Life up north is hard. It's cold, mountainous, and snows half the year. It takes a special pony to endure such a vital job as being the life blood that keeps the national economy going and food in their mouths. Axle Steel has spent the last seven years of his life in the Neighagra Division driving low speed drag freight. Along with a young inexperienced firepony, a boisterous brakepony, an overworked conductor, and the many others who work the road, they all share a common passion. To see their trains run. They know no other life and want none.
Chapters (1)
I like it, railroading in heat is not easy, but I've never done it in cold.
6429885 I can see your points on narrative having problems. I agree it could stand improvement in places, but some of it is by design. There really isn't meant to be a grand arc, though multi-chapter arcs may come up in the future. I'm not discounting your suggestions by any stretch since some transitions are jarring and I have a bad habit of dumping lots of information because I love world building and facts. Probably why Tom Clancy is my favorite author.
As for not ponifying the setting... I hadn't actually considered that. And now that you mention it, I see exactly what you're saying. In most cases I could picture ponies twisting their hooves to conform to provide a limited amount of the range of dexterity humans have as other fanfics have on this site. It is a good point and one that's actually really starting to concern me.
I do appreciate your input since I've had so little feedback thus far and hope that I can improve.
6431132 Partly this is my own memories of going to college in upstate New York where I used to take the train back home to Maryland. That kind of weather is something you never forget. Glad you're enjoying it and appreciate the comment.
A very well written story, and I would love to see it be continued. You obviously have a great graps for railroading and how crews will act and react to their environment, which makes for great story telling.