Chapter 40
Regal Force thoughtfully stroked his horn as he escorted his son out of the executive suite. The horn thing was a gesture he had picked up at some point. It implied indecision and, indirectly, humility. It put ponies at ease; that was a good enough reason.
“Father, you have to believe me! We really did find Quarrel!” Tourbillon Craft pleaded.
The massive stallion tapped firmly on the decorative pillar. “You know very well video feeds can be faked. Don’t they teach you anything at that school of yours?”
“I’m not lying!” the colt wailed.
“I’m not saying you are.” But I’m thinking it. “You have to understand that your claims will cause massive upheaval. You do know what’s at stake here?”
“Of course! We can return to our original bodies. It’s what you and Mom have waited for this whole time, right?”
Regal nodded, savoring the fruit of his deception.
“I’ll prove it to you when the probe comes back!”
“By all means, prove it.” Regal challenged, gesturing to the door.
The stubborn colt stomped his hooves and trudged away in a funk.
The CEO shut the door on the distraction and relaxed.
“Tourbillon Craft—which one is he again?”
His personal assistant buzzed to life at the rhetorical request as a detailed breakdown appeared in his mind’s eye. Studying the report, the jet-black stallion trotted over to his window-side desk. The quadruped-adapted human antique had quite the history to it, but he never could be bothered to remember it.
“Oh, that one. ‘Crafty.’”
Shame. He had potential at one point, but a tad too scatterbrained. The intellect is there, but too meek—a common pony failing. The more successful stock is more decisive—not that intelligence isn’t appreciated as well.
Regal put his head to the desk and mused, idly studying the urban landscape through the reinforced window. His view wasn’t anything spectacular, but that was fitting. The nature of his position was the first among equals—a trusted steward of his race’s continued growth and prosperity. In the same way, his spartan penthouse didn’t look like much but the rarity of its furnishings was awe-inspiring to a select knowledgeable few.
“Vanity,” he voiced deliberately. “Were I a vain man, it might bother me how I got here.”
Genius? No. Talent? No. He was simply lucky.
He shook himself out of distraction. The kid knew better than to interrupt him at work. Now he couldn’t remember what he had been doing.
Quarrel, huh?
Regal felt a measure of elation.
I’m not seriously thinking he could be telling the truth, am I?
He laughed. “I wish,” he assured himself. “Worse leads with better odds of furthering our cause should be prioritized, of course. Weapons—it’s always about weapons. Even I grow tired of it.”
But getting our bodies back? What a preposterous notion. Not a living soul remembers, but she and I. To think they actually believe I want—that we all want to turn back to 'normal'. Can’t they see that what was once happenstance has become the logical evolution of our race. Before we were caught in a quagmire of bickering factions. Prey animals, on the other hand, can be herded in one direction. They know this—everypony knows this—but as long as they can be sold on the destination, they believe they’re following the path of their own volition.
He chuckled. “What am I posturing for? I’m no demagogue. I just happen to be the only one in this position in history.”
He may have thought the same thing when the board chose him over me…
He savored the unending source of satisfaction. And now she serves solely to warm my bed.
Snapping back to attention, he stole a glance at the elder wood clock.
“Gah, distractions!”
Somehow centuries of stalemate did nothing to dampen the urgency.
Those accursed Arbiters! Acting like they’re higher beings when, in reality, they’re just cowards hiding behind their immunity to heat, energy, radiation, and God knows what else! But cut them, and they die in seconds. Good luck getting that close, though!
He looked at the tablet in front of him, read the report and sighed. “This blockhead again? We tried magic before! Many times.” He skimmed to the bottom and scoffed. “Turn them into ponies? I’ve heard that one before too. It may have even been my idea.”
Regal was at first overcome with amusement upon reaching the end. Somehow it sounded stupider the more he thought about it.
A natural source of anti-magic, huh? If you believe that, I’ve got a magnetic monopole to sell you...
Before I really registered what had happened, Flower Power had subdued the changeling child soldier. I took some pride in the fact that he had been on his last legs as well. I probably would have won if I hadn’t screwed around and hit him full-power before he knew what to expect.
As I pondered this point of bittersweet pride, a small army of guardsponies descended on the empty lot, a bit too late to be useful. Still, they solved the logistical problem of having to carry the little bugpony all across the town.
As I walked back to the castle with the ninja maid leading the way, the conversation was slow to come. After all, somepony I had believed to be one thing was actually a covert operative put in place for my own protection.
“So are there any other secret protectors I should know about?” I asked a tad annoyed, as we trudged through a crowded street.
She shook her head ever so slightly as if afraid the exchange would be overheard.
The mare had donned a robe at some point and carried her weapon openly on her withers, clearly frightening the ponies who wanted to mob the filly alicorn sheepishly trotting behind. Somehow this was a more unsettling brand of silence.
“Um… so, Flower Power?” I asked again.
“Yes?” she asked with a warm charm, in stark contrast to her current appearance.
“Why didn’t Star or any of the others follow me?”
“I saw two River Glades and two Windy Skies exit the schoolhouse, so I knew what I was dealing with,” she explained. “Star understandably stopped looking for you once she saw the first pair at the front gate, so I knew which set I had to follow. I don’t think she was fooled for long, but your opponent made sure to take the most crowded streets.”
“I—I didn’t notice that…” I confessed.
I got the sense that Flower Power knew more than she was letting on. This made me somewhat uncomfortable; after all, this whole time I had no idea there was a hostile faction of shapeshifters.
“So is your cutie mark a fake?” I asked, hoping to diffuse the tension.
“What do you mean?”
“Well yours is just flowers, and—you know—that doesn’t really suggest a ninja, you know?”
She slowed down her brisk pace to accommodate me, or maybe just to formulate her answer.
“What do you think ninjas do?
Alarm bells went off in my head, cautioning me that a slightly careless response would make me sound like a moron. “Well, I mean—I guess it would be stuff like sneaking around and spying and that sort of thing.”
“So what mark would you expect me to have?”
“Like one of those weird words… or like a throwing knife!”
She stopped. I could see that she was trying to be tactful in her response before abruptly given up. “That would certainly help with the sneaking around and spying: a mark that says ‘Hey! Look at me: I’m a ninja!’”
I laughed at my own expense, having failed to heed my brain’s warning.
After we had parted ways, my fatigue flared up again to the point of making me wonder how I had made it as far as I did. I finally made it to my room, glad that Celestia didn’t immediately summon me.
While I sometimes resisted the notion that it had become my home, tonight, its quietude was just what I needed. Or so I thought. As I habitually hopped atop my bed, I grappled with strange insomnia my adrenaline had mutated into. Curiosity, fear, satisfaction, regret all intermingled and pulsed outward.
What do I make of this. What do I make of this?
I dueled a worthy opponent and was on the cusp of victory. As soon as the thought intruded, I resisted it—I wasn’t bothered that I nearly lost. He got lucky that my native mana evaporated as quickly as it did; I got lucky that there was a ninja maid following me around. It all balanced out.
I sighed, as I flattened a crease in my comforter with a forehoof. Considering that my feelings hadn’t gone through such logical hoops, it was unsurprising that rationalizing it failed to cure me.
I rolled on my back and stretched my four legs outward. It was an unladylike position, yet somehow, it seemed to resemble the sort of dramatic posturing that might have suited Rarity. I just knew I was close to unraveling the knot of emotions.
“Am I feeling guilty because I decided to fight?”
I was tempted to bat away the notion. It was honestly a relief to fight at a high level again. I stole a glance at my mirror. Slowly the face I saw had become my own. I hadn’t bothered to trim my eyelashes anymore, yet there were still some holdovers of my time as a colt. Or was I just imagining it? How did I know what ponies thought of as boyish and girlish?
I sighed again, like a total drama queen. I wanted to talk, but Celestia would probably treat me like a traumatized foal—if she weren’t busy interrogating a pint-sized secret agent, that is.
How else can I describe it?
Most of my mental hangups had revolved around my negotiation of all things pony while trying not to lose myself. This conflict felt somehow more distant. It was now plain as day that I could engage with Equestria and not betray my identity.
“So what?” I asked, in a jaded tone that reminded me somewhat of Squirt.
As I mouthed the words, I realized that it wasn’t a trivial question. What did I have? A few bits, the mask from Annuity’s birthday party, physical activities, Bulwark? Games with Squirt? School, homework? Listing it like that made it sound like I spent my days shuffling from one activity to the next, not really committing to anything.
So... What now?
I momentarily dozed off. While I shook myself awake in what felt like an instant, my body seemed lighter and relaxed. The calm I felt was disturbed, however, by his entry.
“Oh, it’s you,” I scoffed. “I thought I was rid of you.”
The brown stallion frowned, but he didn’t complain as he scooted slightly away from me on the bed. “I never went away; it’s just that you don’t seem to need me as much anymore.”
I rolled my eyes. “You said it, not me. So why appear now?”
He scratched his chin. “I thought you might want to talk. I—I heard what you said earlier. I’m not going to force anything on you. Or expect you to change…”
He looked at me expectantly. I glared.
“I didn’t say that; I thought it. Get out of my head.”
His ears drooped in a rather pathetic gesture for an adult. I let him bask in shame for a little bit.
“You wanted to talk to somepony—I know, get out of your head; I’m sorry.”
I admired the unadorned ceiling. “Auburn seems to want me to do filly things. You want me to do pony things. I don’t need either of you, let alone both of you.”
As I looked back at his furry brown muzzle, I observed that he seemed to have found his courage again.
“I’ve never asked you to do anything,” he insisted. “I don’t know—I don’t remember what I am or what I’m doing here, but I want to do good. Maybe I’m your guardian spirit?”
“Pay attention,” I snarked. “I definitely don’t have one of those.”
I expected him to shy away once again, but he maintained non-aggressive eye contact.
“So you’re bored? Or lost?” he gently intoned. “You don’t like pony things that are too silly, right?”
I nodded skeptically. I wasn’t about to take any suggestion he would have, and he appeared to realize this.
“So what do you want to do?” the brown stallion asked. “I know you will find anything I say, suspect.”
“Right,” I chirped. I drummed my hooves expectantly. “So why are you still here?”
He bashfully rubbed his forehooves together while formulating his response. “I—”
“Right. I know: you don’t remember,” I snapped. “Let me know when you figure it out.”
I made the mistake of looking him in the eyes. His eyes weren’t the meek ones of hurt or apologetic ponies, but instead spoke of sincerity. I wasn’t buying it.
“Do you like fighting?” he asked.
I rolled my eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean, all of a sudden?”
He ran his hoof over my bedsheets, absentmindedly trying to flatten the creases. “You don’t have to answer me. It’s just—it seems like you were far more guilty over the Iron Will scuffle your first day here…”
“You really don’t get me, do you?” I asked, aggressively pulling myself closer to him.
He quivered.
I couldn’t tell whether he was just more easily rattled than most ponies, or just a coward. I felt bad for him for a microsecond, but no longer.
“I don’t like hurting others; I don’t love violence. Do you think I really wanted to break that minotaur’s bones? Knock him unconscious?”
He looked down and away. I suppose I was grateful that he didn’t ask a dumb question.
“Put two and two together. A scuffle at a kids’ restaurant. What’s the point of that? I hated that I had to pick that fight!”
He had that dumb look on his face, so I stood up rather unimpressive maximum height and continued.
“I’m in a strange world, and I represent Rhod. If I were to back down or let the minotaur push me around, that doesn’t reflect well on my people.”
“But you didn’t want to?” he asked, meek as ever.
“Of course not.”
A heavy silence seemed to permeate the distorted atmosphere of my room. He looked like he had decided what to say next, but I was feeling lucky. “And if you were going to ask what makes this time different, I can tell you: It was an enormous relief to know I was still good at it—that I was still good at something.
I took a refreshing breath of air. It had felt good to clarify that.
“But! But… you won’t be able to do that much longer…”
“Right!” I said, clearly startling him with my confidence. I preemptively glared at him, somehow knowing his next question.
He shuffled his hooves and scratched his neck. “You can try more pony things, right. Look for your cutie mar—”
“No.” I said decisively
“How about just having fun with other foals? You like soccer, right?”
“Not interested,” I said deliberately with a playful, almost feminine, dismissiveness.
He curved his pathetic expression into something that suggested grit. “Why not? You admitted you have nothing to do! Or are you just going to not do it to spite me? That’s more childish than anything else!”
Somehow seeing him show some spine incensed me. “Do you think I’m that STUPID!? That SHALLOW!?”
My eyes snapped open as my angry rebuke echoed off the walls. He was gone.
“A dream? Of course. What else?” Still, I double-checked my surroundings to make sure nothing was out of place.
“Is reverse psychology what that loser is trying to do? Well, I’ll still show him.”
I smirked. I wasn’t about to go back to the unhappy existence of resisting everything pony. At the same time, I wasn’t about to dive into the silly and childish. And I think I knew just what to do.
I dragged my hooves along the bumpy white stone of a Canterlot sidestreet. My gait showed my disappointment and caused me to fall considerably behind my companion, who circled back regularly to check on me.
“What’s wrong?” the stout earth pony asked. “I didn’t think you’d be that disappointed.”
I sighed. “I guess I was trying to get away from the princess stuff for a little while, but—you know. Thanks anyway for coming with me, Bulwark.”
“Sure thing. Still, I’m a little surprised: I never heard that princesses had to be confirmed by the legislature!”
I stopped abruptly. “They don’t. Celestia told me it’s a silly thing the congressponies do to feel important. It has no bearing on my status. I just wish they hadn’t confiscated my ring to let everypony know I was the new alicorn.”
Bulwark seemed to be searching for some comforting words as she studied the ground. “Well, it’s not like the stuff they were talking about before was any more interesting.”
I studied the Vermillion filly, who smiled warmly when we locked eyes. She was definitely trying to make me feel better.
“I actually liked the boring stuff, though,” I admitted. “I went to the House of Ponies because it’s the least silly pony thing I could think of. I was hoping for some inspiration.”
“I think I’m generally less silly than average myself, but why is that concerning for you? I know a lot of silly ponies that I like!”
I slowly shook my head.
“It’s like I told you earlier: I’m getting younger, since my magical signature is messed up. I didn’t want to do silly, childish things because I want to feel like something of an adult still.”
I froze for a second before assuming a poker face.
Bulwark paused for a moment to contemplate. “That makes sense, I suppose. You don’t want to become childish too quickly.”
Good. It doesn’t look like she noticed my slip-up.
“Can you explain to me what exactly is happening with your age, or will I have to wait a little bit more for you to divulge those details?” She asked innocently. “The way you’re describing it, it sounds like a curse.”
Her saying it like that made it seem a bit artificial, but it was what I was comfortable with. Then again, I reasoned I could spare a few more details.
“My magical signature didn’t age because I was disconnected from Harmony.”
Bulwark let out a shrill gasp. “That’s horrible!”
I assembled my words to parry that characterization, but I decided to moderate my reaction after actually considering it. “The truth is I’m not sure it was such a bad thing. I lived my life normally for so long, never missing it. But it meant my magical signature never aged.” I looked back at her and frowned as we locked eyes. “I’m sorry, you’re the first one I’ve ever explained this to. It sounds far-fetched when I actually hear myself saying it.”
Bulwark wanted to inquire further, judging by her perky ears and general expression, but she read the mood well. “So… you want to get ice cream or something? I know a good place nearby that has just what I like. I’d like to see you try it.”
I do owe her, and that doesn’t sound too bad. But...
“Sorry, I can’t,” I murmured. “I’m going through a sort of tough time where I’m trying to sort through who I am anymore, and what I should be doing. Will I slowly change into a normal toddler, or will I wake up one morning and be changed all at once? It’s more about what I can do, actually. I can’t stop it, but how do I keep feeling like I’m me. Sorry, it’s a dumb excuse, but what I’m feeling is just too heavy for ice cream.”
Bulwark was disappointed, but then she smiled. “Thanks for confiding in me. It’s not dumb at all. About what you should be doing, I have a suggestion.”
I beamed. “Really!?”
I was then hit by my realization of illogical Equestrian logic. “Oh…”
My companion looked slightly hurt by my reaction.
I put my hoof on her barrel—since I couldn’t reach her withers, and stroked her. “No wait, it’s not you. It’s just that I've noticed that whenever I set out to do something, I am usually met with two comically-inclined dead ends before the third actually leads to a worthwhile development. Since I wasn’t allowed to use my magic ring to hide my wings, we had the ‘princess is here’ shenanigans in the audience section.”
Bulwark chuckled. “You have to admit it was kind of funny when the congressponies kept flip-flopping as they gauged your reaction.
“That part wasn’t so bad,” I admitted.
“And it was cute when the colt next to you tried to get your autograph.”
I waved a hoof dismissively—a habit of uncertain origin.
“It wasn’t all bad, but when they made it all about me, it stopped being fun. I wish they hadn’t decided to move that up on the agenda.”
Bulwark nodded. “I saw on the way in that it was already on the schedule, but I get your point.” I saw her eyes light up as she connected the dots. “Oh, so you’re saying you think my idea won’t work because it’s the second attempt?”
“Exactly,” I chirped, appreciative somepony could assure me my theories weren’t crazy.
“How about I whisper it to you. That might help.”
“Why would that—”
She smiled and shushed me. “Trust me.”
I knocked.
“Come in,” Celestia said serenely.
I poked my nose through the door and cautiously slid in. “Hi. Do you have time?”
“Of course. I’m sure you have a lot to talk about from yesterday—the attempted kidnapping, your secret protector, the motivation of the plot, the nature of your opponent—which do you want to discuss?”
“Actually, I want a job," I squeaked.
Her eyes went wide in curiosity-flavored surprise.
“Yeah, that’s right,” I said, firm, as I unglued my eyes from Celestia’s fur-like rug to make eye contact.
I could see Celestia considering a couple of possibilities behind her patient eyes, before finding one satisfactory and re-focusing her gaze.
In the short time she was absent, I had undertaken a comparison between her room and Luna’s, but I then realized I had only seen Luna’s office. This reminded me of the significance of the princess seeing the friendship students here instead of in her office.
“I see... so Squirt got you into the more expensive games?”
“What? No, this isn’t about the money. I already don’t know what to do with the bits you give me. If you’re going to make me say it, I will: I want to feel useful.”
Celestia moved closer to me and sat down. “What prompted this? I mean, you’re not a burden by any means, but I suppose—”
As she paused to formulate her response diplomatically, I had to restrain myself from just cutting to the chase and saying “I’m bored!” That sort of childishness was, fortunately, something I could still restrain.
Celestia took another three seconds, apparently skeptical of her own idea. “I guess there is some filing I could have you do…”
I couldn’t tell if she was kidding.
“Done.”
“What? No! Your time is precious. I can’t have you use leftovers from school and homework doing menial tasks for me.”
I posed, ready to counter. But my mane ruined it by falling over my eyes.
I really need to cut that at some point.
“You really need to cut that at some point,” said the Princess.
“Thanks,” I made myself murmur unenthusiastically before gathering my thoughts. “I don’t have anything else to do. It’s amazing how fast homework can go when there’s nothing to look forward to after. Look: I know I can’t keep exerting myself physically with my body how it is. There’s only so much I can compensate for.”
Celestia gestured with her horn in a manner I didn’t understand. “About that, I have a proposal: you promise not to do it again, and I spare you the stern lecture about attempting to foil your own foalnapping.”
“Done.”
I could have argued that Star could have been behind me. After all, it was pretty clever that the real Windy Skies had been with someone who had assumed my form, but I knew a good deal when I had one.
“While we’re on the subject of mischief, did you enjoy your day playing hooky?”
It hit me like a low-hanging branch. “Ponyfeathers! I forgot all about school. How could I do that?”
Celestia turned on a disarming smile. “You’re fine. I notified the school. Though I have to admit: you’re the first to ditch school to watch the House of Ponies debate live.”
“Can you appreciate that I’m bored now?” I coyly intoned.
Princess Celestia cocked her head to the side, apparently intrigued. “Would you be willing to help the other friendship students?”
My distaste must have been visible.
She backtracked.
“You don’t have to, but it could help you learn something about yourself. You never know.”
“Isn’t that sort of what I already did with the Cutie Mark Crusaders?” I countered, trying to refuse indirectly.
She pounced. “Did it work?”
“Uh...ummm… the first two didn’t really—but that’s beside the point! Aren’t you just passing off your job on me?”
“You weren’t opposed to me doing that earlier with the filing.”
I pouted. Was she always this good, or am I losing my edge?
“We both know I’m not excited by the concept. I’m actually looking for something that’s not overly silly or overly… pony.”
For a short, tense moment, I was praying she wouldn’t ask me to elaborate.
“Alice, in some ways I’m at as much of a loss as you are. You already admitted that physical tasks aren’t doable anymore. A creative task probably wouldn’t be to your liking either.”
“Yeah, I do enough imagination-ing at school. How about something cerebral? ” I proposed. “Not trying to sound arrogant or anything…”
Celestia took a moment to weigh her words before responding. “Alice, you’re smart enough, but you’re not going to design a bridge, manage a supply chain, or codify government regulations better than the ponies I have doing those things right now.”
I remained silent—a tacit admission that she was right.
“That only leaves the social…” she concluded. “Incidentally, we’ve gone through the four categories of camp activities.”
She was so diplomatic that it must have rubbed off on me, as I carefully considered how to rebuff her politely.
“For the sake of argument, let’s say I’m open to the idea. What makes me more qualified to coach friendship students than design a bridge? Other than what’s on my head and back!”
Celestia paused to think, so I took my turn to pounce. “I mean, I can’t follow Squirt and Bulwark everywhere, but it just occurred to me that if I get a few more ponies like that, I can split my time between them, so I wouldn’t need something new “
“So your proposal is… to make more friends?”
I scowled. “Well, I—uh….”
Really set myself up for that one.
I heard a welcome knock on the door.
“Come in,” Celestia said, unsurprised when Star Chart came with a booklet in her mouth.
She dropped it in front of me. “Here are your activity choices, Alice,” she said with playful cheer.
“All right, let’s see how much I’m going to regret this…”
Celestia made soft eye contact. “Think about it, okay?”
“Okay…” I said, sedated. Shaking it off, I turned my attention to my activity list. “Not bad. Not too bad I guess. I can do that. Hey, they chose something I actually like—what are the odds?” I froze. “Okay, that one’s ridiculous! I told them they could pick anything, but I’m pretty sure I can’t do that”
Celestia had a mischievous look on her face. “You can technically change your mind still. It hasn’t been signed off on yet…” a regal seal crept up over the booklet. “But now it has!”
I rolled my eyes. But a more pressing matter came to the forefront of my mind. “That’s right! Cake Slice wanted to piggyback on my activities. I gotta go!”
I put the booklet in my mouth and galloped off, noting that Star had disappeared at some point.
Good thing that they gave me two green activities. I’m pretty sure Cake Slice can’t copy me in one of them.
I flailed my front-hooves, mid-leap, as I reached for the fleeing tail so tantalizingly within reach. Making one last swipe, I managed to pull a couple of hairs. The colt let out a yelp from my sudden yank and slowed enough for me to get a second, indisputable, hoof on victory.
I registered some cheers. My lungs were begging for mercy, to such an extent that it overshadowed my triumph. In an abstract sense, my endurance was slightly better for being an alicorn, but considering I had to do more with less muscle mass, it was basically a wash.
“She did it!”
“Three cheers for River!”
“We won! We actually won!”
I smiled despite struggling to stay on my hooves. My mind was locked in chasing the thrill of the moment. As my focus unraveled I became conscious of the smell of grass.
Daybreak turned to face me and nodded in a stoic, manly way, admitting I had caught and bested him at tag.
Kind of strange he can still look so tough with those warm colors. I suppose that’s not abnormal; it’s like what makes those Junior Royal Guard stallions look so tough
“Yeah, it’s so much funner when Annuity’s not cheating!” Sunny Style chirped.
I looked around at my vanquished foes. Despite being a mixture of Annuity’s posse and nicer ponies, they were bunched together in the aftermath for some reason. My view of them was then obscured as my own team surrounded me in a blanket of multicolored fur. I half-expected them to pick me up and carry me, which would have been a bizarre experience.
Bear hugs would have been one thing, but I felt a static charge build in my fur as some of the foals rubbed my fur for some reason. Ponies tended to casually touch each other more than humans, but my classmates took every opportunity to feel “royalty.”
Fizzle whistled. “All right, class, back inside.”
Audible groans of protest filled the air as the crowd slowly filed back into the classroom. I sighed in relief as the heat of close proximity dissipated. My head hung low from exhaustion and I intentionally dragged my hooves to get some time for myself. However, it was not to be.
I looked up at the sight of hooves. My satisfied smile dropped before I could even look up. “What do you want, Annuity?”
She looked surprisingly meek. “D—did Princess Celestia say anything else about me?”
At first, I missed the point, given Annuity’s general haughtiness. Then I remembered the hoofball game we saw together.
“No.” I taunted her with a measured laconic dismissal, seasoned with knowing confidence. I enjoyed watching her face stretch and wrinkle as she grew flustered.
“What do you mean, ‘no? Are you saying you won’t tell me!? You think that because she deputized or princestized you that I am at your whim!” Apparently, she had defaulted back to irritable. “I know how you think of me! You think you can reform me like some kind of villain as Princess Twilight does!?”
“Yes.”
It took a lot of effort not to burst out laughing at the face she made in response to that.
“Oh, so it’s that you’re worried about,” I said after an awkward pause, perhaps taking pity on her.
She looked crestfallen all of a sudden. ”I know you hate me and all, but”—I saw Fizzle impatiently goad us inside.
“I don’t hate you,” I said turning my back on her as I hopped inside the little red schoolhouse.
She let out a confused gasp.
“In fact, I don’t think about you much at all.”
I knew I couldn’t look back without tainting my cool aura, but I would have loved to see what face she made in response to that.
As I settled in, Fizzle wasted no time in starting the Prench lesson. In a typical fashion, she went around the room quizzing us on verb conjugation.
“Je ___”
“Prends.”
“Vous ___”
“Prenez.”
“Elle ___”
“Prend,” I answered. I did have to wonder what the point was of practicing the singular conjugations orally when they all shared the same pronunciation. But then again, I wasn’t the teacher.
Prench was a bit boring, but my impatience was tempered by the realization that math wasn’t much to look forward to either.
I don’t understand. Learning Equish—or Lucens, rather—was so easy! Fifteen minutes a day and we were all fluent. Two hours a week of Prench and we’re still doing baby stuff! Did we ever even need to learn to conjugate verbs? It was so easy then!
“Vous ____”
“Prendrez?” said Pink Diamond.
“No, Pink. Prendre is an irregular -re verb. Although, what you said is actually the future tense. We haven’t learned that yet.”
Annuity was snickering.
I shot her a look.
She clamped her maw, and her ears drooped.
There are perks to this alicorn thing after all!
The final bell rang, and I stood up at my desk and stretched like a cat. For a blissful moment, I thought I was done for the day.
The gaggle of smiling foals encircling my desk begged to differ.
I sighed. Why did I have to do this?
A ripple of malaise flowed through me.
No, that’s wrong. That’s what I’ve been doing wrong. I’m not going to complain about everything anymore!
I took another gander at my procession, and a different knot of emotion snared me. I couldn’t exactly expect to suddenly like this princess charade.
“Okay, Sunny Style. What would you like advice with?”
I can at least listen.
She giggled. “Oh, I don’t want advice. I just wanted to ask if I could cut your mane. It’s getting kind of gnarly, and I thought I could pretty it up.”
I did my best not to react negatively, but my real feelings must have shone through.
She batted her eyelashes pleadingly.
“Sure.” I may have needed to justify it after the fact, but I wasn’t too unhappy with the outcome. If she could save me a trip to the castle beautician, it would be for the best.
She clapped her hooves and scurried away happily.
Well that’s one.
“River?” a couple of foals said at once.
“Oh, right. Umm… I choose you.”
“About time you pick me!” Gilded Acres said haughtily. “I don’t know how you go about picking ponies!”
The crowd murmured their agreement.
I thought about defending myself—after all, I had been systematic to give each pony their chance. I thought better of saying so.
“So do you want to take your turn, or are you just going to complain?” I asked in my best imitation of Celestia. Somehow I couldn’t manage to soften scolding words as she could.
She timidly looked at the cubbies after being called out. She was silent just long enough to make me feel a little bad and start to wonder if I should apologize, but she had pride.
“I wouldn’t ask you for just anything since you probably don’t like me so much. But you would know something about this,” she said with a full mouth as she relayed me a stack of papers. I thought I recognized it.
“Not this again… “You missed the boat if you wanted to piggyback and—this… isn’t for camp,” I said, voice trailing off as I realized my error. I waited for GIlded to say something indignant, but she allowed me just to read. “These are sales projections?”
“Some records from my family business,” Gilded corrected. “My parents let me manage the supply chain for some small family farms. It went well at first, but production is down. My allowance depends on it, but I’m kinda stumped.”
My first reaction was that this was easily the strangest request I had gotten as a pseudo-princess. I wanted to question her belief that I could actually help, but—
Wait a minute! Wasn’t I just asking for a job? This may be the best chance. After all, there’s nothing wacky about it.
“I mean if you don’t want to do it, I wouldn’t expect you to be abl—”
“I’ll do it,” I announced, disarming the skeptical filly with a warm smile.
She habitually combed her poofy gold mane. “Well, start with the top page, I suppose.”
Without further adieu, I picked up the first page. It was an executive summary of the overall numbers of the operation. The numbers were rather impressive, compared to my allowance at least. Then I realized the operation was a net negative. Curious, I turned the pages for something I could understand. I didn’t understand the mathematical terms used for evaluation purposes, but I honed in on what I did understand and flipped back and forth between pages.
On the periphery of my awareness, I registered my fan club beginning to disperse.
Near the end I noticed there were more words and fewer numbers, so I invested extra time in that section. Once finished, I turned my attention back to Gilded, who was shuffling impatiently.
“I think I may see something.”
“About time…” she murmured.
I wasn’t that long, was I?
I stared blankly through Gilded; it was kind of funny that she was framed by the leaves painted on the wall, which were a similar color to her fur. I realized I was stalling somewhat with this distraction, and when I realized as much, I pushed past my doubts and cleared my throat.
“You’re done?” Gilded asked, impatient.
“Yeah, from what I can see, tomato production is down in the Western Outskirts, while there’s been a lot of crop destruction in the areas near Hemville.”
My petitioner scowled. “It took you that long to point out something obvious? This type of thing is what my cutie mark’s for.”
A few of Annuity’s group had stayed behind and had a cheap laugh at my expense.
“I’m not done,” I assured her, defensive. “I think the trick is to manage the supply chain so that the Hemville produce is shipped more frequently. You may not be able to increase your inventory, but you can charge a premium for freshness.”
Gilded nodded, but not necessarily in encouragement.
“Oh, and in the west, cabbage and corn production are doing great. So if you can convince those growers to shift their fields away from tomatoes, you’ll do much better.”
The green earth filly regarded me kindly—more than I had ever seen from her. “Those are good ideas. Better than I thought you’d do. I came up with the same thing, but it’s no good. Hemville doesn’t like the frequent traffic of our operation, so we can’t do more than once a week. As for the other, we can’t exactly tell ponies what to plant.”
I think I’m getting closer. I thought. Then again, she’s probably looked at this too.
“Umm… this might be obvious, and you could be testing me, but don’t you have remedies written into your agreements?”
I heard some soft cheers.
“You mean those documents in the back?” Gilded asked, carefully weighing her words.
“Exactly!” I chirped, cloaking my uncertainty with enthusiasm. I flipped the pages. “This agreement stipulates that Hemville’s supply runs will be established with minimal inconvenience, using an impartial party using a “reasonable grower” standard. I can only guess what that means, but they should let your carts through maybe every other day instead. There’s also some discussion of what you can do to make it less intrusive on the small town.”
Gilded was in disbelief. “I didn’t understand any of that boring stuff!”
Enjoying her reaction, I continued my attack. “For which crops to plant your options are a bit more limited. You can call a mediator to make your agreement work better for the both of you, or you can even submit it for binding arbitration. I don’t think that will be necessary, though. There are micromanagement incentives. Sort of like you tell them what to plant for an extra cut of the profits.
“I can’t pay that rate for entire farms’ production!” Gilded protested.
“I don’t think you have to,” I explained patiently. “You see, if they really are better off prioritizing certain crops, they’ll earn more, too. You don’t have to force them if it will help them too.”
Gilded seemed to have a momentary fit, but her expression slowly brightened the more she thought about it. “I will have to consider it. Thank you.”
She cleared her throat and galloped off. I anticipated unwarranted applause from my supporters, but they simply looked perplexed. Enjoying the quietude this reaction offered, I trotted outside to meet with Star.
We took the usual route back to the Castle, passing the quaint general store, the pet store, and a tailor of some renown. It all began to blend together at some point. I might have even started to hum an improvised tune, but I clamped my jaw shut in an instant, for fear some passerby might join in. The last thing I needed was for my own good mood to snowball into a group performance.
“Hmm… I wonder why Bulwark turned me down. It was her idea…”
“Oh?” Star intoned.
“She was the one who invited me for ice cream on Friday, but when I offered to go on the weekend, she blushed and changed the subject.”
“Ah, the mysteries of a mare’s heart!” Star taunted.
I skidded to a halt, barely avoiding a collision with a wooden post that supported a cabbage seller’s shade. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
She playfully whipped me with her tail. “If you don’t remember, I’m sure Rarity would be happy to give you a refresher. And now that you’re Canterlot’s most eligible little bachelorette, there are tons more to teach you.”
I made a sour face at her half-heartedly. I thought I had a comeback ready, but I drew a blank.
“You seem to be in a good mood,” Star observed, tactfully changing the subject.
“Yeah! I don’t know what it is, but I’m fine. Maybe I’ve gotten used to the princess treatment. Or maybe—I’m not really a child or anything, but certain things aren’t as scary as I thought!”
Star studied my eyes for clues; even I didn’t understand the thought process churning behind them. Just before it became awkward, Star pulled her gaze away and pretended to study the commemorative mural on the wall of the community center.
“What do you mean? You don’t really mean you’re feeling fear?” Star asked warmly.
“I guess I realized that I can try things. If I really hate something I can always back out. Like, I helped Gilded Acres out today, and it was kinda fun. Now that I think about it, if Squirt had asked me early on to play games with him, I probably would have said no. But hanging out with him eased me into the idea.” I paused for a moment of consternation. “Although, I can’t exactly say yes to everything. My time is suddenly a valuable commodity, so I guess it could hurt to be too open-minded.”
Star smiled.
“You know something?” I demanded.
“No, but I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”
I sighed and looked up at the expansive wide sky. What was once an alien view was now inviting. Maybe the hospitality of this world had finally won me over. Or perhaps the pegasus part of me simply yearned for flight.
I wonder how they’re doing at home. Perhaps Diane was thinking like me when she chose to live amongst those bears—the Ayabna.
“Was Rhod ever in any danger?” I asked aloud.
“Pardon?” Star asked, perplexed.
“Nothing big,” I said softly. “It wasn’t my choice, but I felt I had left Rhod behind in a time of need. And then did abandon her, for abandoning me—for abandoning what I believed in. But it’s like I’ve said, change doesn’t have to mean taking a sledgehammer to the status quo.”
“Well said,” Star lauded, with genuine pride.
Yes, Rhod may not need to be saved by me, after all.
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There is no need for doubt. At least I think that you did great.
Interesting to see that their is a lot more then one other foreign elements in the Equestrian plain and looks like they were around for a long while still, it almost reminded me of 3rd rock from the sun for some strange reason. Well look's like Alice is taking better charge of her situation and it was nice to see that she was taking an administration role. the stallion was interesting to see again and to see that he really is a lot more powerless then we might have first thought.
Here's a little correction for the Prench part rather common. "You", in French, can be translated as "tu", the 2nd person of the singular, and as "vous", the second person of the plural. So it gives:
je prends -> I take
tu prends -> you take
il/elle prend -> he/she takes
nous prenons -> we take
vous prenez -> you take
Maybe... a smoke bomb beside a wakizashi? Or maybe something like... This?
https://www.jing.fm/clipimg/detail/161-1614633_monkeyfu-s-cutie-mlp-ninja-cutie-mark.png
images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/30300000/Caps-Lock-my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic-30376085-750-563.jpg
Oooo! I love it. Put Annuity in her place.
10030809
Ya Alice is really in her element when she can exercise her mental faculties to the benefit of others. She has a brilliant mind for administration and as much she worried about losing herself in pony land. I think she is still herself just different, no one is the same after changes in life not even if she had stayed in her original body. Change is inevitable, you just have to go forward with yourself in mind and be comfortable with your own choices.
it sounds like our new little princess is growing in too the idea.
i like this chapter lots of fun times.
I’m still waiting until it gets down to business. I’ve been waiting for 40 chapters now.
10030664
10030809
I'm glad I accomplished my main goal for the chapter.
10030993
I may just be dense, but I don't get what you're getting at exactly. Can you quote the mistake for me?
10031328
He was intended to perturb Aron/Alice. All I'm hoping is for some redeeming qualities to come through.
10031484
I was hoping that point of debate would be an entertaining exercise, but it seems that it's done nothing but ignite controversy.
10035030
I suppose I've been stingy with sudden developments. Or maybe I just come up with too many scenes that strike me as fun. I don't know.
10039563
(It's from the part in the school, where they learn Prench) Instead of "vous prenez", you must put "tu prends". They both translate to "you take", but "tu prends" is the singular, while "vous prenez" is the plural.
10039883
Oh, I see what you're getting at. Instead of proceeding in the conventional order (Je, tu, il/elle/on, nous, vous, ils/elles), I had Fizzle quiz them randomly. Still probably shouldn't have mixed it up more instead of using "vous" twice.
10042316
Oh, ok. I thought that she was questioning them following the order but that you got 'tu' and 'vous' mixed.
It's taken him this long but he's finally going native. Truly. This is usually the part where I drop the story, but like a Starscribe fic, I've committed too much time to just not see it through.
Ok, how many individuals are in these two sentences? Is the person the board chose now a female? I am not sure if you are being vague on purpose or accidentally. I have no clue who is being talked about but I feel there is important history here.
10068561
If you're confused, that's definitely my bad. I tend to overestimate others' ability to follow my mad contortions and leaps of logic. Since the pony gender ratio is slightly off, the old CEO got shafted, and his hostile second-in-command forced the changed mare into marriage.
10098920
I appreciate the kind words. I suppose I might have also doubted my ability to provide exposition to Aron that the readers already know in a way that's interesting. I also thought that it might turn into a 3-day seminar covering everything from Nightmare Moon to weather factories. I'm sure there'd be ways to do that well, though.
10108243
Ok, so there was a forced gender change. That wasn't super clear with just a change in pronouns used.
hmm that picture for the story and that pony in the background like mmm that's my honey
I wonder if River will become the Alicorn of Law or something, seems to have an interest in that sort of thing.
Celestia: "you need to make more friends!"
10108243
Yeah, we were slightly confused, as it sounds like the mass transformations happened recently instead of a millenia ago...
Maybe River should call that brown Stallion, Doctor or uncle brown.
Yeah about that