Link has beaten Majora and is searching for Navi in the Lost Woods when he
ends up in Equestria. The Hero of Time must fight any evil that gets in his way. Will the fate of Equestria rest on his shoulders?
Pony Link drawn by: Stellar Night22, The cutie mark is the song of time symbol and is not on there yet.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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That was... Quick...
Okay, a few things...
1. If you use a reference that you think nobody is going to get, don't put it down in the story. Example:
2: The character's lack of dialogue between each other is a big issue. A good story always has enough dialogue to help explain their emotions, which brings me to 3.
3. Your character's lack emotions. Even though you portrayed pinkie getting excited over RD's tricks, you still lacked emotions through all of the other characters.
4. Too many "said", this a common mistake among new writers. There are many different ways to express words, so use an encyclopedia if you need to.
5. Lack of setting. You didn't set a place or time of the story.
6. Way too short. Drawing out stories with a whole bunch of chapters can affect the alignment of the story. Sometimes it's better to have one huge page of gold, than a whole bunch of short chapters that are crap.
I hope this helps! ^_^
6618438 Sorry, I should have put that the mane 6 were near Fluttershy's cottage.
Also, Link is looking at Twilight and It says that she has wings.
Plus this takes place after Majora's Mask but it is too early in the story to know that.
I'm not much of a writer, so of course there will be mistakes.
Give me credit, I typed this in a matter of a few days between breaks in school.
(Response to #6)
Um... I needed a sufficient word count to make sure it gets approved.
BTW the prologue chapter is definitely not 71 word count!
Why is my story in HEROES group?
I didn't put that there!
Don't be afraid to comment! I always like to read the comments!
Why is this on hiatus?
6646983 I'm still Working on this! Ive got lots of chapters to go!
No spoilers!
6646983 Also... what does it mean when a story is on Hiatus?
I just assumed it meant it's getting worked on...
Great chapter keep up the good work.
6688390 What did you like about it?
6688402 mainly Link's cockey atatude. But over all good story telling like this always wins me over just try to make the chapters longer.
6688436 Link doesn't have a cocky attitude!
smooth link.
6770598 What is it?
And now to explain the events in "Majora's Mask"
6791620 Actually... Link is going to tell them about his first adventure first.
6796778 Well then..... Here's the Walkthrough for every Zelda game ever made already listed in Chronological Order
6797085 No need! I already have a copy of Ocarina of Time 3D and Majoras Mask 3D
6797187 Lolz and this is why Librarians are getting out of a job
Lolz All in good fun right friend??
6797257 ???? Librarians??? What?
6797274 I was making a joke about my user name I'm saying that I'm the Dimensional Librarian running a library that runs through out all time lines and universes giving me books about everything yada yada yada........
I hate having to explain my strange thought process
6797413 oh................
6797413 I love making jokes sometimes!
This story is on hiatus for a while... sorry guys...