Thanks to all who've read so far for allowing me to come home after work to a solid zero thumbs down on this story! Have another chapter as a thank you Will try and keep busy on this one, thanks again! (Note: Further chapters will not be added as frequently as this, this is just one I made earlier. I will try and update every 2-3 weeks.)

The chapter was entertaining. Hope to see more of it to see how the Equestrians will evict the Feds.

6308560 The answer could be right beneath their hooves

Looks good so far. :)

6309083 Here's to hoping I keep/raise the quality. Note to self: Never write while sleepy/hungry.

6308560 An entire chapter immortal Demigods that's how
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Come you aliens, show me what passes for fury amongst your misbegotten kind!

6309139 Who says they even need a whole chapter Expect Astarte forces to remain within a double digit limit. For a while anyway.

6309159 Its not going to take many marines to ruin some weak ass aliens using autoguns. It only takes a company to take over a planet occupied by an actual 40k faction, forget some nameless race like these things.

If this Marine's actions speak for his Chapter, then they need to get themselves fuckin' purged as shit. Damn heretics, siding with xenos filth that would mock the sanctity of the human form and double as mutant witches too weak to defend themselves from alien incursion. Surprised they don't keep backdoors to the Empyrean in every damn thing so they can summon forth daemonic legions like the disgusting horse-sorcerers they are.

I mean, god damn, there's heresy, and then there's HERESY.

Things are picking up, I'm waiting to see what happens when these two forces meet.

6309607 I think your expectations for marines might be a little much there, but either way, the aliens featured so far are not nameless, they are Feds. That's right, they literally identify themselves by the organisation they've built over the last 300 years, they're pretty messed up like that. And they are far from helpless, and have a lot more than small arms held in orbit, ready to use on Equestria in case anything 'unexpected' occurs. Also, for clarification, the Magna-rifle is far from being an autogun, it's sort of like a .50 cal Barrett and a Tau pulse rifle had a baby, and will make a mess of the weak points in power armour.

6310475 .....Soon

6310251 ....This is not the story for you, buddy

6310601 I'm pretty well versed in the lore. Marines don't live several centuries by dying left and right like people have them do in certain stories. It takes 50 years just to field one out of a scouting company and its not like they can mass produce them. Let's hope we don't see any "Dawn of War" style underpowered marines here.

6310606
I'm kidding. It's a good story. You couldn't have much of a narrative if you just had Astartes violently decapitating everything that moved. You write decently (could use an editor, though), it's a fun story. Original content. Bodes well.

Keep it up.

Just as a fluff point, though, and you should feel free to write it how you please, but something like those magna-rifles you're describing still wouldn't matter much to a Space Marine. They're absurdly tough. An unarmored one just doesn't care about your average stubber (a .50 anti-materiel is considered crappy sidearm caliber in the 40K universe, after all) shooting at them--a few perforations are not something of major concern. Fluff Marines are OP as shit.

That said, I was thinking they were something like multi-staged railguns, because Tau, but I like the idea. I also like the whole "racial identity disintegrated in favor of identification by our distinctly fascist-tastic New World Order" aspect. It's an interesting flavor. I'll admit I had thought they were just a bunch of generic Fire Warriors at first, but you've managed to break away from that archetype. That's a good thing. Means you're original.

6310703 Once again, I can't say I agree with you entirely on what you're proposing, but 40k has always been quite interpretative, so I guess neither of us are 'right' on the matter. Do keep in mind this is very much Alternate Universe 40k, so expect some changes to be made to the marines when compared to their 40k cousins. However I can promise you that the space marines being written into this story are far from Dawn of War's marine-made-of-playdoh, and are still the finest infantry the galaxy has seen to date. However I have never agreed with empowering characters to a degree in which they essentially become invulnerable, so expect awesome space-knights taking on 1000/1 odds and winning, but expect a handful of losses each bout. I hope you consider sticking around through the next few chapters to give me some feedback on the writing on the marine characters, thank you

6311584 I am not good with internet humour I usually need a 'lol' or 'jk' to help me realize when someone is joking around, sorry I misunderstood you earlier This is the thing, a handful of novels (both Black Library and fan-made) have made Astartes extremely overpowered, and it's something I could never get behind when trying to write a decent story. A good story has the audience caring about the characters well-being, and this is exercised by putting the characters through painfully stressful times and moments when they're in genuine mortal danger. So don't expect these marines to take .50 cal rounds to the bare chest like bee-stings, expect them to be, for a lack of a better term that I can think of, 'biologically balanced'. In this story, a marines bones can withstand and even deflect the impact of a low powered/caliber bullet, they can bench up to 3 tonnes on a good day without power armour and can run 50-60 MPH when given some space. However heavy caliber rounds can hurt them, and through severe spinal/multi-cardiac/brain damage, kill them. Also, keep in mind Magna-rifles aren't just like a .50 cal rifle, they are like a type of railgun that uses electro-stimulated chemical rounds, which are accelerated under extreme exposure to high voltages. It'll put clean through a guy in bomb-disposal armour, maybe two, and space marines aren't entirely covered in 3-5 inches of ceramic titanium with adamantium ribbing I hope the idea of marine characters taking some bad hits doesn't put you off, your feedback is very much appreciated And don't worry, the marines are Blood Angel successors, so blood and innards are pretty much assured later in the story

6312088
Yeah, I mean, write them how you please--I'll never be offended by that. There's a lot of variability, so don't fuss about conflicting headcanons on Marine powerlevels. You're telling a good story so far, and that's the important thing, not the nominal distance an electromagnetically-motivated smart-fuzed sabot armature could impact into ceramic body armor and retain lethality. Those are pissy details and you mostly seem to understand that.

Do be careful to avoid what has been termed "Counterstrike Syndrome," though. It's the idea of putting in far too much detail about the weaponry being carried by the various dudes of your story, without focusing on the people themselves. Obviously the fact that this is a science fiction setting with no obvious real-life firearm analogues mitigates the risk a little, but when you're describing a Fed's (really, good job on the aliens, I'm liking their characterization) gun, be careful. Tac rails could play a part in the story later, but I find that subjecting parts like that to the test of Chekhov's Gun can be an extremely effective chaff-removal tool.

Ok I can get AU Astartes. I'm a big fan of fluff statistics and such when talking about 40k, and pretty much everything can shrug off shit like that aside from unaltered humans. However, suspense of disbelief is easy to achieve with the whole au thing.

6313625 I am a criminal when it comes to overstimulating detail, so I'll do my best to keep things flowing, but do forgive me if I get caught up in myself from time to time I suppose I just like to expose readers to what I'm seeing in my own head with as much clarity, I'll have to see how that pans out as this story progresses. And don't worry about the events eclipsing the characters, there'll be just as much focus on the people/ponies in this story as there will be there surroundings and the tools they use, but painting a clear picture of these things is something I've always felt the need to do.

6314635 These marines have a fair few differences from 40k marines, but these differences will be made apparent as the story goes along. For now all you really need to know about them is they're enough like their 40k variant as to behave and withstand the same things in combat. And combat, along with application of physics, is something I want to hold at least a portion of believability to it, I get this might seem obsolete in a universe were magic and daemons exist, but I've always felt it's a good quality to have at a stories side so the audience can ground themselves firmly within the story. It's all very impressive when a bolt-round is described as blasting a soldier into red mist, but I find it leaves a real impression describing it as how it would more likely work in the real world. The results are a lot more graphic than just leaving behind a smear on the floor

6315216 Sounds good to me! I'm looking forward to more.

Good job making an absolutely hateable Alien Empire, that actually makes you think Space Marines would be better, while still feeling plausible. I'm just now reading this, but I hope the Astartes kick their ignorant asses, and Equestria ends up alright. Bad endings for ponies are something I've always hated.

6312044
extremely late............ but well there is a reason bolters turn every unarmored thing to a pulverized mess, they are essentially 40mm rocket propelled grenades.

they explode after penetrating their target, turning it into an assaults' rifle- RPG hybrid.

this is why other franchises tend to lose vs 40k debates, no other franchises considers a rocket propelled grenade launcher as standard kit/ armament.

if they think regular humans are stingy about rules, the space marines are going to be even more so.