Treats and Such
Treats and Such
13
Location: [DATA EXPUNGED], Earth
Site: T-SF-[DATA EXPUNGED]
Sector: [DATA EXPUNGED]
Designation: OVERWATCH Complex
Laboratory 20-C
He had decided to oversee work on the portal personally. It was coming along well. They were so close, He could feel it. So very close.
“I want a sit-rep on the portal.” His voice filled the room as he walked in, hands locked behind his back, authority lining every word.
One of the white coated lab workers turned in his chair, breaking his gaze from the data flowing across the monitor.
“Well, sir, the portal is working just fine. Everything seems to be operational, but we can’t seem to keep it open. Something is interfering with the transmitters and breaking the lock when the portal actually opens.”
He stared at the unnamed crone for a moment, keeping His temper in check. Good leaders did not show anger. They kept calm, they were unnerved, and so He shall be. At least, in front of His subordinates.
“And what is it that’s stopping us?”
The worker flinched, knowing that his job, and most likely his life, were in danger if he answered incorrectly.
“Uh, we don’t know what it could be. We’ve checked every possible scientific query but we’re stumped.”
“We’re dealing with more than science. Consider every route. Get it done.”
He turned on His heel and strode out of the room. He let his fingers drag against the smooth, metallic wall as He made His way back to His office.
That worker would be dealt with later. If you kill too many worthless subordinates, people start to ask questions.
That didn’t change the fact that there was still something stopping Him. He would not stand for it.
He paused in the hallway, making sure no one was around to see him. He allowed his hand to slip off the wall, letting it dangle at his side. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and punched the wall with enough force to leave a large dent, scarring the otherwise smooth, flawless metal.
He would not show it, but He was angry. Very angry, but he was so very close.
**********
Princess Celestia looked up from her cake. It was never not the time to have cake.
She looked around, wondering what it was that she felt before finally placing it.
‘Well, someone is angry.’ She thought to herself as a smug smile crossed her face.
She turned back to her platter with a small chuckle as she prepared to relish the oncoming, sweet, creamy flavor of her cake.
**********
Rainbow Dash sat lazily in the open window of Twilight’s guest room, popping an occasional berry into her mouth. Jay was sleeping peacefully in his bed, looking comfortable. How he had managed to tangle himself in the bed sheets into the position he was in was beyond her.
‘He looks a bit too comfortable. Better change that.’ She thought with an evil grin.
She lined up her shot, and tossed a berry, hitting Jay perfectly between the eyes.
She watched as Jay crinkled his nose as he sleepily lifted his hoof, swiping at the air in the direction that the berry came from before entrenching himself deeper into his covers.
Rainbow Dash giggled at her own shenanigans, took aim once more, and let another berry fly, hitting Jay right on the snout.
Jay crinkled his nose again and moaned, turning onto his side in his bed before settling back in.
‘Huh, he’s cute when he’s annoyed. Couple more should do it.’
Rainbow Dash wound up and let fly once more, the berry finding purchase on his cheek.
“Mmmm seriously... fivemoreminutes...” Jay grumbled, turning onto his other side.
This time, Rainbow Dash was in it to win it. She popped one more berry in her mouth before taking the rest and tossing them at Jay.
That got him. Jay waved his hoofs around in the air as if to fend off an invisible attacker before rolling off the bed and landing in a heap on the floor, still tangled in his bed covers.
“Alright. I’m up.” He moaned.
He flailed around on the floor for a second trying to untangle himself from the awkward position his covers had left him in. That was when he realized he could simply jump out.
He appeared outside of his balled up covers, kicking them with a hoof believing that the covers should be punished for their accursed entanglement and leaving them in a mess on the floor, also as a form of punishment. They needed to be taught that they shouldn’t tangle ponies that early in the morning.
He didn’t even notice Rainbow Dash hovering beside him, watching his display of violence towards the covers.
“What are you doing?”
“Gah!” Jay’s immediate reaction was to jump, appearing in a prone position under the guest bed.
He frowned when he realized who it was and just how stupid he had made himself look.
“It’s way too early for you to be doing that, Dash.” Jay said, crawling out from under his sanctuary.
Rainbow Dash seemed to be enjoying herself, however. She had both her forehooves clamped over her snout trying to stifle the oncoming burst of laughter.
She lowered her hooves and landed softly back into the windowsill in her lounging position, smiling the whole time. “Sorry, I just couldn’t help myself!”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m sure you couldn’t,” Jay grunted in reply. “So I’m up Dash, what do you need?”
Rainbow Dash’s smile disappeared in an instant and for a moment, she looked unsure of herself, but that was quickly replaced with another, more nervous-looking, smile. “I was wondering if, ya know, you wanted to get a milkshake at Sugarcube Corner, or somethin’.”
Just at the mention of the word ‘milkshake’, Jay was gone. Oh milkshakes. So velvety and creamy, filled with enough sugar to take a year off of your life. His mouth started to water as he imagined the cool mass sliding across his taste buds with the sole purpose of getting into his belly as fast as possible. He could just see it: his perfect milkshake, thick and creamy in a tall fluted glass covered in delicious whipped cream with a ripe cherry on top, and it always had to be chocolate. Anything other than a chocolate milkshake didn’t deserve to be called a milkshake.
Unbeknownst to Jay, his tongue had lolled out of his mouth and his eyes had glazed over as his mind swirled with visions of sweet deliciousness. His thoughts were unwelcomely interrupted as a cyan hoof bopped him on the head.
“Anyone still home in there?” Rainbow Dash was staring at him with a bemused look, probably wondering if she should call for help.
And so Jay was brought back into reality, where there was no milkshake waiting in front of him, and it was a cruel reality.
“Huh... Uh, yeah, I could go for a milkshake, Dash.” Just that thought that there were milkshakes in this new world made Jay giddy.
“Awesome!” Rainbow Dash said, her smile a bit wider than before. “I’ll meet you downstairs.”
Disregarding the perfectly useful stairs, she launched herself out the window to wait for Jay.
‘What a perfect way to reward a hard day of work yesterday,’ he thought as he trotted over to the bag of bits Applejack had ‘forced’ him to take.
“Now how the hell do I carry this?”
**********
“Mmf fmm mmm!” The bag of bits dangled loosely from Jay’s mouth as he trotted along the path to Sugarcube Corner next to Rainbow Dash. His speech ability had been severely limited and making conversation was next to impossible, all thanks to a stupid bag.
Twilight had kindly offered up a pair of saddlebags to borrow for the day, but something about the color purple was a bit too feminine for Jay to be seen in, so he opted to go without. Not the brightest decision, certainly, but it was one he could live with.
Rainbow Dash had, however, come up with her own pair of saddlebags seemingly out of nowhere (which, at this point, Jay was starting to believe she had stashed them there earlier on and had already anticipated him to say yes).
She hovered along lazily next to Jay, taking great amusement in his attempts to talk (walking just wasn’t her style). Jay could have jumped, he could have saved himself the hassle of walking with the stupid bag clenched between his jaws and he could have saved himself the embarrassment that came with trying to talk, but something told him not to. Must be a Jumper thing.
Jay finally decided to give up in his attempts to talk, and contented himself with simply nodding his head or grunting a reply. It’s not like he was listening to Rainbow Dash ramble on anyway, he was too focused on the images of milkshakes that danced in his head.
“-and then I bucked her right and the face and- Hey! We’re here!”
Rainbow Dash’s exclamation quickly snapped Jay out of his revelry. ‘So we are.’
Sugarcube Corner was certainly... odd. It was as if the whole building was made out of sweets. The place even smelled sweet! As they were about to walk in, he paused and stared at one of the support beams outside the door. It looked vaguely like the base of a peppermint candy cane.
‘I wonder...’ Jay set the bag of bits down next to him and inched closer to the beam, opening his mouth to take a bite.
“Jay! Come on!” Rainbow Dash shouted from inside the shop, stopping him from clamping down on the tasty peppermint-looking beam.
He turned his eyes to the door, then back to the beam. ‘To be continued,’ he thought as he snatched up his bag and trotted through the door.
“Hey Dashie!”
‘Oh no. I recognize that voice.’
“And you have teleporter pony with you!” Pinkie Pie jumped out from behind the counter and shoved her face closer to Jay than he would have liked. “Have you teleported anywhere cool? Huh? Like the moon? Ooh I want to go to the moon! Ya know, some ponies say that the moon is made of cheese! Wouldn’t that be silly? Moon cheese! I wonder if there’s a cheese flavored cupcakes! Oh and moon flavored cupcakes! But if the moon is cheese, then that would mean-”
Rainbow Dash was slow in the rescue, but finally came to his aid. “Hey Pinkie Pie,” she said as she pushed her back from Jay. “Can we get a couple of milkshakes?”
“Milkshakes! I’m on it!” Pinkie said with a mock salute. “I wonder if you can make cheese milkshakes!” Pinkie Pie shot towards the kitchen, eager to try out her new theory.
“Just normal milkshakes, Pinkie!” Rainbow Dash shouted after her.
Jay spit out the bag in his mouth. “And make mine chocolate!” He was sure his words fell on deaf ears, however, as Pinkie Pie was already gone.
“So... Dashie?” Jay said with a smug smile and a raised eyebrow.
Rainbow Dash shot him a look that screamed certain demise if he were to continue on the subject, so Jay shrugged as he pushed his bag of bits towards Rainbow Dash. “Here Dashie, it’s on me. I’m going to wait outside.” Jay was eager to leave before the pink menace made her return.
Exiting the shop, he looked around to see if anypony was paying attention to him. When he was certain his business was his own, he turned to the candy-cane looking support beam.
“So we meet again.” He closed in on the beam, ready to finally take a bite and confirm his suspicions of a candy crafted building.
“Thanks Pinkie!’ Rainbow Dash hovered outside past Jay, carrying what looked like two masterfully crafted milkshakes. “Let’s go sit over here,” she said as she made her way to one of the outdoor tables.
Jay hung his head in defeat and followed Rainbow Dash. ‘You may have won the battle, beam, but not the war.’ He thought in a vain attempt to console himself.
He plopped himself into the chair of the table Rainbow Dash had picked out and found himself face to face with chocolaty, creamy heaven. Despite everything, Pinkie Pie definitely knew what she was doing. A lone tear streaked down his cheek as he prepared himself to devour the treat.
“Are you ok?” Rainbow Dash looked at him quizzically, Jay’s fascination for milkshakes again confusing her.
Jay looked to Dash, then back at the milkshake. “I.. I’m just fine.”
**********
‘That milkshake... there are no words.’ Jay was saddened at the sight of the empty, fluted glass that sat on the table. He missed his milkshake.
It had only taken minutes to drain the glass, and in between breaths he had gotten the chance to chat with Rainbow Dash. They had talked about anything in general. How awesome milkshakes were, weather patrol, which eventually led to flight which, in turn, led to the Wonderbolts and how great they were. At that point, there was no stopping Rainbow Dash.
It was just a great day, with a great milkshake, and a great mare. Nothing could get much better.
“Howdy Rainbow Dash!” Applejack trotted up behind Rainbow Dash and upon catching sight of Jay, smiled. “Howdy, Jay!”
“Hey, Applejack. What’s up?” Rainbow Dash said, breaking off of her fangirl speech.
“Just thought Ah’d say hi.” Applejack replied, turning to Jay. “Ah I also wanted to say thanks for helpin’ out on the farm. Saved me a bit of work.” She smiled again and walked away, her tail flicking to the side as she snuck a glance back at the table.
‘Huh, I wonder what that tail thing was about?’ Jay shrugged to himself and looked back towards Rainbow Dash, quickly noticing that something was off.
She looked conflicted as she rose from her seat. “Hey, uh, I’ll see ya later, ok?”
“Uhhh, ok?” But Rainbow Dash had flown off already, leaving him talking to himself.
‘What did I do now?’ Jay gazed around, thoroughly confused. He then realized that Rainbow Dash hadn’t given his bits back, and he was now broke. Again.
“What just happened?”
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Not another one!
Expunged? Cause you don't get to know!
And gimme a break, I like milkshakes.
It's alright, post your hate here, I don't know whether I'm happy or not about this one...
Fioist.
And the battle against Sugarcube Corner? Brilliant.
And now I'm craving for a good milkshake...mmm.
lolz were gained
Milkshake.... O_O
Pinkie's milkshakes bring all the stallions to the yard...
I kinda have a thing for strawberry, but everyone has his own tastes.
Everybody now wants a milkshake... And so do i...
A fic has never made me want to consume something before.
Well played.
Well AJ, that was rather forward.
1549344
It just seemed right.
1549986
Can do!
1552200
And they're like - do you wanna trade cards
Damn right I wanna trade cards, I will trade you
But not my Charizard... Oh wrong universe!
1553890
NO!
1554608
I REALLY like milkshakes. Thought I'd share my insight.
1556207
Thanks for the catch! Now I have wonder what kind of state I'm in mentally to have missed that (and type it twice)!
1566623 Insight well shared if I do say so my self. It was Delicious
1555806
Aj's a very straight-forward mare. I thought it fit her 'honesty' personality.
I think i sense a classical anime harem female battle coming up... the kind where the females fight over this one, oblivious guy and destroy half the town during their intense battle for his love :D
gimme something if I'm right
update the story plz
1835396 the movie Thor