Norrath, Earth, Equestria. A Construct's Journey

by Nimnul

Trouble in Paradise

The following week, Landshark, having spent a night at Berry's house, was wandering the streets with the earth pony in tow. The construct had been invited to Twilight's place, and she supposed they'd learn who had won the bet they'd made in jest last week. It wouldn't hurt to ask about it, in any case.

Landshark assumed that Twilight thought of herself as close to the citizens, and willing to invite them over to social calls. The sheer size of her palace ruined the effect, she thought, wondering if ponies felt the same.

The summons had included Bon Bon for some reason, so they were on their way to the candy store first.

"So why're you tagging along? You weren't invited, were you?" Landshark idly lit a cigarette. She had since run out of the brand she had arrived with, but tobacco was not unknown in this world, although Landshark was forced to pre-roll cigarettes at home. She couldn't just lick and seal the papers in the field.

"Nah," Berry admitted. "I got some books to return, and Spike likes it when I keep him from his chores with a chat for a few minutes. Good kid, that. Twilight is too nice to tell me to stay out, anyway."

Berry seemed to have struck up a loose sort of friendship with the dragon, claiming that Spike had shown surprising empathy for the earth pony's struggle with addiction. "Few weeks ago, I was returning some of those AA-type books, y'know, and Twilight tries to strike up a conversation with me? This was pretty shortly after you gave me that shove in the right direction." Berry shook her head and cracked a grin. "Behind Twilight I see Spike and his eyes about rolled out of his head when Twilight was like 'Have you tried to just stop drinking?'" She snorted. "Woulda been a big hit at an AA meeting, I'll tell ya that. 'Twelve steps? How inefficient. Have you tried to just stop?'"

Landshark idly patted Berry on the withers, but stopped when a shiver went through the pony. She'd really need to work on remembering that her hands got uncomfortably cold. "Now, she can't help being born into privilege and being sheltered. Most errors can be reforged if the first intentions are pure and all that." She paused. "I suppose it's for the best I wasn't there to hear the comment, though."

"Still didn't get that excuse to punch an alicorn, huh?" Berry chuckled goodnaturedly. "Come here, lemme have a drag."

Landshark held the cigarette out for Berry. "Still waiting for a good reason, yeah. Since when do you smoke?"

Berry took a deep drag before answering. "Haven't smoked for real in years. S'not good when you're pregnant, and when you're budgeting for raising a foal and being an alcoholic, well, buying tobacco loses out anyway." She hesitated. "Hope I'm not cheapening your little memorial ritual there." The words might have been flippant, but the concern seemed real.

Landshark pinched the cigarette out again. "It's fine. We'll start giving you a hard time if you start buying your own smokes, though." She smiled, but continued more quietly. "It hasn't even been a year and already I sometimes catch myself having gone through a whole day without thinking of the old unit."

"Mhm. They wouldn't want you to worry, I don't have to be Bon to tell you that." Berry was quiet for several moments. "Plant a shrub or get some fancy lookin' stone and call it your memorial to your people, pour your drinks out on it." She shrugged. "You'll think of them when you see it."

"Huh, that might actually be a good idea!" Landshark nodded. "I'm surprised, Berry," she joked.

"Hey, I may be the muscle of this operation, but I got heart!"

"You're the muscle now?" It was Landshark's turn to chuckle. "Are you sure I'm not a bad influence? And what about Bon?"

"I think she prefers to think of herself as retired. Besides, you don't call in a pro just to rough a pony up or glower at them." Berry shrugged, sounding thoughtful. "She doesn't need any of that, I don't think."

"Well, I'll be sure to call you up in case I want to start running a protection racket. But even if I hadn't thought so before, I knew you're reliable after the changeling thing. No need to repeat ourselves."

"I'm being serious, Shark. You ever need to send a message to anypony, you just let me know." She grinned. "If it weren't for you I'd still be a mess. I'm through worrying what other ponies think. I got no fear left save for my filly and you and the other girls have done right by her."

Landshark shook her head and stopped. "What, now that you're sober it turns out that you're cheerfully sociopathic?" She used a tone of genuine curiosity. She wasn't aiming to be accusatory, seeing as she was not emotionally invested in being a law-abiding citizen. The local law more or less overlapped her own ideas of being a moral being, so adhering to it was an expedient that made life easier.

Berry stopped also and silently worked her jaw for a few long moments before answering. "Let's be honest for a moment, Shark." She paused again. "I'd rather compare myself to Ditzy. Sure, she's got her problems. But it's not her fault and she can deal. Me? I'm a drop-out and pickled my brain for the better part of my life. It's a miracle I can do math! And you know what, beating myself up over it just kept me miserable. Maybe soon I won't be much help with Pinchy's homework, if she even thinks to ask. Celestia knows the filly is well aware of what a screw-up I was, or she wouldn't have turned out so well."

The earth pony looked up at Landshark and smiled. "But I got a set of wonderful friends now who'll help Pinchy out if she needs anything I can't do for her. Well, the least I can do for you lot is take a hit for you. I'm an earth pony, I'm hard to shift. And maybe I'm not trained like Bon but I got my own sort of hoof smarts. I can fight." She sighed happily. "The day it finally clicked and I started believing that I'm good enough for my daughter and you girls, even if other ponies think I'm useless or a thug, everything changed."

"We need intellect," Landshark offered. "But if we can't have both character and intellect, I'll go with character every time."

Berry shrugged and started walking again. "I only care what my friends or my daughter think. You're all good sorts, as long as I'm with you I'm a pretty decent pony too, I figure. But if you need something dubious done, don't bother Bon with it, is what I'm saying. She paid her dues. Equestria can go hang, except it's a decent place for Pinchy to grow up. Princess Celestia's alright too. She's got the same hours in the day as anypony else, can't blame her for some parts of Equestria being crummier than others. Although I guess she gets to decide how many hours there are in everypony's day."

Landshark snapped her jaws once Berry appeared to have finished rambling. "You're free, Berry. No need to surrender your conscience to another's keeping. But we won't disappoint you." Landshark was privately unsure that Berry could so easily reject the judgements of society and only trust herself and a select view friends, but perhaps her past made 'us versus the world' thinking come to her naturally.

"Feels good. Hope I can keep it up." Berry chuckled. "Ditzy's got the better conscience anyway, we're probably in the clear if we listen to her."

"Too right. So if you're the muscle and Ditzy's the heart, what about the rest of us?"

"Well, Lyra's the versatile one whenever she remembers that her horn is good for more than magic fists." Berry made a thoughtful 'hmm'. "She used to go to that fancy school in Canterlot so she probably knows the best how to get something useful out of a library too." After another pause, she added, "Bon's the retired hardcase who sticks by teaching us the ropes unless the wheels really come off. She probably still has connections, too. You're the one in charge of our gear, of course. They ought to write books about us!"

"I think the others would prefer that we didn't have adventures worth writing about." Landshark crossed her arms. "I don't mind thinking of myself as retired either, I guess. I'm not a thrill-seeker. I'm just suited to a stressful lifestyle."

"Yeah yeah, I'm not looking for trouble either. Somepony could invent stories, though!" As they were nearing the candy store, Berry spoke up again. "Say, shouldn't you be at work?"

Landshark smiled at Berry. "Grey's at the desk in case someone wants to leave a message or order some ordinary thing. The other two get the morning off. And you better believe I'm billing Twilight for my time!"

Berry barked a short laugh. "Guess I made the right call in tagging along. I gotta see this."

The pair had reached Bon Bon's candy store and let themselves into the building through the back entrance, usually unlocked as long as Bon Bon wasn't alone at home. This time, it quickly became clear that Bon Bon and Lyra were both present.

"You FORGOT?" It was rare to hear Bon Bon raise her voice. "This is exactly why I don't like trusting you with the store, Lyra!"

"I didn't forget, I put it off! There's sugar here for days! What, are we stocking up for the apocalypse now?" Lyra sounded angry and hurt in equal measure.

Landshark and Berry Punch hadn't entered the kitchen yet. They exchanged awkward glances. Eventually Berry shrugged and quietly offered, "couples sometimes fight?"

"It's not like it spoils! I don't know why you have such a problem with me wanting to play it safe!"

"Bonny-"

"I haven't ever mismanaged this place and yet you don't even trust me enough to stick to a shopping list!"

"Bonny!"

"What?!"

Lyra's voice sounded carefully controlled now. "We're fighting again. We're keyed up. Let's each take ... take four deep breaths, then we can continue talking about this. Like we learned from that communications book. Please?"

In the following silence, Landshark decided to be intrusive and stand in the doorway to the kitchen to make her presence known, Berry following close behind.

Lyra and Bon Bon were facing each other, their stances speaking of combative attitudes. Lyra raised a hoof to signal the visitors to be silent. "Bonny, I'm sorry I put it off without telling you. But this isn't a life or death situation. I could literally go buy more sugar right now."

Bon Bon appeared to take several more deep breaths before loosening her stance and hanging her head. "You're right. I'm sorry for flying off the handle. There wasn't any reason to set my expectations so high. I'm not ... I'm not doing so good today."

Landshark understood, partially. Instructions carried out improperly, or new tasks not learned quickly and efficiently could result in real danger to a team, out in the field. Presumably secret agents were expected to perform their daily duties to exacting standards as well. That sort of training made a poor combination with a decreased ability to handle stress in humans, and apparently in ponies as well.

"Don't apologize," Lyra insisted. "I know you don't mean it when you get like that." She fumbled for words, then looked over to their guests. "It's like ... the automatic part of her brain gets cranky and before she realizes it doesn't make sense, something silly sets her off." She approached Bon Bon. "Bad dream again?"

"Yeah," the earth pony admitted. "The one with the roc. I told the flyers to stay grounded. I told them!" Bon Bon shivered.

"Okay." Lyra nodded. "But we're inside, and nopony has to die because I didn't listen properly. Okay?"

"Okay." Bon Bon swallowed and nodded as well. "Sorry you girls had to see that."

"No worries, Bon." Berry shook her head. "Won't think less of you."

Landshark crossed her arms and offered a small nod to Bon Bon, who knew well enough that the construct wouldn't judge her. "You're good at this, Lyra."

"And don't you forget it!" Lyra grinned again. "Bloody hard work, I'll tell you that much, but I'm nothing if not obsessively dedicated. I had no idea what was wrong with her so I fumbled my way through all sorts of couples communications advice and other such nonsense." Her expression softened. "There's nothing so rewarding as to work hard on work worth doing."

The construct recalled that Berry had just earlier theorized that Lyra might be comfortable trawling libraries for answers, perhaps she'd done just that in the past.

Bon Bon grumbled. "Woulda looked like a stalker to anypony else." She shook her head. "Well, I guess we better get going. Don't want to leave a princess waiting, right?"

"I think you should stay home and tend the shop, Bonny." Lyra sounded serious. "If you didn't sleep well there's no reason you should have to put up with Princess Twilight today. Let me handle her."

Bon Bon seemed to think this over. "Okay," She eventually conceded, morosely.

"Then it's settled. Now, get on the ground, Bonny." Lyra took a step closer to Bon Bon, invading her personal space.

"Aw, we got visitors, Lyra. It's embarrassing." Bon Bon averted her eyes.

"This is our house. No arguing. I can tell you're still feeling rotten. Anypony laughs, I'll cut 'em open from bow to stern like they ran aground on a jagged reef! Arr!" Her horn lit up and she briefly waved about a spectral cutlass.

Landshark was pretty certain neither she nor Berry would qualify as pirates or ... pirate ships?

Bon Bon didn't argue further and lowered herself to the ground. Lyra sat down in front of her. She gently wrapped a foreleg around Bon Bon's head and pressed the earth pony's cheek against her chest.

Landshark had seen mothers hug foals like that on occasion, although due to the size difference, the foal could normally remain standing or at least sitting.

"Listen to my heartbeat, Bonny," Lyra muttered. "We're connected. I'm calm, you can be calm. We're in this together. You can trust me." She used a soft telekinetic touch to brush the earth pony's back as she spoke.

They held the hug for nearly a minute before standing up and moving apart. Bon Bon immediately busied herself in the kitchen, appearing visibly relaxed, if slightly bashful, while Lyra shot Landshark and Berry a challenging glare that seemed fit to strip the scales off a dragon.

The construct just shrugged. Ponies needed contact on occasion, she wasn't going to make anything of it.

Berry looked back with an expression of increased respect, which seemed to visibly embarrass Lyra. "Watching you or Ditzy deal with the ponies you love is fit to make a mare feel like a real blunt instrument."

Landshark playfully punched Berry on the shoulder. "C'mon Berry, you're Pinchy's favorite blunt instrument. Still, can never hurt to say you love her." She snapped her jaws before continuing. "Now let's see what they want with us at the crystal palace, right?"

"Right on," Berry agreed with a grin. "I'm really looking forward to you presenting your bill. And of course the fillies will wanna know who won our bet."

Lyra glowered. "I should give her an earful about that flying goon of hers trespassing uninvited. What, because she's Rainbow Dash everypony has to be fine with her barging into homes?"

"Shark," Bon Bon interjected. "You're responsible for the team's unicorn. Bring her back in one piece. And make sure she doesn't get herself in trouble by saying something stupid, I guess."

"On my Oath, Bon." She sketched a sloppy salute, offered her usual smile and turned about to leave, Berry and Lyra in town. "You really gotta tell us sometime what's eating you about Twilight lately, Lyra. You didn't sound so irate when she came up in the past."

Lyra seemed to ignore that last statement as she turned to Bon Bon one last time. "And tonight we'll take a long walk and maybe drop off a bag of your caramel candies with Cranky and Matilda, that always cheers you up."

---

Trudging towards Twilight's palace, Landshark recalled Bon Bon's reaction to the unexpected appearance of Princess Luna. "Y'know, I don't think Dash is big enough to freak Bon out like a larger and more dangerous flying thing might?"

Lyra just snorted in annoyance before seeming to change the topic. "It wasn't always easy, you know?"

"I never thought it was, but go on." Landshark had been curious. Her understanding of relationship dynamics was poor, but she knew that problems like veterans sometimes had them could place a strain on relationships. Lyra had apparently begun her relationship with Bon Bon while the earth pony was at her worst.

"Well, back then I couldn't tell reliably how she was doing, so when she got more detached and wouldn't talk I'd ask if she was okay and she'd blow up at me about nagging and withdraw more. I didn't understand and it hurt."

Lyra sounded defiant as she continued. "I wasn't going to let her alienate me, so I got real careful, looking for cues that'd agitate her and make her snap at ponies for stupid stuff. But me walking on eggshells all the time even when Bonny was in a decent mood, well, it stressed her, because that's not natural either." She sighed. "And me worrying she'd snap at any moment just made us more distant than I wanted. It was alienating her."

"It's a wonder you stuck it out," Berry offered.

"Ugh, the fights we had. I'm no saint either. It took us a long time to get where we are." Lyra paused, then went on in a musing tone. "I think ... I think she was always convinced that I was the only pony stupid enough to put up with her. I'm not an idiot, you know? I wasn't always real pleasant to her either when we were fighting, I'm not a pony who just rolls over, but she never once said anything about breaking up. Not once. I once signed us up for a weekend communication class and it really helped us handle one another in constructive ways. Well, most of the time."

"Our relationship would look like such a mess to other ponies," Lyra added with another small sigh.

"Well, other ponies can just go hang, then. S'not their business if it makes you happy." Berry grinned.

"It's nice to have real connections again," Lyra admitted. "I don't gotta worry about having to explain Bonny to you lot. It's good for her too, hanging out with you, even if I still sometimes have to nag her into going."

---

The group was welcomed to Twilight's palace and led towards the library by Spike, who exchanged amicable trivialities with Berry along the way. In the library, they were met by Twilight and Trixie.

"Alright," Landshark started off without exchanging greetings. "So what's the story with Trixie? How'd you hear from Rainbow Dash?"

Twilight seemed to grow used to the construct's petty little discourtesies. She smiled at Lyra and Berry. "Good morning everypony!" She rolled her eyes at Landshark. "Rainbow Dash showed up at the castle that same night, quite worked up. She still barely believed I forgave Trixie." The princess hesitated. "I decided to sleep on the issue. It wasn't difficult to find out what she was doing in the region, so we started exchanging messages and I arranged for her to come here by train after she had secured her belongings in Canterlot."

Berry looked surprised. "Huh, she let you get all the way to Canterlot before summoning you back? I guess that's sensible. I hope she's footing the bill on those train tickets." She frowned. "Well, I guess at least that'll teach the fillies that the house always wins when you go an' gamble."

"Not sure the lesson has the right impact when they're the house that's winning, in our case," Lyra cautioned with an amused grin.

Landshark crossed her arms and shifted her weight. "We were betting on how Twilight would react to hearing about you, Trixie." She shrugged. "The fillies were handling the money. I guess now that none of us quite had it, they get to keep the bits."

Trixie offered a small amused smile. "Trixie is quite glad she was allowed to properly settle into her lodgings in Canterlot before being summoned back here as well. It's nice to see you again, at least."

"Yeah," Lyra agreed. "Feel free to drop by Bon Bon's candy store before leaving again. Your bits are just as good there as anypony else's." She looked over at Twilight. "So what's the point of us being here? Some of us have to work for a living."

Twilight tilted her head. "Shouldn't I be asking that? I invited Bon Bon and Landshark. Not that you aren't welcome to visit!"

Landshark had to admit that the princess did have a point. Neither Lyra nor Berry were required to be here. "Right," the construct threw in. "So why me? I'm not obligated to tell you about every eccentric customer I meet, so it better not be that."

"No, of course not, but after all, this all happened on your property, and besides, I doubt Bon Bon would have been willing to appear by herself. And according to Rainbow Dash, she made a very serious threat against somepony." Twilight looked at Trixie with concern. Trixie, in turn, had blanched.

Lyra appeared to try very hard to disintegrate the showmare with her stare alone, while Berry seemed to take a polite interest in Trixie's horn without saying anything.

"Trixie swears she didn't say anything of the sort! We had a perfectly agreeable evening before Rainbow Dash came along and started being very rude to everypony! Cross my heart and hope to die!"

"It's 'hope to fly' round these parts," Berry helpfully suggested.

Trixie nodded hurriedly. "That's good too. Cross my heart and hope to fly, Trixie didn't say a single bad word about any of you!"

"That's right," Twilight agreed, "but Rainbow Dash told me her version of events as well. Trixie, I know you want to make amends here in Ponyville, but being a doormat about these things isn't a good basis for friendship either."

"Hrrrm." Berry grumbled with flaring nostrils, the noise coming from deep in her chest. "Didn't anypony tell that filly 'bout the snitches and stitches?" She started unpacking the books she had meant to return while muttering to herself. "Ought to rip an ear offa her next time I catch up." She looked up. "I mean, I should give her an earful about this, yeah."

Landshark idly scratched at one of her eyes with a finger tip. "Well, if you have some kind of issue with one of my friends, it seems like a sort of poor idea to invite me along, Princess."

"Princess Twilight, there's no problem here!" Trixie was hard at work regaining her self-assured stage persona. "Trixie considers her conversation with Bon Bon to have been nothing more than a frank exchange of views. The mare in question at least made it clear that she was willing to trust Trixie, unlike Rainbow Dash."

Landshark credited Trixie for the attempt at smoothing things over.

"Besides," she continued, "Trixie thinks Bon Bon merely gave voice to a common unspoken social contract between ponies. 'You don't turn hostile and hurt ponies I love, I won't attempt to engineer your untimely demise.' Trixie thinks that's always an elephant in the room between two ponies that don't know each other well."

The construct wasn't convinced that this had been the right approach to take with the rather sheltered princess. For that matter, Landshark wasn't convinced most common ponies were willing or capable of engineering gruesome revenge when wronged.

Princess Twilight narrowed her eyes. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! Ponies don't just dance around each other trying to avoid provoking anypony else into murder!"

Lyra appeared to have been quietly seething, an eye occasionally twitching. She shook her head. "Trixie, I believe you. Thanks for not tossing Bonny in front of the train, there." She turned to glare at Twilight.

"Lyra, remember to take some deep breaths first, and think about what you want to say," Landshark cautioned. The construct was feeling agitated herself, but Bon Bon had asked her to keep Lyra out of trouble, so that had to take priority. Besides, if Lyra said something incautious that made Twilight angry, it would become even more difficult for Landshark to remain calm.

Lyra seemed ready to lash out at Landshark, but apparently thought better of it. She started taking deep breaths, as advised. Her glare slowly morphing into a painfully insincere version of her usual grin seemed to unsettle Twilight slightly. "Fine. Let's improve the atmosphere with a beneficial statement! The brain responds to constructive thoughts, you know." She nodded firmly. "I was happy to hear you reconnected with the Canterlot crew. Those were pretty good fillies."

Twilight cocked her head, seeming to remember something. "You drifted out of contact too, didn't you?"

"Yeah," Lyra agreed evenly. "Drifted is right. I dropped out, but I stayed in touch. Occasionally exchanged letters with Minuette. Sometimes they see me when I'm playing in Canterlot. But our lives just don't run parallel anymore." She narrowed her eyes. "At least I didn't just disappear from one day to the next and made a bunch of new best friends for life in the space of a day."

Twilight didn't quite flinch. "I wasn't very good at friendship back then," she admitted. "But that doesn't have to be a reason the two of us can't reconnect. We've lived in the same town for years, now!"

Lyra hesitated, then let out a slow breath. "I never wanted to reconnect." She shrugged. "Once I met her, I figured none of them were going to see what I was seeing in Bonny. I certainly didn't want to have to explain or make excuses for her quirks at the time."

That did go some ways towards explaining Lyra's lack of social life outside the mandatory Pinkie parties, Landshark supposed. She took a step forward to stand next to the unicorn.

Twilight's expression softened. "You shouldn't have to isolate yourself for one pony, Lyra. Friendship doesn't lessen when it's shared, you know."

"I didn't ... I wasn't ... fine." Lyra shook her head and briefly looked up to Landshark. "I made my choices. No regrets, Princess. I don't see how this is any of your business. I saw a pony hurting and I couldn't just leave her be."

Landshark nodded along on that last point, but it seemed better to let Lyra and the princess talk things out.

"You can't just define your life by your partner's difficulties and needs, Lyra, it's just not healthy. Don't subordinate your own needs to Bon Bon's."

Berry tilted her head. "Starting to skate on some pretty thin ice there, princess."

Lyra appeared uncomfortable with this line of argumentation, and gnashed her teeth. "You're neither a shrink nor a relationship counselor, Princess. Maybe I'm not a gifted unicorn, but I can navigate a library too. Are you seriously about to suggest there's a codependency issue at play here? You only took an interest in the first place because you think Bonny's dangerous." Her voice rose to a yell. "I saw the way you looked at her, that day in the hospital. She's done nothing to you!"

Although the topic was well over Landshark's head, Twilight looked like she might have planned to bring up something of the sort. She looked like she had been caught at something. The Princess seemed determined to forge on, however. "Lyra," she began patiently. "This isn't about me, it's about you. You dropped out of a very prestigious school, found a marefriend none of our friends ever got to meet, then moved away to Ponyville. And you didn't make new friends here until recently. How did you think that looked?"

Landshark saw Trixie roll her eyes despite the awkwardness of listening to the argument. Perhaps she didn't care much for the supposed prestige of Canterlot's schools.

"I maintained more contact than you did, and you know it. I'm not Moondancer, and even if I was, you'd be a day late and a bit short." Lyra stamped a hoof. "My parents love Bonny, business is good, I even occasionally get hired for my music. I've got a life! I don't place a low priority on my own needs in general and I don't rely on Bonny's poor functioning to satisfy my emotional needs!" She grinned without any humor. "Told you I can navigate a library too."

Truthfully, Landshark wasn't totally convinced that Lyra hadn't been placing a lesser priority on her own needs compared to those of Bon Bon, but Lyra's Self had always seemed reasonably healthy despite this.

To everyone's surprise, it was Trixie who cut in at that point. "Trixie thinks it is for the best that the Princess did not bring up that particular suspicion in an already emotionally charged situation." She raised her muzzle. "The Princess claimed that Trixie wishes to make amends in Ponyville, but the Humble and Apologetic Trixie would just as soon have stayed away for good if she had not been summoned back."

The showmare affected a haughty smirk. "But since Trixie is here now, she would prefer if the only ponies that dealt with her reasonably did not get in trouble for it. It would be a great pity if Rainbow Dash's accusation sabotaged the relationship between Trixie and her new acquaintances." She huffed. "Frankly, it is ridiculous that a mare who showed Trixie some degree of courtesy should now be under scrutiny based on the claims of a pony who made it very clear she neither likes nor trusts Trixie, and would have preferred that Trixie never grace Ponyville with her presence again!"

That seemed like an awfully manipulative way to phrase it to Landshark, and she didn't really expect it to be of much help, but the construct appreciated the sentiment – whether Trixie really wanted to be of assistance or just wanted to needle Twilight by being contrary, either explanation appealed to her in a petty sort of way.

"That's not helpful, Trixie," the princess chided, then sighed. "I'm not sure what to think about this. Bon Bon has never drawn attention to herself, but I never knew you as a reclusive sort of pony back in Canterlot, Lyra, so finding out about your lack, until recently, of real connections to anypony here left me concerned." She sought out eye contact with Landshark for a moment. "I won't judge her for her past or the way she handled herself fighting changelings, but you've got to admit ... "

Twilight trailed off. "I don't suppose you have a lot of context for courtship and relationships among mortals. I guess you wouldn't understand how it looks."

Landshark nodded curtly and answered with little inflection. "Little context for it except what I've observed from an outside perspective. Was not a concern during work, and I was advised to take depictions in entertainment media with a large grain of salt, as they say." She shrugged. "Lyra and Bon Bon seem very happy with one another."

The unicorn in question seemed deflated after the argument. "I've played the weird pony for so long, it's only natural that others think I might not make responsible choices in my relationships. And I can be pretty irresponsible, I guess." She looked at Trixie and her friends, avoiding eye contact with the princess.

"I love Bonny so much, but our relationship is a work in progress, and yes, we fight sometimes." Lyra chewed her lip. "But you know what? If she told me ... told me we had to split, that would be okay, too, eventually. I'm a grown mare, and so is she." She hesitated. "If she ever wanted to move on, I'd try, too. It's not fair to make another pony feel like they left wreckage in their wake."

"Never happen." Berry snorted. Her tone made it clear that she found the idea ridiculous. "Bon's just as cra ... she loves you just as much as you do her." She paused, working her jaw. "Maybe you look a little dysfunctional, from the outside looking in. But this is nonsense anyway. I threatened Trixie too, twice! I threatened to rip one of Dash's ears off! I robbed a liquor store, twice! When that last changeling surrendered I still broke his horn off. Compared to Bon I'm a terrible pony, but nopony takes dumb ol' Berry Punch seriously, so it's alright."

Trixie grimaced. "Trixie assures you she took you at your word at the time. But she is a worldly mare and recognized both your concern for your friends and your willingness to give Trixie a chance." She glanced at Twilight. "Unfortunately, some ponies from Canterlot are more sheltered than others and not used to dealing with ponies that are rough around the edges."

"Was good to have some cutting edges, growing up!" Berry snickered at her own wit.

"I'm sure you're not stupid, Berry," Twilight insisted. She seemed to ignore Trixie's comment for the time being, which Landshark had to admit was probably the mature response.

"I'm just uneducated." Berry smiled with evident good humor. "C'mon Twilight, long-term alcoholism doesn't turn ponies into scholars. You gotta take a realistic look at us ponies some day. Lyra didn't make the cut as a gifted unicorn? I didn't finish school. All I learned was fightin' dirty and cooking up drinks and I'm not real fit to learn anything else by this point." She tilted her head. "Look, it's not realistic, but I guess you gotta tell ponies that they can do anything if they just try. Well, why not say that about Bon and Lyra?"

Lyra shook her head. "Too late for that. Everypony made their positions clear. I'm taking a walk to clear my head." She turned about and strode off rather too hurriedly to appear calm and collected.

"Wait – " Twilight sighed as Lyra walked out. She used her magic to grab what seemed like a checklist from a nearby table. "Rekindle friendship with Lyra, no check." She crumpled up the parchment. "Too many items on here based on assuming success."

Landshark leaned against a bookshelf and crossed her arms. "She got pretty defensive, there." It was uncomfortable to make the concession. The construct continued in a musing tone. "Maybe she was the first pony to talk to me because she hoped I wouldn't know to blame her lack of friends on her romantic relationship? As a machine, I do have a blind spot there, I think."

"I knew the both of 'em, but I wasn't really in any position to judge. Or think much of anything." Berry shrugged. "If there was a friendship problem there, I'm not sure it still is. Lyra and Bon put a lot of work into their relationship."

"Mhm. You working on some kind of friendship backlog? The Canterlot people Lyra mentioned, calling Trixie back here, now being worried about how Lyra's living ..." Landshark trailed off, watching Twilight.

"I'm the Princess of Friendship! I should be able to handle this kind of thing properly!" Twilight hung her head briefly.

"Job's not botched yet," Berry claimed with a grin. "She'll calm down, I'll talk to both of them, and we can sort this out. I know you mean well and I guess I can sort of see what you meant, but let's tread lightly."

Twilight nodded, seeming slightly relived. "Thanks, Berry. That would mean a lot to me." After a moment, she added, "I was concerned about Bon Bon too, you know. Her well-being, I mean!"

"Hrrm. Maybe you should talk to Bon sometime as well. Just don't tell her she isn't stupid." Berry hesitated. "You know, or whatever else she'll say about herself. That's talkin' down to her and will just get you thrown out. She wants to deal, not be told that there's nothing to worry about." She looked at Landshark. "Whaddaya know, 'what would Ditzy do' is working! I'm a regular model citizen."

Landshark chuckled. "Well, I guess there's no point in staying around." The construct pulled out a folded up piece of paper. "Here's the bill, Princess."

"Very well." Twilight floated the document over to herself. "I don't really see what you're getting paid for today, but I suppose we are meeting during business hours. Cash, or do you just want it squared with your next loan payment?"

"At the end of the month is fine, I'll see that you get your receipt then." Landshark clapped her hands together. "I figure me not flying off the handle and making a scene about you sticking your nose into the affairs of my friends is service enough today, isn't it? Maybe I should make that a separate optional item on future bills."

"Fair enough." The princess rolled her eyes. "I appreciate you keeping a level head, though."

"Well, I did make sure to be well-rested today, makes it easier to seethe quietly. And I was more worried about Lyra flipping out. She gets protective." Landshark felt less self-assured than usual when it came to matters of the heart. And when she wasn't totally convinced she was in the right, it was easier to clamp down on her temper.

"That's it? I thought Twilight would be more surprised about being asked to pay you for showing up!" Berry seemed legitimately let down.

"Oh, I used to bill her all the time when she quizzed me on Norrath and the Underfoot, since I didn't have a real job back then. Sorry for getting your expectations up." Landshark smiled but didn't sound particularly sorry.

"Alas, life is full of disappointments," Berry mock-groused. "Well, guess I'm out of here too. Have a good one, Twilight."

Trixie looked thoughtful. "Perhaps Trixie could also charge the Princess for her time here?" She shook her head. "In any case, depending on how poorly today's meeting with Twilight's friends goes, Trixie may be in the mood for some more reasonable company tonight. Would it be too great an imposition to meet some of you?"

Landshark shrugged. "Well, I guess you're welcome to join us for a hand of cards at Berry's place, we won't mind a fourth since I think Bon and Lyra were planning a quiet evening together."

"S'right," Berry agreed, almost out of the room. "You're welcome to join. Strictly BYOB though, so keep that in mind if you want something harder than tea or coffee." She paused mid-step. "And don't you worry too much about Lyra, Princess. We'll get this sorted. Going to brainstorm with Ditzy tonight!"

Landshark supposed that Berry was in a good position to help out since the earth pony didn't appear to have any hang-ups about alicorns, wasn't defensive about the whole issue like Lyra was, and wasn't as resentful as Bon Bon sometimes seemed. Getting Ditzy's input was also just good sense.

Twilight didn't seem to appreciate Trixie's lack of enthusiasm for meeting her friends once more, but said nothing about it as Landshark shared Berry's address with the showmare and left. "I'll try not to worry about it, Berry."

Author's Note:

I always feel really self-conscious about writing any sort of conflict. I am really trying to make Twilight's concern seem reasonable from her point of view, and social isolation can be an issue for spouses of veterans for a variety of reasons

Comments

[Fireeaters]

I wonder how the trixie thing will play out with Twilight's cohorts.

[Greatazuredragon]

Very nice chapter, good work.

[wlam]

Berry seemed to have struck up a loose sort of friendship with the dragon, claiming that Spike had shown surprising empathy for the earth pony's struggle with addiction.

I really like this little touch. It really makes just perfect sense for him be able to sympathize with that very strongly, given how the whole greed thing affects dragons (and him personally.) It's really not very different from an addiction, except for shiny things instead of a substance. A hoarder instead of a narcotics abuser, but the same kind of compulsion.