• Published 18th Nov 2011
  • 3,048 Views, 113 Comments

Haylo: Crimson - Zarius9998



How many kills does it take to sate a governmentally sanctioned sadist? A whole Army.

  • ...
9
 113
 3,048

Detours, Detours, and De...stroying a Chair.

You know...there's a saying I heard from some of the higher-ups in the UNSC. It applies to everyone, and recently, everypony, incorporated into the Spartan Program:

"Spartans never die, they just go missing in action."

With my squad...we see this happen many times. That...dreadful cleanup of the Marker incident...oh yeah, we found A LOT of "MIA's" there, more or less. One personal incident of this was when Luna decided to bring US along to the first introduction of Ponykind to Earth. Apparently, many humans didn't think these "small and sugary" creatures had the right stuff to be considered allies in war with them. When we were picked for this, we had it in our minds that they just didn't like us, for, from what I've heard, humans are very judgmental and prejudice against that which they don't understand...what it turned out to be was that Luna wanted us to prove that we are probably the most badass Squad in the history of intergalactic warfare...

You know...now that I have this in mind, time to take a small detour. We'll get back to My little Psycho's origins soon, but first, time to hear about our first encounter with "civilian" humans.

-------------

"Tell me why we're here again...?"

We had arrived on Earth only a few minutes ago, and we found ourselves cruising down a "highway" (whatever that is...) through their City of New Mombasa, which was apparently a recently reconstructed city FILLED with war fanatics due to it's prolonged exposure to War. I sat quietly in my seat, full armor on, looking out of the window at the passing cars and structures...Celestia, everything was HUGE there...

"You're here to give humanity a good first impression of our fellow ponies." Luna answered curtly, glaring at my currently pissed partner.

"Why us!? Celestia knows the only first impression I give is by throwing somepony though a door!" Artemis snapped back, leaning out of her seat towards Luna with a scowl.

It was true, first time I formally met her, she threw me through a door...so there we sat: Me, a silent observer. Artemis, a pissed deviant (as to what kind...I'll leave that up to you). And Luna, a calm ambassador. We rode in a somewhat small limo, with Artemis and I side by side on the back seat, and Luna facing us on the other side. The Princess, at that moment, was in her Royal form, with her ethereal mane and tail, slightly larger physique, and glasses. Artemis and I, on the other hand, had full Armor on...well, I did, anyway. Artemis had take her helmet off and set it down on the floor so she could convey her full anger through her always unnerving eyes.

"You know, Arty..." Artemis twitched, forming somewhat of a snarl. She hated that name, "I never understood why you decided to alter your armor to those gloomy colors." Luna stated with a nonchalant wave of her hoof.

"First of all...PRISS," Artemis started, gripping her armrest tightly and clenching her teeth, "It's ARTEMIS, or ARI, IF you're part of my team! And second, black and crimson is LOADS more exciting than that drab olive Rookie wears."

I rolled my eyes behind my visor, chuckling inwardly. Those two always butt head whenever they're near eachother. It was always amusing.

"If you're going to break regulation like that..."

"Pfft, if? When don't I?" Artemis interjected with a snicker.

"...As I was saying...If you're going to break regulation," Luna continued, smirking, "It would have been MUCH better if you did this!" Luna's horn flashed as the entirety of Artemis' armor, including the helmet on the floor, suddenly swapped to one entirely covered by the Blue Scale, matching the color scheme of Luna's body, "There! Beautiful!"

Artemis stared down at her armor, mouth agape. She was in so much shock that all she could do was mutter incoherently, much to Luna's delight. When Artemis finally regained her composure, she went to snap at Lune, but the Princess beat her to it.

"Oh! Wait! I know what would suit you even BETTER!" with a clap of her hooves, her horn glowed once more as Artemis' armor again morphed. This time, though, instead of just a color change, the entire armor's shape morphed...into a skimpy two-piece which emphasized her waist and chest. While, as ponies, going clothesless isn't really a problem, skimpy clothing still creates an adequate air of awkward when in the right place...much like now, "Haha! Now the fun is doubled!" Luna burst into a fit of giggles at this.

I gave Artemis a skeptical stare as she stared down at her body. She was blushing like mad and could no longer form coherent sound. I soon realized that, as soon as she DID regain her thoughts, Luna would probably end-up a stain on the ceiling, so I leaned in and shoved the Princess, causing her spell to break and Artemis' armor to return to normal. The blue Goddess gave me a slightly annoyed stare, but I merely returned it with my own. Although she couldn't actually see me, she got the point and calmed down.

"Alright, that might have been a bit out of hand for me..." Luna admitted, "I guess I should apologize."

I nodded before turning to look out the window again, as we appeared to be heading into a tunnel. When I looked back, I noticed Artemis was about to let loose a torrent of shouts, but Luna, again, cut her off.

"Artemis, Rookie, listen..." her tone brought the mare to silence, "Whatever happens, you both have to promise me that you will NOT use deadly force, understand?"

"...wh...wha...?" Artemis asked, mouth agape.

"Just promise me this!" Luna shouted, suddenly urgent, "Alright?"

"I...don't? What?" Artemis was bewildered. This was so random!

Luna grabbed Artemis' ebony helmet and moved to force it on her, "Just do this for me, and I'll owe you guys." Artemis' eyes went wide when Luna got close to whisper something to her before placing the helmet the shocked mare. I, to this day, do not know what she said.

Suddenly, while the two mares were getting back into their seats, the car surged to the right, throwing Artemis into me and Luna's head into the window.

"Ow! Buck!" she complained, rubbing her head while holding tight to the armrest as the car swerved and shook...something exploding off to the side.

After Artemis shoved herself off of me, we looked out of the window to see that our escort had been blown up and replaced by some beaten-up red car.

"We're being ambushed!" Artemis shouted, trying to find her DMR, "Where'd it go!?"

"Artemis W. Crimson!" We both turned to see Luna's serious stare...it was more unnerving than Artemis' stare, "No. Lethal. Force."

We nodded slowly before I noticed that a human had leaned out of the red car and aimed a very BIG rocket launcher at us.

Now, I barely ever talk...not anymore. But this time...it was necessary, "Get the buck down!"

Artemis looked over and saw it as well, then quickly dove at Luna, pinning her to the bed and covering her as the rocket hit our car. The next few seconds are a blur...just fire, metal, pain, street, fire, and the definition of earsplitting loudness. After everything calmed down, my shield warnings were flashing and, probably, blaring in my ears...my hearing was ringing so I couldn't tell. Everything was blurry and I felt sore all over, I knew I would pass-out soon, but before going, though, I groggily looked around in time to see the unconscious forms of Artemis and Luna thrown into another red car by some more humans. From what I caught, they wore mainly black, tattered jackets, jeans, and...and...rainbow bandanas? The assailants drove off in a small squad of three red cars, leaving me covered within parts of the wrecked car...THEN, I passed out.

-------------

When I finally awoke, my vision was shrouded in flashing blue and red lights, the sounds of radio chatter and mumbling replacing the roaring vehicle fire from earlier. After regaining my bearings, I saw I was mostly buried underneath part of the wreckage, save for my head. Since my helmet looked similar to the car's design, the attackers probably didn't spot me, which is why they didn't take me as well.

Grunting in annoyance, I rolled over onto my stomach, planted my hooves, then roughly thrust my back up, sending the debris rolling off of me in a multitude of directions. After shaking my entire body and checking to make sure all systems were still operational, I noticed the shocked expressions on every single humans' faces. I guess the police weren't expecting to find a robotic-looking super-pony under all that debris...

"Did ya all see where m' friends went?" I asked the nearest officer. After receiving no response, I asked more, "Ya have any idea who coulda' done this, then?" the officer just continued to stare at me in shock...and it was starting to annoy me, "Wha? Meh accen' too diff'rent for ya?" I shook my head, groaning, "Fer-ge' it! I'll fin' em on mah own!"

Not waiting for any of them to overcome the shock of seeing me, I turned and started at a trot for the exit of the tunnel which the assailants took. As I went, though, I started to worry if the police might take action to try and detain me...but, if they did, I'm sure I would be able to evade them or fight them off. This thought in mind, I activated the waypoint beacons Ghost installed into all of our HUDs in case we ever got separated. I swear, that guy is a tracking and technological genius. After a few moments, a dark red waypoint with a distance marking of 30 kilometers appeared on my HUD pointing me to the south...from what I recalled, that would be near the Spartan Training Facility which I received my combat training in with the other ponies...so either we were attacked as part of a training exorcize, which would make sense from Luna's statements, or our assailants are just coincidentally based near home...either way, it's a long walk.

Since all of my experiences towards the Waypoint was nothing but awkward stares of shock and confusion from human pedestrians...I'll recount to you the information I gathered from Artemis and Luna after this whole mess was sorted out...when Artemis first awoke, she was tied to some old wooden chair in a dark room, with Luna in a similar position beside her...

-------------

So I wake-up, ya see, to find myself tied to a chair, in the most uncomfortable position I've EVER been in, I might add, and in some kind of basement, I guess. There was one light overhead, and it would flicker once in a while. Looking around the grimy room, I saw Luna, still unconscious and slumped over, tied to another chair across from me. Growling in anger for seeing her hurt, I looked around the room to find our assailants...but no one was present. Looking behind me as best I could, I tried to see what kind of rope had me tied. It looked like any normal rope...which gave me a very good idea on how to get out of there.

I waited patiently, pondering where my armor went, until a group of four humans entered from a door behind me. They all wore the same outfit: Black leather jacket, jeans, and a rainbow bandana...seriously? A rainbow bandana?...why? Just, why?

"So...who the buck are you chumps?" I asked with nod of my head.

The four all looked to eachother skeptically before turning back to me, the tallest of them stepping forwards, "We are, what the political big-heads would call, Anti-Pont radicals. Meaning, we don't like you...a lot."

I nodded in understanding, "Yeah, I've heard that humans are prejudice bastards. Makes sense."

The three subordinates grumbled angrily. I knew I hit a nerve there. Yet the leader remained calm, "Yes, well, you see...we just don't think having you frilly creatures as allies sets a good example as to our image..." now I gave him the skeptical look, "I mean, we're already fighting-off one of the most powerful armadas in the universe, and having some sugary ponies as allies will definately make us targets for races which are looking for easy targets to obliterate or take over, understand?"

I nodded again, "I see...so why go and capture us two? The ambassador of my race? Seriously? You guys are ganna get in some deep shit for this...in fact, you already are..."

"Hmm? We are already? How so?" the leader asked curiously.

I grinned darkly, "You see...I now realize why I was chosen for this mission." I lowered my head to hide my eyes from their view with my mane, speaking darkly, "You see...I'm, what some may call, a Wolfie...as in, my job in the UNSC, is to rip apart anything, anyone, and anypony, which I wish to die..."

"Tch, a little thing like you? Right." one of three subordinates shouted, enticing laughs.

"You're all lucky I made a promise to not kill anyone."

Without even giving them a second, I kicked the ground with one of my hooves and spun the chair in a 180 degree turn, coming to rest with my back to the four humans.

"What the f-"

As soon as I came to rest, I leaned forwards then bucked my body backwards, pushing offend ground with my hooves as hard as I could. I first collided with their leader, then I pushed through and plowed down the other three. It brought a smile of satisfaction to hear their grunts of pain...

"You!...get off!"

"Kay, one moment." I shook a bit more and rolled off of the pile of men and onto my back hooves, having to bend because of the chair tied to me, "Oh wait! Forgot to do one more thing!" as the four started to get up, I jumped and flipped, coming down with a crash as my chair shattered to pieces upon landing on them. Yeah, my back stung, but I'm sure they hurt more than I did.

Now that I was free, I causally stood back up and brushed myself off, noticing that the four were too sore to move, groaning in pain, "Sugary, Eh?" Leaving those pricks to writhe, I went to Luna and started to untie her, calling her name to wake her, "Luna. Luna! Princess...?" after I untied her, she started to fall forwards, but I caught her and propped her up in my shoulder, sighing, "Tch...heavy sleeper..." I took a breath before shouting in her ear, "OI, PRISS!"

She jolted awake with a start, jumping away from me with a shocked expression. I almost laughed at her wild look and crazy eyes...until she collapsed to the ground after yelping in pain. I ran to her side to find her clutching her right back hoof.

"Luna? Can you manage?"

She took a few calming breaths before staring up at me with a reassuring grin, "What? Just because I'm not a battle hardened soldier like you doesn't mean I can't handle a little pain?"

I rolled my eyes, stepping back while she stood up and brushed herself off, "Fine, fine. Fair enough, missy." I gestured to the four men groaning on the floor behind me, "What should I do with them?"

"Leave them, you've already punished them, it looks like." I shrugged, "So let's just get out of here and go to that Public Meeting, hmm?"

"Righty'o, bossmare."

Luna looked over her shoulder at me after picking up a piece of the broken chair, "Don't...ever say that again, please."

I winked, "No promises...bossmare..." Luna sighed, rolling her eyes and shaking her head in annoyance, "Last one out owes the other a drink!" I shouted, charging past her and almost knocking her over with a laugh.

"Royalty does NOT take bets!..." she shouted after me, "...BUT YOU'RE ON!"