Trailing Logic
Iroh, Cadence, and Zuko calmly walked into the small mountain village together, wearing Earth kingdom colors with the hoods up so Zuko and Iroh could hide their topknots. "So...why are we here again?" Iroh asked, having only the faintest idea behind the reasons for Zuko's decision to change course. Ever since Zuko had led the mission to the Fire Temple alone, he'd begun to be more independent of Iroh and Cadence's advice, happy to divide the decision making progress. While Iroh was happy Zuko was showing such independence, it did leave him in the dark quite a bit. Zuko seemed to take a perverse pleasure in giving Iroh directives that only made sense in hindsight. ...he couldn't be more proud of his nephew.
"See the mountain?" Zuko indicated. "It erupted less than a week ago, but the village is still here. Short of powerful Earth Benders with a great deal of foresight, that means the Avatar was here when it erupted."
Looking up, Iroh noticed a very unusual rock formation around the edge of the village towards the volcano. Volcanic rock rose upward in a dome shape, ending in claw like protrusions. "I wonder what could have caused that?" Iroh inquired.
"It looks a bit like surf frozen just as it breaks against a rock," Cadence pointed out.
"Or magma cooled against a dome of air?" Zuko suggested.
Iroh stroked his chin thoughtfully as Cadence gasped in surprise. "And...we left our soldiers well outside the village, why?"
"Because we're here as investigators, not invaders," Zuko explained.
"And that's why we're in Earth colors!" Cadence proclaimed with quiet pride. "Because they're more likely to talk to strangers than enemies."
"Exactly," Zuko agreed as he led them past a large house.
The door opened practically in his face, and a young girl in a pink kimono, her brown hair done in pigtails and missing a front tooth, smiled up at them. "Prince Zuko, General Iroh, Aunt Wu's been expecting you." She gestured inside.
"So much for that," Iroh muttered as Zuko, resigned, led them inside.
As they sat down on cushions, the young girl brought them some tea and bean curd. After a time, an old woman with graying hair and wearing an unusual symbol on her forehead stepped out from the inner chamber. "General, if you would enter now?"
Seeing Zuko nod, Iroh stood and entered the inner chamber. After a time, he came back out. "Well?" Zuko asked.
"She is a fortune teller," Iroh replied. "And she gives...very unusual predictions. She did confirm that Aang and his friends were here, though."
"Unusual predictions?" Cadence inquired.
Iroh nodded, rubbing his chin as he pondered. "She said I would find true love again...in my second life."
"Your Highness?" Aunt Wu called out.
Frustrated, Zuko followed her into the inner chamber. "Which way did Aang go when he left?" he demanded intently.
"Up," Aunt Wu replied easily. "Patience, young Prince. You've been doing so well so far." She gestured to a bowl filled with bones. "Choose one," she instructed.
Zuko rolled his eyes. He didn't believe in fortune telling, but if humoring the old woman would get him more answers, he wasn't going to turn up his nose at it. Seeing a bone that caught his interest for some reason, he pulled it from the bowl.
"Now, throw it into the fire, and its cracks will tell me your future."
Sitting down, Zuko tossed the bone into the flames. To his surprise, a large crack split the bone almost immediately, and it exploded in a burst of black smoke not long after.
Aunt Wu stared into the smoke and fragments. "You need not worry overmuch about finding the Avatar," she stated calmly at last. "Your path is intertwined with his. A crossroads is coming, and the decision you make will determine the fate of the entire world."
Zuko blinked, shivering as he shook off the spell. "I don't suppose it gave you any details as far as when?"
"Your decision will be made by the last day of Spring," she replied. "And the world's fate set in stone before Summer's end."
Zuko shook off the gravity of that proclamation with difficulty. "Are you sure that's my fortune?" he asked finally. "And not my Uncle's?"
"No, that's definitely your fortune," Aunt Wu replied. "Though I admit the General's was equally surprising in its own way."
"But Uncle's the one who was sent the Spirit Creature to care for," Zuko pointed out. "He's the one with destiny on his-"
"Spirit Creature?" Aunt Wu demanded. "I saw no such being!"
Zuko stared at her for a time, then relaxed completely. "That's going to make it hard to read her fortune," he replied, the awe and fear the performance had inspired pushed aside by what Aunt Wu hadn't predicted.
At that moment, Cadence stuck her head in. "Is it my turn now?" she asked eagerly.
Aunt Wu stared at Cadence, her jaw working soundlessly.
Zuko chuckled. "If you really want to. Just throw a bone into the fire, and she'll read the cracks." He slowly stood up.
Smiling widely, Cadence seized one of the bones in her magic and tossed it into the fire. What she didn't realize was that her own magic was still clinging to the bone as it entered the fire.
The citizens of the village were startled as Aunt Wu's house was blown 50 feet into the air on a massive plume of smoke before landing back on its own foundations. However, most of them went about their business, assuming that if it was important, Aunt Wu would tell them.
The only exception was a particular produce merchant bewailing the fate of his cart and product. Aunt Wu had predicted this would be a very bad year for him, and as a fragment of bone had knocked part of the volcanic rock onto his cart, it seemed she was right.
Aunt Wu stared at Cadence as the smoke cleared. "You are not of this world," she stated bluntly. "Your presence warps the weft of the Loom of Fate, and what once was impossible is now inevitable, and what once was inevitable is now impossible. And you bring bad luck to cabbages."
Cadence tilted her head in confusion at the very oddly specific declaration after such an explosive reading. "So...what about my future love life?"
A fragment of bone spun down and stuck in the wall next to Aunt Wu's ear. Turning, she examined it. "...you haven't already found your soulmate yet," she stated after a time.
"What?" Zuko demanded in confusion.
"That's the best I've got," Aunt Wu replied. "My art's meant for humans of this world. She's neither. It's stretched to its limits as is."
Groaning, Zuko headed back to his troops and ship, writing the trip off as a waste of time.
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Cabbage guy must be like. What are the odds!
The cabbage guy is gonna be the equivalent to Zero's booblights, huh?
Who am I to complain? DRIVE THAT JOKE TO THE GROUND!
That cabbage merchant just can't catch a break, can he?
Very well done chapter.
i.memeful.com/memes/dvNy3Od/Super-Cool-Ski-Instructor.jpg
I agree. What?
6618102
It's hard to speak in tenses that your language hasn't invented.
6618051
Those cabbages will not be driven to the ground. Or rather, not MERELY to the ground. Those cabbages will be so far down, that when they will find oil, mole men, crab people, magma, lava, love, true love, false love, familial love, camaraderie love, true love again, cannibal carrots, three sets of board games accompanying a mournful sock-puppet lost in a world it does not understand, one continent-sized city of civil diamond dogs, and finally erupt from the crust of the world again as a SECOND chuck of obsidian from that first eruption finally pins the final patch of cabbages to an orphanage.
And thus, the Cabbage Patch Kids were founded.
I know it's only vaguely relevant, but I went to a con recently, and there was a guy dressed as the cabbage merchant. He had a whole basket of them with him and posed with the most wonderful expression of horror when you asked for a picture.
A fun little side track. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
6618126 you know, I always wondered where they came from.
The poor Cabbage merchant
I wonder how Cadence will approach Shining Armor
6618102
She got de-aged and sent to Iroh but before she was de-aged she was already married to Shining Armor.
Cabbage vending, cabbage vending never changes.
Of course. TO be fair, with how cryptic you tend to be, it's normal that he enjoys being cryptic as well.
Possibly.
So much for that.
Uh huh...
Oh?
Oh boy.
... Wow.
Poor guy.
I, see.
The part where Aunt Wu's house went up with a bang cracked me up.
Another enjoyable chapter. Good job.
So looks like once Iroh shifts off his mortal coil in the Avatar verse he's going over to Equestria or at least that's what I'd wager, and Zuko managed to get some actual times for his fortune, that's rather fortunate.
6618309 Nah, my bits say that at the end of this, Iroh and Bruce Wayne are gonna have something in common.
Poor cabbage man
6618346 I think he'd have more in common with Celestia than Luna myself.
Also...
...Celestia?
Pffft ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!! Cadence blew Auntie Wu's house up into the air and destroyed the cabbage sellers cabbages! Bad years for cabbages indeed! Heh.
6618364 Not what I meant, what does Luna do to Bruce?
Calling it now: Iroh gets reincarnated as a pony in Equestria and Cadence ships him with Celestia.
Also, timey-wimey shenanigans make fortune telling difficult for one main reason in particular: grammar.
Mi Amore Cadenza aka the Alicorn of Love and Cabbage Bane.
6618397 Luna turned Bruce into a pony at the end of Batmare
6618046 MY CABBAGES!!! You really are bad luck!
6618051 BEAT IT LIKE A DEAD CABBAGE!!!
6618366 He could do it fast, or he could it thorough and completely. This is Silk, he usually goes for the latter.
6618515 Exactly.
6618397 True enough.
6618531 Love your avatar picture, BTW. That little rapscallion is always getting into trouble. AJ just ain't having the best day, either.
6618579 Thank you.
It's a scene from Friendship is Showtime, go read it. Now.
6618665 Cool
LOL
The cabbage merchant is doomed.
Wonder what'll happen with the bounty hunter they meet... what was her name? The one with the sniffing creature that can follow any scent?
6618716
You mean the one who tracked via the necklace Zuko already returned to Katara?
You know, with so many different stories and what not, im surprised he hasnt done one on starcraft yet. That would be awesome!
MY CABBAGES!
Also, I wonder...
6618949 brassica will be vengeful of the avatar and the little pony princess.
Trailing Logic? More like Trolling Logic. If only Zuko could see the amount of grief Aunt Wu's predictions caused Aang and Katara. Or the amount of frustration she caused poor Sokka.
6618051 Not like we can really... Leaf him alone right?
Aunt Wu, if I didn't know any better I'd say that Cadance has a bone to pick with you on your fortune telling.
Well, at least the villagers didn't think that Aunt Wu's place didn't... Go up in smoke.
Soon Zuko is going to have to make a decision and... Spring into action.
6618046
The odds are 1.
...
...
...
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That last bit with Cadence's Love Life was just PERFECT!! <3
6618144 ooh do you have a pic of this? I'd like to see it
6619309 Yes, but my phone is stubbornly refusing to give it up. Once I figure out what it's problem is, I'll put it right up for all to enjoy.
Another enjoyable chapter. Also, I laughed a bit at the huge explosion Cadences bone caused. XD
6618144
I think I remember that guy! I had the strangest urge to smack the cabbages out of his hands as he walked by me.
Dude dude dude, awesome chapter well done! :D hehehe, this was greatness and I approve
Keep it up!
6618144 This is why I love cons (never been but you understand) cause of people like that
I bet that was awesome!
hehehe.
6618430 He is reincarnated as Shining Armor.