Norrath, Earth, Equestria. A Construct's Journey

by Nimnul

Not Her Fault, This Time

Landshark and her friends were spending the night at a cheap bar in a poorer part of town. They'd planned a night out together for a few days now. Pinchy and Dinky were having a sleep-over with the Cutie Mark Crusaders at Sweet Apple Acres, so for once Landshark was actually participating instead of watching over Berry's daughter. It was Berry, in fact, who had suggested the Watering Trough, as she argued that it was enough of a dive that the respectable town gossipers wouldn't see them here, and the proprietor, Mr. Draft (Berry couldn't recall his full name) had seemed supportive when Berry told him during a chance meeting that she was trying to kick the habit, as it were.

So now, Landshark's little circle of friends were seated in a booth near the corner of the bar, enjoying non-alcoholic beverages and sharing stories. Ditzy, Lyra, Bon Bon and Berry Punch. Landshark supposed that her friendship with Bon Bon was still mostly based on the fact that Bon Bon seemed to genuinely appreciate anyone who was willing to strike up a completely ordinary friendship with her eccentric marefriend. Bon Bon had a stable job related to her cutie mark, a loving mare, and the confidence to dismiss anyone who questioned her choice of life-partner. In short, it seemed that she needed neither help nor emotional support from Landshark. Nevertheless, Bon Bon was a moodier pony than most, and Landshark couldn't help being curious about her.

That wasn't the focus tonight, however. Landshark was talking to Berry, who appeared to be having a pretty good night. "You ever consider taking a break from all that microbrewery stuff you're running, Berry? I know you've been steady, but I could use another set of hooves at the smithy. Or, you know, a jaw? Hard work, keeps you from dwelling on things. Good company too. Probably improve your average mood."

Berry nodded slowly, sipping her non-alcoholic cider. "Yeah ... if the pay is alright, I'll think on it. It's been rough," she admitted. "But well, we still need to eat. I haven't been accepting new orders for the hard stuff, but I gotta do the ones I have before I can try ... fruit juice, I guess." Berry shrugged with clear lack of enthusiasm.

"Sounds like a good idea," Ditzy nodded sagely. "You don't need to make a living off your mark, you know. You can just take any paying job and maybe raise some fruit in your yard for yourself and Pinchy. Dinky would be awfully bummed too if she couldn't get any of that berry juice anymore. Goes well with baked goods too!"

Some ponies might have wondered at the budding friendship between the mailmare and the construct. Landshark knew she tended to be verbose, and not because she did not need to stop and breathe. Ditzy had little to no use for long-winded lectures. It seemed to be enough that Landshark would never make fun of the mare's eye, or the way she struggled, sometimes, to line up her words right. When calm and in a comfortable situation, such as now, Ditzy spoke with a slow, measured rhythm, pausing occasionally to line up the next sentence, it seemed. When nervous or otherwise agitated, she tended to struggle. Landshark had no understanding of the condition, but she could be as patient as necessary, and their other friends followed that example.

"Baked goods, hm? We're all friends here, you can stop pretending like you do anything but muffins." Lyra nudged Ditzy in the ribs and grinned. "They're great, no worries."

Ditzy stuck out her tongue. "They're very versatile. And Trottingham style muffin is basically an entirely different thing, so that has to count as two."

Landshark had been nodding along while shuffling a deck of cards. She'd been excessively thorough as well, just because it had amused her and Bon-Bon to see Lyra's fascination with the process. "Well, just drop by and we'll talk. Now, who's up for a game? They used to make me play Mau-Mau, which is a shedding game, once people got tired of my poker face." She paused. "Simple enough game, ponies probably invented it under a different name."

That was when Landshark noticed Bon-Bon look up and narrow her eyes. Turning her own head, she noted a noisy group of barflies stagger into the establishment. Three earth ponies, two pegasi and a unicorn. They clearly all had had a few drinks, but they didn't appear too drunk to Landshark. She was about to start explaining the rules of the game when she heard someone call over to them.

"'Ey Berry! Where you been, girl?" Berry appeared to try and sink into her seat. "You gonna be taking another crack at the Cider Trough challenge? You almost had it last time!"

The group of strangers wandered over to their table. Landshark was pretty sure that a literal trough of cider would kill a human, but ponies did have a little more body mass, and earth ponies were special, so she supposed anything was possible. Nearly a decade of hanging out with humans did leave the construct woefully unprepared to judge equine alcohol consumption. She wondered how they compared to dwarves. Since many of the short humanoids enjoyed their afterlife in the Underfoot, there was usually plenty to drink to be found.

Berry hid her face in embarrassment, but responded with a clear, "No. I'm not doing that again."

Landshark noticed that Bon Bon remained tense. The mare took a long drink while sizing up the half-dozen drunk ponies. Landshark thought they seemed younger than her own friends. Adults, yes, but only just. Lyra and Ditzy appeared nervous. Perhaps they feared trouble, or just weren't comfortable around rowdy young adults.

The apparent leader of the barflies, an earth pony stallion with a steel grey coat and darker mane placed a forehoof onto their table. "It's cool, Berry, we're all gonna chip in. No need to worry about your budget, eh?"

"It's not the money, Hammer. I'm quitting." She nodded. "Just having a quiet night with some friends."

Berry had barely been able to briefly make eye contact, Ditzy and Lyra were too nervous, but Landshark was sure that Hammer's little circle of friends had displayed a range of expressions from surprised disbelief to mockery and disdain. She hadn't seen any sympathy or even indifference. Some of them were nudging one another, looking amused. She noticed Bon Bon tighten the grip on her mug. The construct had been taught that people in recovery from addiction needed support and should be celebrated. She was becoming somewhat annoyed.

Landshark made eye contact with Bon Bon and moved her jaw in small snapping motions without actually closing them noisily. I didn't mean anything, and Landshark wished anyone would understand her old unit's hand signs. Still, Landshark seemed to have been able to communicate that she understood that Bon Bon was ready for trouble. The mare nodded after a momentary pause, then started shifting in her seat, working muscle groups with a minimum of actual movement. Landshark was impressed and curious. She hoped that Bon Bon was worrying for nothing.

The stallion Berry had called Hammer sounded almost condescending now. "Ah, Berry, you're just going through a phase." Landshark began to suspect that Berry had tried to quit drinking before.

"It's not a real Ponyville party without you to liven it up, dontcha know. I mean, adding some spice to Pinkie Pie's parties is practically your patriotic duty. She is the Element of Laughter, you know."

There was general smirking agreement. Berry tensed up. Her hooves trembled. Landshark turned her head to address the lot of them. "Let's be reasonable. Berry made her call. Time to go our separate ways."

Berry shook her head. "It's okay, Shark, I got this." She looked up to address the standing ponies again. "Hammer. I'm doing this for my daughter. For my daughter! So if you can't show some support, then piss off or I swear I'll force-feed you this mug."

That hadn't been the de-escalation Landshark had been hoping for. She'd thought that Berry's tremors had been withdrawal symptoms. Now Landshark assumed that Berry had worked up some real anger, perhaps from the thought that these ponies expected her to perform for their amusement while she tried to be strong for her daughter. Landshark was in the habit of speaking in terms of duty about obligations to family and friends. Framing Berry's drunken escapades in those terms had likely been an unintended mistake by the stallion.

Hammer sneered. "I'd like to see you try, Berry. You think your collection of freaks and cast-offs is going to help you? Everyone's seen how fragile the golem is, Walleye here can't even fly in a straight line and Lyra?" Landshark assumed he was about to say something about Lyra in that same tone of sneering contempt when he noticed Bon Bon looking at him with no more expression than the muzzle of a gun had. "Well anyway. Everyone here knows you'll be back, Berry. We know it, they know it. No need to fight about it."

Landshark didn't know why these ponies felt the need to be deliberately hurtful, but they'd not only managed to upset Berry further, Lyra and Ditzy also seemed to take issue with the suggestion that they didn't have faith in their friend.

Berry growled and before anyone could react, she had smashed her mug over Hammer's head. Between two earth ponies, the mug was the definite loser. Berry followed up by practically leaping from her seat to tackle Hammer to the ground. Landshark was impressed. She'd known earth ponies were strong, but she hadn't ever really thought of the seemingly vulnerable Berry Punch that way.

Unfortunately, Berry was now in a fight with a pony, surrounded by five of his friends, who seemed to be ready to make it a one-sided affair indeed, even though some of them were still getting over their surprise.

Landshark had been in a considerable number of similar brawls involving humans. She'd generally gotten used to focusing on taking hits for her friends and showboating with her enormous resilience. Since she didn't feel pain, it hadn't seemed real fair to play for keeps. She had thrown her fair share of punches, of course, but she'd generally preferred to make a show of bar fights.

She decided she'd have to take this more seriously. "Bon, table!" As she and Bon Bon sat closest to the wall, the mare caught on immediately. Together, they lifted up their end of the heavy wooden table, sending their beverages clattering and splashing to the floor. Ditzy grabbed onto Lyra and got the two of them out of the way and onto the far side of the fight with quick flaps. Landshark and Bon Bon, having stood the table on its narrow end, prepared to tip it over towards the other ponies. They weren't going to hit anything at the speed they were setting it up, but at least it kept their opponents from getting their own kicks in on Berry.

If anyone else in the bar hadn't noticed the fight yet, the resounding crash of the table landing top down on the floor changed that. Ditzy took off to circle around close to the ceiling and occasionally distract someone with a quick kick. Landshark judged that she lacked experience and hadn't the stomach to accidentally hit someone a little too hard. By some miracle, she was dodging ceiling lamps and objects thrown by the single opposing unicorn with great success.

It seemed like the situation wasn't in absolutely immediate danger of falling apart. Berry was still rolling around on the ground, trading blows with Hammer. Neither of them was in position to put real leverage into their swings. Ditzy was keeping the unicorn busy and occasionally distracted the others. Bon Bon was standing in the empty space where their table had been, fending off both an earth pony and a pegasus with surprising ease. Landshark would definitely have to ask her about that.

Lyra had magically scooped their empty mugs off the floor and was chucking them at the third earth pony while dodging her clumsy attacks. Landshark locked eyes with the second pegasus at the same time as he noticed that she was the last unoccupied target. The pegasus took off and decided on an aerial charge.

The impact of hooves to her skull staggered Landshark, purely from the kinetic force involved. She felt her outer skin crack. On the second pass, she managed to grab the pegasus by the fetlocks. Maybe he wasn't used to vertically oriented targets. Landshark felt real concern about possibly dislocating her shoulder joints, but managed to redirect the surprised pegasus towards crashing into the earth pony chasing Lyra. That pegasus momentarily dazed, she turned her attention to the earth pony.

Said earth pony apparently had decided to charge Landshark. Everyone knew bipeds were slower targets. The construct braced her back to a neighboring table. "Lyra! Flip'er up!" Landshark stepped forward to receive the charge, grabbing the surprised pony around the neck. "LYRA!"

She saw the golden glow of Lyra's magic. The earth pony's legs were losing contact with the ground. Landshark adjusted her grip, manipulated the flailing pony into a nearly vertical position and allowed herself fall backwards, pulling the pony along. Lyra appeared to understand, releasing her magic hold at the right time to allow their opponent to smash through the table in perhaps the most contrived suplex in Equestrian sports-entertainment history.

Landshark briefly wondered how a no-DQ wrestling match would look once you involved telekinetic magic. She felt compelled to revise her earlier feelings regarding the contrivance of the move. When both parties cooperated for a pre-planned fight, much greater levels of contrivance had to be possible, she thought. She seemed to have some difficulty keeping her head in the game. She had never taken such brawls very seriously.

Landshark also wondered if she should start resenting earth ponies for their durability. Before she had even extracted herself from the wreckage of the table, she received a kick to her upper arm that definitely damaged her shoulder joint in some way. Her left arm was a lot less useful when it was just dangling off her torso, although she could still move her fingers and elbow.

Standing back up with more trouble than she would have liked, she noted that the pegasus she had brought down earlier seemed to have had his fill of fighting. She prepared to continue dealing with the stubborn earth pony mare when Ditzy suddenly crashed into said pony and brought them both back to the ground. To the mailmare's credit, she was actually getting up first and began distracting the earth pony with wing flapping and evasive maneuvers.

Lyra appeared to have formed a great big magic hand with which to grab a chair. She was putting real pressure on the unicorn that had presumably managed to shoot down Ditzy. Landshark didn't think manifesting a hand over regular telekinesis brought any advantage. It was very Lyra, though.

Landshark performed a quick sprint to peek out the front door. She saw guards approaching down the street. Turning her attention back to the bar, she called out, loudly. "Authorities on the way! Everyone, disengage and withdraw ASAP."

It seemed that no one had been really badly hurt, which was likely for the best in the long run. Ponies really were quite damnably durable. Berry's extended punchout with Hammer seemed to be going to her disadvantage though. "Alright, everyone. Back door. Lyra, grab Berry. Mr. Draft, We'll pay damages! Pinkie Promise!"

As Lyra yanked Berry away from her fight, Bon Bon and Ditzy appeared ready to cover everyone's retreat. The imminent appearance of guards seemed to have taken the fight out of most of Hammer's friends. Still, Hammer himself seemed to be ready to have a go at Lyra for taking away his target. Landshark quickly charged to intervene. She hooked her good arm so swiftly at the earth pony that it was nearly imperceptible, the blow measurable only by its aftermath. She was pretty sure she'd just barely avoided damaging her wrist and fingers. She wouldn't be able to throw another punch like that. At least Hammer seemed dazed by the blow to his head.

Landshark laughed. It seemed entirely ridiculous that she was suddenly the fragile one in her group of friends. But without feeling actual pain, she wasn't easily stopped. "Hammer!" She followed up her strike with a headbutt. "Please remain stationary - " She smashed her skull into his again, to the protest of her neck. "- for maximum damage saturation." She repeated the maneuver. The clay covering was starting to splinter off her reinforced cranium. She was tempted to keep going until her neck gave out, but that would have been a bit too macabre. After that third one she allowed Hammer to stagger away and motioned for her friends to escape. Whether she'd just finished beating the fight out of him or had just freaked him out hardly mattered now.

The five friends successfully evaded the cops, staggering home through back alleys and sneaking through abandoned lots. "You earth ponies are crazy tough, I can't believe it." Landshark shook her head with a squeal of her neck.

"Hammer's always had a thick skull," Berry commented. "If you'd nailed me in the head like that, I'd probably be nursin' a concussion or something. Earth pony tough only goes so far, for most of us."

Bon Bon smirked. "Well, maybe that's so, but I saw Ditzy's crash and she took that like a champ. Look at her! Barely a scratch."

Ditzy giggled, then winced. "Well, you crash often enough, you ... you learn to crash well, you know?" She lifted off the ground experimentally for a few flaps. "Very glad I won't have to take a sick day tomorrow."

Berry wasn't particularly amused. "I'm sorry I lost my temper and ruined the evening, girls. I just....I got so angry. They made fun of you, and...they just want me to be their clown. Patriotic duty my achin' flank." She snorted. "I only got the one duty and that's shapin' up for Pinchy. And now look at us! Shark, you look like someone tried to feed you into a wood-chipper, and it's all my fault."

It was technically true. After getting kicked in the head first and then repeatedly slamming her forehead into an earth pony skull, much of the upper half of Landshark's face started splintered off her metal cranium. She was lucky her eyes remained intact.

Landshark bumped into Berry playfully. "Don't apologize. They were pretty much asking for it. I've never felt more at home than tonight! Me and the old section would get into dumb fights with other units all the time between deployments. They didn't hit as hard, though. No hooves."

"Well, I'm glad you had fun, Shark." Ditzy sounded completely genuine. "They were asking for it. They should be ready for consequences. Let's ... not make this a regular thing. I'm tough. But I don't want to go to the hospital. Dinky would be so upset." She smiled, thinking of her daughter. "She does hate it when ... when people call me names, though. She might approve of tonight, then scold me for not using my words. But Bon Bon, I'm impressed, you took on two of those jerks and you ... you look barely any worse than me."

"Eh," Bon Bon evaded lamely. "They weren't very coordinated."

Landshark made eye contact with Bon Bon before speaking up. She had seen that Bon Bon hadn't just been lucky with incompetent opponents. "By the way, Lyra. Excellent assist back there. I've got literally no training in unarmed combat against equines so that was a big help."

"That was so sweet! She didn't know what hit her." Lyra was grinning her semi-psychotic grin again. "Uh, sorry about your arm, though."

Landshark generated a chuckle. "I guess she didn't know anything hit her! Earth ponies, I swear. I feel worse for the table than her. But we make a great team." Landshark held up her functional right arm (although she had doubts about her wrist), her hand deliberately out of Lyra's normal reach. "C'mon, gimme some skin. Up high!"

Lyra called up a smaller version of her telekinetic hand projection to slap palms with Landshark. "Like that?"

"Alright, down low!" Landshark held out her hand again, but pulled away at the last moment. "Aw, too slow." They shared a laugh as Lyra started maneuvering her disembodied hand to catch up with Landshark's palm to complete the gesture. "I need to make you a plate gauntlet or something. Something with internal locks you can click into place to maintain a grip without expending further magic."

Bon Bon shook her head at Lyra's evident excitement for the idea. "Do you have to encourage her, Shark?" She was smiling, though. "You really could use some pointers in dealing with ponies, but since you're so recognizable, the guard might pay you a visit about tonight, and then it'll be better to look like you got put through the mangler."

The mood seemed to sink after that remark, but Landshark shrugged. "I'll deal with that when it comes up. I kinda promised we'd pay for the damages to the bar though. I can front it from the loan I took out, but I'd appreciate it if you could chip in a little. I am trying to get a business off the ground, you know?"

There was general agreement, although Ditzy seemed downcast. Landshark slapped her on the back. "Don't worry, Ditzy. You didn't even break anything, and we know money's tight." After a moment's additional thought, she added, "well, pay for your drink, hm? It's what you owe, no more, no less." Although the few bits for the drink seemed petty, some ponies preferred to take as few freebies as they could. It was better for their confidence.

Ditzy seemed agreeable to the idea. "Thanks. You guys are the best."

Landshark nodded. The movement wasn't as smooth as usual. "I feel very lucky to have gotten to know you guys. Really. And hey Berry, check this out. I told you I'd get a bit upset if anyone made you feel crummy about your issue, and I really hammered the point home, eh? Eh?"

After a collective groan, Bon Bon added "You look like someone took a hammer to your forehead, Shark. I mean, seriously. You're liable to frighten someone to death. I suggest wearing a paper bag over your head or something."

"Oh, I'll just get some modeling clay, let the kids put on a coat of that until it looks less gruesome. They'll love that. Give it a couple days and I'll be good as new. I heal too, you know. It's magic! The joints may take longer though. I'll need a sling and maybe some kind of wrist brace. My joints being such a weakness is a bit of an inconvenience."

"Well," Lyra began to reason, "Psychologically it might help ponies feel save and be accepting, knowing they can just kick the legs out from under you, even if they can't really hurt you permanently."

"You girls know I'm not literally indestructible, right? I like abusing my construction, but if everyone talks me up as unstoppable, someone's going to take a page out of Celestia's book and, without a means to get me to the moon, bury me in a basement or stuff me into a weighted sack and toss me into a lake." She made sure to sound amused, but she wouldn't deny having worried about it.

"Well, I guess we'll know where to look if you ever disappear. Maybe Lyra or some other unicorn could use magic to track you down. We have your teeth, after all." Berry didn't sound as though she gave the 'buried alive' scenario much credit, but she was game for the conversation. "Or if those go magically inert, we could ask Princess Twilight for some magic token she could track, crack open your chest and hide it in your rib-cage."

"Gee," Landshark laughed, "I can really tell you have my best interests in mind. But hey, putting a magic tracking chip on me would be a really easy sell to the alicorns anyway, heh." She tapped on her limp arm with her right hand. "For serious though, the idea isn't completely crazy. I got most of myself reinforced with metal for my old job." She didn't feel like explaining how she had become weaker and more fragile away from the divine realm of the Underfoot. "I mean, it doesn't hurt and it doesn't change the way I look so my self-image doesn't reject it when I'm healing. That's basically the only reason I haven't had my limps snapped yet, or my skull caved all the way in."

"Makes you think, doesn't it? Can a golem be a cyborg?" Everyone stared at Lyra. "Okay, maybe it just makes me think, sheesh."

Landshark created a low chuckle before answering in monotone. "I'm a cybernetic construct. Magic clay over metal endoskeleton." She shook her head, now sounding a tad wistful. "Now there was a movie that spoke to me. And a fine piece of entertainment too."

Amid casual conversation and a quick plot summary of Judgement Day, everyone eventually headed to their own (or shared) home. Without a formal residence, and because it seemed to give Berry some stability, Landshark had been staying at her house. Pinchy certainly hadn't minded so far, although the construct was glad she wouldn't have to walk the filly to school the next day, busted up as she looked.

Before going to bed herself, Berry cleaned herself up and applied bandages as best she could with Landshark's help, then prepared a rudimentary sling for her guest's arm. The construct obviously wasn't in any pain, but the loosely dangling limb was uncomfortable to look at, and Landshark thought keeping it still might help the joint mend itself. "How were you doing tonight, Shark? You mentioned having your own problems."

"I was upset and annoyed at those immature jerks for hassling you." Landshark shrugged with her good arm. "I know that might sound detached, but I just don't get that angry about this kind of thing. If one of you had gotten hurt, well, I might have bitten someone or tried to break some legs to make a point about messing with my friends, but I would get over it. I'd certainly not flip my lid and plan some sort of psychopathic revenge. I mean, we did kind of start it."

"Well, I did." Berry grumbled. "And I'm really sorry about that...but...you all jumped in to back me up without even thinking about it. That feels incredible to know. But seriously, telling me you wouldn't get angry, but would still try to break legs to make a point? That's not how you convince people that you aren't crazy."

"That wasn't the ideal reaction from you," Landshark agreed, passing over the rest of Berry's remark. "But it wasn't fair for them to hassle you, either. Berry, I'm a soldier. My first instinct is always to back up my comrades first, screw the haters, gods and mortals alike." She paused. "I don't know what Bon's story is, but she was expecting the worst and getting ready for it. I was kind of incidentally friends with her via Lyra, but that mare impressed me tonight. And so did you! You really laid into that Hammer guy."

Berry shrugged, looking embarrassed. "They don't call me Berry Punch for nothin' Or didn't, anyway. I'm out of shape. I was losing when Lyra pulled me out. But I really think I'm gonna have to take you up on that job offer. Nothing like some hard physical labor to spice up that Punch."

Landshark clapped Berry on her back. "Here's to Self-improvement. You're going to work on those muscles, I'll try to get some pointers on grappling ponies almost twice my mass. I might have to pre-emptively dock your pay for that awful pun, though."

Berry Punch deadpanned. "I deserve a raise for not calling you out on 'hammering the point home'. Goodnight Shark. And don't worry too much about the cops. Wasn't the part of town where people are happy to talk to them, fight or no fight."

"Fair enough. Sleep tight, Berry."

Comments

[Greatazuredragon]

Lyra appeared to have formed a great big magic hand with which to grab a chair. She was putting real pressure on the unicorn that had presumably managed to shoot down Ditzy. Landshark didn't think manifesting a hand over regular telekinesis brought any advantage. It was very Lyra, though.

Indeed.

"Makes you think, doesn't it? Can a golem be a cyborg?" Everyone stared at Lyra. "Okay, maybe it just makes me think, sheesh."

.. now I'm imagining it...
Good work.

[wlam]

It seemed that no one had been really badly hurt, which was likely for the best in the long run. Ponies really were quite damnably durable.

They really are. It's honestly kind of a bit much, really. The ponies seem altogether a bit overpowered just so Shark will remain ineffectual in a physical sense, despite her superior physique over a human of equivalent build.