• Member Since 30th Sep, 2015
  • offline last seen Dec 21st, 2016

Truedandere


T

Starswirl the bearded was an extraordinary stallion, who strived to better life in his homeland of Equestria. During an experiment ,whilst trying to find a new, more energy efficient method of teleportation that was open to all races and not just unicorns, he was killed when the portal he had built collapsed behind him, leaving a solid mirror in its place.

Or so the story goes.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 2 )

Overall, it's a good start, and definitely not the cliché type. Trust me, don't use those unless you're joking, or starting with a legend/myth.
Now tracking. :twilightsmile:
Also, you might wanna use the "center" option when you're typing in a timeskip/change in POV like the "Four hours later" in this chapter, 'cause it doesn't look good on a mobile.
Great job on using the apple scraps as a way to describe how Apricot looks, instead of the old-fashioned "throw in a bunch of descriptions when the character pops in" way.

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