In the future, you will read this story. You will read how strange it is. You will read about Big Macintosh and his future date with Fluttershy, the shyest pony in Ponyville. You will read about how it is going to go down. You will read about how Fluttershy and Big Macintosh are totally awkward together. You will read it. You will wonder how the narrator knows that you will read it. You will figure it out that the author is writing this in the craziest writing style you will ever think of: second person omniscient future tense.
Chapters (1)
you're right, this was weird... but i still like it dude!
As the second(if you don't include yourself that is) reader of this story all I have to say was that was lots of fun to read
-added note-- apparently I am a slow reader...
'Second person omniscient future tense' worked quite well and I can see it as a lead-up to the actual event. Good one!
FWIW, too many sentences start with "you". It makes what should be hilarious very boring to slog through.
It Baffles The Mind - Priestess
I half-expected the story to end with a good ol' 4chan greentext "You are breathing manually now" thing. And as advertised, that was bizarre, and gave me a headache.
Mmm... Experimental fiction.
Can't say I'd read an entire book of it, but it was certainly entertaining and interesting.
You know, this story... wasn't actually half bad. I have to agree with Kits here, you could have spiced up the wording a bit. Additionally, the break in the fourth wall there in the middle was just completely unneeded (the initial framing parts addressed to the reader were fine, but that one parenthetical in the middle of the story proper was jarring). As for the tense... it was clearly used just to be unique, rather than for actual narrative purposes, but you didn't do a bad job with it.
Overall, a solid story. Novel style, though the subject matter is a bit trite. I can't in good consciousness call it a "good" story, but it was worth a read for the novelty.
I don't know what jarring parenthetical in the middle you are talking about...
Also, I tried to edit the story in such a way that there wouldn't be as many 'you's at the beginning of sentences, but it is kind of hard. You kind of need a lot of you's in a second person narrative. There aren't really any other pronouns one can use (without switching into other languages or dialects as I did towards the end). I hope this makes it easier to read. If it does not, well, I don't care. This is a stupid story and I don't really care what y'all think about it, so deal with it.
Second-person omniscient future tense. So this whole fic was basically this huge prologue. Eh, not bad.
This reads as if Doc Scratch wrote fanfiction.
I guess, what I mean to say is, it could use "S U C K E R" in white-on-white at the end.
I love it.
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Please write more!
Hahahaha a lot of Big MacXFluttershy fanfic stories
My head hurts, I think I like it. I will favorite...I need stop reading fanfiction a while
That was fun!!
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I need to read more of it.
I'm ashamed to say it, but I just got far enough in Homestuck to understand that.
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How did I miss that?
I need to reread Homestuck
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YES, yes you do.
Myself, you are going to read the weirdest, most craziest, and most cutest fanfic you have ever seen in all of you months of pony fic reading. In fact you're going to love this fic so much that you will write a comment is the same style of writing as used in the fic you are about to commence reading, and in that comment you will compliment the author of this crazy and cute fic for coming up with this weird writhing style of "Second person omniscient future tense" and you will recommend this fic to a lot of people in the future(and I mean the actual future) for their dose of pony fic reading.
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Well that just sums up the entire story right there.
Eeyup, it sure does.
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I read this story a while ago and just reread it. I think I found a way to make it not sound as weird as a story. What you have to do is read it as if you are a stage director in a play giving the characters what they need to do. When I read it out loud like that ( the rhymes were hard to say out loud sometimes) it made a bit too much sense.
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Drats. It's not meant to make sense.
Also, on a totally different note:
The nice guys at the Living Library made a video of them reading this story out loud. So check it out if you're illiterate.