Impressing the Girls part 1
Deadpool’s Equestria Girls Adventures!
Chapter Two
Winning over the crew part 1
Deadpool here! So after venturing into the void I stumbled upon the Equestria Girls universe…and got myself stuck in this pickle.
“So why again do I have to go to school with you girls?” I asked as I slipped into a Guns and Roses t-shirt
“Wade if you would remember what I said earlier then I think you would get your answer” Sunset replied
Three hours earlier…
“I still can’t believe I’m stuck with an idiot like you Wade Wilson!” Sunset complained “First I find out that I can’t just get rid of this ‘bundle of joy’ because you’re some sort of hideous mutant”
“Mutate” I corrected her
“Does it look like I care?” Sunset asked, obviously peeved by the circumstances “Then I find out that my child’s father is a killer by profession! I mean did you even pass high school?!”
“No.” I answered, not knowing what I had just gotten myself into until it was too late
Sunset turned to face me and stared into my eyes in disbelief “Repeat that?” She asked
It was too late. “I dropped out of high school. “ I admitted rubbing the back of my neck in guilt.
Present time
“Yeah I know, I know. You don’t want your child to be raised by a father that dropped out of high school.” I repeated back to her in relent. I hated high school, bullies always picking on me and the popular kids always laughing at my misfortunes. I was the class clown…But I guess that song was right. High school never ends. I’m still the class clown, even as an adult. I guess another shot couldn’t be that bad….could it?
Sunset gave me an annoyed look and grabbed my arm, dragging my finally clothed body out the door and outside her apartment “We’re gonna be late for the bus you dimwit!” She yelled as the bus pulled up to the bus stop outside her apartment. Sunset’s apartment wasn’t that bad…I mean it wasn’t my place so it was definitely an improvement. Finally getting a look at the outside of her apartment I would say that her digs are quite nice. How she got them comes to mind but I decided not to anger my new roommate so soon.
“Just be glad she isn’t like the last girl you slept with”
“Let’s not bring that up”
What he said.
We both rushed to the bus, getting on just before the bus closed its doors and took off without us. As we climbed the stairs of the bus to find a seat I heard someone yell the words “HEY LOOK IT’S THE FREAK!” from somewhere in the seats
“Are they talking about me?” I asked as my girlfriend sighed
“No….they’re talking about me.” Sunset replied with an annoyed groan. I shot the pest a dirty look and he responded with a sneer “Are you her new boyfriend? What a freak!” I was THIS close to decking the jerk before Rainbow Dash yelled from the back
“HEY! LEAVE HER ALONE JERKWAD!” I heard the jock yell in defense of her friend as the two of us sat next to our multicolor friend “Sorry about that Sunset. SOME OF US DON’T KNOW MANNERS!” Dash yelled as she shook her fist at the bully
“It’s okay Dash…I’m used to it.” Sunset replied with a sigh “I just have to deal with it. I did try to mind control the school after all. “
“Yeah I feel ya sister. High school sucks” I responded, Dash shooting me a dirty look
“Look WADE I don’t trust low life creeps like you so back off!” Dash roared in my face as I turned to find another seat
“Just great. Now our waifu hates us”
“I thought Fluttershy was our waifu…”
Eh. It’s still a toss up….though either way I’m fucked
I sat in an empty seat in the back of the bus as my new girlfriend sat three rows ahead next to Rainbow Dash. I heard the girls talk as I sat lonely until a familiar girl came to the back and sat next to me
“Hi….I’m Derpy Doo. You seem lonely. Mind if I sit next to you?” The girl introduced herself with her one eye wandered off. She concentrated for a second getting her lazy eye to straighten out as she giggled nervously “Sorry. It tends to do that…you don’t think I’m weird do you?”
“What’s wrong with weird?” I asked, smiling at the girl while my inner voices fangirled at the sight of the almighty Derpy
Derpy smiled at that, giggling an adorable laugh as the bus pulled up to the school. We all got out and I stopped Derpy as we got off the bus “Hey Derpy…if anyone calls you weird…just tell them thank you…normalcy is overrated anyways!”
Derpy smiled at that and nodded as the two of us got off the bus
As I made my way into the school I pulled my class schedule out of my new backpack and looked it over. While it wasn’t exactly an easy task of getting me into the school, Twilight getting lucky on her arrival while I had to fill out freakin paperwork, it wasn’t impossible, although explaining WHY I was applying was another task entirely. I swear I have never been slapped so hard by one of my idols, although I gotta give Luna props for actually leaving a mark that lasted an hour.
“ALL PRAISE THE LUNAR REPUBLIC!”
“I resent that. I support the Solar Empire”
We are NOT having this argument AGAIN!
My two voices retreated to their corners and went silent for a while as I looked over my schedule “Okay so first I got chemistry….sounds promising, as long as I don’t blow up the school I should be fine!” I said to myself as a familiar trio ran by me
I looked over to the three girls ‘I swear my knowledge of the show is gonna get annoying after a while…WHAT AM I SAYING?! I’m living any brony’s dream! And yet….it’s surprisingly underwhelming. I mean sure I know them but they don’t know ME. Honestly it’s a first for me.’ I thought as the three Crusaders ran off
I made my way to the class room and walked in, the other students all watching me like hawks as I took my seat. Luckily for me I had one person that walked in and lifted my spirit
“WADE!” I heard Pinkie yell as she threw her arms up in glee and rushed over to sit next to me, staring patiently at the guy next to me for a second, the guy relenting with a frustrated groan after a few minutes, giving the seat up to the Pink ball of energy.
“Soooo…about Sunset….my bad?” Pinkie asked to me in her cheery, yet guilty tone. While I wanted to be mad at the girl, she was probably the only guaranteed friend I had in this school, so I decided to give her a break. After all, if I’m gonna survive this high school nightmare I’m gonna have to get into a cliq and Pinkie was the gateway to any possibility of getting a group of friends
Just as Pinkie opened her mouth to talk to me the teacher walked in and the classroom went silent as the teacher walked up to the board and wrote his name in dry eraser
MR. NEUTRON the board read as I immediately asked out of instinct “Where’s your robot dog?”
The teacher turned to me and stared for a moment as I felt my soul being pierced by the gaze of the man in a blue suit. After piercing my soul the teacher let out a boisterous laugh before wiping his eyes and saying “Finally! Someone who can tell a joke! Seriously guys, lighten up!” The teacher walked up to the board and began to look around the room with a wide smile on his face “I mean what’s with all this negativity? Perk up and smile! It’s only chemistry!”
Me and Pinkie looked at each other and smiled, adding a little song to the conversation
“Come on everybody, smile, smile ,smile! Fill your hearts up with sunshine, sunshine!” Pinkie sang as I whistled the backup tune
Mr. Neutron looked over to us and exclaimed “Exactly! These two got the picture! Chemistry is fun! Sure it’s early in the morning but who cares when you get a chance to do things like this!” Mr. Neutron walked over to a freezer in the back of the room and pulled out a water bottle, filled with clear liquid before walking back to the front of the room.
Mr. Neutron held the bottle up to his face and spoke like a magician “Now it’s liquid…” He then tapped the bottom of the bottle with his fist and it instantly began to freeze from the inside, the water becoming a frozen chunk inside the plastic in mere moments “And now it’s not!” Mr. Neutron declared passing the ice filled bottle around as the students stood in awe, Pinkie yelling “ARE YOU A WIZARD?!” after inspecting the frozen bottle for a solid minute
“I’m pretty sure that was more a physics experiment then a chemistry experiment”
“Who cares? It was awesome!”
Mr. Neutron took back the bottle and let out a hearty laugh “No miss Pinkie! I’m not a wizard. Although many things science can do could be considered magic!”
“Like friendship!” Pinkie yelled causing Mr. Neutron to let out another laugh
“Yes Pinkie, just like friendship.” Mr. Neutron replied with a smile
The next hour Mr. Neutron showed off a couple more science experiments, explaining them as he went along. After chemistry I made my way through the rest of my day leisurely, staying half awake through my next two classes, English and History, until I came across my favorite gentle soul in a back hallway kneeling and talking to what looked like herself.
Using my incredible stealth I snuck in, pushing my body up against the lockers silently as I peeked around the corner and saw Fluttershy and her furry friends. With her was a pigion, the familiar face of the nuisance known as Angel, and a grey puppy that could only be about a few days old. I listened as Fluttershy spoke to the animals
“Oh I’m sorry mister wolf pup but I can’t feed you until we get back to the shelter. you’ll just have to wait” Fluttershy said with a hint of annoyance and a larger part worry as the little puppy whined “If Principal Celestia finds out I’ve been bringing animals on school grounds again I’ll be in big trouble and the animal shelter will fire me! Oh what to do?!”
“Perhaps I could help.” I spoke revealing myself to the shy girl. Fluttershy let out a loud eep but seemed to calm down after the initial fright
“Wade…I heard what happened with you and Sunset” Fluttershy spoke, a hint of uneasiness in her voice as she looked at me in a gaze of mistrust. It really sucked being a brony that was hated or mistrusted by more than half the characters you cheered for as a fan.
I smiled and knelt down in front of the wolf pup"How old is he?"
"He's about two and a half weeks old. We just got him off the bottle yesterday" Fluttershy explained in her signature whisper
“What’s his name?”
“He doesn’t have one. We found his mother dead last week after a run in with a full grown stag in the forest north of here. The poor mother must have been desperate to take on the deer alone. She didn’t stand a chance. After we took him to the shelter my boss told me to find it a home. Wolves are pack creatures and this one won’t survive long without a family since the shelter doesn’t take in wild predators like wolves and if we don't find him a home by the end of the week he'll be too old to form a bond. My boss said if I found it a home I would get promoted.” Fluttershy explained as the wolf pup batted at my hands playfully. The pup seemed to be completely unaware of the danger it was in, should Fluttershy not find him a home…So I made a split second decision.
“Fluttershy…I want to adopt Balto.” I said standing up, my chest puffed out and arms at my side in an attempt to make myself look confident
“Balto? Why Balto?” Fluttershy asked as the puppy jumped at the sound of his new name
I smiled as I thought back to my childhood. “Come by Sunset’s place later and I’ll show you.” I said as I knelt back down and began to pet the wolf pup
“Are you sure? Taking care of an animal requires a lot of responsibility and patience and you don’t seem to have much of either” Fluttershy spoke in a concerned tone
“Geez, even Fluttershy is dissing us!”
“Sad fact is she’s not exactly wrong either”
Looking into the eyes of the pup I felt a connection form as the little one stared back at me with an innocent gaze…but I saw deeper. As I looked into the pup’s eyes I saw a feeling of loneliness and fear, feelings I knew all too well. I looked back at Fluttershy and nodded “Yes. I’m sure. I gotta learn responsibility somehow especially with Sunset’s pregnancy and all and Balto should be the perfect way to do so.”
We then heard the sound of a woman clearing her throat as we turned to see Vice Principal Luna standing in front of us “Fluttershy I thought I told you that the no pets rule was nonnegotiable.” Luna spoke in a stern demeanor
Standing in front of Fluttershy, I spoke up in her defense “Vice Principal Luna, Fluttershy was put in charge of this wolf pup and has no right to be punished for only doing her job given to her by the animal shelter! Punish me all you want but don’t punish Fluttershy!”
Vice Principal Luna raised her eyebrow at this “Is this true Fluttershy?”
Fluttershy nodded and picked up the wolf pup, carefully putting him in her backpack
Vice Principal Luna turned back to me “Well surprisingly I have no reason to punish either of you if that is the case. Please just get to class and stay out of trouble” Luna said, looking me in the eye as she said the last part of her sentence before walking off
Fluttershy turned to me and smiled “Thanks Wade. Perhaps you aren’t as bad as I thought you were. Come by the animal shelter after school and we’ll fill out the paper work for you to adopt Balto and then you can show me where you got that name”
“No sweat Fluttershy! I couldn’t let an innocent girl get punished for something that they didn’t have any control over! I’ll meet you after school so you can show me where to go alright?” I replied, holding out my hand for a hand shake
“Sure. I’ll come by Sunset’s apartment and pick you up” Fluttershy accepted, shaking my hand before smiling and walking off
“Let’s just hope Sunset doesn’t mind having a puppy around the house” I said before making my way to the lunchroom
I entered the lunchroom and looked around for somewhere to sit. I saw several people I remembered from the movie including The CMC, The hippies, Mr. Waifu Stealer, and...hold on is she waving at me? I saw in the corner of the room the sight of Derpy waving over in my direction. Looking at her, I pointed to myself in confusion as she nodded furiously and I walked over to the blonde goofball.
“Are you sure you want me to sit with you Derpy?” I asked the girl as she chuckled and flashed me a goofy grin
“Of course Wade! Why wouldn’t I?” Derpy asked as if I was asking something trivial, like whether or not the sky was blue. I shrugged my shoulders and sat down, pulling my lunch bag out of my bottomless backpack
As I pulled out my lunch another familiar face sat down at our table “Yo Derpy! How’s it hangin’?”
“Oh just fine Vinyl. I actually made a new friend! Vinyl Scratch, meet Wade Wilson.” Derpy replied to her DJ friend
“So you’re the infamous Wade Wilson everyone’s talking about! What’s it like being the new kid on the block?” Vinyl asked holding a supposedly fake microphone up to me
‘Wow she really does sound like Nowacking’ I thought as I answered the disk jockey “Well the weird looks are kinda off putting but I’m kinda used to it so not much different than most places I go. Gotta say that I’m surprised I haven’t been thrown out yet. Usually when I go to schools they throw me out within the first twenty minutes”
Vinyl nodded and let out a wicked smile before asking “Are you the dude who knocked up Sunset Shimmer?”
Looking around in panic, I made sure no one had heard that before replying “…..yes. How did you find out?”
Vinyl simply smirked “You know how they say rumors go down the grapevine?”
“Yeah…”
“Well at this school…I’m the grapevine.” Vinyl answered with a smirk
“Just promise me you won’t tell anyone. Sunset is already in deep water with the students for what she did at the fall formal and I don’t want her to be ridiculed even more.” I replied with a frustrated sigh “I don’t need to give her anymore reasons to hate me more than she already does”
Vinyl smiled and nodded “Alright bro. I’ll do my best but I can’t guarantee anything. I’m not the only source of gossip in this school after all. So where exactly are you from Wade? I mean you’re not from around here or else I would have heard of you so what gives?”
“Yeah I was wondering that as well” Derpy added
“I’m….not from this dimension. I was just kinda visiting when I ran into Sunset and her crew and now I have to stay due to the whole pregnancy situation.” I answered
“You aren’t here to take over the world are you?” Derpy asked in a worried tone
I let out a laugh at that thought. Me? Ruler of the world? Sounds worse than the Saint’s Row guy being president…oh wait that happened.
“Nah. I just needed a break from my usual mercenary business”
“Mercenary?” Vinyl asked “Are you telling me you’re a badass bounty hunter?”
“Yup. I’m known as The Merc with the Mouth Deadpool!” I replied, my ego taking hold
“Deadpool? What are you some kind of superhero?” Derpy asked with a light chuckle at the thought
“Eh, more of an anti-hero. Hey, in my world it’s a lot more common than you’d think. There are hundreds of heroes just in New York!”
“Sounds awesome!” Vinyl replied as she pulled a small unfinished box out of her backpack along a screwdriver, beginning to play around with the insides of the box.
“What’s that?” I asked, curiously looking at the electronic gadget
“Oh this? It’s a mini speaker I’ve been tinkering with. When it’s finished it should be able to output the same as the speakers they use in clubs and only be the size of a baseball!” Vinyl explained
“Huh…never saw you as a tinkerer.” I replied with an impressed look
“Yeah, not many people know that about me. Other than Octy and Derpster, you’re the only one.” Vinyl answered back as she continued to play with her gadget
The rest of the school day went by without anything worth mentioning, Me sleeping through study hall and spanish and math were filled with name games, the spanish teacher being pleasantly surprised when I went the entire class speaking to her in perfect Spanish. My final class, gym, getting called off due to a student throwing up in the gymnasium.
As I made my way to the bus I saw Sunset sitting in the back alone and I skeptically made my way over to her as I saw her holding back tears “What happened to you?”
Sunset didn’t even look up at me as she answered “Some guys from the football team were *sniff* being jerks and called me a slut. It turns out the entire school knows about what happened.”
I took a deep breath as I resisted the urge to go all Liem Neeson on the football players asses. I sat next to Sunset and regretfully looked down at my lap “Where’s Rainbow?”
Sunset closed her eyes and let out a breath as she looked away in frustration “She’s in detention. After I told her what happened she got in a fight with the guys and got caught by one of the gym teachers. The only reason she’s not expelled is because Principal Celestia found out about what the football players had said about me.”
Clutching my fist tightly I took yet another deep breath, deciding to change the subject. “Well in other news, we’re going to have a new roommate soon”
Sunset, with eyes still watery, turned to me in confusion “What do you mean? Wade you better not be planning any surprise visits from one of your superhero friends.”
“Oh no! Nothing like that! I met up with Fluttershy earlier and saw that she was taking care of a wolf puppy so I decided to adopt it!” I replied with a nervous smile “She was gonna pick me up later and take me to fill out the paper work at the shelter!”
Wiping her eyes Sunset let out a short laugh as she answered back “Yeah, Fluttershy told me about that. She said that you were going to show her something as well. What was up with that?”
“Oh yeah! Do you have a VCR?” I asked, crossing my fingers
“Yes. Why?”
“Well I was gonna show Fluttershy an old movie where I got the name of our new puppy! It’s a gem from my childhood so I only have it on VHS” I answered back with a grin
“Oh…okay then. I’ll make some popcorn for you guys then. You don’t mind if I watch as well do you?” Sunset asked
“Oh hell yeah! The more the merrier!” I said as the bus took off
I sat in Sunset’s living room as I heard the doorbell ring. Getting up, I walked up to the door and answered seeing Fluttershy waiting there “Hey Fluttershy! I’ve been waiting for you!”
“Well I said I’d pick you up so why don’t we get going?” Fluttershy responded as the two of us made our way down to Fluttershy’s car.
As we drove to the shelter I looked around the car and noticed a small green notebook sticking out of the glove compartment. Out of curiosity I took it out and began looking through it, seeing multiple unfinished pencil sketches of animals she’d seen “Fluttershy these are really good! Are you taking an art class?”
Fluttershy looked over and nearly hit the breaks in panic as she answered nervously “No. I‘m not good enough to take art class”
“Are you kidding?! These are amazing! I mean I’m no expert in art and all but jeez! How long did it take you to draw these?” I replied in disbelief
“About an hour or so.”Fluttershy responded as she pulled into the parking lot of the animal shelter
“Fluttershy you are really selling yourself short on this and I cannot stand for it! Tomorrow I want you to go to your councilor and ask to switch to an art class!” I proclaimed as Fluttershy parked the car and turned off the engine
“Are you sure Wade? I mean I’ve never drawn anything for someone else so what if I fail?” Fluttershy asked worrily
“Oh don’t you worry Fluttershy! I promise that when your teacher sees your work she’ll be super impressed! Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!” I said as I performed the sacred motions of the Pinkie Swear
“Alright, I’ll trust you Wade. But if you are wrong then I’ll be very disappointed in you” Fluttershy replied as the two of us exited the car and made our way into the building
As soon as we entered I saw the wolf pup running around trying to get the other dogs to play with him to no avail as the other dogs seemed to either ignore him or hide from him “Poor thing. He’s been trying for a week to make a friend but all the other animals seem to be afraid of him. Angel especially seems to think he’s going to eat him” Fluttershy spoke as she went behind the counter and pulled out a small stack of papers
“An animal that scares Angel? Want NOW!”
“At least he isn’t afraid of us”
Pulling a pen from my pocket I began to sign the papers in my signature style of ‘scriblture’ as I read over the text of the papers carefully, making sure that I wasn’t unintentionally selling my soul as well, years of dealing with backstabbing clients and tricksters like Loki making me paranoid about paperwork. Finally finishing, Fluttershy took the papers to the back before coming out and picking up my new pet and handing him over to me
“Here’s your new pet wolf, Balto Wilson. You are now the legal owner and guardian of this creature and should you mistreat this animal you will be fined and sent to jail. There are no refunds for your new pet and the Canterlot Animal Shelter is not responsible for any incidents that are caused by or happen to your new pet. Please take care of your new animal as you would any other family member and have a nice day” Fluttershy recited before wiping her forehead and making her way to the front from behind the counter “Alright. Now you were going to show me where you got that name right?”
“Yup! Back to Sunset’s!” I yelled as we exited the building and got back into Fluttershy’s car
We both entered Sunset’s apartment and saw Sunset fiddling with the VCR “Oh hey you two! I was just getting the darn VCR to work. It keeps thinking it’s midnight!” Sunset greeted the two of us as we walked in, Balto running in and immediately beginning the exploration of his new home
“Sunny, let the master handle this.” I said as I picked up the VCR and gave it a light tap and it instantly turned on and corrected itself, along with the TV setting itself to the right setting.
“How in Equestria did you do that?!” Sunset yelled prompting the neighbors to yell from the next room over “AW SHADAP!” Sunset yelled back in a surprising New York accent
“….when did you get a New York accent?” I asked caught off guard by the change in Sunset’s voice
“I grew up in Manehatten” Sunset replied as I pulled out a VHS copy of one of my favorite animated flicks of all time, Balto, popping it into the VCR and motioning the girls to sit on the couch as the movie started, Sunset running to the kitchen and bringing a large batch of fresh popcorn back with her.
ONE HOUR AND FIFTY MINUTES LATER
The three of us cheered as we watched the animated Wolf dog Balto race the dog sled team back to the Alaskan town of Nome with the song “Reach for the Light” playing in the background, Fluttershy being the loudest of all of us reminding me of the Sonic Rainboom episode as she yelled “GO BALTO GO!” at the top of her lungs
As the movie ended The two girls sitting next to me sat happily as I turned off the movie and turned to them asking “So….what did you think?”
“That was awesome!” Sunset blurted
“As awesome as me?” I asked leaning in to hear her answer
“No. You’re nowhere near as cool as Balto Wade” Sunset replied with a smirk
“Well, you’re not wrong” I replied as I turned to Fluttershy “So what about you? What did you think?”
Fluttershy smiled and spoke up in her normal soft voice “I really liked it. Balto was a hero even when no one believed in him. That’s something that can really be admired”
I looked over to my new buddy Balto, who sat on the couch happily and asked “What about you little buddy? What did you think?”
Balto simply barked happily as I replied “Me too Balto.”
Fluttershy and Sunset sat at the dinner table as I went to cooking a meal for the three of us, Me having to force Fluttershy to stay so I could impress the two of them and while I wasn’t any master chef their was one thing I was an expert at making: Lasagna. (Well that, pancakes, and Chimichangas but who’s keeping track!)
Me
You don’t count. Anyways following my mother’s old recipe I prepared the noodles, pan, and cheese using my life cheat codes to jump ahead a few paragraphs of Brad talking about how my mother used to make this for me before she died of cancer to when it was all ready to begin cooking.
But Backstory Wade! We can’t just skip that kind of stuff! It’s important to the narrative!
Maybe for you but to me it’s just filler so see you later! Anyways yeah…I remember my mother slaving away for hours on holidays making the perfect batches of Lasagna, you know the stuff Garfield has wet dreams about. It was never too soupy or too hard and had a perfect mixure of cheddar, mozzarella, and swiss cheese along with a sprinkle of garlic salt on each layer. It was probably the only time I’ve ever felt like I had a legitimate family that loved me for who I am.
You done Brad?
Yes…
Good because the food is ready to bake! Opening up the oven, I carefully put the lasagna in and set it for three hours before I pulled another finished batch of lasagna out of hammer space “And now ladies and gentlemen, This is what it looks like finished! As you can see it is golden brown and the cheese is melted to perfection! Now let’s see what the judges think!” I said as I brought the batch out to the two girls “Dinner is served!”
“Wow. When you said you could cook lasagna in twenty minutes I thought for sure that you were joking.” Sunset said as she handed Fluttershy a ten dollar bill under the table
“Well then let’s get eatin!” I said in a mock Texan accent
The three of us each cut a piece of the lasagna and began eating, Fluttershy taking a moment to register the flavor before eating a little bit faster while Sunset dug in after her first bite, her face before her first bite indicating that she must have thought that I had tainted the meal or something. What surprised me the most was, despite rigorously shoveling through the lasagna, Sunset somehow didn’t get a single drop of pasta sauce anywhere other than her mouth. I bet you wish you could do that Brad!
Don’t make me hurt you Wade
Ha! I’d like to see you try!
Oh I will…just wait until you guys meet up with the Avengers and Logan in chapter 10
“Once again…that’s not fucking ominous!”
“So Wade…I heard Derpy and Vinyl talking about you. What was up with that?” Fluttershy asked
“Oh yeah, Derpy befriended me on the bus this morning and we had lunch together where I met Vinyl. They were pretty cool so I decided to hang out with them.” I explained as I continued to eat
“Well…someone wasn’t taught proper dinner edicate. “Sunset commented as I put my fork down and waved her off
"Well excuuuuse me princess!" I replied with a smirk
Fluttershy couldn’t help chuckling at us as she voiced a not-so-popular opinion “You two sound like a married couple”
Both Sunset and I turned and looked at our guest in either confusion or anger….you can guess who was which
“What?! No we don’t!” I yelled in denial
"Yes you do!”
“I do NOT sound like I’m married to this imbacile!” Sunset roared as I turned to her and asked the question that had lingering in my head for the past day
“You really do hate me, don’t you?”
Sunset looked me in the eye and gave me a deadpan stare “You knocked me up, forced me to have to live with you, and gave the school yet another reason to make fun of me. Of course I hate you!”
Depressed, I got up from the table and walked out of the room with my head hung low and my spirits crushed, finally ending up in the guest room bed, the door to the room left wide open and my head buried in the single pillow and laid there silently
“Sunset that was unnessessary!” Fluttershy spoke to her friend in a disappointed tone
“Look Fluttershy, Tell me that you wouldn’t feel the same way I do if you were in my shoes!” Sunset shot back
Fluttershy went quiet for a moment before responding “I guess you’re right there-“
“SEE!” Sunset yelled, interrupting her shy friend
Fluttershy held up her hand, signaling Sunset to be silent as the her pink locked friend continued “Although that doesn’t give you the right to harass him. While he may be annoying and a bit of a nuisance, he still has feelings. Feelings that you hurt Sunset Shimmer.”
Sunset was about to retort but Fluttershy, getting up from the table said something that silenced the former unicorn in an instant “After all…what would Twilight think?”
Sunset sat there, her arms crossed in frustration as she pouted in defeat, Fluttershy walking over to the guest room and sitting down next to Wade “I’m sorry about what Sunset said Wade. If it’s any consolation I’ll be your friend.” Fluttershy spoke to Wade’s unresponsive body
Wade simply lay there as Fluttershy pulled a piece of paper out of the backpack that lay next to my bed and wrote a small note that she left on the bedside table before walking out and picking up her things.
“Sunset, I think you should give Wade a chance. He’s not as bad as you think.” Fluttershy lectured her friend as she walked out the door
Sunset lay in her bed, conflicted by her thoughts. On one hand she had every right to hate her new roommate, yet on the other hand she knew Fluttershy was right…she hadn’t even given Wade a chance. But the question remained…did he even deserve it?
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Don't have an editor yet so you Grammer Nazies can open the flood gates
Oooooooooooooooooooooo pwhed by sunset
OK. Still not sure how I feel about the first chapter, but this one I liked.
6605595 yeah the first three chapters following the intro chapter are all gonna be about Wade winning over the Humain 5, minus Pinkie of course. After that I'll be introducing some actual conflict with the reveal of the main villain in chapter 5
Don't forget, I proofread this grammar Nazi's nightmare!
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I HAVE THE FALLOUT KINGDOM BOW UNDERME! IM LIKE THE NAZIS BUT BETTER!
First things is I like this and can't wait for chapter 10 and second is this feels more like deadpools on 16 and pregnant
6604242 I'm German so I have the right to be a Nazi
Hahahahahaha! Jimmy motherfucking Neutron!
The references! They're everywhere! Oh and I love those Saints Row games. This is a reference to number 4.
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Oh, Wade should kill Sunset for how she's treating him! He's killed for less, and this fucking cunt...I want her either whimpering at the thought of being confrontational with him or dead! Also, as far as stopping Deadpool goes, the cops ain't gonna do shit. They ain't gonna do shit. Even if they were capable of posing a threat to him, there are ways to physically wreck someone like Sunset and force her to stay silent. The constant threat-made clear that it's a very real one-of death hanging over one's head does wonders at times. If you think they might try to call from somewhere away from you? Then you just have to make sure that the both of you are never apart. Classes, lunch, even the bathroom. Live together, board up her apartment's windows and doors before bed, crush her phone(s), and tie her to the bed every night so that she can't stab you in the back. That, or just sever her achilles tendons, even if it means that she'll never walk again. Ah, and everytime she lashes out, just beat her senseless the 1st time, then start breaking bones for each time she does after the 1st. Of course, if word of any of this were to ever get out, you'd kill her. If you're going down, then you might as well take her with you. So basically, fully make her your bitch until the day you die. Lastly, Sunset deserves a chance even less than Deadpool. Anyway, I love you (no homo) and this story.