• Member Since 16th May, 2015
  • offline last seen January 6th

Lise Eclaire


If you happen to cry, I will be there. If you happen to smile, will you do the same for me?

E

When Twilight receives a letter from one claiming to be a changeling, she is shocked. As she starts reading, however, she soon learns that there is far more to it than she ever suspected.

Reading by Goombasa.

The story had been translated to Russian: Here and Here

Special thanks to PoisonClaw for editing.

For the Weekly Prompt (changelings) of the Hazardous Writing Materials and Challenges

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 233 )

Eh, not bad.

The core concept is really intriguing, then although it ended in a good point for a one-shot, it also make one wonder what will happen next :twilightsmile:

What will happen with Spider Web now? Can Twilight help her? How would her original family react? The Rest of the Mane6? The other Princesses? Lots of questions...:pinkiesmile:

Wanderer D
Moderator

This was a cute little story. Needs a bit of editing, but it was a good job regardless! Keep writing!

Pretty good one shot. Ending could of used a bit more work... but overall very well done.:twilightsmile:

6284062 Thanks :))

6284090 Well, one never knows :) Glad you liked it! Btw can you PM me your spoiler question (for some reason can't make it visible on tablet :( ) and I'll try to answer best I could :)

6284094 Thanks! :D Happy you enjoyed it :) Will reread it in a few days once it's no longer fresh in my mind and try to fix things O:)

6284130 Yay, thanks :) Ending was a bit tricky. Went through a few attempts... Then decided to keep it simple(r). O:)

6284859 It was a good story, but what happened to "that" Silver Spoon then?

6285062

Glad you enjoyed :)
Which Silver Spoon? The one in the series is fine and well, and a bit overfed (reason why she is so mean most of the time :)). Spider Web... Haven't thought about it to be honest. I guess she will come now and again to look at things from afar? :)

Bonus: the changeling at the E100 wedding was in fact Silver Spoon in real form, since she wasn't invited :P (or at least is according to my theory :P)

I like the concept, and I don't think the writing is as rough as some others have said. There are some obvious typos, like "Celestial," but otherwise it's honestly better than most.

I did find the choice of character a bit of a strange decision, though. Just not the sort I can imagine anyone having all that much love for, you know what I mean? It works in the context you give it, but still, I think it might have made more sense to use someone less high-profile and well-defined instead.

6285113 Ah, thank you :)) Glad you enjoyed. I better get to fixing the errors asap... :D

Silver Spoon was mostly chosen because of the saying. As the story goes, it was the initial family that was selected, so they had no idea what she would turn out to be. On a personal note, I prefer her to Diamond Tiara. :) Maybe one day we will see her parents in an episode :D

I liked it.

6285436 Many thanks :)) The hive mother appreciates the snack :D

Like 6284094 said. I like the concept and I thought the story was rather cute. Just a bit more touching up on some typos, maybe a bit of polishing, and I'd have no complaints. Still, though, I enjoyed reading through it.

Take a like.

6286824 Thanks :))) Very glad you enjoyed :D
(Trying to get it out of my head so I can re-edit properly... O:)) Things really happened fast :D

Wow, this was really good- is there a possibility for a sequel?

6286906 Thanks :)
Quite probably yes, although must catch up on some other things before that :D

OK, I saw that others have already said this, but...

Why SIlver Spoon?

To be frank, the buildup was excellent, but having the replaced pony be Silver Spoon frankly felt like a missstep.

If it was an age thing, wouldn't say, Applebloom make more sense? Loving family, lots of friends, close enough to The Elements to be a gunuine security concern...

Not the bully's second shadow of a friend.

Silver Spoon frankly felt more like a one of those: 'HA! They shall never guess this twist!' type deals. That, or the author's favorite pony being used, drama and logic be damned.

Again, the actuall build-up was first-class, but I can't see why you'd use Silver Spoon. For me personally how little sense that made killed all the impact of the ending. :unsuresweetie:

Quite good. Well deserving a 'like'.
The choice of Silver Spoon be the hidden changeling works, because although she associates with a loud braggart, she herself goes almost completely unnoticed.
99% of me took everything the changeling said at face value, with only 1% thinking that this was an elaborate plot to PUT a changeling into Ponyville. The sequel to this would be a very interesting read. :pinkiehappy:

Wow. I really liked that. I never thought of there being a sort of exchange like that, I'd never thought past stasis cocoons. This is a really neat concept, and although it had a good one-shot ending, could be taken onward very well. Bravo, Author!

6287022 Awww :) Seriously though, thanks for the comment :)

Mostly I chose her because she's generally unnoticeable and fit my timeline reasoning. Will try to explain my reasoning. :)

From an age perspective I went with a younger pony, and also due to the nature of the changeling (future queen), it had to be a filly. The CMC were an option, but all have traumatic (to some degree) childhoods or complications. (The switch had to take pls e shortly after birth, to be true to the actual myth)

Sweetie Belle I am not even sure was born in Poneyville (although Rarity is stated to be).

Scootaloo is strongly speculated to be an orphan (and with wing defects).

As for Apple Bloom, it is still unknown when she lost her parents (speculation again). I decided to skip her in the event it might be at her birth. Also from AJ's story, Sweet Apple Acres went through a rough patch when she was young.

That pretty much leaves Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. Based on that, I associated DT more with wealth and SS with overall happiness (based on the saying)... So went with her :)

Hope the explanation helps :D

6287080 Thanks :) As a one shot, she was indeed honest in what she wrote. If it gets to a sequel, though... Who knows :P

6287101 Glad you enjoyed :) Is just my take on the original changeling myth (one of them at least) mixed with their representation in MLP :D

I got really confused here. You made it sound like a changeling replaces a pony but where is the pony and where the changeling? Why does the changeling have to eat wheb you say they dont?

This was really sweet.

6287187 Thanks for the question! :)

According to the myth I used, changeling is the word that both describes the actual changeling AND the pony/creature it replaces.

So the original Silver Spoon was born a pony, but was snatched away and replaced by a changeling (insect) that took her appearance.
Through this act Spoon the pony became a changeling (in name) and was raised in the hive. However, since she remains biologically a pony, she has to eat pony food.

Hope that helps :)

6287201 :) Glad you enjoyed :) Tried to make this a sad-with-a-happy-ending type of story :))

"Mirror's Image" anyone?
also for a second there I was convinced it was gonna be a real twilight, one of her friends or one of the cmc.
Rich parents are nice and all but not the most loving of homes

6287208 ooooh that explains it. Yes i am aware of the changeling myth I just got confused.

I dont exactly understand if the changeling society was smgood or bad exactly. Or if they are just ravenous monsters... Or how they treated her Friendship or love.

6287259 Aww. Are the stories similar? I had hoped this particular aspect of the changeling myth hadn't been used...

6287262 Well I take it they are just they :) They snack on her friendship if given a chance, but not out of ill intent :)

6287294 yeah similar, the real twilight was a still born, crysalis replaced her with her daughter.

There's a story for each of the mane six actually being a Changling from birth, I've only read a Twilight and an Applejack one, but The Applejack one doesn't have her replace anyone just sort of adopted.

6287297 Right. I just want to know so much.. I mean why did the invasion hapoen, why so hungry all the time? Why live in dishuise? *shrug*

6287320 Guess I'll put them on my to read list. Thanks :))

This is an interesting and enjoyable story that has good potential for a sequel.

This opens up so many possibilities of action.

Thank you for sharing your vision.

i demand a sequel.

A very nice piece ya got going on with this one! :)

A touching little tale, involving intrigue, deception, drama, turnabouts, it has it all!

We adore it, we most certainly do!

Aw...I was sort of hoping it would one of he Mane Six or something...

I'm pretty confused. Why give up a changeling? Why do they take ponies? Why did the queen have to raise it? I didn't realize that the pony was female or younger than an adult until you said that a filly wanted to come home. I got kind of lost with the mix of past and current explanation.

You got something adorable Lise

My mobile only showed the feature box title as "Dear Princess Twilight, my name is Spider Web, and..." and I got horrible flash backs to background pony

6287329 The Advent of Applejack (though that may be the second one) which I believe is the one mentioned

There's the 3 sisters Rarity, where a princess nymph takes Raritys form after Rares dies during the events where she gets her cutie mark in canon

And then there's a fluttershy one I can't aw remember the name of where the gist is basically her family were cloudsdale nobles who couldn't conceive and are left a disguised changeling nymph at their doorstep

6287819 "The Irony of Applejack" is the story, I'm reading the sequel "The Advent of Applejack" right now. "Winds of Change" is on my list for later as is the Rarity one you mentioned

A rather interesting choice of foals. If you think about it hard enough, there are some headcanons that can come up. Silver Spoon had her cutie mark before Diamond Tiara did (as evidenced by DT having her cute-ceanara in Call of the Cutie), and SS is one of those ponies canonically named in Season 1 who has a Cutie Mark exactly like her name, so the changeling taking her form probably played it safe with choosing a Cutie Mark...unless princesses somehow actually get a legit Cutie mark, which I can't process in my headcanon. Spider Web would probably make for an interesting filly whenever the switch is over with and she goes back to living with her real parents.

(I'm at work right now, but I can't actually recall seeing Silver Spoon at the wedding in Slice of Life, and the image gallery on the MLP wikia doesn't show her. It would be a real hell of a headcanon for this story if that Changeling at the wedding was the one that took Silver Spoon's spot!)

It wasn't bad, although the sadness was barely there. It was more a gateway for a more intriguing, longer overarching story, I feel.

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Thanks, you guys! :)))
I better start working on an outline then... (Please be patient with me O:))

6287555 Thank you, Master Wing! :)) Honoured you enjoyed :D
I'll do my best to live up to your expectations with the sequel. (Hopefully will approach your skill O:))

And thanks for the constant support and advice! Means a lot. :)

6288509 I'm sure you'll conquer it.

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