of such things. Come, follow her and she will show you." She spun around and guided me away from the wrecked shopping plaza to an outhouse not too far away. She gestured towards the small building. "Trixie will ensure you have your privacy."
I scooted past her and stepped inside. It was quite spacious. That wasn't too surprising. It was made for four legged horses, not little children! I pulled out my waistband and took a quick peek. ... My shriek alerted Trixie, who flung the door open despite any promises of privacy. "What is it? Are you alright?!"
I released the band and it snapped back into place. "I... I don't have either..." I was sure I was a guy. I wasn't that anymore.
Trixie seemed baffled. "While Trixie is as amazed as you are that a species as advanced as you seem to be could be truly without gender, shouldn't you be aware of this?"
I took a little breath, and realized I was still standing in a horse restroom. Yuck. I stepped out slowly and stiffly. "I... A lot changed when I came here, to your world."
Trixie tapped at her chin. "Were you not a human?"
She wasn't going to be a great deal of help with this specific issue. "It's okay, Trixie, really... We may want to check on Cadance and all the beetles."
Trixie perked her ears. "Well, Trixie does not hear screaming coming from there, but a second glance couldn't hurt. Come, familiar." She wrapped her magic around me and gently hefted me up to her back. "Trixie understands you are upset right now. Relax. You've earned this." She trotted off with me.
As rewards went, a little odd, but darn it if riding Trixie wasn't actually kind of fun in a way.
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Obligatory flex off
!Nice Scene good work!
You have earned one like for use of Massive Majestic Muscles! Don't spend it all in one place!
6617780
6617814 We have made friends through muscles, the way god intended.
Now we just need to wait for Sans.....
understands (If she were speaking normally in first person it would be right as-is.)
6617887 A great and powerful typo, defeated!
6617900
TYPO GENOCIDE
6617918 We can reason with them, turn them back into understandable syntax.
6617924
Lets reason with them
NO. KILL THEM. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO.
nopenopenopenopenope.
Or better yet
The worst thing is that typos are very insidious. You have a typo in your author note denouncing typos!
> You convince a lone 'r' to mingle with 'had', forming 'hard'
6618015 It worked! You're good at this.
6611843 I am currently in an area named timmie village possibly breaking this worlds economy.
6618187 Ah, the temmies. A mighty and proud people, with a deep history.
6618239 The locals are very *ahem* interesting.
Scratches his antennae awkwardly.
KEEP GOING! This is getting better by the minute.
6618187 Temmie villiage is hilarious, it's always nice to check up on it and then get enough cash for one of them to go to college
But...how do they pee?
6619423 They haven't.
6619433
But they will eventually need to. One would think anyway
6619515
6619433
You will note that in the Underworld there were a lot of hints that monsters were biologically-immortal half-spirits.
Frisk's connection to monsters means that food and waste probably aren't a thing, at least while in the Underworld...
Or we could borrow a leaf from HandyMan's "Bad Mondays" fimfic and say that a "barbie+ken doll illusion" is in place.
"Do you even lift, child?!"
...you just did that.
6621578 No Regrets.
6622391 We would need Temmies to do that. They could be filled with DeTriximination!
6619423 Somewhere in the game, it says that Monster food turns into energy as soon as it enters the digestive system, making excrements non-existing in the Underground unless what they ate wasn't food.
Trixie seems like a bit of a downgrade from Toriel as far as mothering goes.
6651860 True, but Trixie is far more active.
Sorry if I'm being blunt, but Frisk is a girl in the game. Did you decide to make her genderless in this story knowing this?
6686496 [Citation Required]
6686496
No. Toby has confirmed Frisk is gender neutral. Frisk's gender is whatever the player wants it to be. That's why all the characters use gender neutral pronouns (They, Their, You) when referring to them. Even the name Frisk is gender neutral.
6686496 Where'd you get that info?
Frisk is gender neutral.
It's without sex. The sex of a creature refers to the physical parts determined by genetics. The gender is the mental identity one grows in relation to the sex. Thus Frisk here can be male without being a boy if he thinks of himself as a boy which he does because he was a boy at one point.
7108328 Can't argue that.
I half expected to hear/see magic blasts coming from within the Castle...
I mean, he just sent a bunch of seemingly hostile bug monsters (that maybe only he could understand) into a heavily guarded castle.