Session 15
Session 15.0 Mooncalf99
The train pulled into Fillydelphia 30th Street Station with the drawn-out squeal of metal wheels grinding against the rails. As if to announce the completion of its journey, the engine let out a final burst of steam, before finally stopping with a last shudder.
The train door swung open. "We're here!" Spike cried, leaping out of the wagon onto the landing. "C'mon, hurry!" He started looking around excitedly. "Where is she… she said she'd be here…"
"Spike! Spiiike!"
Spike managed just barely to turn his head before he was tackle-hugged by a reddish-brown dragoness. "Spike! What took you so long?"
Spike chuckled embarrassedly. "Hey, Mina. Sorry the train took so long. I can't always fly by princess, you know."
Mina laughed. "Apology accepted. So, you're ready?"
"Yeah, just…" Spike turned and glared at the train door. "C'mon, what's holding you two?"
The door opened again, and Twilight stepped out, followed by Trixie. "Sorry, I was worried I had left something behind and had to go check. Hello there, Mina."
"Your Highness," Mina said courteously, eliciting an exasperated eyeroll from Twilight.
"Yeah, I mentioned Twilight in my letters," Spike said. "And this is Trixie. She's… a friend."
Mina gasped. "THE Trixie? The one who took over the town of Ponyville and ruled it with a tyrannical cl… hoof?"
Trixie's face darkened, and she was about to say something when Spike leapt in front of her. "It's okay! She didn't mean anything bad, she's just got a thing for reformed villains!" He said to Trixie.
"'A thing'?" Trixie asked angrily.
"Well, yeah," Mina said enthusiastically. "It's just so cool, the whole dark going towards light, villain finding redemption and using their abilities for good, the lesson that we all have a piece of good within us if only we let it out…" She trailed off. "And you don't like me to bring it up, do you?"
"Trixie didn't really plan to go evil," Twilight said. "It was just a thing that happened."
"Ooh, I getcha," the dragoness said knowingly. "Like Ironhide in Claw of Vengenace. Sorry, I totally understand. Sorry!" She tapped her claws together pensively. "Oh, but listen to me prattle when we have places to be! Come on!" She turned and marched away, Spike scrambling to keep pace. The two ponies followed, hanging back a little.
"Good thing we left Starlight back in Ponyville," Trixie muttered, lowering her voice so the dragons wouldn't hear.
"Yeah… of course, she's probably safe since nopony except my friends and I know what she actually did," Twilight said. "And the ones we've told, like you."
"Trust me, I'm not telling anypony," Trixie said. "She's been hurt enough as it is. You've got your work cut out for you fixing her, Sparkle."
"I know… but I have to try," Twilight sighed.
They kept walking in silence for a while (the two ponies, that is; the two dragons were engaged in a heated discussion about who would win in a battle between Radiance and The Masked Matter-Horn) as they neared the district known as Dragontown. "So is she Spike's out-of-town marefriend or something?" Trixie suddenly asked. "Or dragoness-friend, if you prefer."
"I don't think so…" Twilight said uncertainly. "I'm pretty sure they're just friends. She's definitely the best dragon role model I could think of, though."
"Really?" Trixie asked.
"Before that…" Twilight began. "A while back, he tried to follow the Great Dragon Migration in order to 'find his roots', so to speak. It didn't work out too well. The only dragons who would speak to him were… well, a bunch of teenage bullies."
"Ouch," Trixie said. "I can imagine."
"After that, he decided he'd rather be like a pony," Twilight continued. "I'm really not sure that was an improvement, honestly. At one point he invented a 'Dragon Code' and… well, it was just all kinds of messy. Less said about that business, the better."
"He's always struck me as weird, even for a dragon," Trixie said. "No offense."
"That's right, you said you'd met dragons before," Twilight said, ignoring Trixie's main remark. "I guess you're looking forward to this, then?"
"Quite so," Trixie said. "It will be good to play again. Let's just hope the dragons here can provide a decent challenge."
By now they had entered Dragontown. The place was different; different sounds, different smells, different people. Dragons of all kinds, shapes and colors walked the streets, some giving the ponies suspicious glances and a few raised eyes, particularly Twilight. Even the buildings were different, more cave-like, and decorated archways spanned the streets.
Mina led the party towards her store - Dragon Comics - but then headed towards a cellar entrance. "Down here, guys."
The cellar opened up into a larger underground room, lit with hundreds of candles and decorated with chineighse silk screens and paintings, with woven carpets and soft pillows covering the stone floor. A scent of sulphur lingered in the air, and the dragon…
Spike, Twilight and Trixie goggled at the sight of the great dragon. Long and serpentine, covered in dark blue scales on his back and silvery white on his belly, his coiled body easily filled up a third of the room, making the table in front of him look miniscule in perspective. A red frill ran along his back from head to tail, giving him a fierce yet dignified air.
"Grandfather, this is Spike, who will be playing with us tonight," Mina said. "And his pony friends, Trixie and Princess Twilight. Spike, this is my grandfather… well, more like great-great-great-something-great-grandfather… uh, you can call him Master Babylon."
"Whoa… uh, hi?" Spike said nervously. He had kind of forgotten that some dragons got very big.
The ancient dragon focused his eyes on Spike, and his belly rumbled at he spoke. "Ah… the pony-raised hatchling young Mina spoke so much of. Such an intriguing sight. This will be an interesting evening."
"It's an honor, sir," Spike said courteously.
"Yes… yes, it is," Master Babylon rumbled. "And the ponies. The young princess, already a legend. And…" His eyes moved over Twilight, and then Trixie.
"...Uncle?" Trixie managed to say.
The ancient dragon stared at her. "Kokushi Muso?" he asked, disbelieving.
Trixie suddenly turned into a blur as she leapt at Babylon's scaly neck, hugging him. "I never thought I'd see you again, Uncle!"
"You… know… Grandfather?" Mina asked in utter disbelief. She looked at Twilight and Spike, but they were just as crestfallen as she was.
"Ah, little pony Kokushi Muso," Babylon said joyfully. "It is a delight to see that you are doing well. And you've grown bigger, too. Are you an adult now?"
"Mmm-hmm," Trixie said. "And you haven't changed at all, Uncle. When did you move to Equestria?"
"Ooh, that is a long story, little pony Kokushi Muso…" Babylon said.
"Hold it, hold it, hang on," Spike interrupted. "What's going on here? Why does Trixie know this… uh, Master Babylon? And what's with the weird name? Kooky-whatsit?"
Babylon laughed, a deep rumble like storm against the mountains. Trixie laughed in a more conventional pony-like manner. "I did tell Twilight I toured Chineigh as a filly, right? Sailed the rivers, played against dragons in the Temple of Four Winds. Uncle was one of my teachers. A great… no, the greatest mahjong player I've ever known."
"That is what you have come for, correct?" Babylon asked. "To play the game?"
"Yes, yes, of course," Spike said, trying furiously to comprehend the fullness of what he was seeing. She calls him Uncle. He's a great ancient dragon and she I don't even. It's absurd that no way. I can't even finish that thought. "And the… koshi-uh…"
"Kokushi Muso, or 'Thirteen Orphans', is a very valuable, very difficult claw," Trixie said. "And the one I got the one time I beat this old guy," Trixie said with a proud grin. "That was a wonderful day."
"Yes, I remember. A good victory. A happy filly. Kokushi Muso, not a skilled player, but lucky," the dragon mused.
"Skilled enough for somepony who's not centuries old," Trixie protested. "I usually won against my other opponents… anyway, we're here to play, right? Not talk old memories."
"Of course," Babylon rumbled. "Hatchling Spike, who will learn to play like a dragon tonight. Sit, Spike, opposite me. You are West, and I am East. Mina, Kokushi Muso, South and North…" He glanced at Twilight. "Thousand apologies, Princess Twilight Sparkle. If you wish to play, Mina could…"
"No, no, it's okay, I'll just watch for now," Twilight said quickly. " And Trixie… I mean, Kokushi Muso has been very eager to play, as well. Just as much as Spike, probably."
Mina opened the lacquered box on the table and started taking out the dozens of square white tiles stacked inside. Spike picked one up and looked at the symbol on its side; five stylized canes of bamboo, beautifully painted. "So this is what they look like, huh?"
"Don't tell me you haven't even read up on the game," Mina said. She began turning the tiles face down and shuffling them around with her claws.
"I've read books… and some weird manega… but this is the first time I've seen an actual… you know, the actual game set." He tapped the tile with a claw. "What's it made of? Heavier than I thought…"
"White diamond," Mina said offhandedly.
Spike's eyes widened immediately, and his stomach growled. "D-d-diamond?!"
"Don't even think about it," Trixie said sharply. She snatched the tile from him with her magic and dropped it on the table. Together, she and Mina stacked the tiles into a wide square, two levels high.
"Mahjong teaches discipline, focus, perspective," Babylon said. "Good qualities for a young dragon wishing to grow properly. Making the tiles out of that which is precious and delicious and tempting the greed is a good lesson."
Mina leaned over to Spike. "He just likes to see us kids squirm," she whispered.
"I am not yet deaf, young Mina," Babylon said. "Fear not, ravenous young Spike. We shall have refreshments later. But now, we play."
Spike contemplated the tantalizingly delicious tiles standing in front of him. Thirteen in total, to be formed into a winning 'claw'. It wasn't complete by any stretch of imagination, but it had started well. Three identical one-bamboos, or one-Sou as Trixie had called them; one pair of seven-Man (the ones with a red squiggly symbol); and a three-Pin (the circles) and a four-Pin, which he had completed with a five-Pin drawn from the wall.
Best of all, he'd started with two East Winds, and when Trixie had discarded a third one, he'd claimed it with a 'Pon'. He was pretty certain that was a good move.
He glanced at the center of the table, where a dozen discarded tiles lay. Was he supposed to memorize which tiles had passed and try to figure out what the others were holding? That seemed complicated, but he suspected that it was part of the game. Master Babylon could probably read him like an open book, the way he gazed back in that classic 'inscrutable old master' way of his. Trixie was probably doing that as well, if he were to hazard a guess. Even though he had scored a small victory stealing that East Wind from her, she didn't look too bothered. She just kept up that smug 'I'm smarter and better than you, I know something you don't and I'm going to win' face she always used, no matter how she was playing. It could mean anything. And Mina… smiled back at him in her usual friendly way. She didn't seem to take the game too seriously, and was probably going easy on him since it was his first time. He wasn't sure if he should be offended by that.
Meanwhile, Twilight kept craning over his head and looking at his tiles while breathing down his neck in a way that was frankly annoying. He had indicated that maybe she should go pester someone else, but Trixie had shot fireworks at her when she tried to get near. At least she had stopped trying to give him tips. He could win this on his own. Or at least lose with dignity.
He discarded a two-Man he probably didn't need… and then beat himself mentally. Over on the dead wall, the 'Dora' tile - one tile turned face up - showed one-Man. That meant that two-Man was 'Dora', so any of those tiles would automatically be worth extra points, like in Scrabble. But if he couldn't use it to complete his claw, there was no point to it. Right?
A few more turns passed. He noticed that three South Winds had been discarded, so that one was useless now. He drew a West Wind, noted that two more had already gone, and discarded it without regret.
The Yaku was tricky. You couldn't declare victory without one. Of course, exactly what counted as a Yaku was the real challenge, since there were all sorts of things. Trixie had 'joked' that he'd forget all about it and try to get a victory without one and humiliate himself, so he'd made real certain to remember it perfectly and not give her the satisfaction… wait. Had Trixie insulted him just to force him into memorizing the rule? That sneaky little… Still, his three East Winds counted. He was West, but the Seat was East. So he was in the clear there.
Another few turns, with nothing spectacular happening. It was curiously eerie to not hear anyone say anything other than naming their discards. Trixie in particular. So much empty silence and she wasn't even trying to fill it up with speaking. Was she actually taking the game seriously?
He discarded his third nine-Pin, feeling a little remorseful at the loss of a perfectly functional Pon. Even though he wouldn't have known it at the time. His next tile was a Green Dragon, which just looked ugly. At least the red one had a clean style, and the white one was ultra-minimalistic, being completely blank. "Green Dragon." Into the discards it went. Mina ignored it, drew a tile from the wall, then discarded a Green Dragon of her own. "Green Dragon. Reach!"
"What?" Spike said, confused, as he snapped out of the game-trance he'd been slipping into.
"She declared Reach," Trixie said. "If you have an almost complete claw just waiting for the last tile and it's hidden, you can declare Reach and wager a thousand points. Then you must discard every tile you draw and ignore all the other players' discards until you find a winning tile, so you're locked in and can't change anything. But if you win, you get extra points from your wager."
"That's right, Spike," Mina teased while she placed one of her score sticks on the table. "I'm gonna win."
"Oh yeah?" he said. "Maybe I can do the same thing."
"Not with that open Pon there," Trixie said. "Hidden only."
"Oh…" Spike frowned. Fine. He could still win, right? He drew an eight-Man. With his six and seven, he'd have a Chi; cheap but doable. He'd just have to discard his other seven. It hurt a little to split a good pair, but… perspective, right? And now he just needed a two-Sou to complete his pair and he'd win! Yes! And that one hadn't been discarded even once yet, so the odds were good.
The game went on. Discard… discard… discard… the last nine-Pin, huh… discard… discard… Master Babylon discarding a two-Sou…
Wait, what? "Ah, uh, Ron! That's the word, right?" he said hurriedly.
"That's exactly the right word, young Spike," Babylon said. "Now reveal your claw."
"Oh, right." He turned over his tiles. "Is it good?"
"Mostly garbage," Trixie scoffed. "Only one Yaku, and a cheap one at that."
"Don't listen to her, Spike," Mina reassured him. "That's a perfectly fine claw. And you get the points I wagered, so that's always a bonus." She took a few score markers from Babylon's side, added the one she had wagered, and gave them to Spike.
"Now we will rebuild the wall and proceed to the next round," Babylon declared.
Spike blinked. "Wait, there's more?"
For almost his whole life, Spike had had the unusual privilege of being carried on Twilight's back. Although definitely not too spoiled to walk, it had often been the most expedient way of moving around, especially when his short legs wouldn't afford the speed to keep up with the ponies. So, rather predictably, he was very used to being on Twilight's back, even comfortably so. Certainly comfortable enough to sleep while she was walking down the street of Fillydelphia at night.
"Wow, he's out like a light," Mina said,giving her fellow dragon a light poke that failed to rouse him. "He was really on fire tonight."
"Would you expect any less?" Trixie said. "Tonight was the night when he finally became an adult."
"Er… Miss Trixie, mahjong may be part of our cultural heritage, but it's not a rite of passage," Mina said.
"Zzznrrk… Menzen Tsumo… zzz…" Spike muttered, rolling over.
"Still, he played pretty well, I think," Twilight said. "He won a few times, after all."
"And lost more than a few times," Trixie said. "Good to know I've still got it."
"Grandfather still won the long game," Mina pointed out.
"He usually does," Trixie admitted. "We're a thousand years too early to beat a player of his caliber."
"...San Shoku Dokou… hnnn…" Spike muttered.
"It was really very sweet when you met him again," Twilight said playfully. "I didn't know you had it in you, 'Kokushi Muso'."
"You do realize that teasing me about the nickname I earned by completing one of the most spectacular and improbable claws in the whole game makes no sense, right?" Trixie said. "It would be like teasing Rainbow Dash about becoming a Wonderbolt or insulting you by calling you 'Princess'."
"...Okay, you have a point," Twilight admitted. "Still, I suppose you'll want to visit more often."
"Maybe," Trixie said. "Now and then."
"Ooh! You can stay at my place!" Mina exclaimed. She rubbed her claws together. "But you know what you have to do, right…?"
"I said I don't want to talk about my so-called 'villainous past'," Trixie said.
"It might be therapeutic," Mina suggested. "Talking it out. And entertaining for me. Come onnn! I just want to know your deep and tragic story!"
"Ugh, fans," Trixie muttered, pulling her hat down on her head. "And I thought Snips and Snails were bad…"
(This one really grew out of control. Especially since I was supposed to do another TFOS skit. Points if you know where Babylon is from.)
Session 15.1 Kichi (Slight addition by me)
Shining Armor, Princess Mi amore Cadenza and somehow King Sombra and Queen Chrysalis looked to each other. They were in the Crystal Empire sitting in the throne room, Shining Armor invited them to test for a new game and they were waiting for the final player.
"Twilight is late..." Muttered Shining as he was looking to the others.
"So... You tried to return to your empire only to be almost destroyed by the power of love thanks to a magical artifact?" Asked Chrysalis as she put her hoof in front of the mouth to hide a little how she was smiling.
Sombra that was biting a crystal looked to Chrysalis with a angry stare.
"At last I was not shoot away with my army thanks the power of your food" Smiled Sombra.
Chrysalis was about to answer when a bright pink light appeared and a white alicorn filly appeared.
"Hi Mommy, Hi daddy, Hi uncle Sombra, Hi Auntie Chrysalis, I'm here to play today..." Say the filly waving the hoof.
Cadence awoke from her dream and looked at her large belly. "Dear... I want donuts, dipped in soy sauce."
Session 15.2 Alex Warlorn
"You're beyond insane Chancellor Cinch! You can't control the Umbrum! You'll destroy the Crystal Empire!"
The Chancellor teleported to the far end of the end. She fired a beam from her horn at the float crystals in the room, creating a shift ring of lasers around the room. "We will control the Umbrum! And when we do, King Sombra will save the Crystal Empire, not doom it!"
The Shadowbolt 5's jaws dropped in and out of game. When Sunny Flare said he'd found a way to sneak into an unfinished portion of the game of Equestria Online, Sugar Coat had of course said if they were caught they were likely to get banned. Indigo Zap and Lemon Zest thought that just made it more exciting. And Sour Sweet was just bored.
The area for the Crystal Empire expansion (that was still in alpha, with the next expansion nearly done with its beta (AT LAST)), and the NPCs were mostly incomplete, as was their dialogue, and texture maps were missing. There was however, apparently a time battle to defeat the 'King Sombra's minions, and restore the crystal heart to its rightful place, meaning the entire dungeon had to be beaten in a time limit. It was again, mostly incomplete... but the Shadowbolt 5 hadn't expected, was one of the bosses to an obvious pony version of their dictator like principle.
"Who works at that game company that she ticked off?" Was all Indigo Zap could say.
They didn't get a chance to answer as a Yak in full plate armor appeared out of nowhere. "Players in area players not meant to be! YAKS DESTROY!"
"RUN FOR IT!" Lemon Zest cried and galloped away.
"WE'RE DOOM! Oh wait, we can just log out idiot." Said Sour Sweet and did the 'log out' command.
Session 15.3 Kendell2
The group had continued to play the game, and after Trixie defeated the Fishpony Pirate's captain (by using a technique involving piledriving him through his own hideout with magic handkerchief ropes generated by her Fruit (which she'd called 'Sho Sho No Mi', or Show Show Fruit, to fit the Show Magic theme), the group had finished their last stop before entering the Grand Line.
Rainbow Dash had picked up replacement swords, since her two non-Grade swords had been shattered in her duel with Hawk-Eye (the Griffin who was the World's Best Swordsman) to become his Worthy Opponent. One of which was cursed and required a luck role to obtain to see if her character's luck beat out the curse, which it did, and got another Grade sword, meaning all three of hers were now . Trixie had had a run in with the local Marine Captain, another Hopeless Boss Fight, but she did put up as best of a fight she could before having to retreat.
"Why does a guy MADE of smoke smoke anyway?" Rainbow Dash asked. Smoking was very rare in their world, normally only dragons did it because of health hazards (Dragons could breath volcanic ash with no problems).
"Probably because he can without harm due to being made of smoke?" Twilight asked. "Alright, now we''ve got two paths we can take," she explained. "We have an optional Filler Quest we can do."
"Filler?" Starlight asked.
Twilight nodded. "They're arcs the audio drama adaptations made up to fill time when they over took the Manega and are noncanon. As a result you don't NEED to do them, but you CAN to get some extra level grinding in and get extra treasure, and normally a few unique items."
"Hmm..." Trixie said. "And what is this filler mission?"
"Helping a little girl with the ability to speak to animals save a Millennial Dragon from some corrupt Marines trying to use his bones to make an immortality position, by getting him back to his home island where he'll be reborn," Twilight explained.
Fluttershy gave a gasp. "We're helping animals?!"
"Well, technically A animal. But yes," Twilight explained.
Trixie blinked, looking at Fluttershy's excited look. "...Trixie thought you were afraid of dragons."
"...Um...I am...but when it's in danger...um..."
"Trixie understands. Fine, we help the girl. Besides, befriending a dragon has advantages."
"And an ancient dragon might be helpful for my character," Starlight explained, her character being an archaeologist.
"Alright, Filler Quest taken," Twilight replied, giving a smile.
Session 15.4 Alex Warlorn
Rainbow Dash smiled. "Good thing we found out that floating island thing was just a superstition, and the guy who recounted its existence was just a glorified Trixie, uh, no offense Trixie... Uh, Twilight, why are you banging your head against the table?"
Session 15.5 MtangaLion
"Sorry, Ah'm late, everypony," said Applejack, limping a bit as she joined her friends at Ponyville's train station.
Rainbow Dash looked away from the arriving train and hovered over AJ. "Are you feeling alright? It's not like you to show up last."
"Next to last, darling," Rarity gently corrected her.
Fluttershy flew in for a landing just then, short of breath. "Sorry... Bumblebee emergency..." Nopony questioned this.
Pinkie prodded AJ's shoulder with a hoof, and blinked with wide eyes when the farmpony stumbled a bit. "Maybe AJ's been working too hard. I can throw you a 'Taking a Break' party if you want." She started bouncing in place. "Oooh, oooh, can I?"
AJ snorted. "Me, workin' too hard? Ain't no such thing, sugarcube."
Twilight groaned. "Didn't we already have this argument four or five years ago?" Unlike most days, the Alicorn actually looked the part of a princess... she'd put on silver hoofshoes and a small crown.
Rainbow Dash scratched her mane. "So... talking wolves? What's that all about?"
Twilight beamed. "Actually, they're a previously unknown breed of Diamond Dogs. More intelligent than the packs we tend to meet around here... advanced mystical arts, very secretive. Apparently, they were living in the far north for centuries, and we never knew until they had a border dispute with the Crystal Empire just recently." She looked up. "Ah, they're here!"
The train car doors slid open, and three "wolf dogs" padded out... a large silver-furred male who would have been about the size of a pony stallion on all fours, wearing a vest and a moonstone on a golden chain, and two smaller dogs who immediately took to sniffing all around, alert for threats.
Twilight bowed politely. "Prince Erik! On behalf of everyone, I'd like to welcome you to Ponyville."
The large wolf grinned, keeping his fangs hidden. "Ah, Princess Twilight Sparkle. Greetings! It is good to be having a *friendly* meeting between our two kinds, yes?"
"Absolutely," said Twilight brightly. "I'm honored that you chose to stop here before going on to Canterlot. If you'll come this way, we have some refreshments."
Twilight led the way at first, but Prince Erik quickly moved to walk alongside her, with the smaller wolves loping alongside on all fours to guard their flanks. The rest of Twilight's friends exchanged puzzled glances, before following along behind.
"We've heard many things about you," rumbled Prince Erik. "Some question whether you are truly the Princess of Friendship, or the Princess of Gaming."
Twilight blushed. "I admit, maybe that has gotten a little out of hoof. It's kind of taken over the whole town." They came to a tent in Ponyville's main square, with some temporary tables set up. "I thought you might like to try some spiced meats from Ponyville's new griffon restaurant."
One of the smaller wolves tasted the meat first and nodded to the Prince, who took a larger portion with his bare forepaw, gnawing and chewing thoughtfully. "Good, yes... quite flavorful."
Fluttershy seemed to be biting her lip to keep herself from saying anything. Curiously, Applejack edged towards one of the side tables and reached a hoof towards a piece of meat.
The Prince himself slapped AJ's hoof away, "Ah ah! These spices are very strong, yes? Not good for ponies."
AJ coughed. "Sorry, Ah didn't know! Ah was just curious, was all."
Rarity looked at AJ like she'd grown a second head. "Pinkie Pie is going to throw you that party, darling, and you are going to attend. I must insist."
The big wolf chuckled. "Since you a such a fan of gaming, Princess Twilight, I thought that we might play a game while I am here. A Wolf game." He smiled and folded his "arms" across his chest, letting his fangs show a bit this time.
"I love learning new games!" exclaimed Twilight. "How do we play?"
Prince Erik chuckled. "We are playing it already, princess. One of my wolves has replaced someone you know. Perhaps even one of your closest friends! You have two hours until my train leaves again, to discover which one. If you cannot..."
He trailed off, as they all heard loud hoof beats approaching. Applejack came galloping around a building, panting, disheveled, and missing her hat. "We've got a big problem, girls! Some varmint drugged mah apple pie and left me in a closet! Good thing Ah didn't finish that pie, or..."
Applejack froze, staring at... Applejack? She started pawing at the ground, snorting. "You! Varmit! Imposter! Ah'll make a wolfskin rug out of yer hide! Gimme back mah HAT!!"
The Applejack that had walked with them from the train station let out a very canine yipe and dodged a hoof that smashed one of the tables to kindling. "Now hold on now, missy! Ah can explain!"
AJ snatched her hat and jammed it back on her own head, while her friends gawked, and the wolves all face-pawed. "And quit talkin' like me! The jig is up, whoever y'all are!"
"What, and break character? Nothin' doin!"
Twilight twitched. "Now, everypony and wolf... let's calm down..."
Erik snarled. "Alisa, you ruined game before it starts!" He jabbed a claw at her. "The plan was perfect, take Element of Honesty so she cannot reveal truth! You had one job, Alisa, one job!"
"Oh, shut yer yap," growled the imposter. "Ah had to do farm work so they wouldn't get suspicious... farm work, in a dang blasted pony costume!"
Prince Erik rolled his golden eyes. "Oh dear, *work*. You poor cub. You are wolf, yes!? You are strong, strong as any earth pony."
"Ah beg to differ! Mah back's aching something awful, and Ah didn't have any excuse for not bucking apples, so now mah paws are *killing* me!" Alisa lifted an orange hind hoof, shaking it limply. "Plus, Ah'm starvin', dangit!" The not-an-orange-farm-pony seized a large piece of leftover spiced meat, drooling and fangs gleaming, and literally wolfed it down.
Fluttershy fainted on the spot. Rarity put a hoof to her mouth, cheeks suddenly bulging. Rainbow burst out laughing in mid-air.
Erik face-pawed again. "Disgraceful. You are banished, and you will live in Ponyville, in that costume..." Alisa sank lower and lower the further the Prince went. "... removing it *only* when no pony will see, until you learn to infiltrate a pony village properly."
"Don't Ah get a say in this?" asked the real Applejack.
Alisa smirked. "Don't you fret none. Ah doubt Ah'll be impersonating *you* again. Ah've learned mah lesson."
Twilight gritted her teeth. "You certainly won't be! No one is going to be doing *any* more impersonating of ponies around here!"
"Of course, of course!" said Erik. "You must deal with any unauthorized wolves that you find in your town, however you see fit and your laws require."
Twilight sighed with relief. "Thank you, your highness. Now... Alisa, right? If you come with us and cooperate, I'm sure I can talk the mayor out of... pressing charges?"
The fake AJ was nowhere to be seen.
Twilight stamped a hoof. "Your highness, please! This could cause an international incident!"
The Prince gave her a sharp-toothed grin. "No, Princess Twilight. This is merely round two of the game. Now, I hear there is a famous bakery in these parts..."
Session 15.5 BrutalityInc
“Gizmo Myron Point-Dexter, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!” Shining Armor roared, bursting into Gizmo/Point-Dexter’s suite in the Crystal Palace.
Gizmo spat out the glass of orange juice he was drinking as he beheld the enraged (and simultaneously terrified) army unicorn marching up to him and hauled him up to his snarling face by his collar via telekinesis, “S-S-Shining! Why are you so upset? What did I do?” Gizmo squeaked out, trying to avoid his death glare.
“You tell me!” Shining growled. Then he started shaking Gizmo, “The game! Where did you put the game?!”
“... You have to be more specific. We’re making like, what, two games per week by now?” Gizmo asked confusedly.
“The one we’re suppose to be play-testing today!” Shining reminded him, “I was in the dining-room to oversee the staff setting things up, but instead I found the game Oubliette Quest! You didn’t send that other game to my sister and her friends yet, have you?!”
“Oh... Oh!” Now Gizmo understood why Shining was upset. He mixed up Oubliette Quest with that game by mistake… And then he remembered just what kind of game that was, and went pale with horror as he realized the full ramification of his mistake. “Oh, fewmets… it’s already in the mail!”
Shining cursed and dropped Gizmo onto the floor, “Do you have any idea how much trouble we’ll get into if they played it?” Gizmo nodded dismally. “We have to hurry! Get Gaffer and 8-Bit! If we board a train now we still might make it in time!”
He turned and gallop down the corridor, with Gizmo getting up and galloping after him. As he ran, frantic and terrible thoughts went through his mind about the potential consequences should his sister and her friends played this game – Her sister and her friends traumatized by the dark and depressing world the game is set in; Princess Luna raising their internal doubts and guilt over the bloody and gory game-play as nightmares to haunt their sleep; his wife Cadence lashing out at him with anger and disappointment over his negligence (And their yet-to-be-born child somehow smacking him with a baseball bat, again)…
This game wasn’t for the faint of heart, and he had promised he won’t send any dark games to his sister in the foreseeable future, for the sake of her sanity and his conscience. He had only hoped that he wasn’t too late.
= = =
He was, of course, too late.
“The game? Oh, we got it early in this morning thanks to Muffins!” Spike told them at the entrance of the Friendship Castle. “Twilight and the others had been playing it for the past hour!”
Terror gripping their hearts, the stallions brushed past Twilight’s dragon assistant and made a beeline for the main throne-room. Too late to kill momentum from their dead-heat run, Shining used his own speed, his body’s mass and a shield spell to literally ram open the doors of the throne-room …
… to find six happy mares sitting around the table playing a board-game; they were laughing, cheering, eating snacks, and clearly having a good time.
“BBBFF!” Twilight exclaimed as the rest of her friends noticed the four stallion’s sudden dramatic entrance. “I didn’t know you are visiting today!”
“Twiley!” Shining exclaimed, too panicked to notice what Twilight was saying, “I’m so sorry I sent you the wrong game I know it’s dark I didn’t meant to traumatize you are you all alright - !”
“Shiny, calm down! What do you mean dark?” Twilight asked, confused, “We’re having fun with it!”
“I’m so sorry I – wait, what?” Shining stopped motor-mouthing out of incredulity, “You mean… you liked it?”
“Liked it? It’s awesome!” Rainbow Dash called out, “What makes you think we don’t like it...?”
= = =
Session 15.6 Mooncalf99
Twilight rubbed her chin contemplatively as she looked over the central table, which today was covered with a hex-tiled map of what appeared to be Ponyville. Rarity had said several days ago that she wanted to test her own attempt at a game, and… well, it certainly looked very enterprising. Each tile had clearly designated terrain types - streets, buildings, woods, fields, water, and so on - but were lovingly painted with care and skill, with all the landmarks readily noticeable. Several stacks of card in different colors lay on a nearby table, neatly organized, next to several stitched bags.
On the other hoof, all but the most center area - with the castle in the very middle - was full of little game markers depicting parasprites. There was no mistaking those innocently menacing big-eyed faces.
"I call it 'Parasprite Assault'," Rarity said. "It's a working title, so if anypony has a better suggestion… anyway. The general premise is that hordes of parasprites are descending on Ponyville, continuously spawning from the magical rifts around the border and moving towards the center. If they reach the castle, you lose."
"Great, now they come out of portals," Pinkie Pie grumbled. "As if they weren't bad enough normally."
"Sorry, Pinkie dear," Rarity said. "I know your personal distaste for them, but I needed a threat that was… well, mindless, as it were, and they fit the bill. I thought of using zombies first, but… eech. No."
"So that's how you lose," Rainbow Dash said. "How do you win? Clobber them all? 'Cuz I could totally go for smacking around those pests."
"To win, you have to seal all the rifts, as well as defeat all the sprites on the board," Rarity explained. "I'm considering a time limit as well, but I'm not sure it's needed. We'll see how long it takes. This is all very experimental."
"There's so many of them," Fluttershy said. "Can we really defeat them all? Also, when you say 'defeat'…"
"I'm sure you can determine for yourself what that means," Rarity said diplomatically. "Stuff them in a bag, knock them unconscious, whatever you prefer. Now…" She placed a small bag full of red stones in front of each player, along with a player marker showing their cutiemark (or a different personal symbol for the non-ponies in their group). "You all start at the castle. These stones represent your action points… don't eat those, Spike, they're not real gems."
"Bleah," Spike said in disgust. "Tastes like ash."
"Yes, they're magically created, so they're not actually made from anything except normal background magic," Rarity said. "Anyway, moving to another square costs an action point, and attacking costs an action point. As does searching for equipment to help you fight. Normally you only defeat one parasprite per attack, but weapons increase your attack range. However, every attack risks your weapon getting eaten by the parasprite, so if you're unlucky, you'll spend a lot of points searching for new ones. Now, the interesting thing about a point-based action system is that we don't have to take turns. As long as you have points, you can do whatever you want, or you can hang back and let the others act before you."
"What happens when you run out of points? Can you get more somehow?" Twilight asked.
"Oh, yes!" Rarity said. "You have to buy them at ten points per bit." She laughed. "Just kidding, darling. They actually replenish magically every few minutes. You start out with fifty points, and you can have up to a hundred and fifty saved. The upside is that you can take a break if you have a more pressing engagement elsewhere, and you can just get back in and catch up when you're done. Bear in mind that I advance the sprites in real time, so…"
"So it's a pretty long game, then?" Applejack asked.
"Yes, I was hoping to make one of those games that could potentially last for days, and involve a lot of players working together or independently, and jumping in whenever they can. In fact, I spoke to a few others earlier, and they said they might show up if they have time." Rarity frowned suddenly. "Oh dear, maybe I shouldn't have used the Cutie Map as a table. What if we have an emergency?"
"It'll be fine, Rarity," Twilight assured her. "Worst case, we'll just work around it. Now, I'm guessing that the sprites aren't going to just sit there while we fight them?"
"I sure hope not," Discord said. "I didn't make the parasprites to be… I mean, I didn't make the parasprites. Haha, what a crazy idea, me creating an unstoppable species of vermin capable of spreading terror and devastation wherever they went. Don't know why I even brought it up." He shrank back from Pinkie's decidedly un-Pinkie-like death glare. "What I was going to say was, do they fight back? Do something weird? Anything?"
"Indeed they do," Rarity said with a smirk. "To begin with, every time you attack them, there's a chance they infect you with sprite fever."
"Sprite fever?" Applejack asked with a raised eyebrow.
"If you have a better suggestion, I'm all ears," Rarity replied. "If you're infected, you lose health every time you make an attack, with a bigger health loss the bigger the swarm in your area. As your health drops, you take penalties, and when it reaches zero, you're penalized a number of action points and moved back to the castle. The only way to get uninfected and restore health is to find a medical station, or if another player who has the Medic skill can reach you. Either way, it costs action points."
"Hang on there," Twilight said, ears perked in interest. "We get to have skills?"
"You certainly do," Rarity said, passing out several simple sheets. She rather enjoyed it that way, presenting new things along the way instead of giving them everything at once. "You can heal others, build defenses, replenish action points faster, dodge infection, take less damage, increase chances of hitting a special sprite…"
"A what now?" Pinkie asked.
"Whenever too many parasprites gather in an area, there may spawn special, more powerful sprites," Rarity explained. "Unlike the regular ones, they can dodge, so you need to roll dice to see if you hit them, with your choice of weapon affecting the chance. They also have unique abilities… which I won't tell you about until you encounter them." She grinned like a cat; she was enjoying this. "Anyway, defeating a special sprite is worth fifteen points, while the regular kind are worth one. Raising a skill from zero to one costs a hundred points, from one to two costs two hundred, and so on. All of you start out with zero in all skills."
"That's going to take a lot of fighting to get anywhere…" Starlight mused. She had been quiet for the explanation up until now. "Still, I appreciate that everypony starts out equally, at least at first."
"Naturally, dear," Rarity said kindly. "Nopony and no one gets any unearned advantages. Besides, you'll benefit from helping each other, so if one player gets better at something it's just an advantage to the players as a whole. After all, this isn't a game where only one player wins. Either you all win, or you all lose."
"That's… actually a very good point," Twilight said. "I didn't realize that at first! Teamwork is definitely going to be important here, guys."
"Yeah, yeah, I'm just gonna trounce them," Rainbow said cockily. "Well, what are we waiting for? Let get started!"
Oh, you are going to regret those words, my overconfident friend, Rarity thought with a smirk. "Yes, let's."
"Okay, ah'm gonna defend the Acres," Applejack said, moving her marker several steps towards the orchards. "Bare hooves ain't gonna cut it, so let's try searchin' this field…" She plucked a light green card from one of the item decks. "A shovel, huh? Not bad. Takes out three sprites per whack. Then I go inta the next area an' whack the two baddies there. What's the roll fer avoidin' gettin' infected?"
"There's two of them, so anything above two on a percentile," Rarity said. "It may be too easy, but this is just a preliminary test."
"Looks like I'm safe. Time ta clean up mah home," Applejack said.
"I'm cutting across the park towards the forest," Rainbow Dash said. "There's some thick clusters that way, and I wanna see what Rarity's cooked up for those 'super-sprites'."
"Girls, maybe we should have some kind of strategy?" Twilight suggested. "Like say not run off half-cocked and risk getting into trouble? We need to cover the map properly so they don't slip past us."
"Pfft," Rainbow snorted. "Flying off half-cocked is my best style! Now, since my in-game self apparently doesn't have my baddie-punishing moves, I need to find something cool. What's the the park?" She dug through the deck. "Nothing… nothing… a lawnmower? Whoa, 1d8+5 damage? That's some serious whacking!"
"What the hay?" Applejack protested. "Ah want somethin' better than this shovel! Cheatin'!"
"Sorry, AJ, but I'm just awesomely lucky that way," Rainbow laughed as she moved ahead through several lightly occupied areas, taking out each swarm in one hit. "Time to mow down the serious opposition!"
"You should probably be careful, Rainbow," Fluttershy warned. "Wouldn't it be better to raise your skills a bit first? I'm going to clean up the smaller swarms before I go for anything big…"
"Nah, moving around too much is just a waste of action points," Rainbow said. "I'm going for the motherlode." She moved her marker into a forest tile." Okay, so what's there?"
"Thirty parasprites, a Nibbler and a Belcher," Rarity said. "Remember, you can only attack a single special sprite per action, and the chance of hitting is determined by your weapon."
"And the lawnmower has a 25% chance to hit…" Rainbow read. "Eh, good enough. Let's take a whack at that, uh, Belcher?" She rolled. "Aw, miss."
Rarity made her own rolls. "Well, the sprites don't manage to infect you. The Belcher spits up six parasprites."
"Six?" Pinkie said. "Yeesh, that's gonna be a problem pretty quickly."
"No prob, I've got like a chance in four to hit, so I'll just take four swings," Rainbow said dismissively. "One more try… aw, miss again."
"The Belcher adds another seven sprites, and you barely avoid catching the fever," Rarity said with a wide grin, clearly enjoying herself. "Also, the Nibbler successfully Nibbles you."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Rainbow said. "It's trying to eat me or something?"
"Well, it's not actually hurting you or anything, but it's latching on to your face and won't let go. Until it's been disposed of, you can't move, take special actions or fight anything other than the Nibbler."
"Great. I need to whack something that's sitting on my face, and all I have is a lawnmower," she grumbled. "If this was for real, I'd look ridiculous."
"I warned you," Fluttershy admonished.
"One more try," Rainbow muttered. "Aw yeah, a clean hit! That's fifteen points, right?"
"Right," Rarity said. "And five more sprites are belched forth. Aaand you have sprite fever and take seven points of damage."
"Ugh," Rainbow grunted.
"A harmonica, huh?" Pinkie said. "Nice nod to the stuff that actually works, Rarity!"
"Of course," Rarity said. "It's balanced, of course, but I'm assuming you can pacify them with the music."
"Do I get extra bonuses if I can find a whole instrument set?" Pinkie asked eagerly.
"Hmm… I see what you're getting at, but I don't want to change the rules in the middle of the game," Rarity said thoughtfully. "I'll consider it."
"I guess I'll just fight normally for now," Pinkie said agreeably. "Aw, they ate it! Okay, I need to search for something else… ooh, cymbals! Take that! No, don't eat them too! Okay, a tuba! That's five down and don't eat the tuba! Waah! Why are musical instruments so fragile and delicious? Okay, what's this…" Her eyes widened as she read the card. "Flaming hotsauce breath technique? 1d6 damage? Can't be lost?!?"
"Isn't that a bit of a game breaker?" Twilight asked.
"It's not really that powerful, and fairly rare besides," Rarity said. "It seemed like a fun idea."
"Forget the music, I'm burning everything!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Whee!"
"What's an automatic fireworks launcher, and why would Bon Bon have one in her shop?" Sweetie Belle asked.
"Better yet…" Scootaloo said. "How can we get one in real life?"
"Good going, Rares," Applejack said sourly. "Now the real Ponyville's gonna get burned down too."
"Oops," Rarity said apologetically.
"I say, I'm in a bit of a tight spot here," The Doctor said. "Pinned down, infected, low on health… could really use some help, you know?"
Vinyl Scratch obligingly moved her marker towards his position… then changed course and passed him by with a smirk.
"Good grief, you're not still holding a grudge, are you?" The Doctor protested. "I swear, some ponies…"
"Don't worry, Nurse Muffin to the rescue!" Derpy announced, skipping her bubble-adorned marker across the map. "I bought the Medic skill, so I'll have you fixed up in a jiffy! There you go!"
"Thank you, old girl," The Doctor said. "At least some ponies know the value of teamwork."
"Unfortunately, while you're uninfecting him, the parasprites counter-attack and successfully infect you," Rarity said.
"Oops," Derpy said with a grin.
"Maybe we should make a tactical retreat before patching up," The Doctor suggested.
"You miss, and the Dazzler Dazzles you," Rarity said. "You lose an additional action point for being zoned out."
"I try again," Starlight said. She rolled. "17? That's not enough…"
"Afraid you're Dazzled again," Rarity said.
"Okay, I retreat to Fluttershy's cottage and look for something useful, since this tree branch isn't working." She drew three cards before getting something. "Hypnospell? Can only be used three times, but that's enough. I'm not going to ask what that was doing in Fluttershy's home…"
"Random draw, really," Rarity said. All house areas have a chance of finding things like that."
"Or maybe our game designing friend is trying to insinuate that I leave dangerous magic around where the unwary can find it and wreak untold chaos," Discord suggested. He paused. "Mental note to self…" He scribbled something down on a sticky note and stuck it in his head.
"Better put it ta good use," Applejack said. "At least y'all can use magic."
"No, no, any player can use the spells they find, regardless of what kind of pony they are," Rarity protested. "As well as non-ponies, obviously. What do you take me for? I'm not giving out unfair advantages or disadvantages here."
"Good, because no proper game should do that," Starlight said. "And yet…"
~~~~~~
Meanwhile…
"Jeez, get a load of this, will you? If you play as a caribou, you're completely immune to magic," Gaffer said, frowning with disapproval. "Total gamebreaker. And whoa, if you play as a mare, you get crippling penalties to… well… practically anything. And that's not even getting started on the fluff. Whoever wrote this has issues. No, subscriptions! Can you believe this?"
"What I can't believe is that you have that piece of literary horsedroppings to begin with," 8-Bit said. "I think even Twilight would burn it at a glance, and she once preached for fifteen minutes about how 'every book is sacred'."
"You know the old adage: 'Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it'," Gaffer said. "Still." He carefully ziplocced the book, stuffed it into a bag, and then teleported it away, hopefully never to be seen again. "And now I gotta go wash my hooves."
"I thought you were holding it with your magic?" 8-Bit asked.
"Yeah," Gaffer said. "Your point?"
~~~~~~
"And now that Town Hall is free, The Great and Powerful Trixie will spend ten action points and unlock the Orbital Friendship Cannon!" Trixie declared with her usual flair.
"Wait, wait wait wait wait wait," Rainbow Dash interrupted. "There's an orbital cannon in the Town Hall?"
"No, in orbit, obviously," Trixie said with a roll of her eyes. "But the controls are in Town Hall. Didn't you read the manual?"
"There's a manual?" Rainbow asked.
"Whatever!" Trixie said. "Can Trixie fire high-yield magical doom from the heavens now?"
"Go right ahead, Trixie," Rarity said. "Pick an area on the map."
"Trixie chooses the one over there, swamped with parasprites." The magician grinned. "The one where Rainbow Dash is."
"No no no…" Rainbow winced. "This is gonna suck, isn't it?"
"A blinding blast of rainbow light shoots out of the sky," Rarity said. "All parasprites in the target area and three tiles away are defeated. Of course, the player characters within range are completely unaffected," she added.
"Of course," Trixie said. "Trixie knew that all along."
"Yeah, like cirrocumulus you knew… still, now that I'm not getting munched to death, I'll--" Rainbow's eyes widened. "Aw, man! You stole my kills! I was gonna defeat those!"
"There's just no pleasing you, are there?" Trixie said.
Having vanquished everything in his way, the courageous pegasus moved his marker into the outermost border zone.
Rarity smiled with satisfaction at the accomplishment. "Okay, you're in one of the magical rifts, where the sprites are spawning, and you need to close it. However, you're facing forty-three regular parasprites, three Dazzlers, four Belchers, two Nibblers, and a Crusher, the last of which is even bigger than usual and looks like it can hurt you even without infecting. Are you ready to take them on?"
The pegasus contemplated his odds and came to a conclusion. "YEAH!" Bulk Biceps yelled.
"I told you we should use a strategy," Twilight admonished. "But no, you had to fly ahead and tackle them head-on. And now look at where that got you."
"Yeah, yeah…" Rainbow Dash muttered. "So I got knocked out a few times. I still don't regret it."
"Right…" Twilight muttered. She couldn't disagree with that, since having fun was the point of any game, but she preferred having fun while making good progress. "What's the situation on the rifts?"
"Most of them are closed," Starlight said. "I'm working on the north side, Trixie's working through the west, and the Crusaders are in between. The poison joke bombs I've been grinding in the forest are really good against the Crusher, by the way. Possibly a little too good. Overpowered, maybe?"
"Good point, thank you," Rarity said. "Maybe change that next time… how about a limit on how many you can carry?"
"And what's the situation on the midfield?" Twilight asked.
"We're cleaning up," Spike said proudly. "Some stragglers here and there, but nothing threatening."
"Why are you asking like you don't know, Sparkle?" Trixie asked. "You can see everything on the field."
"I like to have everypony up to date, okay?" Twilight said. "Okay, I attack the Crusher on my position with…" She looked at the card again. "'SCIENCE!', apparently. Exclamation mark and capital letters and all. Really, Rarity?"
"What can I say? It seemed like a fun idea," Rarity giggled. "Okay, the Crusher goes down, and your Cleave skill allows you to take out the remaining fourteen parasprites at the same time. Area clear."
"I seal the rift," Twilight said. "Everypony, let's finish this."
"Aw, we were gonna leave ours open so we could grind fer extra points," Apple Bloom said.
"Don't draw things out, Apple Bloom," Applejack said. "Ah knock out the remainin' ones over here in the Acres."
"South Ponyville's cleaned out like a bakery after a visit from Princess Celestia!" Derpy announced.
"That's the last ones gone in the west meadows," Spike announced.
Vinyl put her hooves together, and then yanked them apart to mimic an explosion. She grinned.
"Just a moment while The Great and Powerful Trixie vanquishes her foes," Trixie said. "And it's done. Rift closed."
"And I close up the last one here," Starlight said. She fell silent for a moment. "That's it, then? We won?"
"I think we did," Twilight said. "Good work, everypony."
"Ahem," Discord said.
"Yes, of course. Good work, every…" Twilight stopped. "Discord, did you actually do anything?"
He drew himself up. "Why, princess, I'm offended! Of course I did. I provided essential moral support for the team."
"Then why's yer bag chock full o' points like ya haven't spent any?" Applejack asked suspiciously.
"Ah-ah, not so fast, darlings," Rarity said. "Just when you thought you were done, an enormous shadow falls over the area…"
"Okay, this can't be good," Pinkie said.
"Understatement o' the month there, Pinkie," Applejack said.
"As the last rifts close, the gigantic… Ultimate Parasprite! Appears over the castle!" Rarity announced dramatically.
"'Ultimate Parasprite'?" Discord asked in dismay. "That's the best you could come up with?"
"Don't ruin the moment," Rarity said, annoyed. "Anyway, you must defeat it in order to win. And it has an actual health pool that you must reduce to zero, and it'll fight back. Oh, and if you lose all your health, you're out of the game completely, and if all the players are out, you lose. Have fun, darlings."
Twilight looked to her left, and then to her right. Unicorns, pegasi, earth ponies and other fellow players looked back with determination. She smiled grimly. "Let's do this."
Session 15.7 Alex Warlorn
"Twilight!" Rarity barged in, bright red in the face, and a look that could obliterate armies if looks could kill. "I need a royal edict to ban all tabloid news in Equestria!"
"… Rarity I'm not sure if I have that authority, I'll have to check the law books, a mortal pony becoming a Princess isn't exactly new, all Alicorns before me were born that way. So really-"
"Ugh! Twilight!" Rarity stomped her hoof on the crystal floor. Spike steering clear of his perfect beauty. "I don't have time for this! My reputation is being destroyed even as we speak!" Rarity took out the Equestria Inquirer. 'Element of Generosity Produces Racist Propaganda Games.'
"Wait… is this … this is about that stupid 'escape from the diamond dogs game? I thought that was settled."
"Yes, my fictionalized account of being kidnapped, and put into slave labor in the heart of Equestria 'offended' the Diamond Dog clans who were not even involved, and in retrospect was a gutless act of political correctness on our party… but the game is still selling well and being produced in Yakyakistan and Griffonstone … the Diamond Dogs found the griffins and the yaks a lot less quick to fold when it comes to being sued."
Twilight wondered just how legal action even WORKED for the Yaks… she likely didn't want to know… as for the griffins… she doubted they even had a legal system for suing, they didn't even have their currency, still using Equestrian bits.
"But that isn't the POINT darling! The point is that the rags, DO NOT CARE! They heard about the makers being sued for making a 'racist' game, which became a 'racist propaganda game', and of course since your brother's friends aren't very famous and don't make for juicy gossip, they decided to stamp me as the 'maker' even though all I did was provide my account and quality control!"
"Rarity, this is the tabloid, I HATE some of the things they've said about Celestia, but it always blows over."
"Like Gabby Gums 'blew over?'"
"That's…. complicated… the point is, no intelligent pony is actually believing this."
"I had a pony in Canterlot refuse to do business with me because he didn't want to be associated with a 'racist!'"
"Your Canterlot outlet is still doing good right?"
"Sassy is keeping things going smoothly now that she understands the concept of 'product diversity.' But DOESN'T end there Twilight! Not at all! Read the next page!"
"The next page?"
Twilight read it… her eyes widened… "This is… this is horrible… You're making a anti-zebra propaganda game?"
"NO I'M NOT YOU IDIOT!… I… Sorry Twilight, wait, no I'm not. Twilight! Somepony must have seen me chatting with Zecora when we had a debate over cross cultural fashion… I… I… It calls me he 'Element of Racist Propaganda!' What sick creature would invent such bucket of lies?!"
Spike offered helpfully. "Want me to get greedy and step on their news stand?"
"… I… no darling… thank you for offering Spikey-Wickey… but such a show of violence always back fires. And ultimately ENCOURAGES such ideas."
Twilight turned blue, then white, then her mane caught on fire. She'd read the article on her. "I AM NOT ENGAGING IN EVIL INEQUINE ALICORNIFICATION EXPERIMENTS! I have fifty years before you girls start dying of old age, my research into you becoming Alicorns are all scheduled for decades down the line, and I'd NEVER EVER DO THAT TO ANY LIVING CREATURE, let alone a close friend or a sapient equine!"
"Your planning what?" Rarity asked surprised.
"NEVER MIND! Forget you heard that! Spike! Take a letter for Celestia! And get a message to Zecora! The only way to fight misinformation is with real information… plus a trust worthy face… "
Session 15.8 Ardashir(OOC: Sequel to brutalityinc's idea.)
Shining Armor blinked. Poindexter, Gaffer, and 8-Bit all looked around the room as he slowly spoke, to be certain of the answers he was getting.
"So... little sis, the rest of you. You LIKE this idea?" He levitated the gamebook. It was done in blacks and crimsons save for one slit-pupil draconic eye at the center right under the title. NIGHTMARE: THE CORRUPTED. "I mean, you like this?"
"We sure as rootin' do," Applejack said, looking down at her character sheet with a laugh. "Heck, Dash, er, Ah mean 'Nightmare Manacle' an' me are keepin' a running score on how many o' those 'Oblivion minions' and other, nastier Nightmares we stop."
"Yeah, and speaking of which, 'Nightmare Mirror'," Dash smirked as she pointed down at her dice, "I beat those weird two-legged whatevers 'Nightmare Anthro' was sending at us. Looks like the Fiercest Loyalty beats the Harshest Truth. Again." She ducked as Applejack chucked a half-eaten fritter at her.
"But," Shining Armor looked around at them all. He flipped the book open to show them some of the art. "You ladies have fought a Nightmare. This game is about becoming one and what you do with that power! It's about how power without moral or ethical restraints corrupts and destroys! Deep and philosophical concerns..."
"You sure about that?" Pinkie snickered and pointed at the book. Shining looked and flushed to see an image of a very sexy Nightmare winking at the viewer. He gave Poindexter a furious glare. The scrawny pony wilted.
"Blast it, I thought I told you to tell the Art Director not to use that one, it gives ponies the wrong idea!"
"I did!" Poindexter yelped. "I mean, er, I'm sure I said something along those lines."
"Umm, yeah, well," Gaffer nervously scratched along his mane. "Remember, the Art Director is a minotaur. He said he doesn't really 'get' what makes pony mares attractive or not."
Shiny groaned as he envisaged the angry letters from furious mares. Possibly including his annoyed wife.
"It's no worse than some of the mare characters in your old comics, Shiny," Twilight grinned. "I still remember when you had a crush on Mistress Mare-velous." Upon noticing the dismayed look on Shiny's face, she perked up. "Oh, come on, BBBFF! Not every game gets received the way its creators intend. Besides, this game has a lighter side."
8-Bit looked at her in disbelief. "You're playing ponies one step up from Tartarus at best, and it has a lighter side?"
"Oh, yes," Fluttershy looked up from her side of the table. "You can try to redeem yourself by doing heroic or kindly things, like saving innocent ponies from monsters..."
"And you get cool powers to do it with," Dash chimed in. "Heck, sometimes when we're busting villains I wish I could tie them up with iron manacles forged from my tormented soul. It'd be easier than chasing them when they run away."
"You? Tormented?" Rarity shook her head. "Oh, but dear Poindexster, Gaffer, and 8-Bit, I appreciate the idea that non-ponies can go Nightmare as well in the game. Spike so loves my dragoness character, Nightmare Charity, doesn't he?" She laid her neck over Spike's shoulder in an equine hug, and the little drake flushed pink right through his scales.
"This wasn't what was supposed to happen." Shiny set his face in his forehooves and groaned. "But as long as you're happy -- wait, sis?" Twilight smiled at him. "I know I'll be sorry, but what Nightmare do YOU play? Some fiend that torments Equestria's foes forever?"
"What? No!" Twilight shook herself. "Well, it is kind of silly, but you're looking at Nightmare Librarian." Twilight flew up above the table. "Ponies who damage or let their books become overdue had best beware, or I'll make them all write 100,000 word essays on 'The Most Boring Things in Equestria'!"
As the mares broke up laughing, Shining Armor just left, his friends following him, and all looking for the nearest convenient rock to start beating their heads against.
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loved this chapter made me laugh multiple times,
Oh boy, Mina, honey, um, you REALLY think mentioning that in from of her is such a good idea? Trixie may be patient (sorta) but that's an easy way to get on her bad side.
No. No she does not.
Aye.
I'm with her, Starlight does need help, she's reformed, yes, but, it's not quite that easy, she's not like Luna or Discord who have eternity to adjust, she's a mortal pony, a strong one, but mortal nonetheless.
He tried to follow the Great Dragon Migration, however, the only ones there were adults who probably wouldn't care about him, and a gang of teenage idiotic bullies. Say what you will about that comic as a whole, but Mina is the best dragon role model Spike's got.
Took the words right out of my mouth.
If they're smart enough.
What up, MB? That, wasn't funny, was it?
... Eh?
... Oh. I, can't think of anything clever to say to that.
She doesn't exactly have hundreds if not thousands of years to practice her craft.
I'm guessing that's caviar for dragons. Anyway, don't try to eat them. I doubt it'll end well.
Smart.
That explains it.
She may not be the nicest around, but she has her ways of getting things done.
Let her have her fun.
In all fairness, he's so old you didn't really stand a chance to begin with.
She has a point.
At least Mina has a brain.
Capitalize.
Shooed.
That explains it. Anywho SAID the filly, like with the Pinkie 4th wall thing, I urge you to PROOFREAD!
Who knows?
DoomED.
I'd say go for it, no matter the game, if you can grind and get some better gear, DO IT.
Riiight.
Quite.
What's with the limp?
Applebuck Season.
Smart guy.
Applejack.
This will be good!
You morons think it's a good idea to drug one of a powerful Alicorn's friends?
Busting out the Drill Sergeant Shout, only thing comparable to the Royal Canterlot Voice AND the Full Name Ultimatum, he's mad.
What's so bad about it?
A Tower Defense?
Too overdone?
Probably not worth much too.
Yeah.
They'll figure something out.
I'd imagine.
Doesn't sound good.
I see.
I see.
Oh yeah.
Fluttershy's right.
You realize that that means that 3 times out of 4, it'll miss.
Yep.
She did warn you.
Oh god.
Oh GOD!
Quite.
Of course.
This is a Fall of Equestria thing. Not your most subtle take that.
Yep.
Fair enough.
Maybe.
Phew.
Maybe.
Would you have resisted doing the same thing with Fashion for Rarity if you were in her position?
Heh.
Agreed.
Well, Discord hasn't spent a thing, he could probably unleash a large amount of damage.
Now what?
Is this is Diamond Dogs thing?
Pity.
YIKES.
What a waste of food.
Heh.
The horror.
And suddenly I remember this fic....
....
Sigh... I'm with no inspiration... I have two ideas but no idea how to put them
1- FedEx give Twilight the wrong game... A Tyrant Celestia and how a group of mares try to rebel against her... Something that of course Twilight is not a big fan but Rainbow think it could be fun.
2- We reformed and used almost every villain and character but I think we forgot the Dazzlings, why not invite them to a game?
7025906
I didn't write that part.
7026364
Right, it's like the Pinkie 4th wall thing studio, the name of which I can never remember.
Nice to see the Overlord Babylon having some fun. Did not expect a Makai Kingdom reference in this story.
7026460 Ding ding ding! We have a winner!
It just keeps getting better!
I wonder, is Rarity's parasprite game based on the old Attack Of The Awful Green Things game?
7027257
Thanks!
I loved Mina nerding out over Trixie. She is a big comic book geek after all, I wonder if she's really a dragon version of Snips and Snails?
Rarity's parasprite game was also funny, mainly Rarity's creativity in every aspect of the game... except names. That added a touch of veracity for me.
7031988
That so?
Great story, criminal that it is not more popular. Favorited, followed and liked.
7035385
Thank you.
How about instead of Ultimate Parasprite, she could call it Parasprite King?
7046178
Heh. Fun.
7046207 What do you mean by that?
Sorry, but I can't help but read all of Uncle's dialog in Lo Wang's voice. (Shadow Warrior Redux currently on sale on gog, and Classic Complete edition is free).