Human. Writer. Bearded. Feel free to chat with me.
I am Ovrik Stonebreaker, son of Urdin Stonebreaker and seventh in line to the throne of the Stonebreaker mountainhome. I was forged from the stone itself, born with an axe in hand. I have been compared to our heroes of old! And I'm trapped in a land of colorful ponies.
May the Gods of the Stone have mercy upon me.
Human tag is solely for the dwarf of the story. There is no dwarf tag, after all.
Image borrowed from silleras941 of DeviantArt.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I kinda like the idea of a dwarf in Equestria, keep it up.
*goes into ponder-mode for a few minutes*
Hrmmmm..... Is good, very good.
*slaps on a thumbs-up of approval*
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6549994
Glad you both like it
Any suggestions or concerns?
*Takes swig of ale*
this is good...
More of this!
I was just lamenting that the only other DiE fic (that I know of) hasn't updated since January, when this comes along.
Beards and ale for everyone!
You don't need a gore tag for combat unless it gets really descriptive. Since it's teen I don't see that happening. Personally I wouldn't use it but maybe you have more planned.
Great start! Needs indents. ^^
This dwarf has some serious balls going after a hell kite all by himself. I love it. Excellent work and excellent start Dwarvish.
I salute you with this vid.
* swings ale mug of ale*
aye, the dwarfish hero of equestria's songs be sung throughout the dwarvish holds, ah be lookin' forward ta were this be goin'
oi lass, brin be some more ale, why doncha.
I am liking this so far. What kind of armor is Ovrik wearing? If its leather...Twilight might have something to say about that
. I also wonder what else Ovrik came to Ponyville with. 'Normal' Adventuring gear? Any rations? Gold/Silver/Copper Coins? I can see Pinkie Pie being upset with Ovrik about destroying her cake.
If we are working with D&D...Ovrik is going off to solo what seems like an adult or young adult red dragon. That is pretty bad ass. I don't know about everyone else, but I would like to see a flash back of Ovrik's early adventures later on.
Need Moar!
keep going this looks good. tracking
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Good Idea. I should have Ovrik sing a song later.
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Ovrik would need to check his gear to know what made the trip with him. As for armor, I picture him in scale mail (metal, not dragon scales). Leather wouldn't quite be good enough when it comes to dragon claws.
Like it so far. Kinda short though. Also please don't make him like a certain Jaffa cake loving dwarf. There are only so many that the universe can take
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I honestly had to look this up to know what you were talking about. I don't think Ovrik will be like this, but I have no real knowledge of Yogscast.
6550694 Nothing that i can Think of, you've done a great job so far so keep Writing the way you feel is the best, it is your on fic after all.
A dwarf in Equestria? That's right up my alley. I shall be following this closely.
A bit of criticism though: sometimes, the characters' actions felt somewhat unnatural. For instance, Ovrik woke the dragon because he didn't want to attack a sleeping enemy, and that's fine; but when he saw Spike, he didn't hesitate even a fraction of a second before attacking a child. Spike doesn't even look anything like a full-grown western dragon does, nor like a "normal" baby western dragon for that matter.
And if he did jump into a rage and attack Spike, what exactly made him stop? He was still yelling bloody murder while hanging from his axe, and then Fluttershy suggested that he should apologise and suddenly, he was like "Oh ok, that's a good idea. Sorry for trying to kill you barely a second ago, now we're cool, k?" There just wasn't anything which could have cause Ovrik to "snap out" of his rage (if anything, being hoisted into the air by Twilight might have done it, but clearly it didn't since he kept yelling), nor did he calm down naturally - that would have involved some reasoning and a gradual acceptance, yet that didn't happen: one moment our dwarf is screaming bloody murder, the next he's apologising.
Oh and another thing: Ovrik got hit by the dragon's second attack, and when he woke up he was surprised to be alive. It's clear that if not for the free ticket to Equestria, the dragon would have killed Ovrik within 10 seconds of the start of the battle, and without much effort. This makes it seem like Ovrik was really stupid to wake the dragon up, and in fact the dwarves in general were really stupid to send what sounds like a prized warrior against a dragon... alone, ie to almost certain death (random world-porting notwithstanding). If you ever decide to re-write or touch up some of the story, I really feel like the prologue should be majorly changed to fix these plot holes.
Now, all of this may make it sound like I hate the story, but really it's more that I really like the premise, and Ovrik's character, so the problems I see with the plot and characterisation bother me more than usual. Slapping an ale-drinking, axe-waving, proud, mirthful yet battle-hardened and well-built dwarf in the middle of the magical land of ponies and friendship has the potential to lead to some amazing character interaction and culture clashes, but that potential can be entirely wasted if the characters and plot are poorly written. I'm not saying that you are writing poorly, just that there are a few problems I've already spotted and so I'm offering my two cents of constructive criticism to help ensure that you don't end up writing this story poorly, so to speak. Gah, that sounds really pretentious and condescending, sorry; I hope you get my point anyway.
...I didn't realise this comment had gotten so long. Sorry for the wall of text.
....no true dwarf drinks tea!
where is the drink of the dwarven gods?!
WHERE IS THE ALE?!?!
Introduce the concepts of necromancy and undead, maybe even a side hero or ally who is undead or a were-creature (other than Fluttershy if you decide to make the whole flutter-bat thing permanent.)
And if you ever read the Dragonlance book series {owned by Wizards of the Coast, which is owned by Hasbro the last time I checked} written by Laura and Tracy Hickman you could include a Kender, no pony has ever done that before.:pinkiehappy
FINALLY SOMETHING DECENT. I've been looking for another good fanfic to read but I haven't found any for the past two weeks, and all the other ones I like almost simultaneously stopped updating. Now they only update like once every 1 1/2 weeks instead of 2-3 times a week.
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I'm trying to be consistent with this story. I'm aiming for a chapter daily or every other day, depending on my schedule.
This is gettin' good. Hold on te yer' plots.
sweet, another DIE.
I've a question. Are these Dwarfs or Dorfs? If you get the reference I'll kiss ya.
Ovrik is one of the nicest, and least grumpy Dwarfs I have ever read
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Dwarfs. Dorfs tend to live shorter lives and have more !!FUN!!
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Ovrik tries his hardest to be such.
so over the top apology for being "rude" behavior.
I have a feeling Ovrik might have a hard time finding alcohol to wet his whistle. I can see Rarity having a field day making Ovrik clothes. Ovrik in a tux...Not a bad mental image. Can't wait to read about Ovrik's days in Ponyville.
I, Bromaeda the Battlescribe shall now write the song of Ovrick, the first lines are:
Oh, this is the tale of Ovrick, friend to ponies and dragons
Destroyer and maker of pastry of the gods
They call him 'diamond dog' he though he knows not, what goes on
Beings of this world shoot him looks that are odd
(more each chapter)
I wonder, have you ever played Dwarf Fortress? You can get into all kinds of crazy shenanigans in that. Like digging a pit to hell and demons over running everything you worked for.
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Yes, I have played Dwarf Fortress. I find it to be stressful and fun all at once. Though usually the area you referenced is called the "circus" to avoid spoilers.
Fun fact for DF fans: Koganusan is the dwarven name of the infamous Boatmurdered.
6555419 I'm not sure what has changed since I last played it, which was right as version 2 came out. But my most successful fortress ended when my dwarf started to refuse to fish and all slowly starved to death, it lasted around 7 years. What is yours.
Edit: 7 not 70, I am not nearly that good at the game.
Fu fu fu, ya know, I am half excepting Ovrik to dye his beard and hair bright orange, style his hair in a mohawk, toss aside his armor and seek a honorable death in battle against a overwhelimg foe for this "affront".^^
I'm just waiting for the hilarious scene where Ovrik meets Lyra....
Why? Because hands that's why!
I was looking for something a wee bit different. And I stumbled upon this jewel.
As an avid D&D gamer, I am dutifully, and happily, obligated to Favor this story so I may read more hilarity of dwarf/pony/dragon/draconequus/sockpuppet antics!
he flew with the aid of a blue unicorn
Though his 'generous' weight fizzled out her horn
6561177
I'm saving these.
6561194 the final product will be posted on your page at the the end of the story. Yor bagel God demands it.
This fic is amazing <3
If remember correctly cider season is coming up. I wouldn't be adverse to seeing a three way drinking contest between Pinkie, Applejack and Orvik.
The hard cider
Well we get to see him fighting monsters or dragons soon?
6561575
There will probably be a few chapters that are more of the adventure type later on. Right now Ovrik is adjusting to things and meeting more of the cast of the show. I've editted the story's tags to better reflect that.
Side note: Adventure and SoL tags are incompatible and the site won't let you have both.
6561609
Aww, really?
I've read published novels that'd fit Adventure/SoL, from when they used to just not let bad writing be published.
--If published authors can write Adventure/SoL, then you should be able to tag a story with both.--
Also, good story, believable Dwarf(I play D&D very(very) often), enjoyable everything. I know I see flaws in my drawings that nobody else sees, so I'm going to put in the obligatory, "It's fine to me." Followed by an actual line I said in an exchange, that's strangely relevant:
"Just because it's an adventure to you, doesn't make it an adventure to me. Maybe I do this every day." -Me, whilst playing my Elven character, and speaking down to a Dwarf in the adventuring party.
6561996
Reading that someone thinks Ovrik is a believable dwarf is my favorite positive criticism I've gotten about this story.
I play D&D (and other PnP games) about once a week. Funny enough, as much as dwarves are one of my favorite races, I've never played one.
Well, this is off to a good start so far...
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I personally like dragons, sadly playing as one isn't considered 'normal' by even Tabletop RPG standards... So I settle for the prudish, prissy, snotty, full-of-themselves noble-born Elven princes that think they're above literally everyone else, and aren't afraid to speak to the lesser races like they're children.
That particular snippet was when he managed to spot deer tracks at our first camp, and our resident Dwarven Mage was shocked, and pissed, and practically yelled, "If we were going to hunt for our food, why did we bring all this adventuring gear? I could've kept my pack a couple stones lighter, and saved at least a couple dozen gold, from not buying hardtack for the group! This is an adventure! Not some expedition for game!" After that, I knew Zephyr would have to say what he did. And so I made sure he did.
Dude! You just hit the most popular stories list right now!
The idea is simply a friggin' Goldmine! Gonna have to read it, I can't miss this one!
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It's been floating around the popular stories page a few times, I think. I grin like an idiot every time I see it.
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I see what you did there...
Not to mention the gold he was going to receive. That helped even more I fare say.^^
A Dwarf passed out from Hard Cider? I´m this close to calling Heresy but I am still laughing my ass of over the mental image of a young Ovrik, riding a giant rodent nude as the day he was born. XD XD XD