• Member Since 23rd Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen Dec 2nd, 2020

Thespurgin


Still not much to say... Dang.

T
Source

It is three months after the Royal Wedding, and normalcy has returned to Equestria... for the most part. Pinkie is the same old Pinkie, Rainbow Dash is still addicted to the Wonderbolts, Rarity is still trying to learn Prench... but for Twilight, things are not the same. Ever since the Wedding, she's noticed an almost unnoticeable distance from her friends and from Celestia. This alone would be enough to bother her, but to make matters worse, she has been tormented by a dream that she cannot remember and physically cannot rest for fear of.

The tension is building, and something is bound to snap. If you've felt death and loneliness... what would you do to keep your loved ones from suffering the same fate?


Hello, this is your author speaking.
I know you're anxious to get to reading the story with the cryptic description would just like to point out a couple things before you get reading.

First of all, this is my first MLP fanfic, and it is set as an AU beginning just after the S2 finale, so I would appreciate constructive criticism. Not flaming or silent downvotes; give me criticism!
Secondly, it is important to understand that the AU tag seen above possesses two meanings. Not only is it an AU in the literal sense as it utilizes my own expansive worldcanon (dubbed Nidus) but in addition to that, it is an AU in that it does not accept the events of season three as canon. This is due to it chronologically beginning only 3 months after season two. The events of season three may appear, but they will likely be warped.
Lastly, I need to point out that I will probably be editing the tags and characters as this story goes. This being my first story, I'll need time to get a handle on the nuances of the submission system.
Thirdly, Please tell me if any of the fonts I use in the story go wrong. There are bound to be a few errors even with my prereading, so if you find them do say something.
Finally, I'd like to thank RoseyTail for her permission to use this marvelous image as my cover.

Thank you, and enjoy the story of Dark Horizons.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 45 )

Alright, first chapter is up! Nice start, leaves just enough of curiosity for me to favorite it and wait for further updates. :raritywink: Eagerly awaiting for the continuation. :twilightsmile:

658626 Well, I'm an admittedly slow writer, but I'll see what I can do!

I am intrigued. It's vague enough to leave one curious, yet specific enough to point in a general direction. So far I like it, but I'll reserve further judgement when we get some more information.

On the technical side, I have to applaud. It is very well written and flows seamlessly.

You've set up a high standard with this one, I'll expect you to stick with it. No pressure though.

Only thing left to say is that I'll be waiting for more.

659852 No pressure right? It's not like I've written two fanfics before this that I never finished.

659924
Oh, in that case; have the pressure. All of it. Finish this thing, or I'll hunt you if you don't. (Wee I'm helping!)

704757 Thank you! I'll try to maintain the quality of the story as it goes, but do forgive me if something happens. As I've said before, this amounts to a firstfic for me.

Hmmm...I think I have a pretty good idea where this is going, and it's gotten my interest.. Congratluations, good sirrah, you've earned a favorite.

844261 oh do you now? I am interested. Try me. PMs if you please, so there are no spoilers for the rest of my meager audience. I need some kind of amusement to get me back into the swing of this thing.

Also, to everyone else, I AM in fact still working on this, but I have had some terrible writer's block and only just managed to acquire a job in sales, which taken together means it may be some time before I manage to pull the next chapter of this sucker. Do forgive the delay. I hate it as much as you do.

interesting... but there is barely any info here!!!
I WANT MORE!!! :flutterrage:

come on... please... :fluttershysad:

anyhow, good start, im wondering how she will deal with this nightmare that is so unnerving, and enemy you cannot defeat... thats gotta suck...

920537 I swear I'm still working on this sucker. But the dialogue is proving to be a pain in the -:flutterrage:- and I've been juggling this with work and a number of other projects. Thanks for the fav BTW.

Interesting so far. :twilightsmile:

But, one little tidbit...

Ponies have hooves, not feet.

Okay, so I spent WAY to much time on this chapter, but I think it came out rather well. As for my three preferred prereaders, I do apologize for not giving you the link to this sooner. I promise to do so with the next one, and to work harder on it, though considering I'll be getting a job soon and am working on another fic, in addition to all my other projects, still leaves this story pretty low on my priority list.

You know how to change that though. All I need is people interested in me working on it!

In other notes, yes this chapter was a pain to write. First time actually trying to get the girls' characters right. How do you think I did?

Also, before anyone asks, yes this is just the beginning. Twilight, why you so crazymad?

This may be one of the most explicit examples of extreme escalation of tension that I have read in fanfiction yet. I felt as if the combination of all of the scenes in this chapter really hit home in terms of driving emotion forward. The gradual ramping of stress on Twilight was well paced, and they all played very well of of one another in terms of reactions. I didn't see any glaring or even less obvious mistakes, but I do have a bit of a peeve - the paragraphs are not indented at all. That, and you had trouble with starting a new paragraph each time someone else speaks. Otherwise, it was very solid. The first chapter greatly interested me, but this chapter has ensured that I will eagerly await the next chapter. Don't worry about how long it takes you to post the chapter, though; good things take time.

1038115 I'm sure I said this before, but fixed.

1238473 Sorry about the paragraphs... I'll consider changing it if I get enough requests, but otherwise I don't see much of a point. Yes, I know I have issues with paragraph changing according to the speaker, and I'm working on that. As is, I THINK I got all of the issues with Chapter 2.

As for the next chapter, I'll try to do it in less time than the 3 months it took me for this one. It starts REALLY picking up in chapter 4.

......Don't take too long with the next one!!!! I NEED MOAR!!!!! :flutterrage:

1239468 What gave you that crazy idea? :trollestia:

Good work my friend. Some things I didn't expect from you, others I was surprised to see you do so well. I think this will turn out to be a really great first fan fic. :twilightsmile:

1243747 First? I would have thought you of all people would remember my previous attempts at fiction. Remember Nocturne of Shadow and Chaotic Universe?

1245217 But those aren't MLP are they? I was just talking about in the MLP universe.

MOAR i say, MOAR!!

twilight snapped, then broke down, and is now falling apart... yeah this is going to be interesting. i loved the random "no silly, i didn't come through the door, i came through the bathtub." totally pinkie pie.

next chapter, i await you!!

1239364 I swear I'm still working on it. I swear! I've just been busy with other projects and work and stuff! You WILL get another chapter. On my honor as a Gold Member! (whatever the heck that is, and why ever I am one.)

2355797 I don't know why I am one eather, but needless to say GOLD TEAM RULES!!!
Oh and yay!:yay:

2357699 eh, it's April 1st. Answer acquired.

Now... I'm only at 3500 words for the next chapter, but it's starting to come along. Just give me some time and I'll get to the good stuff. I had no idea I could spend 3000 words doing nothing but talk and thought and still make a chapter plausible.

Holy crap, somepony finally chewed out Pinkie Pie.

...Awesome.

3790609 you'd think they'd have learned their lesson from the episode with pinkie's birthday...
and I'm sorry I haven't done more with this. It's been a pain to write anything, let alone a fic I half-abandoned due to writer's block.

It's irritatingly hard for me to mock up anything more than a one-shot.

3792290

All things considered, Twilight finally snapping after a week without sleeping, plus the shit she had to put up with at the wedding, is kind of warranted. True, Spike was the innocent victim here, but all of this could have been avoided had Pinkie Pie acted normally, instead of a hyperactive manchild with ADHD.

I've always believed that for all her charm, Pinkie is absolutely shit at picking up social cues. Just look at Cranky Doodle Donkey.

3795879 you'd think she'd have learned something from that...

Please continue this so far this is amazing and you enthralled me in a mere two chapters hope you update this soon.

Comment posted by Thespurgin deleted Jan 17th, 2015

5488524
I kind of lost track where I was going with this, so I'm likely to cancel it soon and/or take it down altogether, though I'm not averse to reimagining the story. I have the doc for it's development in my library, so it's simply a matter of finding the plot the story needs.

5515966 Please don't cancel this fic:pinkiesad2:. This was one of the first fics I read on this site apart from the huge fics like the nyx-verse and the quiet place; you probably have your own ideas on how this should continue (if you plan on continuing it) and I would be happy with whatever you do with it, but when I read this I started writing the end in my head (as I am wont to do) just so it could have some completion and I could move on. It was really strange and involved Twilight training with, then inevitably fighting, Chrysalis in order to save both their races. In the end Chrysalis was turned into a filly with no knowledge of her time as a queen and Twilight took her place as queen. The fight would be seen by the entire world, as it was to happen on an entirely different plane of existence; the plane of existence the fight would take place in would be like the ethereal realm, but more permeable. It had all been cobbled together from ideas for my first fanfic (which I subsequently abandoned and made into a one shot) and all while running on less than two hours of sleep, 4 bottles of mountain dew, and one or two bags of funyuns. Not sure if its that interesting of an idea, but if you need a direction there ya go.

note: lolz, posted without prereading my thought, run on sentence runs on.

1038115
Ah feet. The worst thing of the human body

3795879
Im pretty sure a week without sleep would make anyone crazy XD

I'm hoping you will continue this story. This has a lot going for it!

10476546
It’s been 8 years, it’s not happening

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