• Member Since 14th Apr, 2013
  • offline last seen Jul 21st, 2020


Honestly I don't even know why I'm here.


One year ago you were thrown into a strange new world, equipped with only your underwear and enough wit to get you to safety. Your memory was scrambled, fragments of your old life whirling in the pool of your brain, though they never stayed long enough.

Now, you have found a new life, among the people of your new world. One which you are quite content with, where you are loved and safe. Your old life is dead, and with it, the old you. Many things die, but lots can be born from said death. Is the exchange worth it?

Big thanks to Vallis for proofreading the story!

If you enjoy this story let me know in the comments, or if you have any tips on how I could improve it then feel free to do so. Leave a like too, helps me see the progress!

*Edit. AAAHHHH IT GOT FEATURED! Holy shit I feel like giddy like a bloody schoolgirl :pinkiehappy:. WOOHH First story to get featured and it's the one I'm most proud of. Thanks so much for everyone who's supported this story, and there's much more to come.

Chapters (8)
Comments ( 103 )

Nice concept. Can't wait to see where this goes.

Interesting concept; however, I would probably appreciate it more if it weren't in second person.

6547049 That's... interesting. Not to say people cant have personal preference, but the whole point of 2nd person is to engage the reader, make them feel a part of the story. Unfortunately I'm not really planning on changing the perspective, but I appreciate the feedback.

6547070 That's the idea yes. Though in my opinion 2nd person only really works in video games (mainly rpgs) or interactive stories (choose your own adventures). When I read a book I use it as a way to escape from my reality and put myself in someone else's. But like you said don't change the entire story because I said I didn't like the perspective, I'm just one person so don't take it seriously.


I guess the question is whether the author is trying to literally put the audience in the action or whether they are trying to get the audience to sympathize with a separate character.

While it is... difficult for a 2nd person character to both properly reflect the audience and be a fully formed character, I think it works unusually well for HIE, since the genre's default is wish-fulfillment.

6547522 6547070

That is true I guess in some regards, the genre was originally built for wish fulfillment. I guess my issue though with it now is that I've grown use to the idea of characters being "trapped" rather then having their dreams of loving with ponies be fulfilled to be more interesting.

Which is why this stories description caught my attention I saw it possibly being a man (or women since its second person) was accidentally (or purposefully) transported to Equestria. Along the way his memories were destroyed, save for a selected few, and he now lives a "regular" life in Equestria. However, over time old, shattered memories of years past begin to resurface and he slowly beings to learn more and more about his old self. Which would then lead to him learning that he possibly had a family, kids, etc. And now they're all gone, thus, driving him into some kind of depression or determination to find a way back to his old life.

Author I hope you're taking notes because this is some interesting stuff you could probably use if not you're using them already.

Kind of rambled a bit, but that's the kind of HiE I like. But again I'm just one person and I do like the story's concept so I won't knock it.

I'm liking where this story is going, keep up the good work:twilightsmile:

Comment posted by ShiningLuck deleted Oct 20th, 2015

6547575 Ssshhhh just let the story continue. I have most of it planned out and lots of stuff happens.

6550398 Oh God don't tell me I called the whole story! :pinkiegasp: :raritydespair:

6550402 Ssshhh you haven't ruined anything. You shall be awaited in Valhalla, and this story will continue to NOT be spoiled. All is good.

Good story, your introduction worked well. Now you have to introduce the overarching plot.

6547828 Thanks man I really appreciate this. Comments like these are what keeps the stories going, and I hope you enjoy the development of it. Stay around. :pinkiehappy:

I'm not fully sure what to say about this story yet accept to say that I am intrigued. I wanna see where this goes.

I love this story so far. Introduction was perfect. Just promise me this won't end up like pretty much half of the stories on Fimfiction. Only half finished and never updated.

This was an interesting read. A great set up with the characters, I adore Lyra and Bon Bon and their chemistry was quite spot on. Not over the top, nor drab.

I am curious, where are you going with this?

Is he the chosen one?

Is he the "stallion" in their herd?

Are Lyra and Bonny gonna try to set him up on a date, despite his reservations?

Must know more! So YOU! Write more!

6571902 Next chapter's on it's way, though I may do a quick 2 chapters released at the same time. I feel like it may prevent any speculations and shit. We'll see. Thanks for the feedback!

6554198 I've only just realised I haven't actually responded to your comment, so here it is. I have no intention of dropping this story, but then again I doubt anyone expects to give up on their own writing. I assure you however, that although there may be periods where chapters come out slower than ever, I will see this adventure through and hopefully provide everyone with an enjoyable experience. Thank you very much for the feedback, and I hope that I can continue to impress you and meet your standards as this story develops. Next chapter's at 4,700 words, and should be out soon.

This is a nice story, i like it. You should add the 2nd person tag to it though.

Why do I have a bad feeling about when Lyra coughed up a little blood?
Otherwise, great chapter. Can't wait to see more.:pinkiehappy:

Awww yesss this is perfect:pinkiehappy:

This is pretty darn funny, I'm really liking this story so far, can't wait to see more.:twilightsmile:

Not bad, I like. Check out my story and throw me some feedback my way.


Protag you dumb idiot. Of course she is going to say that she is going to say that she is fine, she doesn't want anyone to worry. Unfortunately, this is a huge red flag (unless Bons has acute bronchitis). Needless to say, they should be worried and they should force Bons to go to the hospital. But odds are Bons knows the cause (cancer) and she is dying (I'd give her a month tops).

Well guys, so far feedback seems pretty much nothing but positive! Thanks a lot for checking this story out and leaving comments, and I'll get to work on the next chapter.

Sorry I'm new to this website, like four days fresh here

6642405 My bad. Still though, you should have looked around some groups and submitted your stories there. Anyways, good luck.

Not really a fan of Lyra and Bon Bon, sorry, but I read the first 7 paragraphs and it's not bad. Plus I love the cover image. :pinkiesmile:

So wait, they have tails which means they're ponies, but you mention "hands" all the time :applejackconfused:. Does this mean they're humans with tails with wings and horns?:pinkiegasp: I mean in the movie, they clearly don't have those so your implying that this is not like the movie, but rather another human world where those things exist? Sorieez for asking :twilightblush:. Since the movie didn't have those, I got used to it. (New to FiMfiction BTW. Almost a month actually so forgive me since I'm really just new to all this :scootangel:)

You know what I like more than pancakes?


Looks like this fic involves LyraBon shipping :heart:, but why does the mc sounds like he really has an interest for Lyra :trixieshiftright:? But I'm fine as long as he doesn't cross the line of that ship and his space :rainbowhuh: Well now that I think about it :twilightoops:, maybe I wouldn't mind for it to happen except poor Bon Bon will have no one :applecry::fluttershyouch: But I'm sure this is not what you had in mind since you're living with the two mares and decide to steal the other :flutterrage:. Plus, it would screw up the story since the main plot at the moment is recalling back his past :derpyderp1:.

Expensive or not, pretty sure you just need to wash those pillows and it'll be good as new :pinkiehappy:!

You reach for the pancakes, but Lyra smacks your hand before you can grab one.

Guess you could say he got Dishonored :moustache:. Okieez, I'mma stap now. I just got infected by my friends and their bad puns :derpytongue2:. It's so bad, that I like it so I joined them (so yeah, making bad puns is intented) :facehoof::rainbowlaugh:

Now I'm starving.:raritydespair: Better get me some snacks or else I'll start drooling all over :rainbowwild:.

Just like most stories :ajbemused:, ponies just pop out of the Evergreen Forest with no memory and happen to come across Ponyville :unsuresweetie:.

Yea... Some ponies are just rude you know :rainbowhuh:. They're just Darude to most ponies (pun doesn't make any sense at all, but again, intended bad pun is intended :rainbowlaugh:).

Cinemare sins: Lyra isn't my girlfriend in this scene. Ding! :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Overall, the introduction really delivers what most stories should start with; the plot and the curiosity it brings from the readers :twilightsmile: I am certainly intrigued by this :raritystarry: Though don't count I will be reading often since I have a busy schedule :twilightblush: Anyways, this story really stands and delivers. I just hope you keep it that way since there are writer who only have good endings but dissatisfying start and vice versa. But who am I to judge? :rainbowderp: Though I appreciate your vocabulary since it's rich in detail. :duck: Not much I can say since it's just the intro. Hope you continue this story all the way , all the way to the friendship games! till the bitter end. And I understand slow updates, but you have the right to do so. You are making a fic that is free to all so it's only your right to take your time on the updates :yay:.

With regards,
MysticCptTidalStirling29 ;P. (Sorieez as well for being really long :applejackunsure:. It's a habit or something :twilightsheepish:. Plus I really love to talk about everything :flutterrage:!)

6664898 Dang it. My emoticons don't work again! This is why I prefer PC, but my parents don't let me use it most of the time! I just really have a creative mind. One of its benefits is that you'd read my comments with emoticons. Hehehe. It's already boring to read a text with no emoticons. *Sigh*

Notice the Anthro tag bro.

I love this story. I'd love to see it continue. and make its way to number one.

That's nice.

I'm amazed that a child sounding so young can catch a frisbee, its exceedingly difficult even for 8 and 9 year olds. 'My' boy must have mad diskin' skills.:ajsmug:

Also the explanation was quite a run on, but I get that it's meant to be intense.

One question, that I'm scared to know the answer to: Where's Bonny?

Morning Doc. What’s up?”


Well, you've made me really interested. For one, you end this chapter on a cliffhanger, making me beg for more soon, and you are making me have to decide between my favorite ship or wanting to have "myself" hook up with best background pony! More, please!

6664936 Danke shön :twilightsmile::pinkiehappy: (Not German BTW. This is just my preference when saying thank you)! Though I must admit, that's the only tag I didn't notice :facehoof:. Usually like this when I'm mind block or something (and I was at that time) :derpytongue2:. Anyways, danke again for pointing it out! :rainbowkiss:

I'm a little bit surprised that Lyra didn't react to the nosebleed.
Apart from that though, really enjoying this story so far! Definitely following this :twilightsmile:

well let the uncontrollable sobbing begin:fluttercry:

6774907 shall i break out the titanic string band?

Oh Bonny, don't die!!!:fluttercry:

Crying like the guy of "best cry ever"

This isn't going to be easy. Death of a close person never is.
Welp... there goes nothing, huh?

Quite good chapter, Mr. Pwn. I've been through the same thing as the protagonist and Lyra and this chap makes me feel and remember those times :ajsleepy:
And you've also left a good ingredient brewing in the drama pot so I now expect the following chapters with great interest :derpytongue2:
So overall, nice emotional chapter :raritycry: :yay:

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