When Spike is rescued by a mare wearing the Mysterious Mare Do Well costume, he is smitten in love with her.
Meanwhile, the Mane Six learn that the Mysterious Mare Do Well costume was stolen. Who is the mare that has stolen both the costume and Spike's heart?
Mare Do Well just took Spike lip virginity!!!
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Not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but i hope you like it.
trying to narrow down who Mare Do Well might be. and even though I don't know who it is just yet, I have taken a few ponies off the list.
its not any of the mane six, and its definitely not a filly so the cmc are out.
but I do look forward to figuring out who Mare Do Well might be.
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Don't worry, i am sure people will enjoy who it is.
:)
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Darn it, how did you deduce that, you clever genius?
Nah, i am just teasing. It's not Luna.
Reading the description, it doesn't quite work with you saying Spike's name twice. I think it would sound better like this
or
Just thought i'd offer that
Errr, he's always been mistreated, insulted and teased.
Other than that... it was cute, but I think you really trying a bit too hard to pity Spike. I mean, he might be a baby, but he didn't hesitate to fight the Diamond Dogs in A Dog and Pony show, so why would he here? He's no wimp.
its not Sweetie belle is it.
Can do magic, stronger then earth ponies and fly swifter then a pegasus huh? That narrows it down to three ponies; Luna, Cadance, and Celestia.
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It's not a filly
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Could be?
6301495 yeah I didn't really think it would be a filly. I just said Sweetie belle because if anyone knew about Rarity's vault and whats inside of it, it would probably be her.
but personally I think it might be Queen Chrysalis or one of the Alicorn princesses. but only if the Alicorn princess's can somehow change there size to fit in the costume. other wise I'm leaning more towards it being Chrysalis because she can actually change her size.
My guess:
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Could be, or is it? O.O
It could do with a bit of formatting / editing perhaps, as it had an awkward sort of feel to a certain extent but it's an interesting idea so far as a story premise goes. Following for now.
Another great chapter, keep it up:)
I really like how the mysterious mare could really be anypony and how they are seemingly close to the Mane 6. Hmmmmmm? Who could steal Rarity's costumes without her noticing and get her hooves on some of the Apple family's special rope as well? Really cool stuff, can't wait for the next chapter :)
Idk about the costumes being stolen without being noticed, and my brain (for some odd reason) tells me it's apple bloom because of the rope Wich dos'nt make any sense at all. I am so confused
A mare who loves Spike from afar and care for his safety way more than the Mane 6.
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Good, my confusion will eat you up inside MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Twilight is being a right bitch. what is wrong with somepony liking Spike. why people see her as Spike's mother, I'll never know.
as for mare do well. it has to be chrysalis or Luna. there the only two I can think of that make logical sense. I'm pretty sure both of them could go steal something in someone's house undetected. Luna with her shadows and chrysalis with her ability to change into anypony.
6323575 true
Damn it, I already can't wait for the next chapter
I have a feeling Twilight and Spike are gonna get into a bit argument. I also think Spike with have an argument with Rarity too, anyway great chapter.
Derpy or flutters maybe, Aloe. Only mares in show that actually seem like the type. Also who are named and not already in a relationship or too professional to be vigilantes. Vinyl and Octavia are too high profile.
Applebloom?
Well, it would have to be an adult to fit the suits, probably someone who had at least some interaction with Spike, not one of the Mane 6 but with access to the Apple farm...
GRANNY SMITH!
...Hold on, I just urked a bit...
Sorry, but my guess is as good as any, and since it's probably a unicorn or earth pony, my shot in the dark would be Screw Loose, one of her personalities is a Super Hero
Well, she certainly treats Spike nicer than anyone else.
Also Flutters didn't show up at end of chapter like everone else.
My guess is Moondancer, for some odd reason
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What makes you think that?
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No idea, maybe the books, instruments, possible potions,and various 'devises'. If I thought it were viable, I'd think it were a second twilight, and Moondancer is as close to that as we have
Il go for Princess Luna
No clue.
Whoever is the new MDW, she might be someone who understands what Spike is going through and hated being called monsters.
MDW should drag Spike somewhere for private dance(the romantic kind not the perverted one)
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That is a good idea,
Hopefully not a perverted one. Otherwise, i would have to change the rating of my story.
Twilight is taking this way too personally. It's almost as if she doesn't want Spike to have a life outside of being her assistant.
it seems like Twilight has built up aggression towards Rarity, for how she treated Spike.
but instead of being mad at the pony who actually hurt Spike, she's taking her anger out on someone who doesn't deserve it. . . and Rarity is the one who Twilight needs to give a piece of her mind to, not someone who actually cares for Spike.
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That would make a great episode for MLP:FIM.
6347667 That narrows it down some...Only mares i can think of off the top of my head are Trixie, Sunset Shimmer, or Luna. Since i don't know the time frame, i can't rule out Trixie or Sunset It'd be interesting to see this continue in the direction its going.
If I could critique this writing, it doesn't have a whole lot of voice. Voice is adjectives, showing not telling, and describing. It seemed to mostly tell, not a bad story by default because of that, but if you can add voice, it will make the characters ten times better.
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That's probably one of the many flaws of my writing.
6440807 If you want, I can proofread all of your chapters, and send it back to you, so you can copy the version I fixed, and paste it as the new one.
Make more. I like it so far.
You should totally start updating this again. This is one of the most original ideas ive seen on FIMFiction in months
So since this isn't gonna be continued, who was she?
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Calamity mane