• Member Since 31st Aug, 2011
  • offline last seen Nov 24th, 2012

Raefire


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Just as Twilight learns of a major revelation in her life, Fluttershy is possessed by the evil entity that corrupted Princess Luna long ago. Now Twilight must face her new destiny - and lead the surviving ponies on a quest to save their friend...possibly at the ultimate cost.

Chapters (7)
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Comments ( 22 )

The original Night of the Shy entry will be deleted in a few days, just to note. Move your watches over, folks!

Won't hold my breath on this one, but I hope it won't be as bloody as last time :P Was a bit off-putting to say the least... :rainbowwild:
Otherwise I like the idea and your writing style, =]

35378
Breathe easy. It won't be so bloody this time around, I promise.

Woah, this is some remake and it is off to a good start. I mean it's the first chapter and Pinkie is already in her depress mode. :pinkiesad2:

Also, Twilight in training become a Princess in waiting and Prince Blueblood a baker ? Very interesting times a head in this story of yours. :twilightblush:

Nice job on the remake as I cannot wait to see how you will handle the SUn Summer Celebration.

Great update as this was WAY BETTER and more in-depth than original tale. :yay:

I must say Fluttershy's courage of not giving up on finding Winnoa was a cute and brave moment as well as Zecora trying to follow her.

That "Nightmare" being is a powerful one, as she took on the WHOLE DIAMOND DOGS people into her power along with the will of gaining assistance of the Cockaties. :fluttershysad:

This is going to be Some fight that the girls will be involved in. Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one. :twilightsmile:

I have to admit, this is much improved over the previous version. I'm curious to see how you progress the story in future chapters :twilightsmile:

WOW, this storyline is WAY BETTER THAN BEFORE. :pinkiehappy:

Twice the excitment than ever.:pinkiegasp:

I mean just WOW, these chapters were worth the wait. :ajsmug:

Now I do wonder whether or not we will get to see the Cutie Mark Crusaders and their reactions to the fight, I mean how would Scootaloo feel knowing her idol is now...dead ? :scootangel:

And the fight with the mutated mosters of the Mane 6 pets was just twice as better than before.

I must say I was surprised to learn you killed Derpy Hooves in this storyline. :derpytongue2:

Still, this is some update and it now makes me wonder who can truly replace the fallen Elements and help save the day ? :rainbowhuh:

I have to say Rainbow Dash's death was a bit sudden, but once she had her dream realize I should have known that it was the end for her. :rainbowderp:

Still, Shock after shock as I now await to see the rest of this storyline and I cannot wait to see what is next in this tale of yours. So please do keep up the good work. :trixieshiftright:

167068

Thanks. Like I said before, I know I'm a far better writer than the original version of this story showed. I just shucked out the first version without really putting much thought into it. This time, I have a plan. There will definitely be reactions from certain characters to certain events in the near future. But I'm not going to spoil all the surprises! I will try to get the next chapter out faster, but I can't guarantee anything. I may just find myself writing 21,000+ words again...

Anyways, glad to know you're enjoying the story!

OH SNAP....:pinkiegasp:

Truly a lot to take in for this updated chapter.:pinkiesad2:

First off, what a coinendence of this chapter being updated the same day a Fluttershy related episode was on FIM. :yay:

Secondly, I still can't believe you killed...:derpytongue2:. That's just wrong. :fluttercry:

Third, Scootaloo's big moment or two within this chapter makes this update worth it. Along with her pep talk to Gilda and how they tried to save the ponies of Pony-ville. :scootangel:

Also I must say that Nightmare Is clever one and a creepy one as well.

Still for Twilight to try to think of a way out manuver her a bit was something else. :twilightblush:

I also must say that Applejack's moments in this story was just like her character...proud and protective of her family. :ajsmug:

Great job with the overall chapter and nice moment between Pinkie and Scootaloo as it seems that Pinkie's origin story was mention in this storyline. :pinkiecrazy:

Great job indeed as I wish foryou to keep up the good work upon such a great storyline like this one as it sems that this remake of yours is worth the wait and that the NEW Elements of Harmony are a group in the making. If they can get their own ego moments out of the way...then they should be fine. :trixieshiftright:

Once again please do keep up the good work. :twilightsmile:

Not the PARASPRITES! :raritydespair: Especially not the ones that Twilight :facehoof: modified and eat objects instead of food! :raritycry:

Shit just got real son! :pinkiegasp:

Man, you gave Pinkie pie a bit more depth into her character than the show ever did...and that was just in one chapter.:pinkiegasp:

This story just took a dark turn in a way that is both exciting and scary at the same time. :rainbowderp:

Still, it was a nice update and a nice outlook on what happen at the battle for Caterlot.

Nice indepth look at the previous history of Prince Blue Blood and it sort of explains his change of character a bit.

Great look into the families of the Mane 6, as well as their allies.

I can almost see a new friendship being formed between Gilda and the new Pinkie Pie...a much darker flip coin from the former Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie Friendship. :rainbowlaugh:

Man, that cliffhanger is one I cannot believe, as the drama is going to be an emotional rank of 11. :pinkiesad2:

Please so keep up the good work upon such a great storyline like this one as it going to be an interesting next chapter.

What a great chapter, I can't wait until the next one comes out :pinkiehappy:
Bring on the excitement!!

Before anyone asks for specifics, Birostris = 2,080 metres tall, 1,080 metres long and 1 kilometre wide. Godzilla's a flea in comparison. :twilightsmile:

And yes, Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust was (partially) the inspiration. I would've had a parody of a Lefthand line in there, but "Enh, what's the sound of one hoof clopping" would've just...yeah, no.

HOLY FLANK, that cliffhanger. :raritystarry:

Nightmare is truly going to pay now that little Sweetie Belle is....dead. :raritycry:

I must say great job on this storyline as it was another wonderful update coming from you.

I mean First off nice to see Pinkie Pie get so emotional and finally cut lose her frustration over the whole ordeal so far and even made peace with her family all in one chapter.:pinkiehappy:

I also enjoyed Gilda's inclusion into the gang as their replacement for Rainbow Dash, as it seems that she has a bit more sass than Dashie did and is a bit more rough around the feathers so to speak. Plus she is a great laugh at time when it is need.:rainbowlaugh:

I must say I'm surprise with the Rarity and Blueblood romance idea, but I wonder what is Spike's reaction in all of this...maybe a future baby-sitter ? :moustache:

Nice job seeing the girls get their journey started as it maybe a long time before they can get back to Ponyville or Cancerlot and Stop Nightmare. Although this is starting out to be an interesting adventure.

I did love seeing Pinkie's family and how much they change since Pinkie Last met them. A lot of emotional baggage and healing was done within this chapter. :pinkiehappy:

However, the shocker ending to this chapter was poor Sweetie Belle as I almost thought she would have made it out alive, but to be that close and yet so far and end up flamed to death just as she was learning her magic...what a way to go. :raritycry:

Rarity's going to be PO'ed and sad when she learns of this. A very emotional mare indeed. :twilightangry2:

Plus the battles within this chapter shows the threat that Nightmare is building up and the hopelessness of the Elements return. :fluttercry:

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one.

863662

"Cancerlot"? :rainbowhuh: Hrm...I could use that in a future line of Nightmare's...

...and I'll only say this: A cliffhanger is called a cliffhanger because it doesn't have a resolution. :unsuresweetie:

863894
Sweetie Belle finally gets all bad ass, and you kill her off?! :facehoof:
iambrony.steeph.tp-radio.de/mlp/gif/133027617488.gif

866928

You'll have to wait until the next chapter to find out if that assumption of yours is true or not. :moustache:

Like I said, a cliffhanger is called a cliffhanger because it has no resolution. :unsuresweetie:

867080 No, It's called a cliffhanger, cause we readers hang Authors over it till they give us the next chapter! :flutterrage:

I regret to inform everyone here, but Raefire has passed away.
Yes, really.
http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198025758848

I'm sorry.

:pinkiecrazy:Death Despair and Destruction... Delightful :pinkiecrazy:

The roar woke Applejack up. She could hear something falling from the sky, and fast. She looked up – just in time to cover her ears as the dive-bombing Fluttershy shattered the sound barrier, the deafening CRACK accompanied by a brilliant yellow-pink shockwave that bent more than a few trees backwards. Hearing the boom, the creature snarling over her turned to look – as Fluttershy slammed down onto it, her speed drilling it down a few metres into the ground. When the dust cleared out of the crater created, Applejack could see Fluttershy had the creature pinned, her hooves stomped on its throat with so much pressure that it was choking a bit. The yellow pony's wings were locked forward like blades, pointed right at the beast's eyes. And Fluttershy's eyes were also locked onto the creature's, boiling with rage, fixed in – The Stare. Applejack had never actually seen The Stare herself, despite knowing Fluttershy for a very long time – but even without being its target, she had to look away from the intensity of it.

Welp that monster's screwed...😨

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