1 Apple = 8 Bits

by NTSTS

Ponvyille Adventure [Revolutionary New Interface!]

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>Applejack awakes, standing in a small section of town square. The weather is cloudy overhead, and the town of Ponyville is vacant around her as far as the eye can see. The town fountain is in the center of her immediate vicinity. Obvious exists are – NORTH, SOUTH, EAST, WEST
>”What the heck? I can’t see anything! Where the heck am I?”
>I’m sorry, I don’t understand your command.
>”Who said that? Pinkie, is that you?”
>I’m sorry, I don’t know how to “WHO SAID THAT”
>”For Celestia’s sake… I’ve had enough of this stupid place already! I want out of here!”
>Obvious exits are NORTH, SOUTH, EAST, WEST
>”Would be nice if I could see any of those! Can’t go anywhere when I’m blind, can I? Tell me to go north or south if I can’t tell which is which…”
>GO NORTH
>You are standing in a section of Ponyville town square. The fountain is several feet behind you. To your right, there is a scenic PARK BENCH. The rest of the market district stretches EAST, and residential buildings are NORTH. Obvious exits are NORTH, EAST, SOUTH.
>”Can’t I just tell you where I want to go? If this is Ponyville, I want to go home. Take me to Sweet Apple Acres!”
>I’m sorry, I don’t understand your command.
>”GO! Go to Sweet Apple Acres!”
>I’m sorry, I don’t know how to GO TO SWEET APPLE ACRES.
>”… What do you want? Do you want me to just lie down and wait to wake up? Because I don’t believe any of this is real. If I have to pass out in the dark and wait for things to go back to normal I will… “
>I’m sorry, I don’t understand your command.
>”… Isn’t this enough? I get it, ‘video games’ are awful, but I won’t badmouth ‘em anymore. I swear, just let me go back home and never have to spend another second in this stupid place…”
>I’m sorry, I don’t understand your command.
>”…….”
>”…What can I see again?”
>I’m sorry, I don’t know how to WHAT CAN I SEE
“This is horsefeathers! See, what can I see! Look! Um… gander! Tell me what’s around me!”
>LOOK
>You are standing in a section of Ponyville town square. The fountain is several feet behind you. To your right, there is a scenic PARK BENCH. The rest of the market district stretches EAST, and residential buildings are NORTH. Obvious exits are NORTH, EAST, SOUTH.
>”That’s it? Some exits and a park bench?”
>SIT PARK BENCH
>YOU NEED THE LYRIST CLASS TO DO THAT
>”GO NORTH.”
>GO NORTH
>You begin your walk into the housing district of Ponyville. Houses stretch out in front of you for blocks. A small MARKET STALL is to your left, but it is unoccupied. A PURPLE UNICORN is standing to your right. Obvious exits are NORTH, SOUTH.
>”Purple Unicorn? Is that Twilight? Twilight, please tell me you can hear me!”
>PURPLE UNICORN
>What do you want to do with the PURPLE UNICORN?
>”Uh…. Go? Go… to Twilight… purple unicorn?”
>GO PURPLE UNICORN
>You can’t go there.
>”Consarnit! Uh… see. I see Twilight. Can I do anything else?”
>I’m sorry, I don’t understand your command.
>”Look? Can I look at Twilight – er, purple unicorn?”
>LOOK PURPLE UNICORN
>You see a PURPLE UNICORN. Her mane is lilac and magenta. She is very pretty.
>”Ugh. Can I talk to her… talk to the purple unicorn?”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>You say hello to the PURPLE UNICORN in a jovial manner. She turns her head from her reading and greets you with a smile.
>”Applejack, oh my goodness! What are you doing here?”
>”Twilight? Thank Celestia! I was starting to go crazy from this thing.”
>The PURPLE UNICORN blinks at you expectantly.
>”Shut up you stupid thing, I’m talking to Twilight! Twilight, please tell me you know what’s going on, I can’t stand much more of this place…”
>The PURPLE UNICORN looks suddenly surprised, and pulls a note from her book bag. She scribbles on it with a pen and places it on the ground.
>”Twilight, why ain’t you talkin? Do I gotta say something to this stupid thing to get it to let me talk to you…”
>The PURPLE UNICORN nudges the note insistently.
>”Oh, for… alright, I look at the note.”
>LOOK NOTE
>You see a note on the ground with delicate cursive scribbled across it.
>”Great, and what does it say?”
>I’m sorry, I don’t understand your command.
>”GAAH! Please, just tell me what’s on the note! I just want to read the note!”
>READ NOTE
>The note says: ‘Applejack, you have to tell it exactly what you want to do before you do it! If you want to talk to me, you have to say ‘Talk’ and then me! Then you can tell me what you want to say. It works with everything else too… if you want to take my note, you can say ‘Take Note’ and it’ll let you pick it up!”
>”Leave it to Twilight to figure out somethin’ this ridiculous… alright then. TALK – TWILIGHT.”
>I’m sorry, I don’t see a TWILIGHT.
>”…”
>”TALK, PURPLE UNICORN.”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>”Yay, you did it! It took me some work to figure out too… I’ve been trying to get the full set of commands for the last little while; I think I have it almost all worked out.”
>”At least one of us understands what’s goin’ on… Twilight, please tell me you’ve worked out how to make this whole crazy thing stop. Pinkie says she thinks it happened when I…er, when the magic box thing got broke, by accident.”
>”…”
>”Talk, purple unicorn.”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>”Hmm… that definitely would explain the huge influx of transformative magic that’s caused this sort of dimensional adjustment. I’ve been too busy studying the command inputs to figure out what might be causing this… frankly, I think it’s fascinating. Imagine if the real world was dictated so rigidly by sets of rules like this! Wouldn’t it be amazing?”
>”I’d just like everything to go back to normal, iffn’ ya please… er, talk, purple unicorn.”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>”Oh… well, I can sort of understand. I don’t imagine this would be much fun for some pony not as inclined for elaborate thinking as I am.”
>”Glare purple unicorn.”
>I’m sorry, I don’t know how to GLARE.
>”Ugh… Twilight, can you just tell me how to get everything back to normal? Talk purple unicorn.”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>”Sure! It’s pretty straightforward, I think. I mean, systems designed for player engagement have a set of rules that govern their play, and upon completion, the conditions of the system are met and the outcome resolves! Speaking simply… if you beat the game, it should reorient the rules systems, if not returning everything to normal.”
>”So I have to beat this stupid ‘walk here do this look that’ thing to fix everything? I don’t suppose you have any clue on how I’d do that, talk purple unicorn?”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>”I think I might have a pretty good idea. When I was studying the commands I found out I can use my magic to analyze the environment pretty well… the end objective seems to be a talisman in Sugar Cube corner. Head there and pick it up, and that should satisfy the completion conditions.”
>”If you know where it is, why haven’t you picked it up and ended the game yet? Talk purple unicorn.”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>”Oh, I was having too much fun studying everything. But you can go ahead if you want.”
>”Of course you were… well, thank you, Twilight. I reckon’ I’ll head over there and get out of this crazy choose your own adventure book. Talk purple unicorn.”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>”Good luck Applejack! Let me know if you need any more help.”
>”Can do Twilight, talk purple unicorn.”
>TALK PURPLE UNICORN
>The PURPLE UNICORN smiles at you and returns to her reading.
>”Look.”
>LOOK
> Houses stretch out in front of you for blocks. A small MARKET STALL is to your left, but it is unoccupied. A PURPLE UNICORN is standing to your right, she is very pretty. Obvious exits are NORTH, SOUTH.
>”I’m getting better at this. Go south.”
>GO SOUTH
> You are standing in a section of Ponyville town square. The fountain is several feet behind you. To your right, there is a scenic PARK BENCH. The rest of the market district stretches-
>”Yeah yeah, go south.”
>GO SOUTH
> The weather is cloudy overhead, and the town of Ponyville is-
>”Go south, go south, go east, go south, go east, go north.”
>You are standing in front of the local bakery, SUGAR CUBE CORNER. The sign on the door proclaims the name for all of Ponyville to see. There is a garish bell aside the door, and a welcome mat with a smiling pony’s face on it. Obvious exits are SOUTH.
>”Uh… shoot. Go inside Sugar Cube Corner?”
>I’m sorry, I don’t know how to GO INSIDE.
>”Uh… open Sugar Cube Corner?”
>I’m sorry, I can’t OPEN that.
>”Open door?”
>You open the door and enter SUGAR CUBE CORNER. The smell of sweets wafts across your olfactory perception, making your mouth water with its deliciousness. There is a small wooden table in the center of the room, and the bakery counter stretches out to your left laden with all manner of delectable deserts. Atop the table, there is a delicately crafted TALISMAN.
>”That was easier than it had any right to be. Take talisman.”

Comments

[nemryn]

>XYZZY

[Twifight Sparkill]

Oh my! This had me laughing so hard! I remember these text games very well... infuriating things! TALK PURPLE UNICORN indeed!

- What the heck is a Zork anyway?

[The Grey Pegasus]

Interactive text adventures!

[Ezn]

>You can't get ye talisman!

[ConsciousHaze196]

Semi-duplex talk!