Fourth
"Huh," said Spike.
Twilight's smile felt more ill-fitting than one of Rarity’s fancier hats, the kind with all the swirling ribbons and streaming feathers. She’d walked back from Fluttershy's place, her insides too churned up for flying, and the first thing she’d seen on stepping through the castle’s front door had been Spike walking past with a comic book tucked under one arm. "Hey, Twilight," he’d said. "What’s up?"
The panic bursting through her had made her yell "Nothing!" so loudly, the word had echoed up and down the crystal hallways for a good five seconds.
Spike arched an eyeridge. "You know that when you say 'nothing' like that, it usually means 'something', right?" he asked.
"Oh, now, Spike!" She wanted to laugh nonchalantly, but she wasn't at all sure she'd be able to stop if she got started. "How can 'nothing' mean 'something'? I mean, that's a logical impossibility!"
The silence that followed was even worse than the echoing shout. "Okay," Spike said. "But if you're planning a surprise party for me, tell Pinkie I really liked those little crunchy amethyst bits she had at the last one." He nodded and continued on toward the castle's east wing.
It took another several seconds before Twilight's heart had settled enough to let her hear anything other than it pounding. Scrambling then toward the west wing and the door to her study, she shoved it open with her magic, slid inside, shut it, and leaned back against it.
Because if Rarity really was in love with Big Mac, where did that leave Spike?
After all, Twilight had been standing right there the very first moment Spike had set eyes on Rarity and had watched those eyes turn into hearts, an effect she'd only read about previously in neurological studies of love and affection. And yes, the little guy was growing into a fine young drake, but still, she had to wonder how he might react when he found out that Rarity's heart possibly belonged to another.
Big Mac was a friend of his, too: at least, he headed over to Sweet Apple Acres now and again to talk hoofball with him and some of the town's other stallions. Would Spike see this as a betrayal of some sort? Would it get him upset at both Rarity and Mac?
Her midsection tightened, and she pushed away from the door with a stomp of her hoof. Something else to add to the negative column concerning this whole love thing: it might very well cause friendships to fray. And that had it encroaching onto her territory.
Although... Maybe that would be another way to approach Cadance and actually get some answers from her....
Moving to her desk, Twilight focused her horn on the section of shelves where she kept the notebooks she'd started keeping on the subject of love. She set the books in their proper order on her blotter pad, picked up her quill pen—
And before she knew it, a knock at the door was startling her from the notes she'd been making about the day's events. "Dinner time!" Spike called.
She got through the onslaught of Spike's less-than-subtle questioning while they ate by pretending that she actually was hiding a surprise party from him—if whatever happened tomorrow broke his heart, maybe some of those amethyst bits would help—and on the way back to her study afterwards, she stopped before the big doors to the throne room, sighed, and used her magic to push them soundlessly open.
Inside, the map table sat dark and silent. So whatever was making her wings as prickly as the strange winds that sometimes gusted out of the Everfree, it wasn’t a friendship problem as far as the Tree of Harmony was concerned...
With a shake of her head, she headed back to the kitchen, helped Spike finish the dishes, then told him she’d decided to turn in early. Her lack of any real plan for the next day kept her tossing and turning longer than usual, but she didn’t remember any dreams when she woke, the autumn morning sunlight rustling her curtains as crisply as newly-fallen leaves.
At breakfast, when she told Spike she was expecting Applejack, Rainbow, and Pinkie and asked him to show them into her study as soon as any of them arrived, he said, "You bet!" and gave her a wink. She managed not to roll her eyes in response, but it was even harder to keep from galloping into her book-lined sanctuary, locking the door, and pretending she wasn't there.
As usual, though, a few hours working on her notes slowed her breathing enough to let a certain calmness settle over her. And the plan that came to her as she was reshelving Gemstone's classic work Understanding the Psychology of Romantic Love, well, it seemed the only possible option. It didn't stop her feathers from rustling—her wings seemed even more tingly today than they'd been last night—but by the time Spike was knocking on the door and opening it to let Rainbow flap in, Twilight was as ready as she figured she was going to be.
"Well?" Rainbow asked. "What's the word?"
But Twilight cut her off before she could go on. "Thanks, Spike. Say, could you maybe head back out to the front door and see if the others are here yet?"
Spike smirked. "Fine. I'll just let you two get on with your top-secret plans." He waggled his claws like quotation marks as he said those last words.
Rainbow was blinking, but Twilight forced another smile until Spike had gone out, closing the door behind himself.
Twilight let her smile droop, and Rainbow didn't look all that happy, either, folding her front legs over her chest. "What's all that about?" she asked.
With a sigh, Twilight tried to stretch some of the tightness from her shoulders. "You know how Spike's always felt about Rarity."
That got a snort, Rainbow tossing her mane. "The whole town knows that."
"Well, if it turns out Rarity's really in love with Big McIntosh—"
"She is." Rainbow smirked, but then her eyes widened, and her smirk faded. "Oh. Yeah." She gave a couple blinks, then waved a hoof. "Well, he'll get over it. I mean, he's just a kid, Twi; he'll prob'bly wanna be ring-bearer at their wedding."
"Wedding?" Twilight couldn't keep from shouting it, what felt like every hair in her mane bristling up.
"Wedding?" Applejack's voice asked from the doorway, and Twilight snapped her head over to see her and Spike standing there.
"Really?" Spike was blinking, his forehead wrinkled. "Is that the surprise? Well, okay, I guess, but...who's getting married?"
Not for the first time, Twilight found herself wishing she hadn't already used her chance at Starswirl's time travel spell. "Nopony!" she said, aiming the word as forcefully as she could at Rainbow.
"Yeah!" Pinkie hopped in past Applejack and Spike. "Rarity and Big Mac haven't even had their first date yet! It's way too early to be talking about their wedding!"
Twilight's throat squeezed shut tighter than the wild Everfree snapdragons she'd been studying in the castle's greenhouse; all she could do was stare as Spike blinked some more. "Rarity?" he asked. "And Big Mac? But...but that's impossible! She's a—! And he's nothing but a—!"
"Whoa, now!" Applejack glared down at the little dragon. "Nothing but a what?"
All Spike's spines had wilted, his eyes wide and focused on Applejack. "A great guy! The best! Everypony knows that! But him and Rarity? How could—? I mean, why would—? I mean—" He took a step back, his face suddenly making Twilight think of crumpled paper. "I...I've gotta go. I...I can't—"
Shaking off her paralysis, Twilight wrapped her magic around him before he could do more than turn. "We don't know, Spike!" She lifted him gently from the floor, brought him into the room so she could look directly into his eyes, and went on: "Rainbow and I saw Big McIntosh and Rarity talking for a while in the market yesterday, and Rainbow's convinced that that means the two of them are—" Her mind jittered, trying to find a way to say it; she finally went with "—interested in each other."
"Yeah!" Pinkie flexed her lips like a goldfish. "Maybe even compound interested!"
"What?" The anguish in Spike's face was slowing melting into something sharper. "That's it?" He flailed his arms, Twilight wincing when his claws smacked the inside of the bubble she still had him floating in. "News flash, guys: ponies talk to each other all the time! And y'know what it hardly ever means? That they're in love!"
"All the time, huh?" Rainbow was looking at the floor off to Spike's right. "Even Big Mac?" she asked quietly.
Spike froze, and Applejack cleared her throat. "And much as I hate adding fuel to Rainbow's fire, when Mac got home yesterday, he was, well, he's always pretty chipper, but last night—" She shook her head. "He was humming and smiling; heck, he even did a little shuffling dance in the kitchen while we were putting the supper dishes away!" She shuffled one of her own hooves at the floor. "And that ain't something he usu'lly does."
In the silence that followed, Twilight tried desperately to think of something—anything!—to say, but Rainbow spoke before Twilight could even start. "Look, Spike." Rainbow's gaze came up from the floor, and Twilight saw the same gentle sadness there that she'd seen yesterday. "If Mac's found a pony he likes—or, y'know, if Rarity has—it's up to us to be there and support them, right? 'Cause we're their friends, and that's what friends do. And you are Mac and Rarity's friend, aren't you, Spike?"
The silence this time seemed a little less stunned, a little less frosty. And when Spike sighed and said, "Yeah, I...I am," Twilight almost puffed out a relieved breath of her own. His snout scrunched up a little then. "But they still could've been, I dunno, trading embarrassing stories about Applejack, right? I mean, Mac has some doozies he's told us guys at Hoofball Night, so—"
"He what?" Applejack's shout nearly knocked Twilight over.
Pinkie giggled from where she sat pulling books from the shelves and stacking them into a pile shaped like Princess Celestia. "Yeah, his stories are pretty good, aren't they?" she asked.
Applejack's jaw was clenched so hard, Twilight was sure it was jutting out at a perfect right angle to the rest of her face. "Might be that varmint'll be wearing a full body cast on his first date with Rarity!"
"Simmer down." With a grin, Rainbow jumped into a hover. "Hey! I think that's the first time I've ever gotten to say that to you!"
Snorting, Applejack pulled her hat over her eyes and leaned sideways against the wall. "Let's get on with all this, how 'bout?"
"Yeah!" Rainbow turned her grin toward Twilight. "So what's the plan, huh? Ninja suits after midnight? Sneaking into Rarity's attic and keeping her under surveillance till we get the skinny?"
Shaking her head, Twilight let her magic settle Spike back onto the floor. "We ask her," she said.
"Ask her?" From the blank look on Rainbow's face, Twilight was pretty sure the idea had never even occurred to her.
"Yes." Twilight planted her hooves firmly and looked around at all four of her friends. "We ask her what's going on and if there's anything we can do to help. And if she says there's nothing going on or nothing we can do to help, then we tell her we're there for her if she needs us, and we let the whole thing drop."
Rainbow dropped to the floor with clattering thump. "But that's not—! She isn't—! How can you possibly think that'll—?"
"The direct approach." Applejack was nodding. "Reckon that'd be for the best, all right."
"Um-hmmm!" Pinkie had a pencil in her mouth and was drawing a googly-eyed Celestia face on a sheet of parchment paper attached to the top of her book sculpture. She spit the pencil out and gave Twilight a smile. "And asking'll be the easiest way to find out what kind of cake she wants for her bachlorette party, too."
"I'm in," Spike said from where he stood, the quiver in his voice so slight, Twilight didn't think anypony else would've noticed. "'Cause you're right, Rainbow. She needs to know her friends are there for her whether it's good news or...or bad news."
Twilight had to swallow against the lump in her throat. She nodded to Spike, then turned to Rainbow. "We all have to agree," she said. "Remember?"
For half a heartbeat, Twilight thought Rainbow was going to object, her face as cloudy as the morning before a rainstorm. But— "Fine!" she practically spat out. "We'll go over there and ask her!"
The thought popped into Twilight's head. "Except she's at the spa with Fluttershy right now."
"So?" Rainbow leaped for the door, Applejack and Spike both ducking out of her way. "We'll bust into her front room and wait for them there!"
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If Applejack is going to have a sister-in-law she is damn well gonna make sure her brother isn't going to make her an aunt apparently.
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Is it:
"Flutterjack" or "Appleshy"? I think that's why they're such a rare pairing.
Mike
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Not exactly:
Rarity in the following song written by Dave Frishberg and performed here by Diana Krall, but still...
Mike
6721771 AJ's comment about Mac being in a cast has nothing to with Rarity. She's saying he's gonna get it for telling embarrassing stories about her.
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What happened in the past:
Will have to remain in the past. We're galloping full-steam into the future!
Mike
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Yeah:
A Twilight plan might actually get measurable results, but a Rainbow plan tends to be more fun to write about. At least, more verbs are involved.
Mike
6719431
More hints and teases:
Are on their way!
Mike
6722167 And that's why the best ships are ApplePie and Twinkie. Or maybe that's just because it's almost lunchtime.
A cute story, with whacky misunderstanding-shenanigans that are a hallmark of many a good romantic comedy.
One thing occurs to me: Everyone seems to be analyzing Big Mac and Rarity's compatibility and mutual interests and why they would be holding a conversation in the first place, and no one has brought up the fact that they are both members of the Ponytones. Has the band broken up or something?
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Yes, I know. I'm saying that being in a full body cast because he told embarrassing stories would help that cause (even unintentionally!). And of course I threw the word "if" in there because nothing is as it seems anyway. I could have worded it a little better looking back on it, but too late now.
Cause that's what good friends do! They break into your house, ready to interrogate you about your private life!
All kidding aside, this story is pretty fun and everyone seems in character enough...Y'know, cept Rainbow but I'm sure her back story'll be explained.
Keep on keepin' on!
6722343 I laughed WAY too hard at this joke!
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Eeep!
I forgot all about the Ponytones! I'll go in and add them to the reasons Twilight gives in chapter one.
Thanks!
Mike
Wow. Well played, Spike. Like a. ****ing ROCK.
Funny how the kid probably too young to really be in love in the first place takes likely rejection so much better than Rarity herself.
Thank you, Pinkie, for always speaking your mind, even when it's a terrible idea and your mind is an insane cluster of bright lights and sugar. Shine on, you crazy mare, you.
And leave it Rainbow Dash to be absolutely INTENT on being reckless and irresponsible about this matter. Even if they decide to do it the direct, sensible way, by Celestia, she WILL manage to overdo it!
Upgraded from tracking to faved.
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Oh you tease you.
Relatively good on you Spike for apparently coming around so quickly, but that immediate reaction nearly took this whole thing south.
Heh.
So in the end the plan of the hour is a combination of both of what Twilight "Straightforward" Sparkle and Rainbow "Break into someone's house!" Dash wanted. Compromise!