Star Wars: A Second Chance

by Dorath

Ch. 8; Interlude - Conversations In Canterlot

The hustle and noise of Canterlot Station surrounded Revan as she stepped down from the Ponyville Express, where she paused for a quick stretch, before she set off into the surrounding throng of brightly colored ponies. It didn’t take long for a sardonic smile to grow on the Jedi’s face as she noticed the ponies that stopped to gawk as she passed, or the small bubble of space that kept her free of the jostling crowd, ‘Always going to be the freak. Even with the ridiculous number of sentient races on this planet, I’ll always be the one who sticks out, the one who doesn’t fit. And I damn well better get used to it,’ Revan thought, as her eye ceaselessly scanned the crowd.

Her longer legs carried Revan along at a brisk pace, and it wasn’t long before she let out a relieved breath as she left the crush of the main streets for a quite avenue. Pulling a note from her pouch, Revan double-checked the address and time of this “appointment” that the Princesses had requested of her. ‘Given how much she reads, and what a little perfectionist she is, I’m surprised at how bad Twi’s writing is,’ she chuckled quietly, ‘No wonder she has Spike take her dictation most of the time.’

Making her way along the street, Revan eventually found her destination, a small, unassuming building that looked like someone’s home, an unobtrusive sign next to the door declared “Hopeful Understanding, PsyD”. Revan’s brow furrowed for a moment as she tried to puzzle out the strange acronym, before she shrugged and raised her hand to knock.

________________________________________

Hopeful Understanding, counselling psychologist and former guardpony, smiled up at the blue biped on her doorstep, “Good afternoon, Dame Revan, you’re a bit early, but there’s no reason we can’t get started. Come in, come in.”

Leading the way to her home office, Hopeful settled into her seat and waved at another chair with her wing. The pegasus took a moment to study her newest patient, who was currently examining the room as if she suspected somepony was hiding behind the bookcases or in the potted plants. ‘She looks … almost delicate, even with her height, especially with the eyepatch and her arm bound up in a sling,’ Hopeful absently tapped the arm of her chair as she thought, ‘She’s not fragile, however she may appear, but I don’t like the look in her eye.’ “My name is Hopeful Understanding,” the pegasus introduced herself, “Did the Princesses explain why they asked you to come and speak with me?”

Revan shrugged, “Not really, something about an interview? Does this mean you have work for me?” she smiled cheerfully at Hopeful, but the pegasus found the expression to be mechanical, something done purely out of habit.

“I’m afraid not.” Hopeful explained gently, “The Princesses felt you could benefit from some therapy, especially given your experiences and your current circumstances.”

“Therapy? You’re a mental health counsellor?” Revan’s friendly expression dropped away to be replaced with a cold sneer, “Well isn’t that just frelling grand.”

Hopeful cocked her head slightly at Revan’s sudden hostility, “You have something against psychologists?” Seeing the Jedi’s confusion, she clarified, “Mental health counsellors?”

“What was your first clue?” Revan retorted frostily as she frowned at the pony.

“Would you tell me why?”

Revan continued to scowl at the pegasus for a time before finally responding, “I’ve got no tolerance for anyone who thinks they can pass judgement on how I’m supposed to feel about my frelling life, especially when they’ve never been through anything even remotely similar.”

“I’m not here to criticize you, Revan, I’m here to help you, if you’ll let me,” Hopeful assured, “And while I doubt that there is anyone in Equestria who can fully understand what you’ve gone through on a personal level, my life and yours are not completely dissimilar. I served two tours with the Royal Guard before I left to study for my practice.” She smiled reassuringly, “We have that in common, at least.”

Hopeful was glad to see that the anger in Revan’s eye had faded a little, encouraged, she decided to try again, “Is your aversion to counsellors why you decided to ‘own’ the issues from your past?”

Revan shrugged noncommittally, “I’ve always preferred the Sith’s method, anyway,” she replied, her voice distracted.

“The ‘Sith’s method’?”

The Jedi gave a startled flinch, apparently, she hadn’t realized that she had spoken her thoughts aloud, “Frell it,” she said after a few seconds of reflection, “It’s not like the old wars are going to matter to anyone here anyway. The Sith hold that if your past was … damaged,” she bared her teeth at Hopeful in a mocking smile, “You can either let it drive you forward and give you strength, or you can let it break you. And the Sith have no use for you if you’re broken.”

“There is more than one way to be broken,” Hopeful demurred, “This … outlook does not sound like the Jedi Order, at least from how you described them to the Princesses, are these ‘Sith’ a variant sect?”

Revan snorted at the pony’s question, “‘A variant sect’? Yeah, you could say that, you could also say that the Sith and the Jedi are the opposites sides of the credit chip. The Jedi preach detachment, serenity, and protection, they’re big on the whole martial pacifism thing. The Sith, the Sith are all about passion, pushing your limits, and aggression, to a Sith, the best way to deal with an enemy or threat is to obliterate it before it can harm you and yours.”

‘She’s opening up to me a little, at least,’ Hopeful thought as she wrote down a few notes, “Do you ever regret leaving the Sith?”

“Wait, what?”

“Your expression, as well as vocal tone, can reveal a lot,” Hopeful explained, “Plus, my special talent is empathy.”

“Cheater,” Revan accused the pegasus, although she was grinning as she said it, “Yeah, I regret it, sometimes, the Sith took me in, taught me what I was and how to control my abilities, made me into more than just another hired blaster. And I betrayed them. My own troops would do their damnedest to send me to chaos if they ever saw me, now,” Revan sighed, all the humor drained from her, “You do what you have to, and live with the consequences, I guess.”

“And you had to leave the Sith?” Hopeful pressed, “You couldn’t find what you needed with them?”

“Some folk I knew before I joined the Sith pointed out that I was losing myself, and I found that I believed them, and then there was the fact that some of my powers were developing a lot faster than my control, making me a danger to my soldiers. So I left,” the Jedi shrugged as if the matter was of no great consequence to her, “I always fit in better with the Sith, than I ever did in the Order.” Revan chuckled, though Hopeful found it as mechanical as her earlier smile had been, “Cold pragmatism and bloodlust aren’t really part of the Code, you know?”

The pegasus frowned at Revan, “You left to protect your troops, but they would still attack you for it?” ‘There’s following orders and procedures, but turning on a member of the squad like that is just wrong!’

“A traitor is still a traitor, whatever the reason for it,” Revan suddenly stood up, “Well, it’s been … nice … speaking with you, Counsellor, but I have to go do … a thing … at the place …”

Hopeful rose to her own hooves as she pulled a small card out from her desk and offered it to the Jedi, “If you ever want to talk, Revan, my door is always open.”

Revan took the card from her hoof and looked at it for a few seconds, before giving Hopeful a sharp nod as she slipped the card into one of her belt pouches and turned for the door, “Good day to you, Counsellor.”

‘Not the best start for therapy,’ Hopeful sighed to herself, ‘but we must have faith,’ she sat back at her desk to begin her preliminary report for the Princesses.

________________________________________

“How was your meeting?” The Princess of the Sun was seated at table in one of the castle’s smaller dinning chambers, enjoying a quite supper in the company of her little sister and Ponyville’s resident Jedi.

‘It was a thing,” Revan replied, tossing an irritated glance at the alicorn, “You know, I don’t appreciate being thrown to a mental health counsellor, even if Hopeful was less sanctimonious than most I’ve met.”

“You were not ‘thrown’ to anypony,” Celestia countered, “You were made aware of a potential source of treatment, Dr. Hopeful is highly recommended, might I add, and given a chance to embrace the help that, to be perfectly blunt, you are in great need of.”

“I am with thou, Revan Vao,” Luna cut in, forestalling the Jedi’s retort, “I cannot bring mineself to fully trust these ‘psychologist’ either.”

Celestia rolled her eyes in exasperation at the both of them, before turning the conversation to less touchy, she hoped, matters, “How are you finding Ponyville?”

“It’s nice, if bizarre,” seeing the inquiring looks from the two alicorns, Revan clarified, “Last week a pony just burst into song, out of nowhere, and almost two dozen other ponies up and joined in like they had rehearsed the whole thing. It was entertaining as all chaos, but, like I said, bizarre.”

The warm sound of the sisters’ laughter filled the room, “I suppose our little ponies’ penchant for heartsongs is rather curious to those who are not used to it,” Luna observed, “Thou have been keeping thyself occupied? I am well aware of how poorly some deal with extended periods of convalescence.” The younger alicorn smirked at her sister, who responded with proper regal decorum, by sticking her tongue out at her fellow diarch.

Revan snickered at the princesses’ antics, “I try and keep busy. I even went out with Cloud Kicker, one of the local weatherponies, earlier this week,” she smiled at the memory, “I’m also spending a lot of time at the library with Twi’, answering questions and learning about Equestria.”

As she turned towards Luna, Revan’s face lost its earlier cheerfulness, “I’m glad that the girls and these ‘elements’ were able to free you, Princess, I’ve dealt with dark spirits before, and I wouldn’t wish possession on anyone,” she said gravely.

Luna’s ears dropped flat to her head as she looked away, “The Nightmare hurt so many, because I was weak, because I allowed mineself to become a danger to mine sister and our little ponies …”

“That’s enough!” Revan slammed her hand on the table as she angrily interrupted the lunar diarch, “This ‘Nightmare’ wore you like a frelling meat-suit, Luna! Its actions are on its head, not yours, if you keep tearing at yourself over what it did, you’re letting the bastard rule your life from the grave!”

“Thou speak as if dealing with mine blame was a simple thing,” Luna observed despondently, but her ears had risen slightly.

“Simple? Probably not for you,” Revan conceded, “It will take time, and somethings cannot be forgiven, but eventually, you need to stop condemning yourself for things you had no control over.”

The little group passed the next few minutes in a bleak silence, then Revan broke the somber mood when she leaned forward and leered at the younger princess, “If it helps, I’ll happily spank you whenever you start to backslide.” Her outlandish offer drew a surprised laugh from Luna, as Revan purred at the Princess of the Night, “I’ve had dreams about disciplining a naughty princess.”

“I fear I must decline thy most generous offer,” Luna asserted loftily, although her attempt at reclaiming her royal dignity was helped by neither her burning cheeks nor by Celestia’s giggles.

The conversation between the three turned to more mundane matters and common small talk for a time, although Luna remained pensive. Eventually, the small gathering wound down as Luna’s duties called for her attention, still, the lunar diarch delayed her departure for a final word with their guest, “Revan Vao, I would make an accord with thee.”

“Eh? What about?”

“I will try to separate mine actions from the Nightmare’s, and I vow to do mine best to shoulder only the weight of mine own sins, if,” Luna raised a hoof to point at the Jedi, “if, thou agrees to continue to see Counsellor Hopeful and thou tries to let her help thee.”

Revan blinked at Luna, “No spankings?” she pouted.

“No spankings,” Luna asserted, as she did her best to ignore her own heated cheeks and Celestia’s newest fit of giggles, “I understand that what I request may be no simpler for thou than mine own efforts will be for me, but that is the pact I ask of thee.”

Revan mulled over the alicorn’s offer for a few moments, before she hesitantly nodded her head in agreement, “Fine, I’ll do it, but only for your sake, Luna.”

Smiling her thanks, Luna excused herself, leaving Revan and Celestia alone in the dinning chamber. The elder princess watched for a time as Revan broodingly stroked her lek, before she finally intruded on the Jedi’s thoughts, “There’s no need to look so grim, Revan, you’re not being punished, after all. Luna and I only want to help you, and we believe that Counsellor Hopeful could be of great assistance, if you’d only let her.”

“Help,” Revan grunted, “Everyone wants to help me, you, Luna, Hopeful, the girls back in Ponyville, all of you want to help me ‘cope with’ my past, regardless of whether I actually want help or not. When did I become such a charity case?” Seeing the worry on Celestia’s face, she smiled crookedly as she leaned over to give the alicorn’s foreleg a quick squeeze, “I get that you’re all just concerned, I do, but I’ll be damned if I can understand why the frell any of you care so much.”

“‘Harmony, understanding and friendship’, remember? And a part of friendship is looking out for those you care about even when, or especially when, you are worried that they are not looking after themselves, even if your friend does not, or cannot, see why their behavior has you concerned.” Celestia levitated her cup of tea to her lips and watched Revan over the rim as she considered the Princess’ words, ‘Not as promising a beginning as I might have hoped for, but still, Luna and Revan are both at least willing to try, however reluctantly.’

Comments

[Titan Commander Sebaste]

Hmm...

[nospeedy]

What time period of starwars is this in?

[Dorath]

7158788 The timeline is rather flexible, so the story could take place anywhere between roughly 300 years after the Galactic War (so about 250+ years after everything that occurs in the Old Republic MMO) and a century or two before Darth Bane formalized the Rule of Two (about 1,000 years before Phantom Menace).

So, Revan Vao's life occurred anywhere between 3593 BBY and 1100 BBY, +/- 28 years.

[Throwback_Meme]

The elder princess watched for a time as Revan broodingly stroked her lek

Is that as awkward to write, and think in your head, as it is for me to read it?

[Dorath]

7238775 Yes, yes it is

Sadly, using "lek" (the "official" term) is still easier than writing "cranial-tendrils" or "head-tails" all the time (especially when Revan is the current PoV character).

Sorry if it screwed with your enjoyment of the story ...

[Skalula7]

This was certainly a spit take inducing chapter.

[Dorath]

7281781 <evil chuckle>

[Onion Cutting Ninja]

Why does Revan remind me of Undyne from undertale?

[Armageden]

“No spankings,” Luna asserted, as she did her best to ignore her own heated cheeks and Celestia’s newest fit of giggles, “I understand that what I request may be no simpler for thou than mine own efforts will be for me, but that is the pact I ask of thee.”

Holy shit this is hilarious.

[Dorath]

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